Chapter 32 Ripley
Ripley
The break room is quiet now that everyone has left for the holiday.
It smells like bleach and lemon wood shine.
The harsh fluorescent lights hurt my eyes as I stare at the picture on my phone, my thumb hesitating as I debate exiting Instagram, but I can’t do it.
It’s a picture of my dad, his new wife and their nine-month-old baby, who I’ve never met – my little brother.
I bite the nail of my free hand, a weird rushing filling my ears.
They’re on vacation in Hawaii. One neither Anna nor I was invited to.
Not that I would have been able to go with the filming, but still. It would have been nice to be asked, at least.
‘What are you still doing here?’ I glance up to see Garrick leaning against the doorframe to the break room. ‘Don’t you have some stockings to hang by the chimney with care?’ His hair is messy, cheeks red from scrubbing off his stage make-up.
I look at the time and see it’s just past eight. I came here after we finished shooting, and I’ve been working on school stuff, so I didn’t realize it was so late. Also, that explains the ache in my stomach – I’m starving. It has nothing to do with the pictures I was looking at.
‘I don’t have a chimney, so no decking the halls.
’ I place my phone on the table, ignoring the sting left in my chest, and focus on a more enjoyable sight.
Although I’ve seen him most of the day, we didn’t get a chance to talk, with everything going on both with Beeloved and FTG’s final push before Christmas.
Garrick is dressed casually in gray joggers, a white T-shirt and a zip-up teddy bear brown fuzzy jacket.
‘My halls have been decked for a month.’ He lingers near the door, and my body twitches, trying to stay in my chair when all I want to do is kiss him again.
To make the world disappear for just a moment.
I’m a thinker, a doer, a to-do-lister, but when I’m with Garrick those things melt away and my brain has a chance to breathe for the first time in forever.
I didn’t know how much I needed that. I’m like the person who didn’t realize how thirsty they were until the first sip of water, then they can’t get enough.
Which would probably result in them drinking too much liquid and throwing up – sounds about right for the end of this metaphor about Garrick.
‘We don’t really do Christmas,’ I admit, picking at a chip in the table.
‘Seriously? Not even a Charlie Brown tree?’ His shocked face stays put until he slides into the chair next to me, then it switches to a tinge of sadness in his eyes.
I glance around the break room filled with holiday cheer – a paper Christmas tree on the wall with everyone’s name and what they want for Christmas.
There is a real tree too, glittering in the corner with sparkly lights.
It’s nice. Maybe that’s why I chose to study here and not in the apartment.
Mom is working on the next episode in her makeshift office, so I didn’t want to be alone.
‘We used to do Christmas before my parents divorced, but then Mom got too busy, and my dad was off making a new family.’ I bite my cheek, eyes darting up to his, waiting to see the pity. It’s there, but it doesn’t make me feel pathetic; it makes me feel seen.
He slides his hand over mine. It’s warm and comforting. ‘I’m sorry, Juliet. Holidays are tough when everyone’s not together.’
God, I feel like a jerk. ‘Garrick, I-I shouldn’t be complaining. I’m sorry.’
He squeezes my hand. ‘Hey, don’t do that. Just because your pain is different doesn’t mean it isn’t there. We’re both miserable, just in different ways.’ He cracks a small smile, which I mimic.
‘What a cheerful bunch we are.’
He leans forward, brushing hair behind my ear.
That ache in my stomach is now a thousand butterflies.
‘I don’t know. I’m feeling pretty cheerful right about now.
’ He doesn’t break eye contact, and it makes my chest warm.
My logical side tells me to turn away – to get up and leave before this turns into something more.
But boy, oh boy, do I want the more.
My mouth is full of cotton balls, the single word getting stuck. ‘Garrick?’
‘Juliet?’ My name on his lips vibrates across my skin.
‘Kiss me?’ It’s a question we know the correct answer to – no.
But we both say yes.
He leans in, lips brushing mine in the barest of kisses, and it’s everything I’ve been playing in my mind the last two days.
It’s better. It’s worse. Because I know I’ll never get enough.
I forget about the world outside the room – forget my parents, who never have enough time for me. Garrick and I are all that exists.
The kiss is interrupted too soon when someone clears their throat by the door. We spring apart to see Desiree standing there, arms crossed, a wicked smile on her face. ‘Well, well, well, what do we have here?’
‘It’s not –’ I start.
‘– what it looks like,’ Garrick finishes.
I’m mortified. My cheeks are scarlet from the embarrassment seeping through me. What the heck was I thinking?
‘It looks like we have a new entry into the competition.’ Brett steps past Desiree and into the room.
‘I thought you all left?’ Garrick deflects.
Desiree shrugs. ‘I’m waiting for my parents to come get me. But this isn’t about me.’ She looks us over, and then turns to Brett. ‘What are we going to do about this?’
Brett shakes his head with an exaggerated sigh, like he’s not freaking loving this. ‘I don’t think the public would like to know that Garrick Walton, of Fairytale Gardens fame, is actually just a cheater. And that the daughter of the Beeloved founder is responsible for the sabotage.’
‘That’s not fair,’ I say. My heart pounding against my rib cage feels like it’s trying to make a run for it. Could there be any two worse people to have walked in right now? ‘It was …’ What was it? What do I want it to be?
‘What do you want?’ Garrick asks, cool as a freaking cucumber.
‘Look,’ Desiree answers. ‘I don’t really care that you two are making out. But I might be alone in that.’
‘It’ll be your word against ours,’ I counter.
‘Not exactly. Show them, Brett.’
Brett holds up his phone and there’s a photo of Garrick and I in his apartment from the night we made the cooking video. I have my hand on his chest while I un-mic him; he’s gazing at me with a soft smile. Desiree must have taken it when she came over with Nathan.
Crap. That doesn’t look good.
‘I’d hate for this photo to find its way to the media.’ Brett puts the phone back into his pocket. ‘Along with the story of how Juliet Ripley has been orchestrating this to take down her mother’s company out of jealousy.’
My mouth falls open in shock at the utter audacity of this man. ‘That’s a blatant lie. I thought you wanted to work with Beeloved. Why would you try to destroy it?’
‘I’m an enterprising guy. I saw an opportunity.’
Desiree places a hand on his arm to make him stop talking. ‘We don’t want to get anyone in trouble, but we need some assurances to make it worth our while to stay quiet. So, why don’t we make a deal? I’ll keep your dirty little secret, if you give me more airtime on the show.’
‘Seriously?’ My eyes narrow in disbelief. She’s already one of the girls with the most screen time.
She pulls on the sleeves of her pink sweater. ‘Yeah, I need the exposure for my acting career.’
Of course. But whatever, I need to fix this. ‘OK, fine.’ My heart is still raging, but at least the start of a plan makes my synapses stop firing in overdrive. ‘Brett, what do you want?’
Garrick holds up his hand. ‘Are you extorting us?’
‘I think it’s more like blackmail,’ I say, trying to keep the panic out of my voice.
This is so freaking bad. I already got warned about being too close to Garrick, and then I go and make out with him in a public space.
What has happened to my brain? I’m usually way smarter than this. Risk aversion is my number one ally.
Brett taps his chin like he’s got to think really hard about not being a total jerk and making up a story to sell to the highest bidder. ‘You have to put in a good word for me to Ms Ripley. Tell her how invaluable I’ve been to this whole thing.’
I clench my fists so tight my nails dig into my skin. ‘All right.’
Desiree and Brett share an infuriating smile of victory. ‘So, we have a deal?’
I glance at Garrick. He licks his lips, and my stomach flips.
Ripley, chill.
‘We do,’ I relent because we don’t have a choice.
Satisfied with their Grinch act, they leave happy.
‘Well, that went unexpectedly.’ Garrick chuckles. Way too chill for my liking.
I shove my phone into my bag, collecting my things from the table as I stand, knee banging into it with a burst of pain. ‘We’re extremely lucky those two can be bought.’
‘But they were.’ He hands me my computer. ‘It’s all good.’ His lack of concern is frustrating.
‘We can’t do that again.’ I shoulder my heavy backpack, trying not to look at him directly. My knees are already weak; I don’t know if I can stand on solid ground if I do.
‘That’s what you said last time.’ He cracks that stupid, handsome smile.
I straighten my back, holding my chin high in defiance. ‘Well, this time I mean it.’
As much as I wish I did, I absolutely do not mean it.