Chapter 24 Dove #2
“Drama class,” Liv continued. “Ryan always gunned for the lead in everything, of course. Kyle was a loser jock that Ryan was tutoring. They spent like the entire year being complete assholes to each other. Then prom season rolled around, and Ryan practically dared Kyle to kiss him.”
A smile tugged at Ellis’s lips as she put her phone away and turned in her seat to face Liv.
“They were together from that kiss on. Kyle copped some heat from the team, but people got over it quick enough.” Liv grinned at Ellis, her voice softer than I was used to.
She wasn’t sharing cryptic soundbites now.
She wasn’t glossing over her life with humour or quips. She was sharing actual memories.
Memories about people she loved.
“Jedd and I weren’t very cutesy or romantic,” Liv went on.
“We were more this easy, casual mess. Comfortable. We kind of just started hooking up, and then we were together. I mean, he knew I was planning on leaving with Bri—we just didn’t talk about it.
It—it wasn’t like we didn’t care, we just didn’t do things like that.
We didn’t have conversations about what we were or throw expectations onto each other.
Sometimes… sometimes I wonder what would’ve happened the day I left with Bri.
Would he have come to see me off? Would we have kissed?
Would we have just said ‘see you soon,’ like a pair of liars? ”
Ellis frowned slightly. “Do you think he’s going to freak out when we roll up on his doorstep? Or even believe us? What are we going to say?”
Liv waved a dismissive hand. “Nah, he’s too chill. Just tell him the truth.”
Ellis shot me a look.
“I’m serious,” Liv said with a laugh. “Look, tell him the truth, and I can give you something super personal about him—something no one else knows—and he’ll believe you.
Plus, he sort of knows you. I mean, he responded to Dove’s message.
Jedd is very open-minded. It’s why we’re going to him first. Also, we need him to sort the ashes out with the fireworks. ”
“So are we scattering before we find your mom?” I asked, trying to keep my voice light as I thought about just how close I was to scattering the last of Margaret into the Pacific Ocean.
I pushed down the emotion.
Ellis’s hand landed on my knee.
“We are definitely scattering before we see my mom,” Liv said firmly. “I’m not missing that. Plus, Jedd has a boat.”
“How are you feeling?” Ellis asked her. “I mean, really…?”
Liv shrugged and tugged at a sequin. “Well, I’m already dead. I just…. won’t be here. Or maybe I will—who knows. I’m done trying to understand how the afterlife works. I just… I hope that whatever we do, I hope this trip undoes whatever tied me to you.
“I’m not… ” She let out a sigh. “I’m not mad at you anymore, Ellis. Plus, I don’t think you’re going to be able to go back to whatever borefest you were living before all this.”
Ellis rolled her eyes, but a soft smile tugged at her lips as she glanced at me.
“No,” she said, turning back to Liv. “No, I don’t think I’ll be able to either.”
“I don’t think this is safe,” Ellis said about an hour and a half into her leg of the drive.
It was around 8:00 p.m. now, and her lips were pressed thin.
“I don’t think we’re going to be able to do this in shifts.
By the time we get to Santa Monica, it’ll be late, and we’re driving desert roads in a vintage Mustang. ”
I had already been thinking the same thing, and relief filled me as she spoke.
“I know you’re desperate to get home, Liv—”
Liv cut her off. “It’s fine. You guys need to rest, I get it. It’s probably better if you get a motel and sleep. It’s okay.”
Ellis looked guilty as she rubbed her face, driving slow and cautious as she navigated the dark road.
“We’re just about to pass through Golden Shores,” she said softly.
“We’re still in Arizona, but like, right on the border.
We can get some rest and then travel safely to Santa Monica tomorrow, during the day.
It—it might be less of a shock showing up on Jedd’s doorstep mid-morning rather than in the middle of the night. ”
Liv sighed, but a grin tugged at her lips. “There goes my grand entrance.”
“Yeah, I don’t think you’re going to lose the entrance bit,” I told her with a laugh. “You’re still a ghost. Any entrance you make is going to be grand.”
The woman at the front desk of the first motel we pulled into looked like she had stepped out of a 1960s sitcom—wearing a ratty pink nightgown, hair in curlers, a cigarette dangling from her lips, and zero patience as she tossed us a room key, as if our arrival had personally offended her.
As soon as Ellis caught the key, the woman turned back to the tiny TV behind the desk, a wet cough rumbling up her throat, ash flying onto the counter.
Ellis grimaced and dragged me out of the office.
“I’m too amped up to be cooped up in a motel room,” Liv said as we stepped outside. “I’m going to walk around a bit. I’ll see you guys in the morning.”
She was gone before we could say anything, fading into the shadows of the dimly lit motel grounds.
“I’m bummed we couldn’t keep going for her,” I said as we walked to our room, the key jingling in Ellis’s hand. “But it just wasn’t safe. We were kidding ourselves to think it was a good idea.”
“I know,” Ellis murmured, pausing in front of a pale blue door with the number ten on it. “I feel bad,” she said, sticking the key in and twisting the lock. The door swung open, and we stepped inside, stale air hitting us both as we entered.
The room wasn’t terrible. I mean, the smell of smoke clung to the walls, and I wasn’t sure if the yellow paint was intentional or just the result of years of nicotine stains. The carpet looked clean, but like every motel before it, there was no way in hell I’d walk on it barefoot.
I eyed the queen bed, the rickety-looking chair in the corner, and the small bathroom that looked about the size of a closet. The scent of some kind of air freshener lingered in the air—a vain attempt to mask the cigarette smell.
Ellis set her bag down on the bed, along with the snacks and water. She let out a small yawn, ran a hand through her auburn hair, then turned to face me with a tired smile.
“I am so tired,” she said. “I think it’s all just hitting me now. Everything. Liv finally telling us the truth… her story. I can’t believe she’s been sitting on that all this time. No wonder she lost it last night.”
“I know,” I said, feeling a weight settle on my shoulders. “Honestly, I feel guilty.”
Ellis cocked her head. “Why?”
“What if the reading pushed her too far?” I said, the words tumbling out after rolling around in my head all afternoon. “What if I nudged something I shouldn’t have?”
Ellis shook her head with a small frown and took my hands in hers. The warmth grounded me, and I met her eyes.
“All you did was tell her what the cards meant, Dove,” she said, her voice soft, her eyes holding mine in that entrancing way. “How she interpreted them to match what she was already going through… that’s all her. You didn’t know any of that other stuff.”
She sounded like Margaret.
Then she surprised me.
She leaned forward and pressed a brief kiss to my lips, pulling back before I could even register the action. A shy smile followed.
“I’m going to shower,” she said, turning to face her bag. “When we get to L.A., we need to do washing. I have, like, two pairs of underwear left, and I’ve worn everything now at least once.”
“We will definitely do that,” I assured her, watching as she grabbed what she needed.
She gave me a quick smile before darting off to the bathroom and closing the door behind her.
I took a breath and flopped down onto the bed, wincing at the firmness.
I rubbed my eyes, my head heavy as I replayed the day—from the moment I’d woken up with Ellis pinned beneath me while I kissed her senseless, to Liv’s revelation just hours ago.
This trip hadn’t been short on moments that made my head spin, but today had been a doozy.
I eyed my bag at the foot of the bed, knowing Margaret’s remaining ashes sat tucked away inside. I bit the inside of my cheek as my eyes watered and I stared up at the ceiling.
The end was so close now.
She’d truly be gone.
“I hope you enjoyed it,” I murmured, as if she were sitting with me. “I hope it was a fun last ride.”
Ellis shifted beside me in the bed, the blankets pulled up to her chin as she faced me. The sheets felt clean, which was a relief, but who knew? Either way, the options were limited, floor or bed. And the bed was likely the safer bet.
“How are you feeling?” she asked, her soft voice cutting into the silence of the room. “About scattering Margaret’s ashes? Or should I say, uh, launching them.”
I kept my eyes on the ceiling.
“I don’t know,” I told her truthfully. “I feel… weird. I mean, it’s been fun—from the moment I stole them to leaving her in every state we’ve passed through. She would’ve loved it. But… this is kind of different now. It’s all of her, you know? No little pieces left over. Just gone.”
Ellis shifted again, and I felt her hand rest on my stomach, warm even through my shirt.
“You could keep a little.”
I shook my head firmly and swallowed. “No. I can’t. She wouldn’t want that.”
Silence found us once more as Ellis mulled over my words and my eyes traced the crack of light sneaking in through the gap in the curtains, my mind full of nothing and everything all at once.
“She’ll always be with you in some way,” Ellis said gently. “In the shop. Your apartment. The cards. Her essence will always be there. Maybe letting go physically will suck, but you’ve done everything she wanted. Fulfilled her final wishes with flair. She’s always going to be with you.”
A smile tugged at my lips, and my heart squeezed at her soft, shy attempt to make me feel better—saying all the right things in that quiet, unsure way that she did.