Chapter 15
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
CASS
Date 16
Tonight’s the finance bro yeah?
He tried to pick a fight with the bartender to show me how alpha he is
did he beat him up with his giant dick?
Like a baby’s arm
you didn’t, did you?
You aren’t slut shaming me are you?
you can do whatever you want
But did you?
Josh has unsent a message
I didn’t sleep with him
Josh has unsent a mes sage
Date 17
So this guy tells me we’re going to that gallery opening I was telling you about, then when we meet he drags me out to this outdoor rink
That’s a risky play
It was -20 C
I don’t skate
He didn’t even ask
Then he got grumpy when I wouldn’t go on the ice
like it was my fault he didn’t check with me beforehand
You okay? Need me to come get you?
No, I’m home, thanks
I thought this batch of guys was supposed to be decent
You call me if you need me
Date 18
Want to know one of the many reasons I’m glad I don’t work in an office?
Hit me
Office parties
My date tricked me into going to his
Sneaky little shit
Then he ignored me for an hour while he chatted up a coworke r
I think he just brought me to be arm candy to make her jealous
You do make beautiful arm candy
Not now, please
Date 19
Tonight’s the firefighter, right?
Burny McHotpants?
He a douche too?
He’s a peach! Chat tmr xoxo
what
Cass juggled her phone and mocha in one hand and pinned the swatches under the arm that her purse didn’t occupy with the other. The lineup at Rosso that morning had stretched out the door, and there were more than a few people on the roads who could use winter driving lessons. According to her call sheet, she was only five minutes late, but between Terry, Stephen, and Josh, at least one of them would be pissed.
Maybe Dawson would be a doll and run interference again.
The parking lot looked like a group of drunks decided to play bumper cars in a skating rink. Cass made a wild guess as to where the lot’s parking lines were and angled her pick up close to her usual spot. Filming wasn’t rolling for another three hours, but the set bustled with action. Terry gave a quick wave as they rushed by, and unsurprisingly, Brynne was nowhere to be seen, but Stephen smiled as he jogged past with a crisp, “Morning!”
So far, so good.
The makeup artist applied a final dust of powder over Dawson’s p erfect cheekbones and holstered her brush as she stepped back. “All done, D.”
“Thanks, Amy,” he said with a polite grin to the artist, who swooned in reply. Dawson let Cass brush some loose powder from his lapel, his eyes fixed somewhere between her chin and her nose, and she wondered if she’d forgotten to put on lipstick.
“Might want to lay low for a bit,” he said, smiling. “Josh is on the warpath.”
And that answered that question.
But it was possible, likely even, that he was stressed about the shots for today. Libby had worked some electrical mastery that fortunately didn’t blow any fuses. At least literally. So much light blasted the set that the resulting heat forced them to turn the building’s furnace off for the day. Libby and Josh had argued for hours over how to get the look; Josh wanting to correct in post and Libby insisting she could get it bright enough with practical effects.
Josh would be antsy until they had a few takes. In the meantime, he’d be growly. Which meant any number of poor PAs might be chewed up over a misplaced pen. And if he was cranky she was late, well, better to get that over with before his bluster turned into a hurricane.
“When isn’t he on the warpath?” Cass said conspiratorially. She lifted onto her toes, hand braced on Dawson’s thick forearm for balance, to scan the crowded set.
As usual, she didn’t need to search long. That, and Josh’s bellow thundered across the room, his eyes already locked on her.
“I’ll go check on him. Make sure he’s not terrorizing the caterer or anything.”
“Are you sure you want to do that?” the makeup artist asked. “He’s extra murdery today.”
Cass clicked her tongue. “He’s not so bad.”
“With you, maybe.”
None of the other directors she’d worked with had cared if she was a co uple minutes late, as long as it didn’t scrunch shooting. Every director had, however, been a control freak on some level. Timeliness was obviously one of Josh’s triggers.
Next time, set your alarm clock earlier , she thought, crossing the set. Josh tore his eyes away from her, scowling at an innocent tablet in his hand.
Even from her height disadvantage, she could see the screen was black, and she rolled her lips inwards to ward off the smile that would just provoke him further.
Actually, that might be fun.
She bumped his thigh with her hip as she caught up to him, turning her sweetest smile on full blast.
“Good morning, sunshine,” she said in her most sugary voice. “I checked the weather forecast this morning. I didn’t think the snow would turn to rain so quickly.”
“What?” he asked, studiously avoiding her face.
“Maybe all the clouds are just in here, raining all over you.”
A short gruff left his throat, and while he didn’t smile, the line between his eyebrows faded a touch. She scooted into his eyeline again. “I’m so sorry I didn’t get in earlier.”
“Late night?” he bit out.
Oh, he was in a right state. He couldn’t be that mad at her for being five minutes late. And how did that man look so good with such a foul expression on his face? Cass tilted her head. “Later than I planned, honestly. It was fun.”
A muscle in his cheek jumped, and the line between his brows deepened again.
Cass continued, determined to be undeterred by his moodiness. “Definitely a player, but he was so sweet, in his own way. He’s not looking for anything serious, but I swear he is my friend’s type through and through, so I texted her to join us. I stuck around for a bit, but I got a text from her this morning, and they shut the coffee shop down. They’re meeting up again tomorrow.”
Cass could almost see the sparks fly when her friend had arrived. Uno rthodox, maybe, but since she wasn’t looking at scoring with Burny McHotpants, who was ridiculously good looking with his bright blue eyes and calendar-ready physique, why not try to hook him up with a friend? Cass had snuck away after a bit to let the two of them get to know each other. She wasn’t entirely convinced they’d noticed her leave.
It wasn’t clear from the barrage of texts her friend had sent that morning, extolling his virtues, physical and otherwise, if they’d gotten naked last night. If they hadn’t, Cass was willing to set a very short countdown clock to the event. And if history was any predictor, Cass could set a timer on the save-the-date invitations.
Not interested in anything serious, my perfectly round tush. My track record is flawless.
Josh narrowed his eyes at her. “So, your good time wasn’t because you were playing with his hose?”
“Ew!” Cass hid a snort behind her hand. “No! We both liked the same music and watching them was adorable. Seriously, you should have seen them. They were picking out china patterns by the second cup.”
“Oh.” Josh twisted his mouth, shoulders releasing down his back. “Good. I mean, for your friend. That’s too bad. For you.”
“At least one of us is on their way to Mr. Right and not just Mr. Right Now.”
“Is that what you want?”
Cass studied her fingernails. “I want someone who respects me. Who is honest with me.”
“Jesus, Charms. The bar really is in hell.”
The air huffed from her lungs. That was the understatement of the century. Every crappy ex-boyfriend had lowered the bar a little further. Years of unmet needs eroded her standards until the bare minimum felt like a grand gesture.
What did she want, really?
It wasn’t a ring, or a minivan, or a house in the burbs. Josh wasn’t let ting her touch anyone, so it wasn’t like she was getting laid. Heck, it was more than just getting over what’s-his-nuts.
Actually, Nick hadn’t crossed her mind in weeks. That was progress. But it wasn’t what she wanted .
It was how Stephen had spent days tracking down a rare vinyl Libby wanted. Or how Alex had painted their bedroom Jill’s favourite colour because he thought it would make her happy. How all the men Cass had dated took what she said she wanted from them and gave it to someone else.
“Just once, I want someone to make an effort.” She blinked hard and turned a brittle smile to him. “Do you think I’m asking too much?”
An emotion she couldn’t identify hid behind the shadow that crossed his face. “I don’t think you’re asking for enough.”
Filming was running late. As usual. Josh had demanded extra takes. Also as usual. Craft services had cleared the last of dinner hours ago, and so now not only did her feet hurt, her stomach could be heard rumbling across the set.
Cass braced her hands on the railing to relieve the pressure on her back. Even with the late night, Brynne and Dawson looked as fresh as they had at the start of the day. Like her thinking of him drew his attention, Dawson caught her eye from across the room, and she smiled back.
She had to give it to him; the man was a pro. He’d been on his feet twice as long as her and hadn’t complained once.
She added a few side twists, flexing her bad knee to keep up the range of motion. Surely, they had to be done soon, and she could go home and turn on show tunes and do some sewing.
Cass hadn’t checked the time since dinner, and she pulled out her phone to check, her stomach bottoming out at the message notification on her screen.
hey cass
Been a few months since I’ve seen that beautiful face of yours. Wyd tonight?
Cass shoved her phone into her pocket so hard she thought the seams would rip and skittered across the set as fast as her sore feet would take her.
“I need you to take my phone.”
Libby finished repositioning a light and turned to her friend. “Huh?” she asked eloquently.
“I just got a text from Nick.”
“What?” Libby screeched. “Why haven’t you blocked him yet?”
“I don’t know! Reasons!” Cass said, waving her hands in wild circles. “What if he ran into trouble and I was the only person he could call?”
“That is a Nick problem, not a Cass problem.”
“Libs, this isn’t helpful.”
“You want helpful? Nick can get fucked.” Libby gave her a flat look. “But not by you.”
“Can you just take it?”
“And do what, exactly?” Libby demanded. “Hold it above your head so you can’t reach it?”
Cass groaned. It was explosive every time they got together. Even if they didn’t talk much, their physical chemistry was off the charts. Hot and sweaty and just as devastating as the stick of dynamite that would blow up her emotions the next morning. She could practically feel his heavy gaze on her and her thighs rubbed together in anticipation.
Only one other person had ever gotten her blood moving like that.
If she and Nick were dynamite, then she and Josh were atomic.
Or had been.
Now Josh was too busy focussing on getting Brynne in frame to notice Ca ss. Why would he notice her, anyway? He’d said he wanted to keep it strictly professional, and he’d all but outright rejected her more than once. Backing away at their photo shoot. In the farmer’s field, with the dawn rising around them. When he’d checked on her after her date, leaving the second she suggested he stay.
Did she need another rejection to hammer the message home?
Apparently, she did, if she was rereading Nick’s text.
Cass buried her face in her hands. “What am I doing? I’m so stupid.”
“You are not stupid. You have a brain that is as big as your heart, but your heart and libido form an unholy alliance that overrides your brain every time.”
“The orgasms aren’t worth it.” She peeked from between her fingers. “Are they?”
“Now you sound stupid. Just say no.”
Cass wrung her hands together, partially to prevent her from reaching into her pocket and texting Nick back. “It’s not that simple!”
“No, it’s literally that simple.” Libby gave Cass a pitying look. “I’m not putting your phone in time-out, and clearly you don’t seem able to just ignore him. What about setting up a date tonight? Give yourself plausible deniability that you can’t meet him?”
Cass blew out a breath. “Perfect. Yes. That’ll work.”
She opened Tinder. Josh hadn’t swiped right on as many people last time, and only three new people matched her. She’d swapped a first message with each of them a couple days ago, just a quick hi with varying inane openers in reply, but she hadn’t opened the app since.
A reply sat in her inbox from each of them, and she quickly sent each of them a message.
Hey! Short notice but want to grab cocktails tonight at 9?
Saved. The cute architect was responding already. Cass hovered by Libby until his response popped up.
I’ve got nothing better to do. Send me the name and I’ll meet you there
Relief blanketed her, and she hammered out the name of the lounge with a see you tonight!
“Crisis averted,” Cass said. “Going for overpriced drinks with Leo the architect. No Nick. Nick-free zone.”
At least tonight was covered. Cass pecked out a decline to Nick, wincing as she typed another time instead of the eat a bag of dicks she should have replied with.
She should have just said she was in Cuba until next summer and hoped he’d forget about her. While he ate a bag of dicks.
“I hate seeing you like this,” Libby said, shaking her head. “You’re a grown-ass woman. You are confusing the excitement and attention he gives you with something real, and you’re letting yourself get hurt over and over.”
“Can you just celebrate with me that I didn’t cave to Nick, for the first time ever, and I’m going to go out with Leo tonight and have a perfectly boring time?”
Libby swooped down for a hug. “Oh, you’re right. I’m proud of you.”
“Who knows?” Cass said. “Maybe he’ll be a proper player and I’ll be able to practice my resistance skills.”
Date 20
finally hapened
What? You don’t sound murdered
He ditchd me
Im just sitting here chuggnig wine like I meant to be heer by myslef
Funny thing is I woudl be having great time if id planned that way
just fleel pahtetic
I can think of a thousand words to describe you, and pathetic would never come up
Tour sweat
tour sweat
your sweet
Are you drunk?
alerb
Where are you?
I wnat to aloen
I’m coming to get you