Chapter 34
thirty-four
. . .
raea
I wake up, stretching and sinking further into the silk sheets at my back with a sort of contentment I haven’t felt before, definitely not since school started.
My mind drifts back to last night, with Ryker’s mouth exploring mine, down my neck, settling over my heart.
And his confession…gods, it was so unexpected and tender, and I think it made me fall harder. It’s exactly what I needed from him.
Because that’s what’s happening, I’m falling for him.
I feel giddy as I get ready for the day, slowly showering, washing my hair twice, and then spending extra time braiding it and letting my natural waves hang loose from the ponytail.
Aolyn hums with a knowing smirk when I brush on my blush and swipe my lips with a bit of lip stain.
My bruises have mostly faded from my face, and the cuts on my hands have closed up. Now, if my torso and arms could get the memo. I look like I was beaten up from the bruises peppering my chest from where I hit the console, and the bruises on my arms—well, who knows?
“You seem chipper,” Aolyn teases as I grab my bag from my desk. I roll my eyes and give her an amused smile.
“Have a good day,” I sing back to her as I close the door behind me.
Ryker is across from me, holding out a tea, looking devilishly handsome in his athletic shorts and a backward hat I’ve never seen him in, his chest gloriously bare.
Gods, why is it so attractive? His muscled legs and arms are on full display, and the deep contours of his chest and abs are still glistening from whatever workout he just finished.
His heated gaze tracks down my body, taking in the skirt and top I chose today.
“Morning, Princess.” His voice is deep and husky, a sound that melts my insides.
I try not to look at his lips, remembering how they molded against mine, how thoroughly he claimed me last night under the moon and stars, but I fail. I can’t help it. His mouth is perfect, and for a first real kiss, well, it was out of this world. I can’t imagine it gets any better than that.
“Morning.” I flush from head to toe when I realize I’ve been staring at his mouth this whole time.
He chuckles, his mouth tilting up at the edge as he turns. Instead of leading me downstairs, I find myself at his door. With a backward glance, there’s nobody around. He opens the door and tugs me inside.
I don’t even have time to look around before I’m pinned against the door, the hard lines of his body pressed into me as his mouth moves to mine. I hold out my tea, careful not to spill it, but apparently, I’m too distracted—I hiss when a scalding splash hits my hand.
Ande—Ryker…gods, I’ve gotta get used to that—pulls away briefly, taking my tea and setting it on an end table near the door before returning to me.
With both hands free, I let my bag drop and slide my palms up the warm contours of his chest, wrapping them around his neck.
Gods, I love the feel of his heated skin on me.
My thoughts drift to what it would be like to feel his entire body pressed into me sans all clothing.
I’m knee-deep in highly inappropriate thoughts when he tilts my chin up so that I can look into his eyes. “Will you come to my game today?” he asks. He sounds confident and sure of himself, but I can see his underlying vulnerability. There’s something so sweet about Ryker being nervous.
I slide my fingers into his hair, lifting onto my toes and placing a soft kiss on his cheek. “I’d love to.”
His hands tug on my hair, tilting my head back further, fusing our mouths back together, and deepening the kiss.
Gratitude and excitement are pouring off of him in waves.
I’m already on my toes, so he’s setting the pace.
Once again, we become a frantic mess of tongues and teeth, his emotions mixing with mine, and the heat within me ignites like it’s just been lying in wait.
As if sensing where my thoughts have gone, his hands drift down to my ass again, tugging me impossibly closer until I feel how hard he is against my stomach.
A gaspy moan escapes my lips as he pulls back, his whole body taut and restrained.
“That fucking sound,” he growls.
I chuckle lightly, falling against the door for support while I breathe through the energy build-up. “Can I ask you something?” My cheeks heat, but it’s been nagging at me all night. He nods, and I continue, “Will we have sex before our Ceremony?”
I swear I watch his eyes darken exponentially as his nostrils flare, his palms coming up and planting on either side of my head.
“Do you want to have sex before our Ceremony?” he asks, his voice low, almost a whisper. My chest heaves with the air I’m attempting to inhale, but failing to do so.
“I don’t—I haven’t—” I take a deep breath, finding my courage. I’m a princess, and he’s my fated future, so I’d better learn how to talk to him. “I’ve never even kissed anyone until you,” I admit. “But this fire between us—I want you like I’ve never wanted anyone.”
His features lift with a small smirk. “Good.” He shifts, pressing his body into me again, the proof of his desire, pinning me in place against the door.
“I want all of you to myself. Every kiss, every touch, every heated moment, every gasping moan—I want them all to belong to me.” My cheeks flush as I attempt to breathe, his face so close I can feel his hot breath tickling my cheek.
“And if you ever learn to control that Bond of yours, then we can talk. I won’t push you farther than you’re ready to go. ”
“And if I want to?”
He chuckles, the sound wrapping around me. “Then who am I to deny you? Trust me, Soraea, I cannot wait to sink myself so deep in you that you forget the rest of the galaxy exists. I want to hear you screaming my name as I make you come on my cock, giving all of you over to me.”
I’m pretty sure I stop breathing as my toes curl. I’ve never heard such filthy words and been so turned on at the same time.
Ryker leans in further until his mouth brushes the shell of my ear. “When you finally give yourself to me, whether it’s before or after, I’m going to roar so loud, and mark you so thoroughly, that everyone in every corner of this system will know you belong to me.”
My head turns so that our mouths are so close, sharing the same air. “And do I?” I ask breathlessly. “Belong to you?” I swallow thickly, running my fingertips along the grooves of the door at my back. I’ve never allowed myself to be this vulnerable with anyone.
Ryker stands to his full height, making me crane my neck. “I’ve belonged to you far longer than you know, Princess.” He reaches out, brushing his thumb along my jaw. “The question only you can answer is if you’re ready to belong to me.”
“I—” His finger presses down on my lips, silencing me.
“I told you to think about it. Because when you say yes, there’s no going back, there’s no changing your mind.
I do not share, and I will not stand back silently watching as other men try to flirt with you.
You will be mine and only mine. So think about it.
” He removes his finger from my mouth as I draw in a shallow breath.
What is it that I want? If I have over a year left, am I ready to commit to Ryker? Should I be using this time to flirt and enjoy being single? Dread sinks in my stomach. I don’t know what I want. I don’t know what I’m ready for.
I do know that the idea of him taking those same luxuries has me wanting to vomit, but it would be wrong of me to ask that of him if I am not ready for that level of commitment.
It’s not that I have this sudden urge to flirt with society, but belonging to a man before The Ceremony has just never been a possibility, and right now, it’s scary as hell.
As if sensing where my mind has gone, he leans down, placing a quick but tender kiss on the tip of my nose and offering me a smile.
“There’s no rush, beautiful,” he mutters.
“C’mon, let’s get you some food.” He takes a step back, effectively releasing me, and hands me my tea.
I’m too stunned to do anything more than accept with a small smile as I follow him out, my mind still reeling.
So fast. Everything that has happened between us has been so fast. Even if we’ve known each other since we were in diapers.
Even if I know the truth of my fate. He’s right.
I need to take some time to think about it.
In the meantime, I need to take things slow with him.
I want to be sure about taking that step.
He walks at my side, slowing his steps to match mine as we make our way down the hall toward the dining hall. He remains quiet, watching me from the corner of his eye, but I hate this awkward tension between us.
“I’ll think about it.” My slippers tap on the stone floor. “You’re right. It’s a big decision, and I don’t…I mean, I haven’t even considered the possibility of being serious with someone before The Ceremony. I’ve always expected to wait for any sort of relationship until The Ceremony was complete.”
His hand brushes mine, our fingers briefly tangling, careful of watchful eyes. “Take as much time as you need. There’s no rush. Like I said,” he pauses, his voice turning to a whisper. “I’ve belonged to you far longer than you know.”
Before I can ask what he means, Ciara bounces up to my side, taking my hand and squealing about something.
Ryker’s lip tilts up slightly as he winks, then saunters away.
Ciara’s still babbling about something I’m not hearing as I watch him fill a plate of meat and eggs, his team gathering around him while most women’s eyes drift in his direction.
I can’t blame them; a shirtless Ryker with a backward hat is the best kind of innocent fantasy, but it doesn’t stop me from seeing red.
This is going to be a lot harder than I thought.