Chapter Twenty-Three
Nancy came downstairs, donned her light-blue Spencer, which perfectly matched her velvet reticule, and knocked on the door of her father’s study. Hearing his response, she opened the door, popped her head in, and smiled at him.
“Papa, forgive me for disturbing you. I only wish to tell you that I am going to the tea shop to make sure that all is as it should be. Our new clerk seems to have things well in hand, but I thought it could not hurt to be certain.”
“That is very good of you, Nancy, but delay your departure a moment and come in. I have something I wish to discuss with you.” Robert rose from his desk and took a seat on a small window bench, patting the needle-pointed cushion beside him to direct her to join him.
Nancy did as she was bid and sat next to her father. “Is there something amiss, Papa?”
“No, my dear, not at present. I have been thinking quite a bit about the future and, to own it, I am worried for you.”
Nancy gave a little laugh. “Why, Papa, what is giving you such concern? I am healthy, happy, and all is well with me. There can be no cause for alarm about my future. Why do you frown so?”
Robert reached out and took one of Nancy’s hands in his own.
“You may be happy now, and, indeed, I am glad to know of your cheerful nature. But I worry if it will last. I have been dwelling on the fact that you are now one and twenty, with no prospects for a husband. While I love having you living here with me, it is not the way of life for you to spend all of your time caring for your father. You should be married with a family of your own to occupy you. In the past year, two young men in our town have made their interest in a match with you quite plain, and yet, you dismissed them out of hand. Both of them are honest, hard-working men who would provide for you and with whom, I believe, you would be content. Why did you reject them before a proper suit could even begin?”
Nancy withdrew her hand from her father’s and clasped hers together in her lap. She gave her father a small smile. “Because I do not and could not love them. Anything is to be preferred rather than marrying without affection.”
“You might come to love either of the young men if you became better acquainted with them.”
Nancy gave him a rueful smile. “Father, I have lived in Doddington my entire life. I know them well enough. Freddy is an apprentice blacksmith and, indeed, he is hardworking and kind enough. Barnabus is a tenant farmer for Clayton House Estate and, while he is pleasant, he never reads and has little or no conversation in him. I could not imagine spending my life with a man who is so taciturn and lacking in things to say. You know how fond I am of lively conversation.”
“I do, and while you may be correct in your assessment of Barnabus, give a thought to Freddy, who is much more of a talker. In fact, when he came to speak to me about courting you, he was quite vocal in his admiration of you—indeed, I would say he is utterly besotted with you. Why can you not, at least, allow him to come calling? If you spend some time with him, you may see that your feelings might increase in admiration for him.”
Nancy felt tears come to her eyes. She looked at her father with a sorrowful gaze. “There is but one gentleman for me, Papa,” she whispered. “I have loved him since I was a child and I cannot see myself happy with any other.”
Robert exhaled slowly. “Gentleman. You are referring to Gilbert Kendall, of course. He is a pleasant young man, but, my darling, it is a foolish hope that you might marry into that family. We are from trade, and even though we are not so low in stature and have more than sufficient money, you well know that we cannot so readily cross into that sphere of the landed gentry. You must give up such an idea and be practical. Gilbert Kendall is not and cannot be for you.”
“But I love him, Father, and, I believe, if he were to only see me as a grown woman now, and not his childhood playmate, he would realize what a good match we are.” She brushed the tears from her eyes.
“After all, it is not as if the family estate will fall to him—Miles will gain it. Gilbert is set for the church, and therefore will not need to wed the daughter of a gentleman. The status of his bride is not so important as it would be if he were to one day inherit.”
“Even all that aside—is he not, at this very moment, in London taking part in the Season? I believe that is what I have heard. It would appear he is looking for a bride there, and not here in Doddington.”
“As a second son with no fortune to speak of, I do not expect he will make a match but only enjoy himself for a time, then return home to become curate in the parish. Despite his protestations of not taking vows, I believe he will take the position offered by his brother-in-law. Once he does, and we are in each other’s company more often, I believe our friendship might well bloom into love.
For we are meant for each other—I truly believe it, Papa. ”
“And if he does return from town with a new bride? What then? Will you then give up this foolish dream of yours to marry him and begin to look elsewhere? For, my dear girl, I should hate to see you lose your bloom and spend your life caring for me in my dotage, instead of finding happiness with a husband, children, and home of your own. Please, assure me that you will consider marrying another if Gilbert becomes unavailable.”
Nancy sighed. “I can make no such promise at this time, Papa. My heart belongs to Gilbert—for now. However, if he returns to Doddington with a fiancée, I suppose I shall have to reconcile myself to it. Whether I can open myself to a new love, I am not certain. At this point, I cannot even fathom of loving another. So, if I lose Gilbert, perhaps I am meant to remain single.”
“I only ask that you do not irrevocably shut your heart to the possibility of finding a match with another. For life is full of surprises, and you may yet see that you could be entirely happy with any number of available young men.”
Nancy exhaled slowly. Finally, she said, “Very well, Papa. I shall try to keep an open mind.”