Chapter Thirty-Nine
Thirty-Nine
“You know, we could still wait and go in the dead of night like two thieves.” Davien sits across the carriage from me, looking rather pleased by the notion.
I laugh easily, louder and brighter than I ever have before.
Laughter becomes more natural by the day.
Even though it has been nearly three months since I was formally crowned as the Fae Queen and my responsibilities have increased beyond my imagination, I feel lighter.
For the first time in my life, I know where I belong.
Granted, knowing where I belong doesn’t mean it’s easy to be there.
But the hard work is more palatable because I know it means something.
“I’m not going in the night. I’m getting Misty myself. And I’m confronting them once and for all.” I made a promise to myself when I entered the High Court, one I’m determined to make good on. But I don’t tell him that.
Davien smiles. He knows what this means to me. He knows why I need it. But still, he wouldn’t make me feel like a coward if I needed to run.
“I’ll be with you the entire time, or not, whatever you prefer.”
“I think I want to try and do this on my own.” I reach over and pat his knee.
“But I so appreciate that you came with me to do this. Knowing you’re here makes all the difference.
” He’s my second in command whenever I’m unable to rule—which is often, as I’m still spending many hours a day learning how to use my magic and studying the nuances of Midscape.
There’s so much for me to learn, so much history I’m now a part of and need to remember…
especially since the Elf King and Human Queen unexpectedly requested an audience with me shortly before we left.
As soon as we return, we’ll move right into final preparations for their arrival.
Which are many, since we only just wrapped up our springtime rites—so many festivals in Midscape to observe.
Vena is overseeing things in our absence, with Shaye, Giles, Oren, and Hol assisting her.
I couldn’t imagine better people to have at my side as I settle into ruling.
“Whatever you need, I’m always here.”
“Knowing that is what’s giving me strength.” I look him in the eye as I speak, so, hopefully, he knows how sincere I am.
But Davien must mistake the meaning of my gaze, because he leans forward to kiss me fiercely. It’s a kiss that promises more later, should I be inclined. And I am always inclined when it comes to him.
“I would go to the ends of the earth for you.”
“I would traverse worlds for you.” I laugh and he does too, rubbing his nose against mine.
Both are true. I lean back in my seat, looking out the window.
The Natural World is so plain compared to Midscape.
These streets seem so little, the houses that once intimidated me so unimportant.
“I remember the last time I rode in this carriage. I was nervous about meeting my husband.”
“Oh, that’s right…” Davien trails off with small smile. “We’re back in the Natural World. That means we’re married again.” I snort laughter. “Perhaps we should consummate that marriage tonight. We never did in this realm.”
I smirk. “You would like that, wouldn’t you?”
“You know I would like it very much.”
We both heard the whispers at court. People are expecting us to be betrothed within the year.
Davien and I have discussed the topic only in passing.
There are more important things for us to worry about than formalizing our love in Midscape.
Moreover, I’m not ready. I’m still learning how to love and how to be a queen.
I want to master both of those before I think of getting married again—properly, this time.
Davien has been more than patient on the matter and has insisted that the next time we wed, it will be on my terms.
The carriage turns up the drive to my family’s manor. I inhale sharply as the familiar lawn comes into view. It’s far lusher than I have ever seen it. Gardeners are out tending hedges. I suppose Joyce didn’t squander the money yet if there’s still coin to pay such a staff.
Davien squeezes my knee. “You’ll do great.”
“I know,” I say softly. And yet my stomach is in knots as the carriage comes to a stop at the top of the drive.
Unsurprisingly, Laura is the first to greet us.
She races out of the house and skids to a stop in the gravel next to the carriage.
I open the door and see her eyes widen slightly as she gets her first look at Davien.
Now that he has spent proper time in Midscape, he can hide his wings and glamour his unnatural beauty to appear as nothing more than a human.
Even still, he is stunning. In my peripheral vision, I see him give her a wink.
Laura’s breath hitches. “Katria, I, you—you weren’t lying, he’s very handsome.”
I laugh, wrap her up in my arms, and squeeze her tightly. “It’s good to see you, sister.”
“I’ve missed you so much.”
I can hear the pain and longing in her voice. It resonates deep within me, solidifying my resolve. I was unsure of what I intended to say next. But now that I’m here, I know what I have to do. No hesitation, Katria.
“I’ve missed you too.” I pull away. I know Helen and Joyce are coming. I must be quick while it’s just the two of us. I put my hands on my sister’s shoulders and look her right in the eye. “Your mother is not a good woman.”
“Katria—”
“I know you might think me biased. And that might be true. But I know you also see it,” I continue, voice level and determined.
“Do not let her corrupt your kindness, Laura. Leave this place as soon as you can. You can come with me. You can marry your own handsome man. You can strike out on your own and forge your own path as a businesswoman or an artist or a musician, whatever you please—I will support you in any passion. But leave while you can and while you still have the heart I adore.”
Laura doesn’t get a chance to respond.
“Katria?” Helen is the first to emerge.
“I believe it is Lady Fenwood,” I say loftily as I smooth my loose-fitting tunic of fae silk and step away from our younger sister.
“What are you doing here?” Helen manages to say through her shock.
“I’ve come to collect my horse.” I start toward the stables.
“But—that’s—you can’t—”
I pause to give her a sharp look. “I assure you, I can.” I continue to the stables to do what I should have done months ago.
“I’m going to tell Mother!” She runs inside. Laura stands alone in the drive, too stunned to speak.
“Go and tell Mother, that’s the only thing you’ve been able to do for your entire life,” I mutter under my breath.
Cordella is outside the barn, to my pleasant surprise. She nearly drops the rake she is using to collect hay for the horses at the sight of me.
“Well, old gods be resurrected. I never expected to see you around here again.”
“I didn’t expect it myself. But I won’t be here for long.
And I assure you, this is the last time I ever step foot in this place.
But it’s good to see you, old friend,” I say sincerely.
Cordella always did her best for me. Sometimes her best didn’t feel like enough, but I have enough distance now that I can appreciate all her help. “How is Misty?”
“She needs to stretch her legs a bit. But I do what I can to keep her in top shape.” Cordella wears a knowing smile. “You finally come to collect her?”
“I have.” I start toward the stable. “You knew I would come back?”
“I had a feeling.” Cordella assesses me from the top of my head to my toes and back up. She gives me a nod of approval. “You look good, Katria. You hold yourself better than you did when I last saw you.”
“I know who I am now,” I answer easily. I am the last of the Aviness bloodline.
I am the queen of the fae. But I am also the daughter of a merchant lord, and I grew up in an abusive home with a father and stepmother who modeled all the wrong kinds of love.
I am whole and broken and mending. I am all those things and more.
I am Katria Applegate Aviness, and I will never feel small again.
“Katria?” Joyce’s shrill voice interrupts our conversation.
“Please tack up Misty,” I say to Cordella. “And I will make sure that they know not to dare punish you for doing so.”
“With pleasure, Your Ladyship.” Cordella bows her head and heads into the barn.
“Yes?” I stare at Joyce as she tries to lord over me from the veranda. I have been dreading this moment, but now that it’s here, I find myself fearless. She holds no power over me any longer. The final knot in my chest unfurls and I can breathe again.
Joyce means nothing to me now and that is even more powerful than hating her.
“We did not expect you to come back so soon.” The words are fake etiquette.
“I’m here only for a moment.” And it has been months since I left. So soon? I can only assume she did not want me to come back at all. “I’m collecting something I made the mistake of leaving behind. Don’t worry—once I leave this time, I’ll be gone for good.”
“There is nothing here for you.”
“There won’t be soon.”
“Misty is ready, Your Ladyship,” Cordella calls, leading the horse from the stables.
“Thank you.” I take Misty’s reins and pass Cordella a pouch heavy with gold nuggets from the fae treasury. It’s enough that she could go out and do whatever pleases her. She can be free of this place too.
“What do you think you’re doing?” Joyce demands.
“I’m taking what is mine.” I mount Misty and sit tall.
“I’m taking the last of me that is in this house and I’m leaving for good.
You will never see me again. You will never hear from me again.
You will never be welcome in any house or lands that belong to me.
Because I have found a family who celebrates me.
” I think of Oren, Giles, Hol, Raph, Shaye, Vena, and all of Dreamsong who have supported me in the first months of my reign.
“I have found meaning, purpose, and true love. You have no power over me anymore. You tried to make me afraid of you for the rest of my life, but it didn’t work.
I am free of you, and I’m going to take Misty with me to my new world.
This is farewell forever.” I pause, leveling my eyes at Joyce.
“And if you dare think to punish Cordella for this, I will find out and you will know my wrath.”
“You—you—stop right there!” Joyce stammers.
“No.” With a light kick from me, Misty springs into a trot.
I can tell she remembers me. The feeling of her gait brings a smile to my lips.
Fae horses are good, but they were never mine.
I round the front of the manor faster than Joyce can keep up.
Helen is still by the main doors, gaping down at the drive.
I can tell why: Davien is leaning against the carriage talking with Laura.
“I see you got your horse.” He pushes away from the carriage.
“I did,” I say proudly. “My business here is done.”
“Katria,” Laura says. “When you said…I could go with you…” She looks from Davien to me.
Davien is clearly uncertain, but even now, he defers to me.
I have the power of Aviness, after all. If anyone can find a way to give Laura a place in Midscape, it is me.
At the very least, I can give her the manor on this side of the Fade for as long as she needs or wants it or until she’s ready to strike out on her own grand adventure, whatever that might be.
“You will always have a place with me, sister.”
Laura’s face crumples with relief. I wonder if she’s been harboring guilt for Joyce’s and Helen’s actions. I wonder if she thought I hated her as I hated them. There are many discussions to be had between us, but we will have time for them.
“You’re sure?” she whispers.
“I decree it.” I smirk slightly. I’m looking forward to her reaction when she learns that my husband did indeed have magic, and he taught it to me—in a way. Laura will do just fine mingling with fae, I think. “Ride in the carriage.”
“But my things?”
“If we don’t go now, Joyce might never let you leave,” I say solemnly. “I swear I will give you anything you need and more.” Laura’s gaze drifts back to the house as Joyce rounds the veranda to stand by Helen. Laura must know this is true because she begins to climb in behind Davien.
“What are you doing?” Joyce shrieks as she flies down the stairs.
I position Misty between her and my sister. “She is doing what she wants.”
“That is my daughter, you—you’re kidnapping her!”
“I’m leaving, Mother,” Laura says, sounding a little shaky but braver than I could’ve hoped. I’ve never been more proud. She has always been the strong one between us. “I’ll write to you if I’m able.”
“How dare you!” Joyce says as the door closes. Helen continues to stand motionless, expression alternating between dumbstruck and angry. “You cannot—”
“Laura and I will do as we please. Goodbye, Joyce.” Further conversation is pointless. I spur Misty into a trot and give a nod to Oren as I pass. I hear the carriage come to life with the clopping of hooves behind me.
Joyce gives chase, screaming, until we’re halfway down the drive.
What a pitiable creature. She might never realize that this pain is what her actions have wrought.
But maybe Helen will. Maybe there’s some good left in her and this will be the catalyst for her change. I can only hope so, for her sake.
But they are no longer my problem. I look ahead, leaving them and the manor behind me.
As a lone rider, I’m faster than the carriage.
I know my way back to my home—my kingdom.
This time, I will ride down the hillsides of my family’s estate, through the hazy dawn, and into the forbidden woods.
I will keep riding until I locate the old markers that Giles and Hol taught me how to use to find my way through the dark mist that separates Midscape from the human world.
My heart races in tandem with Misty’s thunderous gallop.
The torturous dirge Joyce had conducted for my life has come to an end. But a new song is just beginning. One with my sister, with the man who will be my husband in both worlds, and with my kingdom.