Chapter 19
“Your mother’s intense,” commented Ronin. He grinned and added, “I like it.” He watched the door close behind her and nodded approvingly. “She walked in here ready to declare war, accuse everyone of incompetence, and possibly challenge science itself. That’s commitment. I respect commitment.”
“She’s just in shock,” soothed Iris, glaring at Ronin. “It’s a very normal reaction after seeing her grandson age a decade.” She crossed her arms and looked toward the stairs where Darian had disappeared. “Most people would be handling this far worse.”
Beverly swept a strand of hair away from her face.
“Amelia always liked to play the victim. She craves attention. Always has. Which is ridiculous because whenever we’re in the same room together, all the attention naturally goes to me.
You don’t see me complaining about it.” She smiled.
“I’m just too desirable.” She placed a hand against her chest and shook her head sadly.
“It’s a burden, really. Men stare. Women stare.
Sometimes dogs stare. I’ve learned to live with it. ”
“She just needs a moment to let the idea settle,” Iris added. Her voice remained patient, which was more patience than I currently possessed.
“Well, enough about Amelia,” said Beverly.
“There are only so many minutes in a day, and I prefer to spend mine thinking about people I actually enjoy. Ruth’s making lunch, and I need to keep up my strength.
I have dinner tonight with a very handsome werebear widower, and at our age, romance is practically an endurance sport.
” She stopped at the door. “And later, when tempers have cooled, we can all discuss Amelia’s outfit.
Those shoes with that top were a cry for help.
I don’t know what kind of help, but help nonetheless.
” She tossed her hair over one shoulder and swept out the front door with all the confidence of a woman who assumed every head would turn to watch her leave.
Knowing Beverly, she probably believed traffic would slow down for the occasion.
“You okay?” Iris was next to me, her face filled with concern.
“Don’t let what your mother said get to you.
She was just upset because she didn’t understand what happened.
She was scared. That’s all.” Her eyes searched mine carefully.
Unfortunately, understanding what happened wasn’t exactly my strong suit right now either.
“She blames me,” I told her. “She didn’t come out and say it, but it was there.
What happened to Darian is my fault. And it is.
” The words sat heavily in my chest. Because no matter how many times people told me otherwise, the timeline kept looping through my head.
One event leading to another. One bad decision.
One terrible person. One chain reaction.
“Don’t talk stupid.” Ronin stood. “You can’t blame yourself for that lunatic’s actions.
” He pointed toward the door Beverly had just exited through.
“And for the record, if we’re assigning blame today, I feel like the crazy scientist who experimented on a child should rank significantly higher than the mother of said child. ”
I shook my head. “Can’t I? Maybe if I hadn’t pushed Allison so hard and she didn’t come after me when she did.
She would have never ended up in jail. Her sister would have never known about me.
And all of this would have never happened.
” The logic was flawed. I knew it was flawed.
But anxiety wasn’t exactly famous for being reasonable.
It took one tiny thread and somehow knitted an entire guilt sweater out of it.
“Allison tried to kill you, remember?” pressed Iris.
She stared at me like she couldn’t believe we were having this conversation.
“Multiple times, if we’re being accurate.
Let’s not rewrite history just because you’re upset.
” Her expression softened. “You didn’t create Addison.
You didn’t force Allison to make her choices.
And you certainly didn’t inject your own son with some bizarre experimental substance.
” She paused. “The villain here is still the villain.”
Ronin nodded. “Exactly. Trust me. I’ve met a lot of terrible people. Some of them were relatives. Some of them were coworkers. One of them tried to sell my organs.” He pointed at me. “The common theme was that their terrible decisions were their terrible decisions. Not mine.”
I sighed and rubbed my temples. The annoying thing was that they were right.
Rationally, logically, objectively right.
Unfortunately, motherhood wasn’t always rational.
Sometimes it was just lying awake at three in the morning inventing new ways to blame yourself for things completely outside your control.
“She was right about one thing,” I told them as I rubbed the back of my neck and stared toward the front door where my mother had disappeared.
For all her dramatics, occasional guilt trips, and uncanny ability to make me feel twelve years old again in under thirty seconds, she wasn’t wrong about Addison.
The wereape had inserted herself into our lives, and now everything felt off balance.
“Only one?” teased Iris. One dark eyebrow lifted as she tried—and failed—to hide her smile.
A tiny smile escaped me despite myself. “That I need to find Addison. I have to find that wereape and make her pay.” My fingers curled automatically.
Every time I pictured Darian’s face, older overnight, the anger came rushing back, fresh and sharp, ready to go.
It was becoming exhausting carrying around this much rage. Useful but exhausting.
Ronin crackled his knuckles. “Sign me up.” He sat forward. “I’ve already got several ideas. Most of them involve punching. A few involve threats. One involves a shovel. We can workshop the details later.”
“I would, but I still have no idea where she or her lab are.” Frustration hit.
I hated feeling useless. Worse was that I was given a new ability but didn’t know how to use it.
It was like someone had handed me the keys to the most powerful magical sports car in existence but forgot to explain where the brakes were.
Or the steering wheel. Or why it occasionally drove itself into random bathrooms.
“What about Marcus?” asked Iris, her dark eyes searching my face. “Did he find any leads? Anything?” She looked hopeful. I wished I felt the same way.
I shrugged. “Not that I know of. He’d tell me if he found something.” I thought of something and glanced at the Dark witch. “What about a locator spell or something? Can’t we try that?” Because at this point, I was willing to consider every option short of hiring skywriters.
Iris made a face. “If magic worked the way people think it does, my job would be a lot easier. Locator spells require a sympathetic link—hair, blood, clothing, a personal item, anything carrying a residual magical imprint.” She spoke patiently, which suggested she’d had this conversation more than once, probably hundreds of times.
“Man, you’re so sexy when you speak witch-geek,” purred Ronin, giving Iris a huge smile. “Can you say that again later tonight?” He leaned back. “Maybe slower.”
Iris smacked him on the arm, her face flushed. “Stop. We’re trying to be serious here.” She looked genuinely annoyed. Mostly. The slight pink in her cheeks betrayed her.
“Oh, I’m very serious,” continued my half-vampire friend. “Educationally speaking.”
Iris cleared her throat. “The point is the spell needs a target frequency to tune itself to.” She crossed her arms. “Without that, all it does is search for one random wereape somewhere on the continent. Do you know how many wereapes that is?” She looked at me expectantly.
“Too many?” I guessed. It felt like a safe answer.
“Way too many,” answered Iris. “It’s up to you or Marcus to find her. You never know. He might get lucky. He does have a massive network of informants everywhere.” Her voice softened slightly. “People talk to Marcus. They always have.”
I glanced at her. “You seem to have learned a lot since you started to work there.” A year ago, she would have been hiding behind a stack of books. Now she sounded like she was running briefings.
Iris beamed. “I have. I know secrets.” The pride in her voice was adorable.
“What kind of secrets,” asked Ronin, clearly interested. He leaned forward. “Good secrets? Illegal secrets? Fun secrets?”
Iris laughed. “I’m not telling. They’re secrets.” The Dark witch lost her smile when she saw my face. “We’ll find her. Don’t worry.” She sounded so certain. Like she genuinely believed it.
I let out a small laugh. “I wish I shared your optimism. And if he can’t find her, it’s up to me.
So far, my portal mojo isn’t looking all that great.
We might never be able to find her.” I glanced at the spot where Martha’s bathtub had recently appeared in my life.
“At this rate I’m going to locate every random citizen in Hollow Cove before I find Addison.
Tomorrow I’ll probably open a portal into someone’s garage. Or dentist appointment. Or book club.”
“You found her once, Tess,” said Ronin. “You can find her again.” He pointed toward me with complete confidence. “Besides, your portal thing clearly works. It’s just weird. Some powers throw fireballs. Yours apparently enjoys side quests.”
“You’re crazy.” I laughed, feeling some of my tension loosen. I was lucky to have such great friends. For the first time all day, the knot in my chest eased a fraction. Not much but enough to remind me what normal breathing felt like.
“And ravenous,” said my half-vampire friend, tapping his stomach. “I’m going to have two servings of whatever Ruth’s cooking.” He rubbed his hands together. “Three if there’s garlic bread. Four if Beverly starts flirting with somebody and gets distracted.”