37. Annie
Annie
“You look stunning,” Marcy says, sitting on the edge of my bed.
She’s helping me get ready before the gala tonight. With all the past dates and ramping up to the end of the contract, we haven’t seen each other as often as we normally would.
“You have to say that, you’re my best friend,” I say over my shoulder as I look at myself in the mirror.
This dress is out of my comfort zone. It’s lower in the back than I would normally like and the way it hugs my stomach is just enough for me to notice it.
The urge to pull at the fabric piles up, but I take a breath, try to push it down, and remember why I chose this dress.
When I tried it on, I knew nothing would compare.
It immediately reminded me of the first night with Zayn, attending as his fake date to our first gala.
The event that truly started this insane relationship.
Then, when Zayn entered the dressing room and his eyes fell on me, it made me feel like I was being seen, truly seen.
Not just as people-pleasing Annie, but real-me Annie.
Marcy walks up to me from behind and hugs me. “You look stunning, I swear. And you’re going to have the best night. Okay? Don’t think about work.”
“This is kind of work, though. That’s going to be hard.”
“You know what I mean.” She squeezes me once before letting go. “I’m going to head home since you’ll be leaving soon. I can’t wait to see pictures. I love you!” Marcy yells as she leaves the room.
I return my attention to the mirror, sighing again at the sight. I know I look good, I do, but I’m also... overwhelmed? I don’t know. It’s all a lot. My job. Zayn. Tonight. My future. Everything.
I don’t even realize I’m crying until Zayn’s appears and swipes a tear off my cheek.
He presses a kiss where the tear was, and all I can do is stare at him in the mirror and let more tears fall.
“I can call to cancel, we don’t have to go,” Zayn whispers in my ear while pushing strands of my hair behind the other ear.
“We do, it’s work. It’s important.”
“You’re important,” Zayn argues, pulling me into his arms.
I pause and breathe him in, his presence alone calming me.
“I want to go. I want to dance with you.”
“We can dance right here, Princess, we don’t need a fancy event for that.” He presses a kiss to my forehead.
I don’t know why his ex decided to say no to his proposal, but I’m thanking the universe she did. How did I find someone who not only encourages and supports me, but also is willing to do whatever to make me happy? And what am I going to do when this is all over? Because it has to be over, right?
“But,” Zayn continues, “if that’s what you want, then we can go.”
“Just give me a few minutes to freshen up, okay? Then we can head out.”
“Okay, I’ll make us a snack for the road.” My stomach grumbles as soon as he says snack, and my hand moves to cover the noise.
Zayn presses one more kiss on my forehead and whispers, “You’re beautiful, no matter what that voice says inside your head,” before walking to the living room.
It only takes me a few minutes to calm myself, and I spend a few more touching up my makeup. After one more look over, I decide that it’s good enough and head out to the living room.
“Okay, I’m ready,” I say as I approach Zayn, who is hunched over the island.
When he stands to face me, I see what he’s wearing. I don’t know how I didn’t see it before. The dark green three-piece suit is beautiful.
“We match,” I say, smiling at his appearance.
“I don’t want anyone to mistake you for someone else’s,” he says. “You sure you still want to go? It’s not too late to back out.”
I nod. “Yes, I’m sure. It’s good that we are going. Plus, Todd might miss you if we aren’t there.”
Todd and Zayn have been meeting regularly since he rejoined the board. It’s been nice to see Zayn excited for something besides the trilogy. I think that him joining the board gave him a renewed purpose and Todd has helped tremendously with the transition.
“He’d live,” Zayn says. He hands me my coat. “But I am excited for tonight, surprisingly. It’s been a while since I’ve felt like this.”
This meaning what’s going on between us? This meaning the gala? This meaning what? Instead of asking, I smile at him, wrap my arm in his, and pull us toward the door.
“Cassie and Emmett will be there too,” Zayn says as we reach the car.
“Really? She didn’t tell me that,” I say, surprised because Cassie tells me everything.
Zayn nods and says, “I thought it’d be fun to do another double date kind of thing.”
“A double date kind of thing?”
“Don’t make me regret this,” Zayn says, holding open the door for me.
Zayn slides in after me and immediately laces our hands together.
“Thank you,” is all I say, not knowing how to show that him thinking about me in the slightest means everything.
“Anything for you, Princess.” He squeezes my hand and gives me a look that says a million words.
When we get to the venue, Zayn holds my hand as we walk down the red carpet. Lights shine on us from every direction, from cameras to streetlights.
“Zayn, Zayn, care to answer a question for us?” A reporter yells as we walk.
“Sure, what’s up?” Zayn stops, switching to have his hand around my arm instead of interlaced with mine.
“There are rumors that you may be cast in an upcoming trilogy.”
“Is there a question in that?” Zayn asks, and my eyes widen in horror at how he just responded to the reporter. But luckily they both laugh it off and my shoulders ease. Just a little bit.
“Yes, yes. Do you feel like you have a chance in landing the role?”
“Yes,” Zayn answers immediately. “If you would have asked me four months ago, I would have told you the same thing, but it wouldn’t have been true. I didn’t deserve the role then, but now... now I have something worth fighting for.”
I meet Zayn’s gaze and my thoughts swirl in my head, wondering how I’ll be able to let him go when I’ve fallen hard for him.
“Great, thank you, and Annie, question for you if you don’t mind?”
“Oh, uh,” I look at Zayn to see if I should answer the question or just say no, but he simply nods. “Go ahead.”
“It seems that you are great at what you do if you brought Zayn back to the living—no offense.” He looks at Zayn.
“None taken, it’s true.” Zayn shrugs.
The reporter continues, “Do you have any idea what’s next for you? Who would be lucky enough to have you in their corner?”
“I’m not sure yet, but when I do, you’ll be the second person to know,” I tease, trying not to show that the fact that I might have to move to New York is looming over me.
“Great, thank you both.”
We both nod, then Zayn pulls me toward the front door of the venue. The inside is decorated with a mix of auburn and burnt orange. A live band plays soft jazz as everyone finds their seats.
It doesn’t take me long to spot Cassie and Emmett because Cassie is running toward me as Emmett trails behind.
“Look at us, our first event together.” Cassie beams, pulling me into a hug.
“We have been at plenty of events together,” I note, rolling my eyes as she pulls me toward our table.
“Yes, but you were always working.”
“I am working tonight, too,” I argue.
Zayn pulls out my chair for me to sit down, which I don’t think anyone has ever done for me before.
“It’s a different kind of work,” Zayn says as he plops down next to me.
“That is true, it doesn’t feel like work.”
“See,” Cassie chimes back in. “So, this is different. I hope they have ginger tea, because I am feeling a little meh tonight.”
“Tonight?” Emmett quips.
“Most nights.” Cassie shrugs.
She’s about two months into her pregnancy and she’s been texting our group chats with updates that I would have been better off not seeing to begin with.
“Anyway,” I say. “I love that you two are here, with us.”
“Us too.” Cassie smiles.
Eventually, dinner is served and the conversation starts to flow. Emmett moves to sit by Zayn, the two of them laughing and catching up on some topic while Cassie updates me on all things baby.
“They are getting along well,” Cassie whispers to me, nodding to the boys.
“Have you two never talked to Zayn on set?”
Cassie shakes her head. “No, not on set. We talked over lunch sometimes when he’d sit with all of us. And even though everything he was cast in did well, especially the indie films, we didn’t cross paths. We typically worked out of different areas.”
“And Zayn and Emmett connected because of Logan?” I would have assumed having the same agent would have led to some sort of connection between them.
“Kind of. Logan was the reason why Zayn first landed a role at the studio. But after that, Emmett and Zayn hung out a little bit on set or at lunch, like I said, but when they started to get closer, that’s when everything happened with Zayn. ”
That makes sense, I suppose. But still, it makes me sad that Zayn didn’t feel like he had anyone to talk to about anything. And that the people he was mutual friends with because of Marissa, abandoned him when he was at his lowest.
“He’s lucky to have you, you know.” Cassie grabs and squeezes my hand.
“She’s right,” Zayn whispers in my ear and I almost, almost, jump and hit him because I did not know he was listening.
I swivel around to face him and grab his face, pulling his lips to mine in a kiss.
When we pull apart, I keep his stare as I whisper, “I’m the one that’s lucky.”
Zayn is about to respond but is interrupted by Todd.
“Zayn, I’m glad to see you two here.”
Zayn pulls away from me and stands up, shaking Todd’s hand.
“We are happy to be here.”
“You’ll be at the club event, right? I thought I saw an RSVP come in for that.”
“Yes, wouldn’t miss it,” Zayn confirms.
“Will James be there?” I ask.
“Of course. James wouldn’t miss it, and they’ll be excited to hear that you’ll be there. They’ve told me you haven’t been around the office much lately. I think they miss you,” Todd says, enveloping me in a hug.
“Well, tell James I miss them too, and we’ll catch up soon.”
“I will,” Todd says with a warm smile, then glances around the room. “Alright, I should go mingle. I’ll catch you two later.”
Zayn says goodbye and sits next to me.
“You look beautiful,” he leans over to tell me.
“You’ve already told me that.” I glare in his direction.
“And I’ll keep telling you, so get used to it.” Zayn pinches my side, causing me to squeal and jerk to the right.
“Are you two doing anything for Thanksgiving?” Emmett asks.
Oh, shit. I forgot Thanksgiving is next week. We have the charity event and then fly to see his parents the next day for two nights.
“We are going to my parents,” Zayn says.
“Will your siblings be there?” Cassie asks, pretending her question is innocent.
“They both will be, yes.”
“Ah, interesting,” Cassie drawls.
If it wouldn’t be obvious, I’d roll my eyes and shove her shoulder just to show how annoyed I am that she asked that. She will be texting me later about it, I can almost guarantee it.
I’m thankful when dinner arrives because that means less interrogation.
I know Cassie is trying to look out for me and play the part of older sister, but I need her to let me handle all this.
I don’t want to know if she’s judging me for my actions or disapproves of Zayn and I.
I don’t get the feeling that she does, but it’s hard to talk about how I’m actually feeling because no one truly understands.
If I told Cassie about my dilemma, she’d be on my side.
She’d want me to take the job in New York, but she’d also want me to try and make it work with Zayn.
And I don’t know how that’s possible. I couldn’t do that to him, not when he’s starting to find himself again.
Our schedules would never align, with him starting to act in the movie and me needing to go to event after event for a new client.
I know how busy I am with Zayn. So, when I picture that times two, I don’t know how I could manage that and fly across the country each time.
If we did try long distance, I could see us making it a little while.
Having dates over video calls and sending gifts.
But over time, one of us would resent the other, or we’d slowly unravel because we don’t have time for one another.
It’s not that we wouldn’t make the other a priority, but there’s only so many hours in the day and when we are hundreds of miles apart. .. we’d never make it.
And that’s why I wear a smile for the rest of the night when secretly my heart is shattering into a million pieces.