Chapter 17 #2
Finally, I understand what he’s getting at.
My cheeks heat, and my stomach does an annoying little flip, somewhere between anxiety and anticipation.
I can practically hear the part he’s not saying out loud: “You should come with me, because if we were really bonded we wouldn’t want to miss an opportunity to bathe together and it will look suspicious if you wait in the tent instead of pretending to let me fuck you in the bath. ”
“Alright,” I say in a slightly strangled voice.
Fox nods once, his expression unreadable as he ducks into the tent, reemerging seconds later carrying the soap and towels from the previous tent occupant’s trunk.
We walk in stiff silence down the row of tents and out of the camp in the same direction I walked to go look for herbs. I’m surprised when we pass right by the patch of snow I melted, and Fox keeps leading us deeper into the trees.
“You can speak normally now,” he says when we’ve walked for several minutes.
“Why would you put the bathing facilities so far outside the camp?”
“That’s just where they are.”
I glance at the snow-covered ground around us and grimace. “Please tell me you’re not leading me to some frozen pond where I’ll have to break through the ice.”
From the side, I see the corner of his mouth tip up. “No. There are hot springs all over Thermia.”
“Oh!” My mood instantly lightens. Despite the awkwardness hanging between us, the prospect of actual hot water makes my skin tingle with anticipation. “That sounds good, but isn’t anyone else using them?”
“Probably not right now. It’s the middle of the afternoon.” He pauses, then his gaze darkens slightly. “They’re not private though, so don’t go here alone.”
I bite my lip. Actually, that’s exactly what I’d been thinking about doing.
Lying around in the hot springs everyday sounds far less miserable than lying around in the tent.
Not wanting to make Fox any promises I have no intention of keeping, I change the subject.
“What will they do about Kai’s burns? Do they have a healer? ”
He nods. “Almost everyone has some basic knowledge of healing—not the way you would do it, but Kai will be fine.”
I think of Fox holding his injured arm until the muscle and skin knit themselves back together and resist the urge to gag. “You heal faster than Fae?”
“Shifters do, yes.”
I take that to mean that he’s somewhere in the middle, being half-Fae. “How long will the burns take to heal?”
He shrugs. “Not sure. Might be healed already, but it takes a lot of energy. No matter what, it will be a few days before Kai is himself again.”
I glance sideways at him. His tone and expression are neutral, but his shoulders are rigid, and there’s just something about the way he’s walking that makes me think he’s upset. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.”
I bite my lip. “No…it’s definitely something.”
He glances at me, eyebrows lifting slightly. “How can you tell?”
“No idea.” I grin. “So, are you going to tell me?”
Fox’s pale eyes narrow, his gaze sweeping over me. The muscle in his jaw ticks, as though he’s weighing the pros and cons of answering me honestly. “Kai isn’t a natural alpha,” he says finally.
“Why do you say that?”
“It’s just a fact.”
My brow furrows. “Kai seems like a good leader. At least, everyone seems to like him.”
Fox kicks a stone off the path and watches it skitter into the trees. “Being well-liked and being an alpha aren’t the same thing.”
“Sometimes people rise to the occasion if they’re given more responsibility, even if that’s not what they originally envisioned for themselves. Look at Daemon and Alix. Neither of them had any intention of ruling a kingdom, but things have been far better in Vernallis since they took over.”
Fox shakes his head. “It’s not the same. Alphas are dominant from birth, it has nothing to do with who deserves the job. Kai is a beta, which means he’s more dominant than most of the camp, but a real alpha would still overpower him easily.”
“I’ve read about shifter hierarchy before,” I muse. “I didn’t realize it was so rigid. What happens if a beta tries to lead?”
“They can lead a pack temporarily, but once a more dominant shifter is thrown into the pack, everyone will naturally start to look to them for leadership instead. Kai knows that.”
“Would that cause problems?”
“Yes. Without a clear chain of command they’ll lose more soldiers until the camp falls apart.”
I frown. “Well who else is there who could take over?”
Fox takes a long second to answer, and I’m almost sure he’s going to tell me that he could take over as the leader if he wanted to. I don’t know where I got that impression or what that would even mean, but my instinct is that’s what’s really bothering him.
But he doesn’t say that at all.
“Remember the male who brought us here?” Fox asks.
I wrack my brain trying to recall the name of the enormous, bearded man who kept calling me a witch. “Viktor?”
“Yes. He’s a natural alpha.”
“Then why isn’t he in charge?”
“I don’t know. I’ll have to ask Kai…” Fox trails off, shaking his head. “I don’t know why I care.”
“Because they’re your friends?” I suggest.
Fox doesn’t answer. His jaw tightens and his gaze drifts away from mine, a muscle working in his cheek. Fortunately, I don’t have long to stew on it because barely a minute later the trees thin out, and I can see brighter light up ahead.
I speed up, practically skipping as I race through the last row of trees, bursting out into the middle of a large rocky clearing.
A grin spreads across my face as I take in the cluster of small pools, separated by smooth gray boulders.
The largest pool sits in a natural depression in the ground, its edges worn smooth by what looks like years of use.
Steam rises from the opaque surface of water, spiraling into the air and leaving droplets of condensation clinging to the needles of the surrounding pines.
I let out an excited giggle. “This is perfect.”
Fox makes a rough sound in the back of his throat. “It’s usually more crowded.”
“Oh, really?” I glance around at the open area, considering that. “I suppose if you’re taking your clothes off to shift into wolves all the time, it wouldn’t be such a big deal.”
He clears his throat. “Right.”
Neither of us says anything for a long second, and when I glance back at Fox I find him purposefully avoiding my gaze.
“I’ll stay over here,” he grunts, gesturing vaguely to the left bank of the largest pool. “You take the other side. I won’t look.”
“Oh. Right. Sure. Thank you.”
I duck my head, letting my hair fall in front of my face like a curtain. I’m painfully aware that there’s no point in him bothering not to look at me. It’s not like he hasn’t had his eyes all over me before. And his hands. And tongue. And—
I shake my head violently. I need to stop thinking about it.
“Here,” Fox says, voice half strangled as he shoves one of the two drying cloths at me. He looks down at the single bar of goat milk soap in his hand and frowns, then tries to hand that to me too.
I push his hand and the soap back toward him. “No, go ahead. Just give it to me when you’re done.”
“You can have it first.”
“You’re the one covered in blood, it’s fine. I’ll wait.”
He looks caught between wanting to argue with me and wanting to end this conversation, but finally nods and turns to walk toward the opposite end of the rocky bank.
I move stiffly over to my side. I haven’t even taken my clothes off yet, but already I’m shivering as nervous goosebumps appear on my skin.
I hear Fox moving to the far side of the spring, and then the familiar clink of buckles and rustle of leather as he removes his armor piece by piece and places it on the rocks.
I know it takes far longer to get that armor off than to undo a few buttons, so I should probably try to undress quickly and get in the water before he’s finished.
I don’t give myself time to think—just peel away my blouse and leggings and step into the spring.
The water rises to my thighs, then my hips, and suddenly nothing matters but the delicious heat seeping into my skin.
My shoulders drop, my spine uncurls, and a moan slips past my lips as the knots in my muscles loosen for the first time in days.
A sudden clatter of metal on stone splits the quiet behind me. I stiffen. “Are you alright?”
“Dropped my wrist guard,” he mutters, voice like gravel.
Every nerve in my body urges me to turn around, especially when I hear the water ripple and splash behind me, and my skin prickles with awareness as Fox enters the pool.
I wrap my arms in front of me, gripping both elbows with the opposite hands as I fight the magnetic pull urging me to look back at him.
I honestly think this might be less uncomfortable if there were more people around. I’m not exactly used to bathing in front of an audience, but there might at least be less tension if it weren’t just the two of us alone.
Trying to focus on nothing but getting clean, I sink into the water until only my mouth and nose are above the surface and float there while I wait for my turn with the soap.
Unfortunately, my mind keeps drifting to the other side of the pool and against my will, a dull throbbing begins between my legs as heat curls through me like steam rising from the water.
I shift slightly, trying to ignore it, but the silence between us only amplifies my awareness.
Every splash he makes behind me sends ripples across my skin.
I can’t focus on anything but my quickening breath.
Desperate for a distraction, I cast around for something to say. “Why are there more monsters up here in Thermia than in other parts of the continent?”
“Don’t know.” Fox says roughly. “Might be all the unsettled land. Or maybe it’s the mountains.”
“Makes sense. Have you always done this?
“Done what?”
“Did you fight monsters before?”
“Yes.”
“What was the first one?”
He laughs, the sound echoing off the water. “A bear.”