Chapter 38
‘So where has he been?’ Fliss stood in the kitchen with her hands on her hips. ‘Didn’t he promise to call?’
‘He didn’t ring me – I rang him on Tuesday,’ Maxine said. ‘He wasn’t very talkative.’
‘Perhaps he doesn’t want to see you,’ Jo said, drinking coffee. ‘I just don’t understand men nowadays.’
‘J-F’s depressed,’ Fliss said. ‘It’s not because he doesn’t care about you, Max.’
‘But you’re leaving on Sunday – you’ve only got three days left.’ Jo pushed a hand through her hair. ‘It’s hardly worth making the effort if he doesn’t call when he says he will.’
‘Men are a law unto themselves, darling – but I’m not going to stand here overthinking things,’ Fliss insisted. ‘Just ring him, Max.’
‘You think I should?’ Maxine asked.
‘But he hasn’t contacted you.’ Jo wrinkled her nose. ‘It’s obvious he doesn’t want to talk.’
‘I don’t agree – I think he’s desperate to talk,’ Fliss said. ‘He doesn’t know how to.’
‘You mean he can’t be bothered?’ Jo sniffed. ‘He’s just like Terry. I sent him that passionate text. He didn’t reply.’
‘I’ll ring Terry before we go home, Jo, and ask him what his plans are,’ Maxine suggested. ‘He can’t stay where he is forever.’
‘But J-F’s desperately unhappy,’ Fliss insisted. ‘He needs your help.’
‘I think it’s a case of avolition,’ Maxine said. ‘That was something we encountered at The Hopeful Group.’
‘What does that mean?’ Jo asked.
‘Basically, avolition means you can’t make yourself do everyday things,’ Maxine explained. ‘It’s like inertia. It happens to people who are depressed.’
Fliss swigged her coffee. ‘Go on, Max, ring – check he’s coming to the party tonight.’
‘Right, I will.’ Maxine grabbed her phone, pressed a button and took a breath.
A voice crackled in her ear immediately.
‘J-F. Oh, hello. Where are you?’ She listened.
‘No – why don’t I come to you? I’ll drive for a change.
Right. Oh, no, don’t worry – I’m calling you now, so it’s no big – what?
No, not at all. I’ll be at your place in half an hour.
Yes, me too. No, it’s not a bother – yes, I’ll see you then.
’ Maxine held the phone away. ‘Good. That’s sorted. ’
‘What did he say?’ Jo asked.
‘He meant to call me last night. He said he remembered when it was too late, but I think he might have been drinking.’
‘That’s a sign he’s feeling in the dumps,’ Fliss said. ‘It never cheered me up, drinking alone. I’m glad you’re taking him out, darling.’
‘We’ll go somewhere quiet, then I’ll bring him back to Le Shack.’
Fliss said pointedly, ‘He’ll miss you when you go back to London, Max.’
‘I’ll keep in touch,’ Maxine said. ‘With everybody.’
‘Théo and Manu are going to ask J-F to give them some help decorating the house – just to occupy his time,’ Fliss said. ‘We have to rally round and give him some proper support.’
‘I like him,’ Maxine said. ‘It’s easy being with him. We talk.’
‘That’s more than I can say for Russell.’ Jo made a guilty face. ‘We never had much to say to each other at all.’
‘Oh, I’ve had relationships like that,’ Fliss said. ‘All passion and panting, then afterwards you realise that you’ve got nothing in common at all. I’m glad those days are over.’
Jo gave a deep sigh. ‘I’d be happy to have my old marriage back. I didn’t realise how good it was.’
‘Wise words,’ Fliss said. ‘Have courage, Jo, and don’t you dare stop trying.’ She turned to Maxine. ‘What time are you meeting J-F?’
‘I’ll leave soon.’ Maxine looked down at her shorts and jacket. ‘Will I be all right dressed like this?’
‘Shouldn’t you put something nice on?’ Jo asked.
‘You look a million dollars as you are,’ Fliss said.
‘You’re going to the beach, I guess? Oh, I know – there’s a little café just on the edge of Cap Breton on the west coast that does great fish.
And the beach there is glorious. Take your swimsuit and a towel and some sunscreen. And a big floppy sun hat.’
‘Right – I will.’ Maxine reached for her car keys. She hurried upstairs, threw a few things in her bag and headed back down.
‘And you’re coming with me, darling,’ Fliss said to Jo.
‘I’m revamping Maurice’s old library. I want to display some of Maurice’s photos, his old books – but let the light in.
Then we can go shopping in Chapellin and buy ourselves something sinful.
And we’ll meet you and J-F at Le Shack later, Max? ’
‘That’s perfect.’ Maxine enveloped them both in a hug and set off. She heard Jo call, ‘Good luck,’ as she left and Fliss’s happy laugh.
‘Oh, she won’t need luck, darling. She’s far too smart.’
Maxine was feeling quite pleased as she and J-F lay on the beach at Cap Breton.
Fliss had chosen the location well. The sun made the sea glitter blindingly, and the sand tickled their toes.
J-F looked relaxed in Ray-Bans and swim shorts.
He was tanned and toned; she hadn’t really noticed how good-looking he was.
Perhaps she had; it hadn’t really been an issue.
Apart from once. When she’d been drunk.
She stretched out on the towel, glad she’d brought the red swimsuit. The sun warmed her face and she sighed.
J-F stretched luxuriously. ‘I’d forgotten how nice this beach is.’
‘Have you been here a lot?’
‘Many times.’ J-F paused for a moment. ‘Max – I must apologise.’
‘Why?’
‘Because of something that happened when I went to Vannes.’
‘What happened?’
‘Noémie’s mother had made dinner. We sat together around the table, Noémie’s mother, her sister, her sister’s husband, her brother and his wife. And me.’
‘That must have been difficult.’
‘It was. We were talking about what we had been doing. Then I mentioned you.’
‘Oh?’
‘I said I had a friend, an English tourist who I met, who made me feel happy. Stefan, Noémie’s brother, asked me if I would fall in love again and I told him I couldn’t say about the future. Noémie’s mother began to cry.’
‘I’m sure you didn’t mean to offend her,’ Maxine said.
‘I wouldn’t do that. But she thinks life has cheated her.’
‘I suppose it has.’
‘I felt guilty because, for the first time, I thought, what if I could love again? What if, in my heart, there’s still a little space for love?’ He rolled onto his stomach. ‘Do you think it’s possible?’
‘There’s always hope.’
‘And you?’ J-F looked directly at her. ‘Could you love again?’
‘Honestly? I never think about it.’
‘Think of it now.’
Maxine rolled over too, meeting his gaze. ‘I’ve tried and I failed every time. But…’
‘But?’
‘Who knows?’
‘Who knows?’ J-F smiled.
Maxine smiled back. ‘Right now, we’re healing, and that’s taking us in a good direction.’
‘It is.’ J-F placed his hand over Maxine’s. ‘Thank you for being here for me. I hope I can be here for you.’
Maxine felt a soft emotion wrap her in its arms. Affection. Empathy. She said, ‘I hope so too.’
J-F scrambled to his feet. ‘Let’s go for a swim.’ He held out a hand. ‘Shall we?’
‘Great idea.’ Maxine took it, his dry palm against hers. ‘The water will be colder than it looks, but who cares?’
‘Who cares?’ J-F said. ‘Sometimes in life we have to forget about the cold and make a splash.’
Two hours later, they were sitting in the café, their plates empty. Maxine said, ‘I’ve never had fish à la meunière before. It was delicious, with the spinach and capers.’
‘What do you eat in London?’ J-F asked.
‘My favourite food’s Indian, but I love Italian, Ethiopian, South American.’
‘What is Ethiopian food like?’
‘Delicious. Spicy stews and curries served on injera, a spongy pancake-like bread.’
‘Do you miss your home? London?’ J-F asked.
‘I suppose I miss my flat – having my things to hand – but no, not really.’ Maxine pushed a hand through her hair. It was still damp from the swim. ‘There are some things to resolve when I get back.’
‘Russell?’
‘No, not Russell.’ Maxine didn’t think she’d see him again, not now. ‘Terry’s in my flat. Jo wants him back.’
‘It’s over between them?’
‘He won’t speak to her.’ She met J-F’s gaze. ‘But there are lots of reasons why people don’t speak to each other.’
‘Like when I don’t ring you after I say I will?’ J-F exhaled sadly. ‘You understand why?’
‘Because you feel depressed?’
‘Because when I’m with you, Max, I’m happy. Then when I go home, I’m alone. And I say to myself, she’ll go back to England soon and I must try to be strong by myself. And I don’t know if I should phone you or not. So I don’t.’
‘You can be strong by yourself,’ Maxine said. ‘You’re really strong. We both are.’
‘We are.’ J-F placed a hand over hers. ‘I have courage.’
‘I’m always on the end of a phone.’
‘That’s nice to know.’ J-F squeezed her hand. ‘We’ll be all right.’
‘We will.’
‘So tonight – remember. You promised to dance with me, Max. What’s your favourite song? I’ll ask them to play it.’
‘“Flashdance”,’ Maxine joked. ‘Oh, you mean something romantic?’
‘Of course,’ J-F said. ‘What else?’
‘“True”, Spandau Ballet? Or something by Santana – “Samba Pa Ti”.’
‘That sounds good,’ J-F said. ‘So – let’s have a coffee and go back to the beach.’
‘Perfect,’ Maxine said. ‘Then we’ll party.’
‘You can leave me at my house in Chapellin,’ J-F said. ‘I’ll shower, then I’ll come over to you.’
‘J-F…’ Maxine had to ask. ‘You will come? I mean – you won’t stand me up?’
‘And miss my dance?’ J-F’s eyes gleamed with mischief. ‘Never. We’ll dance together to Santana. Then I’ll go home. Unless of course you decide to invite me to stay the night on the couch…?’