Chapter 7 #2
“The Witch King is more important.” She looks at both tables, determination in her eyes.
“It’s better to sneak in and out of the castle, get the information, and then try to get rid of our main foe.
After that, we deal with Zorwal. And if his magic is connected in any way with the Witch King, he’ll be weaker. ”
I run my fingers over the back of her hand, thankful for her suggestion, for her cool head and wise words, even if part of me wants to rush to the Shadow Lands and end this once and for all.
“Let’s plan, then,” I say, for once feeling confident that we have a chance, even if I hate waiting, hate postponing going to the Shadow Lands.
Renel presses his lips together. “I still think I should come with you.”
“Not a chance. But if you want to help, tell me where I can find those books.”
He blinks. “As you wish, Your Majesty.”
Azur sniggers at his table, and I glare at him. “What’s so funny?”
He stares at the tip of his gloves again, full of his pompous air. “Everything’s a disaster and my days are numbered. Can’t I at least laugh?”
“Right.”
I’m starting to wonder why Astra saved Azur, when he adds, “Lidiane shouldn’t go.”
She turns to him, “And you should be dead, if it depended on your wishes. Dead people give no orders.”
He runs a gloved finger through his hair. “Not an order, just… Zorwal’s dangerous.”
“I’m aware of that,” Lidiane says. “It’s why we’ll do it right.” She then turns to Renel. “I mean, let’s just ignore that we spent an hour in that castle with nobody to stop us. Oh, if only someone would have told his brother about that box!”
Renel blinks. “It didn’t cross my mind. Truly didn’t.”
He sounds regretful, but I don’t buy his remorse. I’m sure he would want to make a deal to reveal those journals, that he’d do anything to cling to any remaining shred of power if he could. At least I’m glad he’s finally doing the right thing. I just wish it didn’t have to be his last resort.
I take a deep breath as I feel Astra’s hand in mine and meet her lovely brown eyes. This is not the time to linger on bitterness, but to plan.
I turn to my brother. “Now’s your chance to redeem yourself.”
He sighs. “I seek no redemption—but I’ll do what I can to help you.”
“Good enough,” Lidiane says, as if to end the argument. “Let’s plan.”
A chill runs down my spine as I consider what I might have to do, what kind of magic I’ll need to conjure, but then I tell myself to focus on getting to the castle, on getting those answers.
One thing at a time.
LIDIANE
It’s ironic that we have to prepare to infiltrate a castle where we were not even ten hours ago. True that if we can find information that will help us, it will be worth it, and yet why couldn’t Renel have told us about it before?
Still, I trust my glamour to get us in and out undetected.
My capes can make someone unnoticeable, but they’re unfortunately left behind in the castle, and at this point it’s easier to create new ones, except that I won’t have time to do that now.
We’d better leave soon, so all I’ll use is my normal magic—and it should suffice.
Azur went outside to avoid listening to our plans, getting more and more paranoid that the Witch King will find him, afraid of unwittingly betraying us.
I understand his fear.
To be fair, there’s a layer of panic that won’t leave my body or stop disturbing my thoughts, such a paralyzing panic that I keep shoving it aside.
It’s unfair that I should meet my soulmate only to risk losing him in a few days, unfair to see his life and will slipping away from him as he waits for his end, when we never had any time to even get to know each other.
All I have were the few seconds when we stared down at the Jewel, when for the first time I felt that someone truly understood me.
While Marlak talks to his brother, I step outside to find my grumpy soulmate sitting on a rock, staring at the mountains surrounding us. The Endless Mountains. Is anything ever endless?
“Renel only shared the location of the books,” I say as I approach Azur cautiously. “And then we made a normal plan. No big secrets.”
He turns to me, his blue eyes reflecting the sky. “Still. Better this way.” He sounds as if his voice is struggling to come out of a closed throat.
I want to say something to cheer him up, perhaps cheer me up too, and I also want to sit, but there’s no rock or branch close to him. I say, “You know that once the Witch King dies, your ties to him will be broken, right? So there’s no need to despair.”
Azur looks down, frowning, then looks at the river, removes one of his gloves, and turns to me, showing his bare hand.
I flinch, unable to accept what I’m seeing, as the nymph’s words echo in my mind, now eerie and scary.
Pay attention to his hands. Once they’re completely white, he’s gone.
It’s not only the tips of his fingers that are white like milk, it’s the entire fingers, the white almost bleeding to his palm. If it keeps going like that, how long does he have? Two, three days at most? My entire body trembles, shook by my horrifying dread.
And yet I choose not to voice my fear. “We don’t know if the spread is constant. What if it slows down? The healer said one or two weeks.”
He stares at his hand and tilts his head. “Who knows?”
I sit cross-legged on a path of grass beside him. “There’s time. And we’re on the move. You can’t simply accept defeat.”
He blinks slowly, then focuses his eyes on me. “I don’t know how to feel. Don’t know what to do, or what I can even do that won’t put anyone in even more danger.”
I decide to let go of the words that had been constricting my chest. “I was furious when I read your note. How can you give your life away so easily? Why would you tell me that you were letting the Witch King kill you? Live a happy life without me. I’d love you until eternity. Why would you write that?”
He takes a deep breath. “I didn’t want you to think I didn’t care about you. As to the sacrifice, it wasn’t an easy decision, if it helps, but—”
I get up, annoyed and so angry, wishing I could shake him long enough to bring some sense to his mind, but I can’t even touch him.
“No buts. You think you want a sacrifice? You think it’s selfless?
It’s not. You sacrifice yourself, then leave us all to deal with the outcome, to work out on our own. It’s selfish. Coward.”
He exhales sharply. “The alternative was to let the Witch King absorb my power.”
“No. The alternative was to find a way to escape and not let him use you.”
“I didn’t know there was a way.”
“Because you didn’t even allow the possibility to cross your mind, didn’t try to come up with a solution that didn’t involve your death.”
His chuckle is dry and bitter. “You have no idea what went through my mind.”
“You quit too easily, Azur. It’s clear there’s nothing binding you to this world.”
He narrows his eyes. “You judge too harshly. I told you I’d love you if I could, told you I’d court you, when I thought I was free. I can’t help the way things turned out.”
“Imaginary, potential love is easy, beautiful. Real love is complicated. I don’t know if you want that.”
He stares at his hand again and puts the glove back on. “I want to survive, but if I have to go, I don’t want to leave any scars, don’t want any tears. Most of all, I don’t want to become the Witch King’s tool.”
“If everything goes well, we won’t let it happen.”
“I hope so.” He stares at me more carefully. “Is there any way you can avoid going to the castle?”
“They’ll need my magic.”
He watches me for a moment, then says, “Let Astra taste your blood. She could protect her husband.”
“Astra’s staying on this island. Do you want the Witch King to find her? And Tiurian magic can be traced.”
Azur looks away and inhales a sharp breath. “It’s agonizing. Seeing you risking your life like that.”
“Don’t be dramatic. You’re acting as if getting into that castle is going to be some epic expedition. It’s not. You know my magic. And stop with the self commiseration. We’ll…” I meant to say fix this, but the words won’t come. “Do our best.”
He nods, the gesture oddly sweet. “I know. Don’t think for a second I don’t believe in your magic. Your power is nothing short of wondrous. Also, I’m sorry. I’m trying to keep you from getting hurt, and somehow it only makes things worse.”
“Just don’t throw your life away, that’s all. I don’t want any bold sacrifice. I want you to survive this, and we’ll fight until the very last second, if it comes to that, to get rid of this poisoning. So don’t give up, it’s all I’m asking. Be grumpy all you want.”
He narrows his eyes, and I’m not sure if his tone is playful. “You think I’m grumpy?”
Had the situation been just a little lighter, I’d laugh. “How else would you describe your personality?”
“Enigmatic and intense?” His chuckle is sad and wrong. “I’ve been bound for so long that I don’t even know. All I’ve known was to hide myself, and now I fear it might have been hidden too deep, and yet when I look at you, I think I can find it.”
When he talks to me like that, I feel as if I’ve known him since forever. Perhaps I have, even if he’s still almost a stranger.
I want to stroke his hair, touch his face, hold his hand, but all of that would be too risky.
“I’ll see you soon,” I say, my words hard and emotionless.
He nods, then runs his hand through his glamour hat and gives me a genuine smile. “Thanks for this.”
“It’s just a glamour.”
He shakes his head quickly, his long hair flapping with the movement. “No. It means you see me.”
“Impossible not to see you, Azur.”
His smile broadens before he gets serious again. “Be careful and come back, Lidiane.”
“Again, don’t be dramatic. We’re just going to the Crystal Castle.”
We’re just going to pick up some journals. We’ll be in and out. What could happen?
RENEL