Chapter 15 Ellis #2
And she smelled different. Like she’d put on something she didn’t normally wear. The scent was spicy, a little sweet, a mix of vanilla and something that reminded me of the incense she burned back at her shop. It was the kind of scent that curled into your brain and moved in permanently.
I jerked my gaze back to the burger and took a bite, tasting nothing and everything all at once.
I needed to get a grip.
I took a sip of water and eyed the pills I had to take. One more bite of burger first. I maneuvered it carefully, trying not to spill anything on my clothes.
I’d managed to pull together a pair of dark denim jeans that actually fit, my best black V-neck sweater, and I’d tousled my hair with some texture cream I’d packed, using the crappy motel hair dryer.
“You clean up nice,” Dove had said casually when I’d emerged from the bathroom.
I hadn’t known what to do with the fluttering in my chest or the tingling in my stomach. I hadn’t known how to unpack how it felt to have her look at me… like that. Because there had been a look. That look that had been becoming more and more frequent between the two of us.
“So, Ellis,” Liv’s voice cut through my thoughts, and I blinked up at her, the burger going limp in my hand, “you ever been out before?”
I set down my burger and wiped my hands on a paper napkin.
“No,” I answered honestly. “I was sick most of my teenage years, and by the time most people were sneaking into clubs or getting drunk at their friends’ houses, I was usually too tired, or on some sort of medication I couldn’t mix with alcohol. ”
Dove tilted her head slightly, and her loose, glossy hair shifted gently over her shoulders—shoulders more visible in her fitted shirt, her figure no longer swallowed up by an oversized tee. I felt the immense weight of her attention the moment her eyes landed on me.
I scooped up my pills, tossed them back, and drank my water, just to give myself something to do.
“Well,” Liv said, leaning back in the booth, her arms folded behind her head. “I practically lived at parties when I was alive. Bonfires, house shows, raves. You name it. I’m genuinely surprised I lived as long as I did, considering half the stupid shit I got up to.”
Dove laughed, the sound so real and unfiltered it did something both wonderful and terrifying to my chest.
“What about you, mystique?” Liv asked with a grin, her eyes twinkling.
Dove shrugged and smiled coyly, tearing a piece off her grilled cheese.
“Well, I mean, I went to parties and stuff. They were okay, mostly loud and full of obnoxious people. I never really got into the drinking or the drugs that went around. I hated feeling like shit the next day, and it just seemed like a lot of effort for a few hours of fake confidence.”
She smiled at Liv, and I noticed the faintest dimple curve into her cheek as she did.
“I like to have fun,” Dove added. “I just like it on my terms. Always have.”
I took a few more bites of my burger before deciding I was done, focusing on finishing my water and trying not to panic about the venue we were about to enter.
“You’ll like tonight,” Dove said, a small, secretive grin playing on her lips as she looked at me, like she’d been reading my mind.
I wasn’t sure if it was her words or just the way she said them, but for the first time since the plan had been announced, some of the terror ebbed away. Maybe it was the lingering scent of vanilla still teasing my senses, or the way Dove smiled, as if she knew something I didn’t.
Or maybe, God help me, it was the hope that for once, I wouldn’t be the only one standing awkwardly at the edge of whatever was about to happen here.
By the time we walked into Frankie’s, I was already feeling halfway to emotionally drained, my own nerves chewing me up from the inside, setting me on edge.
The bar was sensory overload in its highest form.
Pulsing neon signs lined the walls—rainbows, martinis, vinyl records scattered among them like a collage of pure chaos.
No matter where you looked, every surface seemed to hum with life.
A giant wooden bar stretched across one side of the buzzing room, framed by shelves stacked with bottles that glittered like trophies.
Posters of old pride marches and drag queen pageants covered one wall near the booths tucked into the corners. A handful of high tables crowded around a small elevated stage at the back, nearly all fully occupied.
A figure stood on the stage, just above the dance floor, draped in sequins. They wore a glittery blue blazer that shimmered under the giant disco ball, and their booming, deep voice carried across the room.
“Welcome to Frankie’s! It’s trivia night!” Their voice tilted upward, practically singing the word trivia. “If you’re a walk-in, don’t fret. We’ll find you a team! No one ever plays alone at Frankie’s.”
They wiggled their brows at the room, then threw out a fishnet-covered leg, showing off a terrifying pair of blue platforms.
Dove was practically vibrating with joy beside me, bouncing on her toes. “Oh my God, yes! Trivia!”
My internal organs were already seizing up, my eyes darting at every new sight or sound.
I hardly registered Dove taking my hand, wrapping her fingers around mine, and leading me toward the high tables.
I was too deep in my own mind, mentally calculating every possible way this night could end.
Humiliation? General awkwardness? Blacking out from embarrassment?
All had high odds across the board. I was a punter’s dream bet.
“We don’t have to—” My weak protest was cut off.
“Come on, Ellis,” Dove said, a teasing lilt in her voice. “Trivia! You love facts. We couldn’t have shown up on a better night. Oh, look, there are two seats free there.”
As Dove dragged me along, I caught sight of Liv strutting across the bar in her sequined outfit, shimmying as if the whole room could see her, as if we were her personal audience.
“Hi!” Dove’s voice rose, bright and friendly, snapping me back to the present. “Were you two waiting on anyone else, or could we crash your team?”
I looked up.
Two girls, maybe midtwenties, a brunette with a crooked smile and a faded band tee, and a petite blonde with a tattoo sleeve peeking out from under her flannel.
“For sure!” the brunette said with a smile. “Our friends bailed on us anyway. I’m Jules.”
“And I’m Siena,” the blonde added, her eyes twinkling as she looked us over.
Dove grinned and nodded as we slid into the seats. “I’m Dove, and this is Ellis.”
“Dove,” Siena repeated, her blue eyes shining. “That’s a unique name.”
“Like the bird,” Dove said, her lips still curved in a smile. “Not the soap.”
Siena let out a giggle, and I didn’t miss the quick side-eye her friend Jules shot her. When Jules caught me watching, I hurriedly looked away.
The rattling laughter of other tables and the clinking of glasses filled my ears as a hum of easy energy buzzed around us. No one here looked like they cared about schedules or binders or the crippling need to plan an exit strategy.
They were just living.
Loudly.
I swallowed and curled my fingers under the table, digging my nails into my palms as I tried to ground myself.
There were so many people.
A waitress came over to take drink orders for the table. The two across from us ordered some kind of cocktail. Dove ordered a Coke, and I asked for water, once again avoiding eye contact with the two strangers.
“Relax,” Dove breathed into my ear as the others ordered. “They won’t bite. Maybe if you ask...”
I shot her a look, and she smirked, that stupid dimple showing again, sending my already flurried emotions spiraling.
Now she was talking to Jules and Siena as if she’d known them forever, telling them about our trek across Route 66—omitting a lot of the details—twirling her straw between her fingers.
Her shimmering brown hair caught the neon lights, and there may have been half a second when the noise and the fear faded, and there was just her.
“All right, my beautiful nerds and queerdos!” our trivia host called out, clapping their hands, the dazzling blazer catching every flicker of light.
“Welcome to trivia night, the best night of the week, if I do say so myself! You’ll see on the table the trivia sheet for your answers.
As I read out the questions, you’ll get two minutes of discussion time before you need to lodge your answer.
At the end of all the questions, you’ll swap with the table on your right for marking. ”
They sucked in a dramatic breath before huskily whispering, “Are we ready?”
Loud cheers echoed around the room, and Dove let out a little wolf whistle.
“First category is movie quotes. Let’s see how cultured you lot really are!”
Okay... this could go well, I thought. I mean, all I’d done was grow up watching movies. Movies were good. I knew movies. What else had I really had to do with my time when I was sick but read books and watch films?
“Our time to shine, Ellis,” Dove said with a laugh, nudging me slightly.
I couldn’t help the small smile that reluctantly slipped onto my face.
Maybe this wouldn’t be a disaster after all.
This was a total disaster.
I couldn’t quite put my finger on which part was worse right now. I was feeling too many emotions. Siena was smiling at Dove like she wanted to eat her alive, and Jules kept leaning over the table toward me, laughing a little too hard at my answers, which weren’t even funny.
I wasn’t trying to be funny.
I was trying to win.
Dove leaned in as Siena said something that made her laugh—a real Dove laugh, all bright-eyed and relaxed, and something horrible twisted behind my ribs as I watched the twinkle in Siena’s eyes while she sipped her cocktail.
I couldn’t tell if Dove was just being Dove, that friendly, warm, magnetic person she was, but the way Siena was looking at her had my stomach twisting up so painfully it hurt.
And among all that, Liv had decided to grace us once more with her presence, throwing out stupid answers—loudly—to the questions the host called out.
Not that anyone besides me or Dove could hear her.
“What is the capital of Australia?” the host called from the stage. “And it’s not Sydney, people.”
“Outback Steakhouse!” Liv shouted grandly, clapping her hands on the table so hard my ears rang and my eye twitched.
Dove’s knee suddenly nudged against mine under the table, and she looked at me with a small grin. “Relax,” she breathed, her favorite word to say to me tonight.
I could relax. I could be… not tense. I wasn’t tense. I was fine. Everything was fine.
Jules twirled a strand of her hair around her finger, smiling at me like I was her planned dessert, and I stiffened, scratching the back of my neck awkwardly and looking back down at the sheet of paper.
My handwriting had become increasingly aggressive as the night wore on.
“What is the tallest mountain in the world?” the host asked, flourishing a glittering card.
“Your mom!” Liv hollered, dissolving into a fit of laughter and clapping me so violently on the back I nearly fell off my stool.
“Whoa!” Jules gasped, leaning out as if to catch me. I steadied myself quickly.
“You okay?”
“I’m fine,” I said quickly, trying to ignore the heat rising in my cheeks as Liv cackled. “Forgot the seat didn’t have a back.”
Across the table, Siena giggled and flicked a half-folded napkin at Dove, who swatted it away with a snort.
I wanted to toss the trivia sheet and pen across the bar. Instead, my knuckles went white from the death grip I had on them.
“Mount Everest,” Dove said, throwing a careless arm over my shoulder. “Focus, Ellis.”
God, did my heart stumble in my chest or what?
Liv shot me a look from where she now stood between Jules and Siena.
I scribbled down the answer.
“You’re super competitive, hey?” Jules said, her voice teasing.
I jerked my head up with a frown. “No.”
She shot a look at the pen I was white-knuckle gripping. “Uh-huh.”
The following questions seemed to blur together, and it wasn’t because I wasn’t paying attention. I was. Someone had to steer this train wreck of a team, obviously. Siena and Jules were getting more and more buzzed across from us, and Dove’s answers weren’t hitting the mark often.
No, they blurred together because I was focusing on stupid little things.
Not enough to neglect writing down the right answer, but enough to sidetrack me.
For instance, the way Dove’s hair spilled over her shoulders, shifting whenever she laughed.
The way she drummed her fingers absently against the tabletop as she thought through a question, yelling out wrong answers confidently, glancing at me hopefully.
Or the way Siena kept looking at her with this open, interested expression, the same look Jules was shooting across the table at me.
God, what was wrong with me?
Dove could talk to other girls. She could flirt with other girls. We weren’t anything. I had zero right to feel any type of way about it, and even if I did (which I didn’t), this wasn’t the time or place to turn into some jealous freak.
We still had the entire trip ahead of us.
“You’re spiraling, Ellis,” Liv whispered in my ear, suddenly appearing beside me, away from Dove. “You’re making it very obvious.”
Shut up, I chanted in my mind. Shut up, shut up, shut up.
Liv poked my ribs before shouting something absurd as an answer to the host’s next question, and I blinked. I’d missed it. What had they even asked?
Somewhere deep in my chest, there was this splintering feeling under the weight of too much going on. I just needed to get a grip. To act like someone my age would act. But how? I’d never been very good at that. I needed—
“Want to come to the bar with me for a top-up?” Jules asked, appearing beside me, her hand brushing my elbow in a way that made my spine go ramrod straight.
I shot to my feet so fast the stool scraped loudly against the floor.
Everyone looked at me. Dove’s brow furrowed.
“I… uh, bathroom,” I blurted.
Without waiting for an answer—or any offers to go with me—I made a beeline for the glowing bathroom sign. It practically pulsed like an escape route.
I ignored Liv’s cackles behind me.