Chapter 28
Esmyra
The tide whispered at Esmyra’s heels, drawing lacey foam around her ankles as she walked the shoreline of Maerinys. Moonlight bathed the sea in a silver sheen, the wet sand cool beneath her feet. The stars above stretched infinitely across the midnight sky, and she had never felt smaller.
The vision of Naerysa’s betrayal, and of the gods demanding her father trap Kaelypso and Naerysa for them haunted her. That was why he was in the tower when Maerinys fell and how he was able to escape with her.
Did he purposefully only save Kaelypso? Did he know Naerysa was a jealous, hateful traitor?
“And a spiteful cunt,” Kaelypso added. “Don’t forget that one.”
“Aye, and that.”
Her teeth clenched as her thoughts spiraled. Kaelypso was still a separate soul from herself, but her wills were now Esmyra’s. She felt everything the goddess did. Her rage, inner turmoil… her pain. She felt their shared heart shatter at the sight of Naerysa and Irah together.
But if Esmyra could feel all that Kaelypso had, then the same must be said for Syrena and Naerysa…
Did Syrena know that Naerysa wanted Kaelypso’s lover? Wanted her power?
She bit the inside of her cheek until blood crept down her throat, her eyes widening as sickly horror crept in.
The subtle burning on her wrist was now a constant reminder of the time she was running out of.
She held her arm out as two small merlights lit just above it.
The teal light illuminated the tattoo, turning the silver of her serpent the same color.
She wrapped her fingers around the mark, her talons digging in as if she could scrape the bond away.
Even weeks after the ritual, its magic still writhed beneath her skin. She could feel it surging in her blood, in the marrow of her bones. It had settled inside her like saltwater in wounds.
My soul is bound to the one person who’s been trying to destroy me. Well, the one person who might actually succeed in it, anyway. Esmyra was starting to believe that her sister may have been her greatest threat the entire time.
Had she told the truth about Draevyn? Had he truly run from her and escaped through the caves that day, or was more at play?
“Gods, I’m such a fucking idiot,” she whispered to herself.
Even if Draevyn had been right about Syrena all along, there was nothing she could do to fix what she’d done. There would be no undoing it. She had stolen the queen of his kingdom, and she was now an enemy of the crown.
The realm would never forgive her or pardon her actions, and she didn’t blame them. Esmyra wasn’t even sure she wanted their forgiveness. She felt justified in the moment, and she would likely even do it again.
What she truly wanted was the truth, so she could put an end to this bullshit once and for all.
She closed her eyes and breathed in the night air, desperate to steady herself and stop the chaos inside her mind.
Esmyra felt their presence before she saw them.
The sea roared at her back, wind threading salt through her hair, but it was the stillness on one of the dunes that caught her attention. Two silhouettes watched her, waiting.
“Spies,” Kaelypso hissed.
Tits. She should’ve known this was coming.
Esmyra’s brows furrowed, her lip curling in irritation. “It appears Syrena already has eyes on us.”
“She likely always has.”
Her talons bit into her palms. Over her dead fucking body would she allow this.
When the guards didn’t move, she stormed toward them, up the slope of loose sand. When she reached the crest, they finally shifted, hands resting on their weapons.
“Is there a particular reason you’re watching me from a distance?” Esmyra didn’t even try to hide the viciousness from her tone.
“Orders,” one said. “We’re to ensure your safety.”
The other nodded. “The queen wants you protected.”
Esmyra’s laugh was sharp, void of any warmth or amusement. “Protected?” she echoed. “Do you really think a goddess needs protection?” She tsked.
Their silence was answer enough.
She stepped closer, and the guards tensed but held their ground.
This wasn’t meant for safety. This was a noose wrapped around her neck dressed up as concern. It was then Esmyra realized her sister’s malicious schemes were never done without calling it mercy first.
Syrena thought proximity was control, thinking Esmyra wouldn’t notice the weight of eyes on her back, even in the careful distance.
Protection wasn’t protection when it came with chains.
If Syrena wanted to see what she was capable of, Esmyra would make sure the message was delivered the only way she knew how—violently.
“If these guards are so quick to turn on one of their goddesses, then write the message to our twins with blood in the fucking sand.” Kaelypso’s words were ruthless as they echoed through her mind.
Esmyra smiled at the guards, eyes shifting. “And do you really think you’re capable of protecting me?”
A flicker of unease passed between them.
Lightning cracked from her hand before either could tighten their grip on their spears. It struck the guard closest to her, crackling blue fire racing over his armor as he convulsed and fell, body smoking against the sand.
The second guard’s jaw fell, positioning himself into a fighting stance as he aimed his weapon at her.
Her nails lengthened into talons as she drove him backward. Striking fast, she forced him down the dune in a stumbling retreat as he swung his spear wildly. Esmyra ducked and raked her claws across his chest before finishing him with a single slash across his throat.
He dropped into the sand, crimson pouring down his front as her venom mixed with his blood. The guard cried out, choking and screeching in pain as the venom ate at his ruined flesh.
Esmyra dropped down into a crouch beside him as he clutched his neck, desperate to live as his life force poured from him. Her pupils shifted, casting a teal glow on his face. “Your goddess demands silence.” As his screams fell silent, the lightning faded from her skin, her talons retracting.
“Now this should tell your queen that I don’t need a fucking leash,” she said quietly. “And I will not be caged.”
Her lip curled in disgust as the man took his last breath beneath her. Then she turned and aimed back down to the shoreline.
The water’s chill rushed around her ankles, and she sucked in a sharp breath as the chaos in her mind began screaming once more. Everything she’d learned of and witnessed in the past several hours threatened to suffocate her.
“Esmyra, we must leave,” Kaelypso urged. “Before Naerysa learns of what we know. We can make a plan once we’re safe, but we never will be if we remain in Maerinys.”
“I know,” she whispered aloud.
Tilting her face up to the sky, she searched the stars. Constellations she used to sail by twinkled above her, but there was one star in particular that caught her eye, shining brighter than the rest.
It sat almost defiantly alone within the curve of the crescent moon.
Esmyra blinked, cocking her head slightly to the side.
“Father?” she whispered, the wind sending her hair fluttering around her face. She wrapped her arms around her waist as she took in a shuddering breath.
The star winked, its brightness dimming and shining once more within seconds.
Esmyra’s lips parted as she took it in answer. “What’s happening to me?” Her voice cracked as the words left her.
She fell to her knees in the sand, the tiny waves lapping at the shore wrapping around her. It was then she realized that the salt she tasted on her lips was no longer just from the sea air as tears ran down her cheeks.
Esmyra licked her lips, and a tiny sob escaped her as she brought her gaze back to the stars.
“I don’t even know who I am anymore. For nearly a thousand years, I longed to know what I was.
Where I stemmed from. And now that I know…
I’d do anything—give anything—to take it back.
Discovering what I am cost me everything. It cost me you.”
She swallowed, trying to steady her rapid breaths. “All my life, I was worried that I was a monster. But this darkness inside of me… It wasn’t even me, or my siren… It was Kaelypso.”
“Esmi…”
She ignored the goddess and the pain in her voice.
“What if I’m just the skin she wears?” Esmyra took a few heaving breaths and then screamed to the sky, “Who the fuck would I have been without her?!”
I never even had a godsdamn chance. This life was never mine.
“I need a sign that Esmyra Blackwood isn’t lost. If I can’t be who I was… just show me how to be something good. Something that isn’t this,” she spat the last word in disgust as she gestured to herself. “Please just show me where I need to go.”
A breeze stirred her hair, and the surrounding tide pulled back. A sense of unease draped over her, her spine straightening on instinct. She felt something. It wasn’t magic, nor the sea’s usual hum, but was more the feeling of being watched.
And then something shimmered in the distance out at sea.
She pushed herself to her feet and took a step forward, the waves curling around her calves now. Out beyond the shallows, where the moonlight turned the sea to polished obsidian, the water stirred.
Esmyra’s breath caught in her throat as something breached the water.
Her eyes shifted, her new vision narrowing in on the motion to find an enormous scaled, horned head in the center of the dark expanse.
Vibrant silver eyes shone bright against its navy scales and the darkness of the night.
They locked with hers, unblinking and ancient.
She would never be able to forget those eyes even if she tried. The last time she saw them, she had been searching for Maerinys. The sea serpent Esmyra had fought in that godsforsaken trench was staring at her from across the harbor.
The beast had risen from the depths like a myth made flesh, nearly dragging her to a watery grave. The tiny hairs on the back of her neck stood at attention. Every sensible thought she had that day screamed at her to flee, to leave the water.