31. Luna
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
LUNA
We didn’t make good time, even though Benedetto was better able to ride. Both the horses were skittish, needing to be coaxed as we travelled closer to the pass. We were still a few miles from the mountain when the time came to set up camp.
Even with the fire crackling between us, a chill stayed in the air. Benedetto had been brooding all day, grunting the few times I’d tried to talk. He’d made the evening meal, but with no time to gather or hunt it was barely edible.
Still, hunger made me eat all of it.
We sat in silence, neither of us willing to break it.
I stared into the flames, thoughts running in circles. What did Benedetto’s moodiness mean now? Every time I thought we were getting closer, he pulled away again. There were moments when I wasn't sure how much I trusted him, or if he trusted me.
Footsteps squishing in mud brought both of us to our feet, my fan and his sword at the ready.
Sofia emerged into the firelight, her expression unusually serious. She’d braided her hair but left it down and wore a subdued leather tunic and trousers. It was the first time I’d seen her dressed in anything but what a nanny in a conservative household would wear.
There was even a blade in a worn sheath at her belt. What would she use it for? Sofia was terrible in a fight.
A jolt of unease passed through me. Why was she here?
"Hail the camp," Sofia said. "May I join you?"
Benedetto raised an eyebrow but lowered his blade. Surprise and annoyance mingled in his voice. "Sofia. To what do we owe the dubious honor?"
"You." Sofia regarded the damp logs we’d been using for seating with misgiving, then settled herself on one. "It seems the charade of seeking a master caught unintended attention."
A chill ran down my spine as Sofia continued. "Soulrider came to Kalion for unrelated reasons. While he was there, he heard that you were interested in training. He's currently keeping visiting with Rose while I came here to find out if it was true."
My breath caught. "Soulrider? He's here? I mean, in Kalion? With Rose? Is she safe? You know Bene's not interested in training, why didn’t you tell your master?"
Sofia smiled faintly. "Rose is safe. But I also knew you probably needed me soon, since you’d be close to Ygris pass. Soulrider didn’t ask me what I knew, he told me to come here and ask. So I did. I do need an answer from you."
Benedetto laughed bitterly. "Of course he did. Give him this answer. No, it wasn’t true. I was lying. I'm good at that, you know. People believe lies they want to hear."
He shot me a pointed, icy look.
I sneered back at him, a sharp stab of anger piercing through me. "I didn’t believe it. But it made bedding you easier if you thought I was a fool."
Let him think I was as cold as he was. I ignored the hurt spreading through me. It was better this way. I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of knowing how much he had hurt me.
Sofia sighed and rubbed her temples as if dealing with squabbling children. "Wonderful. Are you two sure you want to storm the tower of a dangerous sorcerer when you’re fighting like this? It seems like a recipe for disaster."
Benedetto’s jaw clenched, but he didn’t respond, just glared at Sofia.
Wait. “Sofia, is there a spell on us, influencing our minds? One to cause discord?”
She paused, staring from me to Benedetto. A long time passed, enough for me to shift from foot to foot and Benedetto to wince and settle back down on a log, stretching his leg out.
Sofia’s mouth tightened. “Yes. It’s subtle, and it digs up insecurities that are already there. And unfortunately, there’s little I can do to dislodge it. I don’t have the strength. They’re sunk deep, as if they were put on you both some time ago. And I missed it.”
“Good to know you can make mistakes,” Benedetto murmured.
Sofia settled on one of the other logs, her expression grim. "With that in mind, let me tell you more about your opponent. Since we’re now in a position where helping you is in line with my contract. Luna dying would cause permanent damage to Rose emotionally."
Her contract. Always about contracts and obligations with Sofia. Did she ever do anything simply out of care or loyalty? Or did she mask loyalty by claiming it was her contract?
Benedetto waved a hand dismissively. "Do you do everything to comply with your contract? Are you a slave? Or is it just a talent you have for ruining every good thing in your life?"
Sofia regarded him as she had me and Rose when we were young and misbehaving. "Do you try to ruin everything good in your life, or is it just a gift you were born with? This information might keep you from dying, so be silent and listen."
I jumped slightly at the acid note in Sofia’s usually calm and collected voice. I had never heard her speak like that. What weren’t we seeing here?
Benedetto opened his mouth to retort, and I kicked him in his bad leg. He gasped but closed his mouth.
Flickers of red and orange glowed in Sofia's eyes as she leaned forward intently. I hoped those lights were from the campfire. "Moonshifter’s greatest power allows him to alter his form, becoming any creature he desires. He could be a wolf stalking you in the shadows, or a bird watching from above."
I swallowed hard, a chill dancing down my spine at the thought. I’d thought he only changed to a wolf, as the stories said.
Benedetto remained still as a statue, but I caught the muscle ticking in his clenched jaw.
"What is not as commonly known is that Moonshifter can also influence minds," Sofia said, her attention on Benedetto. "Drive a sane man to madness or restore clarity to a broken psyche. This mental manipulation is perhaps his greatest weapon. As has been demonstrated on you, I think. Now that you’re aware of it, the influence will be less effective."
My husband let out a long slow breath as his hands clenched. The pain in his face made my stomach churn. In that moment, I saw past Benedetto’s icy facade to the anguish beneath it. The heavy weight of it settled inside me.
Maybe his coldness was a shield. A way to protect the fragile, wounded parts of himself. Parts that hoped and hurt, that loved so fiercely it broke him.
I looked at the man beside me, shadows and firelight playing across the planes of his face. Benedetto met my gaze, the flames reflecting in his dark eyes. In them, I glimpsed a reflection of my own longing and uncertainty.
“Last,” Sofia continued, “like all sorcerers, he has a sigil, which he’ll manifest when he uses his greater magics. That sigil can be used to manipulate him or harm him, if you can control it. Or if I can. That’s why I’m here, now.”
Could this change everything? We were two broken, untrusting people on a nearly impossible quest. But this information could transform it to a chance at redemption and hope amidst the darkness.
As if sensing the shift in the air between us, Sofia glanced from Benedetto to me and back again.
Benedetto’s grip tightened on his sword hilt, knuckles pale against the dark leather. "How will he manifest his sigil?"
“When he tries to break your minds.”
His voice was low and intense, each word precisely measured. "You can contain something so powerful while I beat him physically?"
Sofia held his gaze, unblinking. "Yes. It won’t be easy...or painless."
I suppressed a shiver, wrapping my arms around myself. When she was like this, she was scary.
"Moonshifter is arrogant, like all Sorcerers," Sofia said. "He underestimates those he views as beneath him. That will be your window, your single chance to fight him as I turn his magic against him. And I’ll have to be disguised; he won’t manifest if he’s aware of me."
"A chance that could kill us if we fail," I said quietly, voicing the fear pulsing through me.
Sofia inclined her head, her expression somber. Her outline flickered, and an elderly female sellsword sat with us, clad in shabby but well-maintained armor. "Yes. The risk is great. But so is the reward if you succeed. And no plan survives contact with the enemy. It’s likely that we’ll have to change how we attack, and you both need to be ready for that, too."
Her gaze flickered to Benedetto. "If we beat him, make him swear by his Name he’ll undertake the restoration of your brother’s mind… and whatever else is needed."
In the dancing firelight, I recognized the calculation in Benedetto’s expression. He was thinking again, rather than brooding.
Slowly, hesitantly, I reached out and placed my hand over Benedetto’s on the hilt of his sword. His skin was warm, the contact sending a jolt through me. He stiffened but didn’t pull away.
"We’re in this together," I held his gaze. "Whatever happens, we face it side by side. No more lies. No more walls between us."
For a long moment, Benedetto was still, his expression still. Then, almost imperceptibly, he nodded. His hand turned beneath mine, fingers interlacing with my own.
A silent promise.
Sofia's attention lingered on me, a flicker of something unreadable in the dark eyes of the illusion she wore.
Benedetto's hand tightened around mine as he narrowed his eyes at Sofia. "You're very eager to help all of a sudden. Why?"
The wrinkled scarred face of her illusion looked odd with sad, almost pitying smile. "Because I've seen too many people die. I'd rather not add Luna’s name to that list. And since Soulrider fancies you as an apprentice, protecting you fulfills my obligations to him."
I studied Sofia, trying to decipher the emotions that played across the unfamiliar features. Regret, sorrow, a hint of weariness, the burdens of a life spent navigating the treacherous currents of magic and politics. How much had she lost? How many ghosts haunted her steps?
As Sofia stood up, her glance flicked to my abdomen, a quizzical look that sent a chill down my spine. What did she sense?
The thought crashed through my mind like a tidal wave, panic rising. Instinctively, I pressed a hand to my stomach, as if I could shield the tiny life that might have been growing there. My cycle was a week late. I'd forgotten about it in the chaos of the past days. The realization hit me like a physical blow, stealing the breath from my lungs. What if it was true? What if I was pregnant, and we were about to face a sorcerer who could destroy us both?
I swallowed hard.
But as Sofia met my gaze, I caught a flicker of understanding, a silent acknowledgment of the truth we both suspected.
I forced a smile, hoping it didn't look as brittle as it felt. "I’m glad you’re here. We appreciate your help, more than I can say."
Sofia inclined her head, a faint smile playing at the corners of her mouth. "Just try not to get yourselves killed. I'd hate to have to explain that to Soulrider. I’ll set up my shelter over here. I’ll accompany you from here on."
With those words, she picked up her pack and moved to the other side of the small camp, beginning the process of setting up a small tent.
The crackling of the fire filled the silence between me and Benedetto, the flames casting flickering shadows across our faces. I stared into the dancing light, my mind racing with a thousand fears and doubts. What kind of mother would I be, dark as my world had always been?
The thought was a knife twisting with every breath. But beneath the fear, a tiny spark of something else kindled to life. A fierce, protective love, a determination to fight for the future I wanted. For the family I might one day have.
Benedetto's hand tightened around mine, his calloused fingers interlacing with my own. I glanced up at him, searching for any hint of the turmoil churning inside me. But his expression remained unreadable, his jaw set in a hard line as he stared into the fire.
"Benedetto," I said. "About earlier... I'm sorry. I shouldn't have?—"
He shook his head, cutting me off.
"Don't." He met my gaze, the intensity in his expression stealing my breath. "We both said things we didn't mean. But none of that matters now."
I swallowed hard, nodding. He was right. Our petty arguments seemed so insignificant in the face of what lay ahead. "Do you think we're ready for this? For Moonshifter?"
Benedetto was silent for a long moment, the muscles in his jaw working. "We have to be," he said at last. "For Francesco. For everyone he's hurt."
I squeezed his hand tighter, my chest aching for him. For the pain and guilt he carried, the weight of his brother's fate resting squarely on his shoulders.
And what of the weight I carried? The thought whispered through my mind, my free hand drifting to my stomach. The secret that could change everything? But I couldn't bring myself to speak it. Not yet. Not when the future was so uncertain, the path ahead shrouded in danger and darkness.
"We'll face him together," I said instead.
Benedetto's lips curved into a small smile, the sight of it warming me from the inside out.
And there, in the flickering light of the campfire, I caught a flicker of hope. A hope that somehow, someway, we would find a way through the darkness.