Chapter 16
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Sienna
His words hit me like physical blows, staggering me. I’d had plenty of men tell me they wanted me, how attractive I was, but this wasn’t the same. This wasn’t a man who thought he had some sort of claim on me or that I owed him something. This was a strong, powerful man who could have any woman he wanted with a snap of his fingers, and I’d captured him. The way he said it, the pure need in his voice, it was as if he was my prisoner.
I only had one reaction that could let him know how his words made me feel.
I threw myself at him, knowing that he’d catch me, and crashed my mouth into his. He groaned, the hands now on my ass squeezing. I pushed my tongue between his lips, flicking against his teeth and tongue as I dug my fingers into his hair. The ache I’d been trying so hard to ignore was back stronger than ever. I knew all too well what he’d meant when he’d said that he needed me so badly that it hurt. I felt that pain now and knew there was only one cure for it.
It was probably irresponsible, unprofessional, and just a bad idea, but I didn’t care. The last few days had been an emotional rollercoaster, and he promised something better than some fake, fairy tale romance. He offered forgetfulness. Complete and uncomplicated bliss.
Breaking the kiss, I pulled back far enough to meet his eyes. The intensity I saw there made my breath catch.
“I need you inside me,” I whispered, my voice husky with desire.
A flicker of hesitation crossed his face, and I caught it immediately. My heart raced as I tried to guess what had him unsure.
“What is it?” I asked, running my fingers through his hair. “Talk to me.”
He swallowed hard. “Sienna, I... I want this so badly. But are you sure? I mean, Gavin and-“
I pressed a finger to his lips, silencing him. “Shh. I’m sure. More than sure.” I trailed my hand down his chest, feeling his muscles tense under my touch. “Unless you don’t want to?”
His eyes darkened. “God, I want to. You have no idea how much.”
I smirked, grinding my hips against him. “Oh, I think I have some idea.”
He groaned, his hands tightening on my waist. “You’re killing me, you know that?”
“That’s not my intention at all,” I purred, nipping at his earlobe. “Quite the opposite, actually.”
The heat returned, and he set me on my feet. “You’re gonna fulfill a fantasy I’ve had since the moment I met you.”
Not giving me the chance to ask what that was, he spun me around to face my desk and put his hand against the small of my back. I didn’t need a diagram to tell me what he wanted. I leaned forward, bracing myself on my elbows even though I knew I’d probably end up with my face against the cool, smooth surface at some point.
“You look good from any angle, but I have to say, this is definitely one of my favorites.”
Cool air caressed my skin as he flipped up the back of my dress, exposing the black lace thong I wore underneath. He made a sound a lot like a growl and then gave one cheek a smack, hard enough to sting, but not even close to what it’d take to make me protest.
His hand slid down between my legs, moving aside the damp fabric to touch my sensitive skin. Without giving me a warning, he shoved a finger inside me, and I cried out, clenching around the intruding digit.
“Tell me if it’s too much.” The rough edge to his voice told me that even though this wasn’t fueled by anger, he would not be gentle.
“It’s good.” The words came out breathless, but I couldn’t find it in me to be embarrassed because at that moment, he added a second finger and my brain short-circuited.
My head fell forward, my eyes closing as I blocked out everything but the sensation of his fingers thrusting and twisting inside me. The first time we’d had sex, I’d been worked up from arguing, making me wet enough that it’d only been the pressure from his size that’d put a little pain into things. That wasn’t the case right now. I was turned on by the kiss and his words, but my body hadn’t quite caught up to where the rest of me was and even his fingers caused enough friction to burn as he worked to get me ready.
Just as I approached the point of actually hurting, his knuckles pushed against my g-spot and my entire body jerked. He chuckled and rotated his hand so that he could rub against that spot inside me. I hadn’t realized that he’d gone to his knees until his mouth was on me, tongue soothing even as his fingers kept up their relentless motion inside me.
When I came, my lungs emptied into a soundless scream. My knees almost buckled from the force of it and my arms gave out, the upper half of my body collapsing on the desk. I felt a sharp sting from what felt like teeth, but then his fingers were gone, giving my g-spot one final stroke before they left me empty. A mini orgasm rolled through me, and I shuddered. Every bit of me was tingling and I knew we weren’t done yet.
Somehow, Fury kept me on my feet and still get a condom from somewhere and roll it on. While we’d covered the fact that we didn’t necessarily need it, I appreciated he hadn’t assumed that it was okay this time.
That fleeting thought was all I had time for because he was positioning himself at my entrance. He leaned over my back and put his mouth to my ear.
“Say yes .”
I wiggled my ass, trying to push back against him, some part of me wanting to resist even though I definitely still wanted him to fuck me.
“Say yes , Sienna, and I’ll give you what you want.” The teasing note in his voice was low, sensual. “A good, hard fucking.”
I made a mewling sound that turned into an annoyed growl when he chuckled. “Just do it already.”
He made a tsking noise and nipped my earlobe. “Not until you say yes .” He scraped his teeth against the side of my neck. “And then I’ll make you scream. Take you so hard that you’ll feel me for days.”
Fuck .
My competitive nature was no match for my libido. “Yes. Okay? I said it. Yes. Just fuck–”
He drove the last word from my mind as surely as he drove the air from my lungs. I was suddenly, impossibly, full, stretched around the thick length of him. He held himself there as he wrapped my braid around his hand and pulled my head back.
“This is going to be hard and fast,” he warned. “Tell me if it’s too much.”
And that was all the warning I got before he started moving, slamming into me hard enough to make my desk shake. As I got my feet underneath me, I pushed back against him, refusing to passively take what he was giving me. With every withdrawal, I tightened around him, earning an extra tug on my hair and a muttered curse from my partner, both of which just added to the pleasure racing across my nerves.
I was getting close … and impatient.
Sneaking my hand beneath me, I slipped my fingers beneath the tiny triangle of the front of my panties. I’d barely brushed against my clit before Fury was bent over my back again, his hand closing around my wrist.
“Fury,” I ground out his name.
“I get to make you come,” he said, squeezing just enough to make me catch my breath.
Then, instead of pulling my hand away, he slid his fingers between mine so that we were teasing my clit together. The new position kept him from going too deep, but there was something about the way he covered me, surrounded me, that spoke to the mental part of what we were doing.
When he pressed his lips to the bare skin at the top of my spine, it sent a shiver through me that was more than just physical. I whimpered his name, my breathing quickening as I felt the familiar build-up. I was so close.
“Need … need … Fury…”
“That’s right,” he said. “Got what you need.”
Pushing himself deep, he pulled my head back to a nearly painful angle. As he fastened his lips to the side of my throat, my breathing stuttered. I felt the pull of his mouth and the sting of his teeth, and knew he was leaving a mark, but I couldn’t tell him not to. Not when it was that realization that tipped me over the edge.
I came with a wail, Fury’s and my fingers pressing against my throbbing clit to draw out my climax. My pussy was still pulsing around him as his hips jerked against me once, twice, and on the third time, he let out a groan that sounded a lot like my name.
We stayed there for a minute, catching our breath and letting our pulses return to normal. He was just starting to get too heavy when he let out a sigh and straightened. I made a strangled sound when he pulled out and barely caught myself before my wobbly legs completely gave out.
I heard him rustling around in my desk but didn’t have the strength yet to look up. By the time I managed to stand, he held out some hand wipes. I thanked him quietly, but that was all either of us said as we cleaned ourselves up. The silence wasn’t awkward between us, but charged, as if we hadn’t been using up the attraction between us, but ramping it up.
He was the one who finally broke the silence. “I’ve got to go. It’s a weeknight and I have a meeting fairly early tomorrow.”
I nodded. “Yeah, okay.”
I knew I still sounded a little dazed, but having two toe-curling orgasms would do that to a girl. He flashed me a slightly arrogant smile—one that he’d more than earned—and went to the door. Instead of leaving, though, he paused, turned, and came back to me. With a familiar hunger in his eyes, he grabbed the back of my neck and yanked me to him, covering my mouth in a fierce, scorching kiss.
It lasted only a few seconds and then he was gone, with me staring at the doorway, trying not to panic. I’d frozen when he’d kissed me, but thanks to years of needing to hide my emotions to survive, I managed to relax and kiss him back enough that he didn’t notice that anything was wrong. Only after he closed the door behind him did I let out the breath I’d been holding, and sank down to the floor.
I could hear my teeth chattering and feel my body shaking, but those things felt very far away. Everything was far away as my mind took me back several years, back to a time I really didn’t like to think about too much.
But sometimes, I didn’t have a choice.
His fingers dug into the back of my neck, pulling me to him for a kiss I didn’t want. He pushed his tongue into my mouth, making me gag.
“If you gag on my cock like that, I’ll cut your fucking tongue out.”
I squeezed my eyes shut, as if that could stop what I was seeing, even though it was in my head.
His hand on my neck was familiar now, as was the pain from his grip. I’d have bruises the size and shape of his fingers by the time he was done. As he used his hold on me to keep me from backing off when he shoved his cock between my lips. I focused on trying to breathe whenever I could, but the black spots dancing behind my eyelids said I was probably going to pass out. Again.
My breathing was ragged, coming in gasps as if I was being choked, even though I knew that wasn’t happening. Logically, I knew I was having a panic attack and flashbacks. It had happened to me before. But I could only ride it out. I’d never been able to stop them before. Just like I’d never been able to stop him.
I’d begged not to go with him, but had only gotten a slap as an answer. Now I was cringing away from him, even though I knew it’d just piss him off. And I couldn’t escape. The moment I felt that hand on my neck, I froze, all hope draining out of me.
Tears streamed down my cheeks as the images finally stopped coming. Once able to breathe, I took in large gulps of air and waited for the nausea that always came with one of these attacks. They usually only happened as nightmares now, but the moment Fury had grabbed the back of my neck, it was like I was back there again.
I couldn’t do this. I couldn’t risk having another one of those attacks. I had too much going on, too much at stake. I couldn’t be distracted. If I could’ve guaranteed that I could avoid all triggers, maybe it would’ve worked, but I couldn’t control every aspect of our lives. Fury wasn’t that sort of man. And if I was being honest with myself, I wouldn’t have wanted him if he was that sort of guy. But wanting him didn’t mean I could be with him.