11. Celia
Chapter eleven
Celia
Something in Celia’s chest was aching. She rubbed her chest with the heel of one hand as she rubbed more salve on the tear in the air dragon’s wing with the fingertips of the other.
Even though it was mending itself nicely, aided by the bitterball flower salve, the baby dragon complained at her, and she wished Darian were here—not just because he would be able to talk to the air dragon and know what Breeze was saying, but because she missed him.
She laughed out loud at the idea, scolding herself. “You don’t need to miss him,” she said, continuing to rub, the ache in her chest pressing at her. “You’ve barely known him for a fortnight. There’s no need to miss him.”
The dragons began chirping at her, and she frowned at them.
“I don’t need Darian,” she told them. “It’s not as if I am incapable of doing things without him.
He is a good help, but he is not essential to my well-being or to yours, and it is absolutely ridiculous that I keep looking to see if he’s here or not.
He has a life, you know, outside of us. Just because you four miss him too doesn’t mean he should drop everything in his life and come by us.
Besides, it is entirely inconvenient for him. His uncles need his help.”
The dragons continued chirping at her. If only she could understand them. “You all need to pipe down. Go on, skedaddle—out of my house. Go cause trouble outside. You’re all far too big to be in here anyway.”
They needed to grow up and leave. The triplets were each becoming close to the size of a donkey, and Sod wasn’t far behind them.
She could barely walk around her house when they were all inside, but they liked to stay near when she was helping the air dragon.
And since they kept up a steady stream of chirps, trills, and squawks, she could only assume they were telling the air dragon something—what it was, she wasn’t sure, and she wasn’t sure if it painted her in a good or bad light.
But it seemed to have a good effect on Breeze, so she let them stay inside while she worked on her wing.
She was applying the salve at least three or four times a day for now, as often as she remembered. It soaked into dragon wings quickly, especially where the membrane was more like a thin leather than the scales that covered the rest of their bodies.
She wrapped the wing close to Breeze’s body, so she didn’t try to spread it and make the tear worse, then shooed the older dragons outside and closed the door behind them.
Breeze had grown; in one day she was already the size of a large cat. Celia tossed her a piece of dried meat to eat before opening the cabinet and contemplating her supplies.
If Darian didn’t come today, she might have to go to town herself.
That was one thing about him coming out every day: he’d been bringing her supplies to feed the animals that were eating her out of house and home.
Long gone were the days of having a hearthful of hatchlings.
She wasn’t sure even one of them could fit in the hearth anymore, and their appetites reflected that.
The ache in her chest eased when she heard Darian’s voice calling a cheerful “Hello!”
He was here.
Something in her lightened, even though there was no reason for it. She was capable of doing this alone…but she’d be lying if she didn’t admit it was easier with him.
She could hear him chatting to the dragons as she stood and made her way to wash a few dishes she’d let pile up before he came in. It was better if she looked busy when he arrived, she told herself.
She didn’t want to look as if she were sitting around waiting on him all day, because she wasn’t. It didn’t count if her day didn’t really begin until he arrived.
He rapped on the door before opening it and poking his head in. “Good morning,” he said with a smile. “Have you been outside yet today? It is beautiful out. Should we go for a walk?”
Celia glanced at the air dragon, who was taking a nap, and smiled. “I think we can slip away for a little bit,” she said.
“Oh, good.” He reached for her shawl hanging by the door and held it out for her as she approached, gently putting it over her shoulders and arranging it before opening the door for her and allowing her to exit.
“After you, my lady,” he said.
“I’m not a lady,” she protested.
But when he offered his arm, she took it, biting the inside of her cheek to keep from smiling. It didn’t mean anything. He was only being silly, but her heart still flip-flopped at how close he was.
She shoved it down. This was ridiculous. She should put a stop to it. He was too young for her, and it didn’t matter if he was tall and handsome with a boyish grin that made her heart beat faster even as he made her feel safe.
This was silly, and she was being ridiculous. She should not be letting herself fall for Darian.
She recognized this feeling for what it was now. She had been in denial for long enough, but it was obvious she was quite in danger of losing her heart to him—and she didn’t want that.
She’d lost her heart to a man once before, and it had nearly shattered when she’d lost him. She didn’t need to do it again, especially because she had no doubt Darian was meant for bigger things than settling down with a healer who couldn’t heal.
It was obvious; there was no point in someone who could talk to dragons living a hermit’s life with her.
And at some point, someone would notice his absence from town. He was too much of a central figure for it to go unnoticed that he was disappearing every day, and she didn’t need someone following him here.
Just a little longer, her heart whispered. She could enjoy this for a little while longer.
“I heard you were talking about me,” he teased, letting his hand rest on top of hers where it lay on his arm, as if he were trying to keep her from running away from him.
“W-what?” she asked, her cheeks turning crimson.
“That’s what I heard,” he said gravely. “They said that you were talking to yourself.”
“I was telling them that you were coming,” she admitted, trying to pull her hand off his arm anyway.
But he shook his head, the weight of his hand holding hers feeling heavier than a brick. “Oh, no,” he said. “You see, these dragons are almost as bad as my uncles.”
“Almost?” she squeaked.
“Maybe a little worse,” he admitted. “My uncles are a little less vocal about it.”
Celia used her free hand to cover her face. It wasn’t worth trying to pull her hand away from his arm again, not when she didn’t really want to.
“I don’t want to know, do I?” she asked.
“Probably not,” he admitted. “But I’ll have you know, it’s great fun.”
Celia groaned. “I wish you couldn’t talk to dragons,” she said.
“I don’t,” he said solemnly. “If I couldn’t talk to dragons, I might not have the same senses that I do, and I might not have realized just how much I need you.”
The words were quiet, and she turned to him, her eyes wide. “What?”
What was he saying?
A dragon started chirping, and Darian whirled around, looking down at Sod, who was looking toward the mountains and chattering rapidly. “You’re leaving?” he asked.
Sod looked back at them, chirped a few times, then began walking away.
Darian watched as Sod walked away, his jaw clenching. Celia looked up at him and rubbed his arm. “I’m sorry,” she said. “Sometimes it’s hard when they leave.”
She’d grown used to watching them go, but Darian hadn’t.
The spot in her chest that ached when he left was aching now, feeling his sadness in her own way, and she resisted the urge to rub it.
“I knew he would.” Darian’s voice was rough. “I knew he would leave, but I didn’t expect it to hurt this much.”
“I’m afraid of how much it will hurt when they leave,” Celia admitted. Her fire dragons were looking after Sod but showed no sign of leaving.
Yet.
“I know they need to leave,” she said, her voice cracking. “But I’m not ready for it.”
“Do you think they can sense that?” he asked gently.
“Maybe,” she admitted. “I wouldn’t put it past them.”
“Maybe they know that they need to keep pushing the two of us together before they can leave,” Darian teased.
If that was the reason they were staying, they needed to find some other excuse.
She’d grown closer to Darian than anyone else in her life right now, far too quickly.
And it was silly, but she hoped they were staying because they loved her, too.
Celia sighed. “I hope they have more reason than that to stay, even though I know they need to go.”
“This is why you do it, right?” Darian asked. “So they can leave?”
“I know,” Celia said, the words sticking in her throat. “It’s just going to be harder this time than usual.”
“That’s very understandable,” he said, wrapping his arm around her waist as they watched Sod plod off slowly.
Her traitorous heart leaped at the touch, but she couldn’t find it in herself to step away. Not when they both needed the comfort.
“We’ll see them again someday.”
“I’ve never seen one after they leave before,” Celia said.
He looked down at her, his eyes twinkling. “I know, but I have a feeling it’s going to be different this time.”