Chapter 1 #3
“Watch my nails! I just got them done today.” Stretching his arms out, he waggles his finger tips and golden glitter adorns both hands.
“Pretty. What's the occasion?” I ask, aware that I’ve been waiting any day now for either himself or his boyfriend Merle, to announce the grand opening of their new business venture.
Nightingale Hotel, a countryside retreat with event spacing too.
It's the reason he doesn't live in my building anymore, but it's only thirty minutes outside of York which makes the separation feel a little less brutal.
Meeting him may have been the best thing to happen to Phin, where he's an outgoing Ying, Merle is his steady, grounding Yang. He's a great friend, but it feels like months since we spent any quality time together, or that I didn't feel like the third wheel since my break up.
“I have a big surprise for you, but you need to get off me first.”
I snuggle closer to him, gripping tighter. “No. I need more physical contact. I feel like a starving newborn.”
Laughing he manages to wriggle his arms into the tickle spot under my armpits and I yelp, falling back into the corner of the sofa.
“You call me feral? Here,” he digs into the back pocket of his shorts, bringing out a crimson envelope that has my name written in messy handwriting.
“Before you object, know that it would mean the world to us if you came. It is our opening weekend for the hotel.”
I want to question what he means, but my mouth isn't quite working. Instead all I can do is stare at the envelope, the handwriting may as well be written in blood. It burns into my system, panic flooding my body and Phin notices me locking up.
“Hey, hey, it's ok. It's just an invitation.”
Still eyeing it with suspicion, I slowly take it from his outstretched hand and decide ripping into the thing will be better than letting my worries fester.
I'd know that unreadable cursive anywhere and even my comfort show playing in the background couldn't calm my nerves at receiving anything from my ex boyfriend. Phin and Lily’s older brother.
A PARTY TO DIE FOR!
You are invited by Corbin Claythorne, to attend a themed murder mystery.
Hosted at The Nightingale Hotel & Events Venue.
Theme to be revealed upon arrival – costumes provided.
Clearing my throat, I try to act nonchalant, placing it down in my lap. “When?”
“This Friday. I'm going back to the hotel tomorrow to help with setting up, but I'll come back and pick you up that morning.
I know you never want to see him again, and there will be a whole group there so you won't see him at all. I'll make sure of it. Apart from the party, you know that the arsehole won’t be around us.”
Despite knowing all three of them since birth, I didn’t grow up alongside the eldest. There was a big gap in age which meant Corbin was always just out of reach.
Each school we went to, he went on to the next.
If we played in the garden, he was inside with older friends.
He didn’t even sit down for meals with us, already a late teenager.
He was going out to parties whilst we had only just started secondary school.
Once he’d left for university, I hadn’t seen him again, until he walked into Betty’s tea rooms in a navy tailored suit, just over two years ago.
Phin had begged me to go with him, knowing his brother would spend most of the time berating him about over-spending, not living in London and whatever else bothered him that day.
Later I’d gotten a text from an unknown number, asking me out for a drink and I’d thought fuck it.
Phoenix had Merle, it was time I too found a love to grow.
There is where the rose coloured world of our relationship was created.
The absence of Corbin in my childhood meant he was practically a stranger to me.
A familiar stranger that was showing me a scrap of attention.
I didn’t realise how desperate I had been for a shred of affection.
I wanted someone who would look at me like starlight shone from my skin.
I wanted someone who saw me as vibrant colours that lit up their life, encasing us in a world that was dismal grey without each other. The writer in me wanted magic.
I was so desperate to find love for myself, that now all I feel is crippling shame in how emotionally bruised he’d left me.
I never told Phin about the emotional manipulation, the gaslighting or how all the mental gymnastics had left me feeling insane sometimes.
I knew he'd kill him. All he knew was that his brother cheated our entire relationship and I left him. For the last six months I’d doubled up on sessions with my therapist, but recently she'd brought up Mum and this wretched fucking day, so I was thinking of finding someone else.
New trauma I could disassociate from enough to speak about—hell I could even dazzle her with my inappropriate humour, but not old trauma. No. Talking about Mum was a hard limit.
Squeezing my shoulder, Phoenix shifts closer and pulls me into him so my head rests tucked under his chin.
He smells like cinnamon and peaches, a comfort combination because it's also the same body spray I use.
“You can bring your own beer?” He strokes my hair, playing with one of my curls that has turned golden from the sun.
Even stuck with my inner turmoil, he always makes me laugh. “You're opening a hotel and you want me to bring my own alcohol? That's a joke.”
“It is, but I thought I needed to lighten the mood. Not one person will be happy to spend one minute in Corbin’s company, so if I need to make you laugh all weekend I will.”
Tucking my legs under me, I snuggle in closer to him and watch as Miss Marple gets to work solving murder.
“You're a great best friend you know.” I'm suddenly exhausted, both my heart and eyes heavy from how long today has felt.
My disgust for him aside, Corbin's clearly hosting a party he has no taste for on the one weekend that is meant to be solely dedicated to his brother and boyfriend.
This is meant to be about Phin and Merle, and celebrating their brand new venture opening a hotel.
“A murder mystery isn't even his thing.” My voice is hoarse, a tear drop rolling down my nose. I don't remind him of how I practically begged Corbin to let me throw a murder mystery party for new years eve. I had just signed with my agent, ready to start editing my manuscript and thought it would have been perfect to host a murder mystery. I would have revealed at the end that I was publishing my debut detective novel. Hinting at the theme of the book, with the evening's game. His laugh had been cruel, like I should have been embarrassed for suggesting something so childish. Instead of celebrating that night, I’d faked a migraine and gotten the train back to York. He hadn’t even looked away from his phone, just lifted his fingers in a quick dismissal and I’d cried the entire journey home.
Even with my best friend cradling my head, I feel just as lonely right now.
“It's super last minute, don't you think?” I mumble, Miss Marple blurring as she examines a crucial piece of evidence.
He starts to rub my back, settling into the sofa whilst he helps himself to my biscuits which are definitely not vegan.
“Yeah he only emailed Merle last week. He won't even answer my calls, the dickhead.” I guess with Phin giving me the invitation in person, there's no excuse I can come up with to get out of this.
I want to support him, but I also think this weekend will go terribly wrong.
I want to protest, ask more questions—beg him to refuse his brother, but my eyes have closed and I sink into the comfort he always brings me.
Mumbling again, he adjusts my pillow, the soothing circles on my back drags me deeper into unconsciousness.
Before I fully fall asleep, I hear him whispering to the one person I miss the most in this world.
“I’ve got our girl, Nia. She'll be ok.”
For my best friend, I'll go against all my instincts and attend this weekend. I'll protect him from anything, including his own brother if I have to.