Seventeen
A smile playing on my lips, I breathed in the royal gardens before me.
The sun rays danced across them as a warm breeze whispered through the bushes, rustling the leaves of various shades of green.
Infused with a pleasant floral aroma, the gardens were a living, breathing thing as they hummed with activity.
Multi-colored birds mingled in the trees, fluttering their wings and hopping from branch to branch.
Some chirped happily in a repeating pattern while others trilled, adding their beautiful melody to the cacophony of sounds.
Rabbits and other small animals scampered through the grass before disappearing under the shadowy cover of the bushes abloom with big, magenta flowers.
The perfect harmony of the scene before me filled my heart with joy as I stood unmoving, taking it all in.
With Clairborne Palace behind me, I closed my eyes and turned my face up to the cerulean sky, basking in the warm sunlight.
Taking a deep breath, I let the air empty out of my lungs slowly while I released the ancient magic into the nature around me.
It seeped out through my pores, making my skin tingle, and settled into the earth under my feet.
Intangible but potent, the magic molded to the trees and the bushes, penetrating the bark and soaking into the leaves.
A soft exhale escaped my lips as I felt myself getting lighter, becoming an empty vessel.
Two strong arms wrapped around my waist and brought my back flush with a hard chest. The arms felt familiar, and the body behind me molded perfectly to my own, bringing me a sense of comfort. I let myself relax as the hold around my waist tightened.
“Is it done? Can we leave?” Adrian’s voice sounded next to my ear, his warm breath stirring the fine hairs on my temple.
“Yes.” I smiled as a feeling of peace descended upon me.
My skin tingled again, but for a different reason, as I felt the pull of his magic on my limbs.
The gardens around me dimmed and faded to black as the dip in my stomach told me that I was being transported to another world, different from my own.
“Where did you go?” My mother’s calm voice penetrated the haze of my mind.
“What?” I blinked and gave a slight shake of my head to clear my thoughts.
“You seemed far away, lost in thought. What were you thinking about?” Her curious gaze searched my face.
“I was thinking about the dream I had last night,” I told her before I turned back to the mirror.
We were in my room at Clairborne Palace, getting ready for the Solstice Ball.
“What was the dream about?” She gently brushed one of my curled locks over my shoulder.
“Adrian was in it,” I blurted out before I could stop myself. My face flushed as I met my mother’s knowing gaze in the mirror.
“I see,” she said with a small smile. “You and the lord have grown close over the past few weeks.”
“We have,” I admitted. “But not as close as we were in my dream.” Adrian had never held me like that.
We had yet to achieve that level of closeness in real life, though we were heading in that direction.
When I turned away from the mirror and faced my mother again, one of her brows lifted in question.
I realized a little too late how what I’d said had sounded.
“It wasn’t like that.” I turned several shades of red.
“He held me in his arms after I”—my brows pinched as I tried to recall the aspects of my dream—“after I had transferred my magic into nature.”
“Oh? Maybe it’s a sign that you’re growing stronger.”
“I hope so. In my dream, I was in the royal gardens, and they were beautiful. It was a warm and sunny day…” I trailed off as my gaze stretched to the window, to the cold, gray sky outside.
“Maybe your mind was showing you what your heart desires,” my mother said as she followed my gaze. She sighed heavily before refocusing on me. “Are you excited about seeing Adrian tonight?”
“I am.” I hadn’t seen him since we had arrived at the capital two days ago.
My parents had expressed that everyone was welcome to stay at the palace, but Adrian had politely declined, choosing to stay at Lady May’s instead.
“I know it’s silly, but I miss him,” I admitted, worrying the silky material of my gown.
“It’s not silly if he misses you, too.” My mother let the words sink in for a moment before she turned to the vanity and opened the square black box sitting atop it.
She retrieved the coronet I usually wore for special occasions.
The elaborate gold headpiece encrusted with emeralds glistened in the yellow glow of the chandelier as she faced me again and held it up.
Casting my gaze down, I bent at my knees slightly to make it easier for her to place the coronet on top of my head.
She did so skillfully, careful not to disturb the pins holding the top half of my hair up and away from my face.
“You look beautiful,” she said when I stood up straight.
The coronet sat heavy on my head, reminding me to square my shoulders and lift my chin.
Wearing it always made me feel regal. Now, with that feeling came one of guilt.
The Winter Solstice celebration was a long-standing tradition, but did we have the right to rejoice tonight when we were lying to everyone about the state of the kingdom?
“Do you think we should tell them?” I asked my mother, my voice dropping to a whisper.
Tension bracketed the corners of her mouth. “Your father is trying to find a way to stop the magic from depleting.”
“But they deserve to know. Tonight is the perfect opportunity to tell them. The lords of all the regions will be present.”
“You should leave decisions like that to the king,” she said sternly to curb further questions. I stared at her, taken aback by her tone. Her features softened as she took in my expression. “The royal women do not meddle in the runnings of the kingdom.”
“But he listens to you,” I pointed out, not willing to give up that easily.
“And I will not ask that of him.” Her eyes pleaded with me to understand.
“Trust that he will find a way. In the meantime, grow stronger in your magic so you can help him reinforce the wards.” I nodded and walked to the closet to retrieve my cloak.
“What are you doing?” she asked as I draped the cream-hued garment over my shoulders and fastened it below my clavicle.
“I want to practice my magic.” I headed for the door.
“I suppose we do have some time before the ball. Be careful with your dress.”
I had meant to slip out without another word but paused and turned around to look at her.
Standing in the middle of my room, she was the picture of elegance and grace in an opulent golden gown.
Her crown was a hefty gold headdress set with diamonds and emeralds of varying sizes.
My gaze lingered on it as I realized that I couldn’t hold her stern tone toward me against her.
The grave state of our kingdom weighed heavily on her—on all of us—threatening to pull us under.
“I love you,” I told her as I opened the door.
“I love you, too,” she answered with a small smile, which let me know that we had put the earlier disagreement behind us.
With another nod, I left the room before descending the wide stone steps to the first floor.
Dodging the servants dashing to and fro with last-minute preparations for the ball, I made my way down the long hallway to the back of the palace.
When I reached the narrow door that granted access to the royal gardens, I paused with my hand on the gilded handle.
Oh, how I wished that the idyllic setting from my dream lay on the other side.
Alas, the gardens would be cold and bleak, like my heart, which was filled with trepidation about the future of my kingdom.
I wished I could have stayed in my dream last night, wrapped in the feeling of happiness and peace.
But I’d had to wake up and face the dreadful reality.
“Emelin,” Adrian’s voice pulled me from my thoughts.
With my hand still on the door handle, I turned my head and found him standing in the hallway, several feet away from me.
“Adrian.” My lips curved into a smile. Instantly, his ever poised and unwavering presence made it easier to breathe.
“We arrived a little early.” He came closer, his black cloak flowing around him as he moved. “Are you heading to the gardens?”
“Yes. I’m going to practice my magic.”
“May I join you?”
“Of course.”
His eyes warmed, the silver hue in them intensifying, as they swept over my face. His usually stoic features softened the longer he looked at me, and my cheeks heated at the intensity of his stare.
“It’s good to see you.” He gave me his signature half-smile.
“You as well.” My own smile grew. “I missed you.”
The brief burst of panic I felt with the admission was quickly doused when he said, “And I you.” A rosy color infused his cheeks as he cleared his throat. “Shall we?”
He reached for the door handle. His fingers brushed mine before I dropped my hand, and the brief contact sent a shiver of awareness through me. If the lord noticed my reaction, he didn’t make it known.
The gardens were quiet and still when we walked outside, as if the chill that hung in the air had frozen them in time.
We strolled some distance away from the palace, stopping before the rosebushes.
Lifting my eyes to the gray afternoon sky, I thought back to my dream.
Perhaps my mother was right, and my mind had been playing tricks on me, showing me the images of something that I craved.
Swallowing, I remembered the feel of Adrian’s arms around my waist and shivered again.
“Are you cold?” the lord asked next to me. If I told him I was, would he wrap his arms around me like he had in my dream?
“I’m all right,” I said quickly. “Do you think it will snow?”
“Maybe.” He studied the low-hanging clouds.
“It never snows in Emeraldia.” My words echoed in the quiet stillness. Adrian didn’t acknowledge them, and truly, there was nothing to say. We both knew what snow would bring with it, or, rather, what it would take away—hope.
“Let’s practice,” he said instead, shifting his gaze to the rosebushes before us. “Try to breathe new life into them.” He gestured at the white rose blossoms that had shriveled up from the cold.
I reached for the wilting stems, carefully avoiding the prickly thorns, and called upon my magic.
After a moment’s delay, it began rising to the surface of the well inside me.
My powers climbed higher and higher until they overflowed, spilling over the rim and saturating my entire being.
Like lightning, the surge of magic traveled from the center of my chest down my arm, and then to my fingertips, where they were touching the rose bush.
My skin tingled as the power seeped out through my pores into the plant.
The limp branches lifted first, and the shriveled-up leaves quickly followed, unfurling into oval, sharply toothed leaflets.
When my magic finally reached the blossoms, the dry and brown edges turned back to white with a hint of pink, the sets of petals opening up as if to take a full breath of their new life.
“Nicely done!” Adrian smiled. “The progress you’ve made over the past two weeks is remarkable.”
Coaxing my magic out still required a significant effort on my part, but the task had been becoming increasingly easier to accomplish with each passing day.
At times, I used my emotions to bring my powers forth.
When I did, Adrian was always quick to remind me that doing so was not the ideal way.
“Thank you. I couldn’t have done it without you. ”
“I don’t believe that’s true. Your magic had always been there. You’re the one who found a way to set it free.”
“I couldn’t have done it without your guidance.” I placed a hand on his arm and squeezed lightly to emphasize my words.
Adrian covered my hand with his. “I was happy to help.”
“Do you think soon I will be strong enough to reinforce the wards?” I asked for what felt like a hundredth time.
“Maybe,” he said softly, running his thumb over my hand in soothing circles. “You need to be—”
“Patient, I know,” I interjected. My tone was bitter, even though I knew that I wasn’t ready.
I only had control over my powers for short periods once I had managed to bring them forth.
If I hoped to make any real difference on the border, I needed to truly harness my magic.
“How do you remain so calm when you live so close to the border?”
“Living in a constant state of fear is not living at all. Try to cast your trepidation aside tonight and enjoy the festivities.” He lifted his other hand to my face and lightly touched his fingertips to my cheek. “We will leave tomorrow morning to return to Zalie and resume your training.”
I was looking forward to it. Since there had been no incidents on the border in the past two weeks, my father couldn’t insist that I stay in the capital.
I had missed my family and my quarters at the palace, but I wasn’t happy to be back.
An oppressive feeling had descended on me when I had returned here, and I couldn’t shake it off no matter how hard I tried.
“I’m nervous about the ball,” I admitted, swallowing thickly.
“Why?” Adrian frowned before it dawned on him. “Your former fiancé will be in attendance.” I nodded. “You have no reason to be nervous. I will dance with you all night if you let me.”
“Do you promise?” I breathed.
“I do.” His gaze dropped to my mouth as he glided his fingertips down my cheek before skimming his thumb under my bottom lip. The corset of my dress became inexplicably tight as he lowered his head.