Confrontations #3
I finally breathe out a sigh of relief as his words sink in.
Over. I can barely even fathom what that means.
I try and imagine a life free of his influence, but it seems impossible.
Alex will show me. I wrap him in my arms and breathe in his scent.
He holds me just as tight, and I never want to let him go.
If I do, I feel like I’ll disappear, float away somewhere and never return.
He rubs my back and repeats, “Everything will be okay,” until I believe it.
***
Alex
Our hug is interrupted when Sasha clears his throat, still a bit disoriented. I gently pull away from Jake and turn to him. He’s assessing the carnage in the room.
“Are you okay?” I ask him.
He nods. “I’ve had worse. This was kind of anticlimactic, yes? Thirty years of bullshit, solved with one bullet. He made a mess,” he deadpans. “Like water balloon. Shall we go rescue Brandon now?”
“Oh, shit! Brandon!” I make a mad dash for the basement, Sasha and Jake following close behind. I bust through the door expecting to see the grisly sight of Brandon being tortured or lying dead on the floor. I freeze, assessing the sight before me, and then laugh.
Brandon is sitting on the floor with his back against a wall, smoking his joint. Danil is sitting next to him, passed out. “Hey little dude,” Brandon says, holding the blunt out to me. “Smoke?”
“Um, no?” I say, confused. “What is happening right now?”
“Well, we were down here chilling, sharing a joint, but Danil here fell asleep. Lame.”
“Why are you being so calm about this, Brandon?! I thought you said you only smoked with your homies! Your hands are still tied!”
He looks down at his hands, and laughs. “Oh yeah. Can you untie me? Danil’s actually pretty chill.
He just needed a friend.” I move forward to help him, but Sasha stops me with a hand before walking over to Danil and patting him down for weapons.
He pulls out a switchblade, and flicks it open before cutting Brandon free.
“Thanks man,” he says, rubbing his wrists. “I’m always down for a smoke sesh, but bondage is not my thing. Where is Seth?”
“I don’t know. The Russians searched the house but didn’t find him.”
“Good, good.”
Sasha stands over Danil, staring down at him with his head cocked.
He gives him a light kick, but he doesn’t wake, so he hauls Danil over his shoulder, and we all head out of the basement.
Back in the lobby, Sasha tosses Danil down next to Mr. Covington, his body landing with a loud thud. He’ll feel that when he wakes up.
“I will get this cleaned up, take him out of here,” he says, motioning to Jake, who is standing there still looking shell shocked. Brandon heads back behind the desk like nothing happened.
“Are you gonna kill him?” I point to Danil.
Sasha shrugs. “Depends on him.”
“You should be happy. I know this kind of stuff is better than Christmas morning for you. Go to town. Just remember, burn the bones when you’re done and bury whatever is left off of this property. We’ll also need to dispose of their car. Find a local crackhead to donate it to, or something.”
“I understand.”
I nod. “Okay well, we’ll leave you to it then.
Come on Jake.” I look over to him and see he’s still rooted in place.
“Jake,” I repeat softly. He jumps like he hadn’t heard me.
I nod my head towards the front door. He eyes Sasha for a minute before skirting around him.
To his credit, Sasha backs up and gives him space.
I send Sasha a small smile of gratitude before walking up to Mr. Covington and giving his body a kick in the ribs.
For a split second I think he moves a hand towards me, and I let out a super manly squeak as I rush backward. He’s still dead though.
Mr. Covington’s words replay in my head as Jake and I head out the front door.
What kind of freak blames his own son for being raped?
I feel like I’m crawling out of my skin.
I wish we could resurrect him and kill him again.
Maybe I can go back and help Sasha dismember his body.
Ew, no. I’m starting to realize that a life of crime is not for me.
I’ll leave it to Sasha. Jake walks beside me, listless.
“Do I invite the things that happen to me?” he asks.
“No, never! Nobody has the right to do anything to you that you don’t want, ever.
Under any circumstances. It’s not your fault, babe.
Your dad’s a psychotic freak for saying what he did, and none of it was true.
You’re such a good man. You’re kind, sometimes…
” I smile when he eyes me. “You’re gentle, and thoughtful, and you have a big—” He cuts me off with a hand over my mouth. I nip at his fingers.
“Thank you, brat. You always know just what to say to make me feel better. I think I want to be alone for a few minutes, if that’s okay. Process.”
“Oh, okay. That sounds like a good idea.” I lean in on tiptoes and give him a peck on the lips. “I’ll see you in a bit.”
He pulls me back in with a hand on my neck and kisses me until I’m little more than a puddle in front of him. “See you later.”
***
Jake
I’m pulled out of my spiraling thoughts when a taxi pulls up in front of the manor, parking next to Sasha’s truck, and Seth steps out. I put down my rake and wave. He wasn’t here. Thank god he wasn’t here. I’d never forgive myself if Seth got hurt again because of me.
“Hey man. Are you okay?” Seth asks, voice laced with concern.
“Not really.” I don’t know what else to say. He nods.
Just then, the front door opens and Danil comes running out like a madman. I take a step back, thinking he’s coming at me, but he flies right past me and Seth, chasing the taxi down the driveway.
“Wait!” he screams after it as he runs. I’m a little surprised Sasha didn’t kill him, but I trust Sasha. If he allowed him to walk away from this place, he had good reason.
Seth watches him for a minute, before turning to me. “What the hell is going on here, man?” he asks. I give him a brief rundown, watching his eyes go wide as I speak.
“Sounds like you guys have had quite the day, holy shit. You think any more about talking to someone?”
“Alex is my therapist. It’s going well.” He laughs at that.
“Sounds good, man. I’m glad you’re all still in one piece. I’m almost sad I missed all the action. Sounds like quite the show.”
“Sorry you missed it. Sasha’s still in there doing god knows what to his corpse, so you’re more than welcome to help with that.”
As if summoned, Sasha walks out the front door with a large black trash bag in hand. His sweaty hair is pushed back off his face, and his dark shirt is sticking to his chest and stomach. The taser marks are still visible on his neck, but he looks like he’s holding up okay.
Seth gapes at him, and I nudge him in the side. “You’re blushing, dude.”
“What?! No, I’m not. I don’t blush.” He clears his throat and bites his lip ring. “Do, um… do you need help with anything?” he asks Sasha and scuffs his shoe along the gravel, staring at the tattoos along his arms.
Sasha doesn’t say anything as he walks up to us and gives Seth a once over. “Can you lift heavy things?”
“Not really.”
“Does blood make you squeamish?”
“Nah, I can handle it.” He points to the bag. “That’s not the first dead guy I’ve seen.”
Sasha considers for a moment. “Okay. You can mop floor, there is lots of blood. Very big mess.”
“I can do that,” Seth breathes before chewing on his lip ring. Sasha reaches out to tug on his lower lip, which makes Seth blush harder.
“Come with me, then,” Sasha says. Seth follows him back into the house once he dumps the black bag into the back of his truck. I gag a little and watch them disappear into the house. What the hell just happened?
I should feel worse about killing my father, but right now all I feel is numb.
And relieved. That he can’t threaten the hotel anymore, that he can’t hurt me or Alex.
That we can all finally move on with our lives.
I think about my mother. Part of me wants to reach out to her, let her know he’s gone for good.
She’d probably throw herself a party. She’s always hated his guts but never enough to do anything about it.
I don’t want to see her, I realize. All I can think about are the times she didn’t stand up for me when she could have. She chose him every time.
I have no parents, I decide.
***
As I lay in bed with Alex later that night, I can’t get thoughts of my father out of my head.
“Should we be concerned about how desensitized to gore and death everyone around here seems to be?” I ask.
He shrugs.
“I should have been the one to kill him,” I say.
“No, you shouldn’t have. I know you; that’s not something you’d be able to live with. You’re not a killer. I’m glad you weren’t the one to do it. You don’t need that burden on your soul.”
“What about Sasha’s soul? Is he tainted?” I ask. If I would have been tainted by the act of killing, surely Sasha would be too, right?
“That’s different. Sasha… lives by his own moral code, and killing your father fit within that code. He’d probably tell you as much. I’ll never be able to repay him for sparing you that hurt.”
“I just don’t want him doing things he doesn’t want to do. He doesn’t have to live that way,” I say.
“I’m sure he knows that,” Alex reassures me. He lays back down, head resting on my chest and I wrap my arms around him.
“Hypothetically speaking, if I were to say I found a therapist that was willing to do house calls, is that something you’d still be interested in?” he asks into my chest.
I think about it for a minute. “Yeah, I’d still be interested. Thank you for doing that. I appreciate the way you look out for me.”
“Always, babe. She’ll be here tomorrow.”
Fuck.