Chapter 11 A Sindecent Proposal
A Sindecent Proposal
I’m not sure how I managed to concentrate with his fingers dancing across my knee.
But somehow, a snap plan occurred to me.
Problem: Need to lose my virginity.
Proposed Solution: Find someone to have safe, emotionally unattached sex with.
Test: Have sex with Hudson.
Result: Some potentially amazing virginity-losing shenanigans?
“I have an idea,” I said, breathless.
“Yeah?”
“Would you…How would you feel about a trade?”
His fingers paused on my knee. “I’m listening.”
“If you still want those sex toy lessons, then I’ll give them to you. And in exchange, we should have sex.”
The air between us pulled—a bridge jumper’s cable about to snap and break our necks or rebound and send us soaring.
Hudson let out a long breath. His expression turned wolfish. “I think that’s a fair trade.”
“It only makes sense,” I said, trying to tamp down my swell of sentiment with good old-fashioned practical, scientific thinking. “I’ll get to know what sex is like, which can only improve the quality of The Fantasy. And you’ll know more about sex toys, which will achieve the same result.”
“You don’t need an excuse to do what you want, Scout,” he said, leaning closer. “You can just have it. You can just have me. If that’s what you want.”
“I do.”
“Good,” he said. Once again, those fingers did their dance across the skin of my thigh, awakening deep, primal lust in me. “Because I want you. You’re my type, too.”
“That’s so hard to believe,” I muttered.
Hudson’s gaze went flat, as if it was the height of stupidity not to think I was eminently bangable. “Haven’t I made it obvious?”
Obvious? I tried to think back over the last few weeks we’d known each other, examining them in a different light. Yeah, he’d held doors open for me. Gotten me cookies at the conference. Listened to me. Stood up for me at the airport. Accidentally kissed me.
And yes, sure, he’d gotten an erection during my talk at the sex toy convention. But that wasn’t…
He wasn’t…
My surprise made him shake his head.
“You clearly don’t know what you look like bent over a drafting table.”
He’d been ogling me in the office? He’d been lusting after me from afar like Mr. Kinkz-william Darcy?
“And,” he continued, “that kiss at the airport might not have been on purpose, but ever since, I’ve had a very hard time thinking about anything else.”
Wow. Maybe the Lloyd thing messed me up more than I originally thought. Had I really gotten so bad at realizing when someone was into me?
Or had I just been hiding from it?
Well. No more.
“Prove it,” I challenged.
“Gladly.”
In a single bound, he captured my cheeks with his big hands, and breathed in my surprised gasp as our lips touched.
Whoa. He wasn’t kidding. He does want me.
It had been so long since someone had touched me even remotely like that. Thank God my body acted on instinct.
Again, evolutionary programming at work.
Heart racing, I gripped at his rib cage with one hand and clutched the soft spot where his neck met his shoulder with the other, pulling him closer to me, deepening the kiss almost as soon as it began.
And I knew this was a bad idea, and that letting myself go after controlling myself so tightly for so long was a recipe for trouble and that I needed to shove him away and end this and never think about it again, but…
Clara was right. I’d been keeping myself from getting what I wanted. I was tired of it.
He tasted like spearmint and sex. I wanted more. This was what I’d been missing for the last few years. Maybe what I’d been missing forever. Kissing Lloyd Exeter was never like this.
When his tongue traced my bottom lip, I parted for him, wanting as much of this man as he would give.
Then my legs spread involuntarily, beckoning him closer. He pressed himself fully against me. My hips rolled, making contact with the hard evidence of his arousal.
“We have to stop,” I breathed.
Without hesitation, Hudson retreated. Before I had time to blink, he was off me—a full step away, hands at his sides. “Of course. I’m sorry. I didn’t—”
“I want to set some ground rules first.”
Not ground rules. Experiment parameters.
If I was going to have sex with Hudson, then the only way to keep myself safe was rules. Last time, I’d rushed headfirst into my whatever-it-was-but-definitely-not-an-affair with Lloyd Exeter. This time would be different. This time, I’d make sure a workplace fling didn’t affect me so deeply.
Making myself happy—but with guardrails.
The dimple returned to Hudson’s cheek. “Right. Okay. Yeah. Whatever you want.”
Whatever I wanted. What a strange concept. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d let myself have whatever I wanted.
The power was intoxicating. Here it was. Everything I’d wished for. A solution to my virginity predicament and an offer to get off with one of the hottest guys I’d ever seen. All mine for the taking.
How did I want it?
“I want a one-night stand,” I said, formulating on the fly. “No strings. Just take the virginity, thank you, have a nice day. Then we can focus on the sex toy lessons—absolutely no practical demonstrations. Can you do that?”
“Why? Don’t you like me?”
His tone was playful, but I was too single-minded to joke back.
“I get that I’m trying to expand my horizons or whatever, but I really can’t let this interfere with work. Besides, you’re leaving in six weeks.”
“We’re both pretty professional. We could keep the no-strings and keep having sex for six weeks.”
“My last coworker relationship didn’t end so well for me. I’m not interested in letting history repeat itself.”
He tipped his head. “Fair enough.”
“Have you been tested lately?”
Suddenly, he was the one who couldn’t meet my gaze. That worried me until he explained, “I’ve been in a dry patch. Dry country mile? Dry multistate highway? It’s been about a year and a half, but yeah. I test regularly anyway. They’ve all come back negative.”
“And I have the coil, if you want to go bare. Or we can use condoms.”
Hands drifted to my waist and pulled me in closer. Once again, I couldn’t ignore the press of his erection. It was as obvious as that little smirk he wore. “Condoms. Multiple. Isn’t she so confident about where this will go?”
“I’m only getting you for one night. I might as well make the most of it.”
“I’ll do my best to keep up. What about you? Condoms or without?”
My answer was irrational, but instinctive. “Without, please.”
His eyes flickered down to my mouth. I pressed one hand to his shoulder, holding him at cautious bay.
Get what you want. You deserve it.
“And I want to orgasm. Believe me, I love using my toys, but I want to know what it’s like to be made to orgasm by you.”
The words came out in a self-conscious rush. Hudson pressed a kiss to the apple of my cheek.
“Don’t worry. That won’t be a problem. I may not have a ton of experience in the toy department, but believe me: I am very, very eager to please. And to learn.”