17
THE DOORS OF THE ER made a whoosh sound as Sadie raced through them. James had dropped her off and was parking the car.
Her heart rate had gone through the ceiling when she’d received Moira’s text and had maintained that pace the entire drive to the hospital. All Moira’s text had said was that JoJo had taken a fall. That she was okay, but Sadie’s mind wasn’t willing to accept JoJo was fine until she could see for herself. James had quickly paid for the meals they didn’t even get to eat, thanked the restaurant staff for understanding, and the two of them had raced out the door. Sadie had tried to continue texting Moira on the way over for more information, but she knew that cell coverage inside the hospital was spotty at best.
The heels of her dress shoes clicked on the tile floor as she made her way to the main desk. With every step, visions of all the visits she and JoJo had already made in the past months flashed through her mind, a collage of snapshots of JoJo in wheelchairs, JoJo with IVs in her arm, the scent of rubbing alcohol and antiseptic making each memory that much more tangible.
She blinked away tears and tried to focus.
“Excuse me,” she said to the nurse behind the counter. “My aunt was brought in. Joanna Woods.”
The woman looked at her computer screen for a moment. “Yes. She’s…”
“Sadie!” Moira came around the corner, her presence cutting into what the nurse was saying.
Sadie hugged her friend, grateful for a friendly face. “Moira. How is she?”
Moira pulled back from their embrace and look at Sadie. “She’s fine. Gary is back there with her.”
Sadie blinked. Gary? Why would Gary be with JoJo?
One side of Moira’s mouth twitched up for a brief second as if in on a secret but wasn’t going to share.
Sadie shook her head. She’d come back to those thoughts in a moment. Right now, she needed to know what had happened to JoJo.
James came up behind her and placed a hand on her back. “Any news? What happened?”
“She’s fine.” Moira placed a hand on Sadie’s arm. “She tripped over something in her quilting room and landed on her wrist. It’s broken but they are getting it set and casted right now. She’ll be fine.”
Relief flooded Sadie’s system at the same time her mind raced over her aunt being alone and hurt without her there to help. And with all that JoJo had been through it turned Sadie’s stomach that she now had one more thing needing healing.
“You can go back and see her,” Moira said. “There can only be two of us at a time, so I came out to find you and tell you to go see her.”
James wrapped his arm around Sadie’s waist and gave a gentle squeeze with his hand. “You go. I’ll wait here.” He gave her a kiss on the side of her head.
Moira’s eyebrows lifted as she looked at Sadie then turned her attention to James. “I’ll join you.” She stepped to James’ other side and slipped a hand through his arm. “Come on. I know which coffee makers are the best ones. We can find a cup and sit and chat.”
Sadie’s eyes met James’. She gave him a soft nod to assure him she was okay. He squeezed her side again then slowly let go as if it was difficult for him to do so. However, with Moira on his other side urging him towards coffee, he didn’t have much choice.
As James and Moira made their way down the hall, the nurse behind the counter stood and said, “I’ll take you back there.”
“Thank you.”
Sadie followed the woman through a set of double doors down a hallway lined with small rooms with gurneys inside and barely enough space for someone to move around from one side to the other.
“She’s right in here.”
“Thank you,” Sadie said again as the woman nodded and went back to her post.
The door was cracked a little and Sadie peeked inside. JoJo was propped up in the bed, an IV drip in her arm and her wrist propped in her lap and wrapped heavily. Sadie stepped back for a moment, her breath catching, tears threatening to fall. Seeing JoJo in a hospital bed again caused all of Sadie’s fears and worries to rush over her like a tidal wave. The rational part of her brain that said all that had happened was a broken wrist couldn’t overpower the emotions that still came when she thought about losing her aunt. The only family she had left and the one person she’d relied on her entire life.
There was no way she could tell JoJo now about the financial problems they had. How could she possibly move JoJo out of the house, or even suggest the possibility? Her thoughts raced at the same pace as her heart.
She peered in again and saw Gary sitting at JoJo’s bedside, his hand holding JoJo’s uninjured one in his.
Sadie’s head tilted. What was that about? She knew JoJo and Gary were friends, but by the look in Gary’s eyes, the level of concern on his face, was there more to their relationship?
She knocked lightly on the door, then poked her head inside before stepping into the room.
JoJo looked at her, her eyes rimmed with moisture and a small smile on her face.
Was Gary making her cry? What was going on?
“Sadie! Oh, my goodness. Come in,” her aunt said.
JoJo didn’t sound upset. She sounded . . . happy.
Gary stood, letting go of JoJo’s hand and putting his in the pockets of his jeans. “Hi, Sadie.” He gave her a small smile.
“Hi, Gary.”
It could have been the lighting in the room, but she could swear it looked as if the rims of Gary’s eyes were red from crying.
“I’ll leave you two alone,” he said. With a wink and nod toward JoJo he moved around the bed and out the door.
Sadie watching him go, a list of questions forming in her head. Questions she would push to the back of her mind for now, her attention turning to her aunt.
“JoJo. I can’t believe this happened.” She moved around to where Gary had been sitting and took his place in the chair at her aunt’s bedside.
“Oh, it was just an accident.” It wasn’t new for JoJo to brush things off as not a big deal. Never wanting attention, she tended to act as if she could carry the weight of the world on her own. In Sadie’s mind, JoJo had done that very thing for most of her life.
JoJo was so vulnerable and had been so for months now. How could Sadie have let her guard down and focused on herself so much? Her heart ached at the thought of James’ support, the small touches in the hospital hallway that spoke volumes of how he was right there for her. How Sadie felt so safe in his arms, so adored every time he looked at her.
She wanted that. She wanted all of it. And yet, at what cost?
Right in front of her was proof of how vulnerable JoJo was and how much she still needed her. And where had Sadie been? On a date with James.
“I can almost see the smoke coming from your brain,” JoJo said, interrupting Sadie’s thoughts. “You keep thinking like that and you’ll hurt yourself.”
Sadie pulled a face.
“Don’t look at me like that,” JoJo admonished, a note of teasing in her voice.
“JoJo. You’re lying in a hospital bed.”
“You have a firm grasp of the obvious, Loves. And I am here because it was an accident. I got dehydrated and little lightheaded. I stood up from my sewing table and…well, the rest is right here,” she said as she pointed to her wrapped wrist.
“Why didn’t you call me?”
“I didn’t want to interrupt your date.”
Sadie shook her head.
“I called Gary and he came right over and brought me here. It’s all fine.”
It didn’t feel all fine. Sadie feared things might never feel fine ever again.
“You look so lovely,” JoJo smiled at her.
Sadie looked down at her dress. She’d all but forgotten she’d taken the time to do her hair special and dress up for the evening, the events that unfolded becoming all she could focus on. Sitting with James at the restaurant felt like a distant memory even thought it had been a mere hour or so ago.
The conversation with James was forefront in her thoughts, however. She’d decided to tell JoJo everything, but now? Now Sadie’s feelings had dropped right back to where she’d been, the sense of dread weighing her down. How she could solve their financial issues without turning JoJo’s world, or her own upside down?
JoJo reached out her hand. Sadie leaned forward resting her arms on the side of the bed, her hands holding JoJo’s.
“Talk to me, Loves.”
Sadie’s shoulders sagged. Tears threatened to fall and out of sheer exhaustion, she let them.
JoJo squeezed her hand and said nothing, just gave Sadie the gift of her presence as she cried, her forehead resting on the side of JoJo’s bed, her hands holding onto her aunt’s as if the only lifeline she had.
After a few minutes, JoJo said, “I think it’s time we talk, Sadie.”
Sadie looked up. JoJo only called her Sadie when she was serious.
“I know what you’ve been carrying alone and it’s time you let me in on it. On everything.”
Sadie sat up in her chair and gently took her hands from JoJo’s so she could grab a tissue from a nearby box and wipe her face. JoJo was a mother to Sadie and her voice held a tone she only used when speaking to her as such. “What do you mean?”
“I know about the rent being raised and I know that we’re stretched because of medical bills.”
Sadie’s shoulders sagged again. She couldn’t decide if she was relieved JoJo knew or irritated with herself that she hadn’t hidden it all as well as she would have liked.
As if reading her mind, JoJo said, “You hid it pretty well, I’ll give you that, but based on clues I sniffed out from knowing you so well, along with Moira having a gut feeling of what was going on, we pieced it together. Not to mention you aren’t quite as good at hiding paperwork as you think.”
Sadie frowned.
“Moira is our right hand at the store, Sadie. She has to go through the desk and paperwork from time to time.”
Sadie sat back in the chair, her hands now in her lap toying with the tissue.
“I don’t know what to do,” Sadie said, the tears once more sliding down her cheeks.
“Oh, Loves.” JoJo reached her hand out again, and Sadie leaned forward to hold it in her own.
“I don’t have a lot of regrets in this life, but I do regret teaching you that we are to do this life alone. That everything we carry would only be a burden to others if we reach out for help.”
Sadie sat up and leaned closer to her aunt. “That’s not true, Jo. You are the most generous, giving person I know.”
“Well, thank you for saying that, but that is giving. I’m terrible at receiving.”
Sadie let that soak in, James’ words at dinner coming to mind. That it’s not even about asking for help with physical things like fixing a broken garbage disposal or bathroom sink. The toughest burdens to share with others were emotional. That takes trust.
“I’m sorry I didn’t trust you with everything,” Sadie admitted. “I thought I was protecting you. I just didn’t want to anything else on your plate while you were in treatment and healing.”
“You were being thoughtful, and I appreciate that.”
“But from now on it will be you and me against the world again.” She meant the words but as she said them, the desire to be with James tugged at her heart, the sense that she had to choose one over the other causing her emotions to wrestle inside of her.
“That’s another thing I regret,” JoJo said with a frown. “I regret I may have taught you to not give love a chance. That it wouldn’t be worth it or, God forbid, that it would mean one of us was abandoning the other.”
Sadie’s stomach turned.
“I want to tell you something.” JoJo eyes met Sadie’s. “You asked me not too long ago if I had jumped into anything when I was younger and I told you that I had thought about it but didn’t. That I was fine with my feet planted firmly where they were.”
Sadie nodded, recalling the conversation.
JoJo took a deep breath in and let it out. “I was in love years ago.”
Whatever Sadie expected JoJo to say, that wasn’t it.
“You were about ten years old. It wasn’t long after my parents died and your mother left. I was young and had a lot on my plate at once.” She squeezed Sadie’s hand. “Don’t get me wrong. I was happy, just overwhelmed. Theo and I started dating and he was wonderful. Kind. Caring. He was everything I thought I wanted.”
Sadie tried to flip through the files of her brain to recall anything about Sadie dating. She couldn’t remember any men in JoJo’s life other than Gary, to be honest. Certainly no one who took JoJo out on dates or came over to the house.
“He knew all about you and our situation, but I kept him at length, not wanting you to get too attached or close to him in case we broke up. Which is what we did.”
“Was it a relationship with him the thing you didn’t jump at back then, Jo?”
She nodded. “We cared a great deal for each other, but he wanted to move around, see the world. Nearlake wasn’t for him.” She shrugged. “It wasn’t even Nearlake, really. He liked it here. But he wanted to travel a ton, possibly live different places for months at a time. And I didn’t want that.”
Sadie’s heart sank in her chest. She had always felt a sense of guilt over all that JoJo had given up to raise her. Until now, she didn’t know just how much that was. “I’m so sorry, Jo.” She shook her head. “Raising me cost you so much.”
“Now you just wait a minute. That is nonsense. And that is not why I am telling you this.” She squeezed Sadie’s hand tighter. “I am telling you I made my choice, and I don’t regret that for a second. I love this place. It’s my home. I love the store. It’s my life’s work and the legacy my parents left for us. And you, Sadie, are the greatest gift God could have ever given me. Raising you was the greatest joy of my life. The relationship we have now is just the cherry on the sundae. And the truth is, Theo was a wonderful man. But we weren’t right for each other. We wanted so many different things. It was a tough decision, but it was the right one.”
The sound of Gary’s voice echoed into the room from the hallway. He was outside the door talking with one of the nurses.
JoJo smiled and looked from the door to Sadie. “I’m telling you all of this, Loves, because what I regret is teaching you that love isn’t worth the risk. I blocked love after that. And I don’t want to do that anymore. I waited way too long and the last thing I want for you is to do the same. Don’t make the same mistake as me, Sadie. If you have found love, grab hold with both hands and don’t let go.”