22. Chapter 22
22
I paced back and forth, anticipation mounting with each hurried step as I waited not only for Levon but also for the foreboding journey to the King's Court.
I glanced out the large crystal windows, seeing several maids and footmen bustling about, carrying food baskets to our totes and trunks. Kaizen conversed with two burly guards, gesturing toward the distant mountains, their nods implying agreement.
"You look more like yourself in those clothes," Levon's voice startled me, and I spun around to find him descending the stairs. "But I must admit, you were breathtaking in that dress last night."
I shook my head, attempting to conceal the rose creeping up my neck and suppress the turmoil of feelings churning in my stomach. With a sigh, I walked toward him as he extended his arm, praying he was finally going to give me the truth.
He guided me toward the long hallway to the small sunroom but stopped at a large painting that occupied more than half of the wall. A stunning ebony-skinned lady with long brown hair was caught mid-twirl, her dress flowing behind her in an elegant cascade of dusted sparkles. Her closed, smiling eyes gleamed brightly, reflecting the familiar face guiding me.
I had never taken the time to admire it or notice its beauty and…familiarity.
"Your…mother?" I breathed. He gave a shallow nod, a brief smile mirroring the lady in the painting. "She's beautiful."
"She was," he said with sadness.
I lifted my eyes to meet his despite the shadow of her presence lingering in his mind. He offered a quick smile and released my arm, running his hand down the side of the golden-rimmed frame. A latch clicked, and he gestured for me to step back. With a fluid motion, he swung the painting open, revealing a small wooden door, its surface recently polished. I gave him a questioning look as he pushed the door open and guided me inside before closing the painting behind us.
The air grew cold and murky as we descended the spiral stone staircase, reminiscent of the one leading down to the kitchen. The only illumination came from faint glows emanating from bits of broken crystal and glass embedded in the walls, reflecting the sunlight or perhaps the luminescence of moonbugs—I couldn't discern which. Yet, the effect was undeniably magical. It felt like we were traveling through stardust, the passageway speckled with countless shades of blue that shimmered and flowed around us, creating an ethereal, otherworldly atmosphere. The light danced on the stone steps, casting a gentle glow that guided our way, transforming the descent into an enchanting fable.
"What is this place?" I rasped, struggling to contain my wonder.
"A part of me that I hold very dear," he replied, his gaze locking with mine as we continued our descent.
His eyes seemed to shimmer more vibrantly than they did in the sunlight. He must have sensed my amazement, for he flashed me a playful smile as we reached the bottom step. The room enveloped us in a radiant glow emanating from swirling shards of luminous stones that seemed alive .
A towering stack of books and scrolls stood along one wall while a grand tarnished mirror adorned the opposite side. Its reflection danced off the stones and illuminated the entire space with captivating brilliance.
Another shelf held an array of trinkets and oddities, slowly gathering dust. At the center of the spacious alcove, a large stone jutted out from the surrounding rocks, cradling a shimmering copper box so snugly it seemed inseparable, like a mother holding her child.
"What's that?" I asked, pointing at it. The sight was unlike anything I'd ever seen—the flowing electricity of the box drew me in, tempting me to twirl as Levon's mother had.
"Something I hope will one day see the true light again," he responded cryptically.
"You're speaking in riddles," I remarked, feeling annoyed. "I thought you were going to tell me the truth," I stated, folding my arms.
He responded only with a pearly grin before leading me to the mirror, which was far grander than it initially appeared. Its frame was intricately adorned with silver threads resembling vines, and tiny crystals glowed the same blue as the fragments surrounding us.
"Look. What do you see?" he prompted.
I gazed at my reflection, noticing that my eyes almost mirrored the brilliant blue hues surrounding us and that I appeared leaner and healthier for the first time in my life. My dark auburn hair seemed to radiate with greater intensity, its reds swirling—
"Am I supposed to see something?" I interrupted, growing irritated.
"Look deeper," he urged, stepping up close behind me. I resisted the urge to lean into his warmth, especially considering the chill of the air down here, visible in the wisps of my breath. He closed the distance between us, his hand lightly resting on my forearm as he looked into the mirror. He leaned into my ear. "Find what you do not see," he whispered, his breath caressing down my neck, sending pulsing waves of heat cascading through me, unsure how to feel standing this close to him.
I peered deeper into the tarnished mirror, acutely aware of his proximity—so close it was intoxicating. His hand slid down into mine, and I couldn't help but notice the faint remnants of yellowing bruises on his face, now fading into mere whispers of the incident I still couldn't understand.
However, his eyes shone brighter than ever, mirroring the same vibrant hue as the blues around us and somehow—somehow…like mine, glowing .
I blinked to dispel the confusion, then swiftly turned towards him to meet his gaze. His eyes still reflected the swirling blues of the room, though not as vibrant as they appeared in the mirror. Glancing back at the mirror and then returning my gaze to him, I noticed the stark difference.
His lips curled into a subtle smile, barely revealing his teeth, and it dawned on me just how close we had become. I sucked in a sharp breath, feeling the heat spread across my face, neck, and ears.
"You see it," he whispered, his grip tightening on my hand.
"I…I'm not entirely sure what I see," I admitted, my gaze sweeping over the shimmering blues within the small alcove. "What is this place? And please, spare me the riddles."
"This place is made from everything that reminds me of home," he replied softly. "I made it solely on my own."
His mother's face flashed in my mind, her image mirroring the sparkling patterns surrounding us, reminiscent of those on the painting. The vibrant hues of the paint were unlike anything I had seen before; a place like this must have cost a fortune.
Shaking my head, I stepped away from him. "And how is this," I asked, gesturing to our surroundings. "Supposed to reveal the truth to me?"
He looked down, swallowing hard before clearing his throat.
"Eliah, when I called you my queen last night, it wasn't to prove a point to my friends. You are my Regina ," he confessed, quickly inhaling a sharp breath and turning his back to me. His gaze was fixed on the mirror with a somber expression.
"I first saw you in a market by the Fernwen seaside. You looked sick," he paused, recollecting the memory with sadness. "And so thin," he continued, running his hands through his short hair before facing me again. "Your hair was tied back in a long braid, and you wore a white floral dress that was far too big. You stumbled over your feet. You clung to Calum, pleading for him to stay as he and Jesri left you alone by the carriage while they traversed the markets cavorting with pleasure." He settled his rising voice as his jaw fluttered with an anger I hadn't seen before.
"You kept your head down, swaying as you nervously twisted your dress between your fingers. Your eyes were swollen from crying. You stayed by the carriage, wiping your face," he paused, a subtle smile crossing his face as if the memory of me still vividly played in his mind.
"Once they were out of sight, you straightened your shoulders and left the carriage, slipping away before the footman could notice. Wiping your tears away, you transformed into someone resilient and headstrong. I trailed behind you to the beach, where you kicked off your boots, burying your feet in the sand, inhaling the salty air eagerly. You absorbed everything around you—the view, the sounds, the soft sand underfoot. Your hair fluttered in the wind as you started twirling, just as my mother always did. You danced and splashed, matching the rhythm of the rise and fall of the sea foam, and laughed for joy," he smiled, looking up into my eyes, sending my heart swirling with emotion. "You brought a smile to my lips for the first time in ages."
He approached me, gently clasping my hands and tracing his thumb over my knuckles. "I was still in the royal guard back then. Life wasn't easy, but I knew—I knew I had to find you . Someday, somehow, I would meet you—help you. Ensure you never had to shed tears for whatever unpleasantness Jesri or Calum brought upon you."
A glint of silver shimmered in his eyes as he cupped my face in his hands, prompting my own tears. "Eliah, what I did…I had no choice," he faltered. "Once I realized it was Lord Jesri in the tavern that night, I couldn't bear the thought of losing you." A solitary tear trailed down his cheek that he quickly brushed away as he fought back the emotions.
"At first, Jesri believed me to only be a boy, being only in my late teens and crudely dismissed me until he saw the royal insignia on my uniform. He was apologetic and bought me a drink, where he then drunkenly confessed everything to me—every detail of his degrading treatment of you, his intention to sell you like a commodity to all those hungry powered men, with hideous plans and expose you to who knows what horrors. So, I took action. I made sure he agreed to let me train you once you were ready, and I dangled the bone, letting him know I was leaving the Royal Guard and was looking to be in a similar business. I divulged what the king had revealed about hosting a Match unlike any other, and it sent Jesri drooling," he gritted his teeth, his jaw fluttering.
"It kept him tethered to me as he insisted on information, hungry to know when things would be ready. I attempted to intervene early, proposing to train you. Still, he refused, wanting himself to be the one who taught and trained you, in hopes that it would attract enough attention for the king to notice. He grew hostile towards my persistence, so I ceased and maintained a mask of cooperation," he paused abruptly, his fist clenching.
"I never anticipated the capacity of his cruelty towards you, and I deeply regret not finding a way to retrieve you sooner, to liberate you by any means necessary. But I saw no alternative," he confessed, tears streaming down his face, mingling with mine as they fell onto the cold, unforgiving stone floor. "I wanted nothing more than to confront him, but I had to continue to play the part and maintain the illusion of being the partner he believed me to be."
We stood there in silence as my heart trembled, gazing into his eyes, which brimmed with regret and sorrow. I tried to summon the memory of dancing by the sea, but it was overshadowed by the rush of thoughts stirred by his story—by the truth .
"I don't let people know about my past," he murmured softly, his voice carrying a vulnerability that tugged at my heartstrings. "I don't let them glimpse the shattered pieces inside of me. To see the struggle it is to piece myself back together just to navigate this world that was never ours."
His hand, still cradling my face, tightened gently as he drew closer, his breath warm against my skin. "But you, Eliah…Sabene," he paused, on my middle name, his eyes turned somber. "You are not just anyone. You are my queen, now and forever, and I would be honored if you'd have me."
Tears flowed freely down my cheeks as my heart expanded with a turmoil of feelings that rippled through me unchecked.
"Why me?" I breathed, leaning into his rough hand.
He met my gaze, his touch gentle as he brushed away the tears from my cheeks.
"Because I made a promise long ago," he began, his voice a whisper carried on the weight of sincerity. "A vow to be a good man, to protect, to show kindness, and I have traversed every mountain, every valley, desert, and continent to ensure it."
We gazed at each other and felt the despair of our desires to simply be who we were—without acting or having the shackles of others' dreams weighing us down.
More tears flowed freely, a poignant reminder of how deeply I yearned for the naiveness of childhood, where the belief of being loved and remembered was unquestioned.
He gently brushed away my tears, his touch soothing the rawness within. "I never knew my parents, and I've harbored resentment towards them for it. They made me believe that from the very start, I was nothing and would amount to nothing. Jesri reinforced that belief, and Calum…he never fought for me," I lamented.
I let out a frustrated exhale. "I accepted what was handed to me because I convinced myself I deserved it. No matter how much it angered me, I played the role I was expected to play. Always performing, always striving to please, and never truly being able to be who I—what I—" My words faltered, lost in the tangled web of uncertainty and longing.
His confession had stirred something deep within me, a confusing mix of hope and fear, anger and desire. It was as if all the emotions I had suppressed for so long came rushing to the surface, overwhelming me. I felt my chest tighten, my heart pounding with disbelief and yearning. The weight of his words, calling me his queen, was almost too much to bear. How could I ever be loved?
My mind raced with memories of all the times I had doubted myself, all the moments I had felt unworthy. Yet, his words chipped away at the walls I had built around my heart, threatening to expose the vulnerable core I had kept hidden for so long. Tears welled in my eyes, and I fought to keep my composure, unsure if I was ready to let someone in completely.
Levon lifted my hand to his shoulder while his other hand clasped mine, drawing me close.
We swayed together in silence, moving as the glowing river of colors surrounded us. With only the sound of our intertwined heartbeats, I found solace in his embrace, a moment of rest from the turmoil within.
"My mother used to say that the music of dance could soothe the mind and soul," he murmured softly.
His touch ignited a fire within me, warming my heart as it spread beneath my skin. I felt the strength in his hand on my back, the roughness of his calloused fingers against mine.
Leaning in, he pressed his forehead against mine, and in an instant, all the anger, hatred, and resentment I held for him melted away, replaced by a newfound understanding, a shared truth.
"I hope one day you'll discover yourself, Eliah," he whispered, his voice tender and sincere. "And perhaps your parents did wish the best for you. Maybe the circumstances they left you in were better than their own."
Sadness flickered within me, and I was unwilling to accept such a notion. Yet his words planted a seed of doubt, a tiny glimmer of hope that perhaps there was more to my story than I had ever dared to imagine. That I was more than all this. But how could anyone want me if even my own parents, the people who are supposed to love you unconditionally didn't even want me?
" I want you, Eliah Sabene," he declared huskily, drawing me closer as his hands encircled my waist.
I lifted my gaze to his, confused about how he knew just what to say, and took a deep breath, the cool air filling my lungs, its crispness a stark contrast to the heat of my racing heart. My mind raced between the desire to believe his words and the fear of what that belief might bring.
Could I trust him? Could I allow myself to believe in his words?
The warmth of his touch stirred a desperate yearning for connection and truth within me. I longed to trust him, but the weight of past betrayals and the haunting memories of twisted truths held me back, leaving me vulnerable. His eyes, filled with intensity and sincerity, seemed to promise a different future—one where I could finally be who I truly was.
We paused our swaying, the energy between us crackling like sparks dancing in the vibrant glow surrounding us. His touch sent shivers down my spine, burning a trail of warmth along my arm that seemed to set my skin ablaze. My cheeks flushed, the heat spreading to my neck and ears as his hand traced a delicate path up to my jawline.
"I don't know if I'm worth wanting," I breathed less than a whisper.
A tender smile curved his lips, his gaze unwavering as he gently lifted my chin. "Eliah," he murmured, his voice brimming with sincerity. "You're worth every journey across oceans and worlds, every moment until this one. You're worth it all."
My breath hitched as our breaths mingled. His thumb traced my lips, shooting stars into my vision as time seemed to pause. He looked down at my mouth, then back into my eyes, silently pleading, yearning. Flames surged through me, stinging my ears and cheeks as if they were alight with fire that melted away all logical sense.
He cradled my face in his strong, callused hands, each rough edge telling a story of his past sorrows and desires, all centering on me. His beautiful eyes blurred together as his lips brushed mine, setting my entire being ablaze with a fire much different from how I felt with Calum.
In an instant, his touch turned rigid, the tenderness replaced by a sudden tension that gripped his frame. With a sharp intake of breath, he swiftly pulled away, dropping his hands as his gaze darted towards the stairs with an urgency that set my heart racing.
I followed his line of sight as my eyes locked with Kaizen's, who was radiating fury and seemed ready to attack.