Chapter 12 #2
A chill takes over my entire body. Whatever he’s planning, it can only be something absolutely dreadful. A few quips cross my mind, such as “glad to help”, but the remaining bit of prudence left in me is telling me that it’s better to remain silent.
He narrows his eyes. “Who told you to come here?”
Now this is a question that deserves a reply. And I need to make a quick choice on whether to implicate Mirella or not. I choose to lie. “I saw Otavio and I thought he came because of me. A foolish presumption, obviously. And silly curiosity. Apologies. I meant no offense. It won’t happen again.”
“That much is obvious. Now, how did you know? About this passage?”
“Renel showed it to me.” This is a more plausible explanation than claiming I found it by accident or something, and for now, I’d rather not cross Mirella. I don’t need any more enemies.
“Oh, did he? And that made you think you could spy on me?” His tone is light, but he still has that satisfied tone that makes me more worried than if he shouted.
“No. I… was just curious.” There isn’t much I can say or do.
“And yet you broke my trust. You broke our deal. Do you know what that means?”
“I’m not sure.” My body wants to tremble, and yet I will it to stay still.
Without turning around, he retreats in the hallway and says, “Follow me.”
I freeze. For a second, I want to stay here, as if this passage would keep me safe, as if it would keep me out of Zorwal’s reach. Of course, hiding is not a solution, and if I’m to face any torment, delaying it won’t lessen it.
With calm steps, I follow the creepy old fae out of this hideaway, my heart pounding in my chest. When we reach the hallway of the castle, he steps aside, so that I come out in front of him, then he turns me around and grasps my arms, then whispers in my ear. “Now I can harm you.”
I’m not so sure that’s how our deal works, but it’s not like I can ask for clarifications now. I assume I could also harm him, if I ever figured out how to kill him, of course.
“Guards,” he calls. “Take her to the special prison.”
I hope he means special in the sense that it’s for super important prisoners, that it’s a prison with a lovely bed and beautiful windows.
Nah. I know I’m screwed.
AZUR
My goal was to give myself one day to live as if I had no curse upon me. One day, as if doom was not closing in on us, as if my end wasn’t hovering above me.
And yet sitting with Lidiane, talking about silly and important things, sharing memories and wishes, makes me want to live, to survive. I could become a desperate fool, ready to risk the world for another day like this, sitting by the water, hearing her voice.
She told me some of her childhood, I told her some of mine—and yet still part of me remains hidden, as I’m not ready to reveal my origin to her.
I should tell her everything, tell her I’m the legitimate Nether Court king, and yet I don’t want to mention my promise to destroy the Crystal Court, a vow passed through generations and generations.
I don’t want her to think I have some nefarious goal.
While I might have wanted to see Marlak dead, right now, I’d rather see him alive and destroying the Witch King.
We can resolve our differences later—if ever there is such a thing as later.
Perhaps I don’t want to risk having Lidiane looking at me differently, breaking the enchantment of this moment.
Astra knows who I am—but she won’t tell anyone.
How can I place so much trust on my nemesis’ wife?
Or perhaps former nemesis’ wife? We faced death together.
I shared my blood with her. I just know she won’t betray me unless she has no other choice, and hopefully, she’ll never have to make that choice.
Lidiane watches me, eyes wide. “Shall we go inside?”
“When we could watch the stars rising over the Endless Mountains?”
Her smile is sweet and makes my chest ache.
“The Mountains won’t move. And the stars will be here tomorrow.
” We both know I might not be here tomorrow, and yet we can never manage to poke this horrible truth.
“But I think… I’ll make new capes. We might need to go somewhere and not draw attention.
And we might want to eat.” She gets up, as if she’s made up her mind.
I don’t want to step away from this corner of the island, this little sanctuary, and yet I get up. “Well, let’s go. But I still don’t want to hear any secret conversation.”
“We might need you.”
I shake my head. “If… If the Witch King takes me again, and if my mind is taken…”
“We’ll prevent it.”
She’s standing so close to me, watching me with that foolish hope in her eyes. For a second, I want to forget everything and kiss her. I shut my eyes and bury my feelings. What a stupid second.
I look at the mountains again, framed by a darkening sky, and keep my voice flat. “Let’s go, then.”
The eerie whiteness now covers over half of my hands, and even with Astra’s magic, I don’t know if I’ll survive long enough to find out whether killing the Witch King will save me.
The worst is that I can’t even spend what might be my last night with Lidiane.
It would be too risky to share a room, too risky to be near her when sleep could take over my senses and my caution.
It would be a matter of seconds for my mind to slip, for my skin to touch hers, for me to damn her. And that won’t happen.
“Are you upset?” she asks.
What do you think? is what I would normally reply, but I manage a smile. “Not at you.”
“You’ll survive, Azur. Have some hope.”
“I’m here. Still alive. Of course there’s hope.”
Too thin for my taste, but it’s here—foolish hope. I just won’t let it blind me.
TARLIA
Zorwal can harm me. The thought keeps echoing in my head. I thought it was clear that I wouldn’t be harmed when I made the deal, and yet I’m not sure how it was invalidated. Was it because I disobeyed him? Betrayed him, perhaps?
And yet he left me here alone, in a windowless cell with moldy walls, a stinky, stained straw mattress, and an empty pail. The door has iron bars and a lock that can’t be opened from the inside.
I’m sitting on the cold floor, unwilling to touch the mattress, aware that at some point I’ll want to sleep, and that I might have to lay on that stinky thing.
We’re a few levels below the main floor of the castle, and, while there are more cells here, they’re all empty.
I regret not trying to run when the two guards brought me here.
My thinking at the time was that more guards would end up catching me, and then it would only make things worse.
The question is: worse than what? I don’t know what Zorwal has planned for me, and I don’t think I can escape this cell. Worse, I need to tell someone that he and Otavio are connected, and I don’t know how I’m going to do it.
Mirella? As if I could even trust her. I could have told Zorwal that she was the one who asked me to spy on him, but I don’t think that would have made my life any easier.
As it is, she still wants to know what Zorwal and the mysterious visitor discussed, and I’m hoping she’ll show up to ask.
That might be my only key out of here—if she shows up. If I can make a deal with her.
Steps echo in the empty hall and I get up even if I’m dreading whoever is coming. It could be a guard bringing food or at least some water, but I know that’s not the case.
Through the bars, I see Zorwal approaching, and behind him, none other than Mirella. I’m starting to think she’s not going to save me.
She looks surprised when she sees me, and turns to Zorwal. “Did something happen?”
“What do you think?” he asks.
She frowns and looks like a child deep in thought, trying to find the right answer. For a second, she reminds me of Astra. Then she says, “She wouldn’t be able to defy you, I don’t think. Not with your deal. Or did she end up doing—”
“I want a clear answer,” Zorwal interrupts her. “What did she do?”
“She wasn’t in my bedroom. Was she somewhere she shouldn’t be? Doing something she shouldn’t do?” Mirella’s fake innocence is annoying, even if I understand why she’s deceiving him. Perhaps part of me wished she would protect me, but that’s a nonsensical thought.
Zorwal doesn’t move his eyes from her, as if trying to decipher her thoughts, and asks,“Did you happen to show her any secret passage?”
“No. Is that what she did? Go where she shouldn’t?” Mirella looks puzzled.
He blinks, then asks, “Did you tell her about any secret passage?”
“No.” Her voice is firm, certain.
And it’s true that she never told me about any secret passage. She asked me about it. Sneaky.
Zorwal turns to me, his stare heavy and hard. “Did Mirella suggest that you should spy on me? This could be your chance to leave this dreadful cell. Perhaps drink some water.”
Could be. I’m not sure what kind of idiot he thinks I am.
I shrug. “I can lie. I could tell you anything you want to gain my freedom, but it doesn’t mean—”
“Answer my question.” Zorwal’s stare turns into an icy glare.
I avoid even glancing in Mirella’s direction, as that could make him suspicious, and say, “She didn’t.
I was out in the castle, saw Otavio, and wanted to know what he wanted.
” As much as I hate it, I think some pleading now would be nice.
“I meant no harm. No betrayal. I can promise never to tell anyone anything you said, not that I even understood what you discussed.”
“Quiet.” He stares at me and at Mirella, and tells her, “Go. We’ll crown you tomorrow. I’ll deal with the filthy human.”
Mirella bows, turns around, and leaves without a single look of concern.
She could be pretending, like me, and then she could be simply glad she got off easily.
Now, I don’t think she’ll come to my rescue, but maybe she’ll want to find out about the conversation I heard, and that’s when I might be able to negotiate, even if I’m not sure what.
At the same time, Zorwal might suspect her.
“How can I help you?” I ask, forcing my tone to be as snarkless as possible.
He stares at me, the corner of his mouth lifting in gleeful anticipation, a flicker of lust in his eyes.
I step back, horror taking hold of my body. If he enters this cell, I swear he’ll get beheaded again, even if it costs my life.
And yet he doesn’t move, just watches me with that odd glint in his eyes. Something makes my cheek burn. I press my fingers on my face, and feel blood—and pain. It was so sudden that I’m more surprised than anything.
My arm then feels the same, and I see a deep gash across my biceps.
It hurts, but feels unreal as if it was happening to someone else, not me.
My most immediate fear is that these cuts will turn into ugly scars.
What a silly fear. And yet Renel’s face comes to mind.
Would he still want me? Does he even want me?
Zorwal watches me, his smile fading. Figure what your enemy wants. Otavio’s words come to me in a flash. I hate that man, hate Otavio, and yet he might not be the most despicable creature alive. And even if he were, sometimes he had useful advice. What does Zorwal want?
I feel another cut on the back of my hand, then notice his disappointment—and suddenly I understand. He wants to see me suffer.
I bring my hand to the cut and yell in pain, the most horrific yell I can muster. I try to focus all my pain, hatred, fear, and anger in that yell.
“Please, stop!” I plead. “I’ll do anything.” I sound weak, pathetic, but I think that’s exactly what he wants.
I’d rather pretend I’m broken than push him into hurting me more and more until I break.
“Really? Will you promise?”
“Yes!” I rasp.
“Your promises are worthless, human. Enjoy your night with no water or food.”
He turns around and walks away, leaving me here, bleeding, hurt, hungry, thirsty. I don’t think I know what he wants. He didn’t even ask for anything.
His steps stop, then he approaches the cell again. He looks at me, then waives a hand. The pain stops. I touch my cheek again, and feel no cut.
Zorwal smirks. “Next time I might not heal them, so be careful.”
I don’t know if he wants me to beg some more, yell, or what, and either way, he leaves before I can decide what to do. I exhale in relief and collapse on the floor, my heart pounding.
If all he’s doing is torturing me for the sake of torturing me, I can’t see how to find a way out of here.
Mirella.
But I don’t know what she wants, or if she would be willing to help me. I don’t know what Zorwal wants either. I don’t know what anyone wants.
My butt starts to hurt and I decide to sit on the stinky mattress. Everything stinks anyway.
And I don’t know how I’m going to find a way out of here.