Chapter 39 #2
And when I was done walking through the safe parts of the forest, I had to return to the training grounds and beat my opponents.
All of them. Miharel wouldn’t have had it any other way; not that he had ever bothered to come see me train, but he always knew about each knee scrape and victory, like a true Greycrest, using information against his own family.
“A benevolent diplomat,” Allie said, yanking me back to reality.
A reality in which she stood in my bedroom–the only woman to enter this room, ever–dressed in nothing but a piece of silk I could rip away in a second, yet she mesmerized me more with her words and that unflinching heart of hers.
“It’s…hard. Almost impossible to juggle both, I know. ”
She was probably one of the very few people on this continent–if not the only other one–who could understand.
Allie came from a different realm, where principles and protection were the stones on which her Clan had been built, yet we saw the world the same, didn’t we?
And we saw each other, pride, protection, and all.
“But we somehow manage to do it,” I said.
“We have to.” She shrugged, as if she hadn’t carried almost an entire Clan on her shoulders.
I fisted my palms; they ached to circle those same shoulders and feel her words vibrating through her body.
“Your Clan and people may never know how you shielded them, but you do. I do. And you were right to make that decision, Ryker.”
I hadn’t known I’d needed to hear that until now.
Whatever ice cage I’d had to erect around my soul to keep it safe began to thaw and crack.
Perhaps I’d only told this secret to Allie, after all these years of promising to take it with me to the crypt, because I’d felt she’d understand.
Not judge.
Not question.
Not laugh at what I still struggled to see as a success.
See, listen, and comprehend the magnitude of it without recoiling.
The tension cascaded down my spine, down my legs, and dissipated onto the floor in one sudden wave. That peak of tightness which I’d been carrying between my shoulders for years finally loosened.
The shift was so quick, I had to blink through it, white spots dancing in my vision. The breath whooshed out of my lungs in one long breath.
“Thank you,” I muttered.
“For what?”
“For being you.”
I took Allie’s hands in mine and brought them to my chest, trying to convey through touch what my lips couldn’t form.
The complete and utter gratitude drumming through me at this moment.
She arched her brows, confused, but the smile playing on her lips was open and relieved. “You’re welcome?”
She still didn’t understand what her attitude–her very essence–was doing to me.
“Gods, woman. You might be the end of me or my salvation.” I held on tighter to her hands, sliding them over my heart. “Either way, it’s going to be a mad ride living and leading with you.”
Sharing everything, from the highest of highs, to the responsibilities, laughs, cries, and success.
Perhaps the Clan Council knew what they were doing when they gave that arranged marriage decree.
I didn’t believe in coincidences. Especially not ones that felt this good.
Her brows softened, but her gaze hardened, ghosts of the past pulling her in different directions.
I knew that feeling well–when you were too afraid to hope.
I understood.
I feared the power she already had over me, too.
“Only time will tell,” she said, like a true diplomat. “One thing I know for sure–you stood up for me against Silas. I’m standing by your side against Beren.”
Could she feel my heart leaping at that promise? Did I want her to?
“They raise you supportive in Aquila,” I muttered.
“They raise us stubborn–and I won’t stand by and let another city fall to someone’s greed. I’ve already lost one home, I won’t lose another. What’s the plan?”
My lips parted, yet I hesitated. Allie had already found out so much–too much. The fallen star, my secret, a way to get out of Solkar’s Reach undetected.
All of them were risks for my realm.
But getting inside the crater and finding the fallen star was a difficult task.
However, there was one more secret, even grander than that, which could seal our fates if used improperly.
I wanted to let Allie in–but trust truly was a fickle thing.
“When you escaped Solkar’s Reach,” I began. “Did you hear anything?”
A tremble coursed through Allie, eyes glazing with terror.
“Yes,” she said curtly.
“Did you see anything?”
She shook her head, the curtain of her dark locks brushing against my chest. “I was too scared to open my eyes. Why?”
I tapped her fingers against my chest, biding time.
This was the kind of decision one didn’t make lightly.
But time was against me.
Us.
We needed to act. Fast.
I could have lied. I could have done what I always did, protect everyone alone.
It would have made more strategic sense.
Not even the gods would have blamed me for hiding this mystery from a former enemy. Even one as formidable as Allie.
But I simply didn’t want to.
“Because I’m leaving for the crater’s entry point tomorrow,” I said. “And I want you to come with me.”