Sixteen #2
“Did you sleep with the blonde?” I asked, holding my breath.
His voice was low and husky, filled with gravel. “No, Jory. I don’t sleep with anyone but you.”
“Then why say those things you said? Why say you wanted to get married and—”
“’Cause I do wanna get married, but you were being so fuckin’ smug,” he barked at me, letting me go suddenly, pushing me back into my seat.
“After we left my folks’ place that day, you started talking like of course I’m gonna do this or that, talkin’ like you fuckin’ own me, like I belong to you…
and for you it’s so easy, you just fall in love and—”
“Who says I’m in love?” I argued.
His scowl was back. “Oh fuck you. I know you’ve got it bad, so don’t even try and sit there and pretend you don’t.
How fast you ran, what you did, calling Dom instead of me.
All that shit is about you creating drama because your feelings got hurt.
Well, fuck you, J. You don’t just run off if I do some stupid shit.
You call me on it and tell me I’m an idiot and tell me where to go.
That’s what you do. All that shit I said that Sunday—you think I meant any of that? ”
I just stared at him.
His laugh was more a bark. “Fuck, you did. That’s funny. I would’ve thought you knew me better.”
“Why say it if you didn’t mean it?” I repeated my earlier question.
“Because I was mad!” he roared at me, his hand on the back of my head to pull me close, staring into my eyes. “You can be gay and have your life and be whatever, but me, if I have you, there’s stuff I gotta let go.”
“Then maybe you shouldn’t let it go,” I said honestly, staring deep into his beautiful eyes. “I mean, you resenting me down the road does not sound like a good time.”
He cupped my face in his hands, drawing me close to kiss me breathless. He kissed me so long, so hard, I could hear my heart pounding in my ears from lack of oxygen.
I tore my mouth free, and his hands went to my ass as he drew me across the seat, over the emergency brake, and into his lap, his mouth on my throat, biting, licking, sucking, and kissing whatever skin he could reach.
I trembled hard under his hands. He felt so good, and I had never thought in a million years he would be the one holding me again.
“I have no choice anymore,” he confessed, running his nose up the side of my neck as his lips trailed over my skin. “Need you. Can’t sleep without you, and it’s only you. There’s no woman I want…no other guy…just you. I am completely addicted to you.”
He was? “You are?”
“Yeah.” He sounded so miserable. “Shit.”
I smiled at him. “You don’t sound very happy about it.”
“Because it would be a helluva lot easier if I didn’t feel like this.”
I looked into his eyes.
“But see, I’m crazy about you makin’ tea whenever there’s a problem and your smell on my sheets and having you next to me in the middle of the night… I mean, I got used to all that so fuckin’ fast.”
He was a mess, and I loved it.
“You put me through it when you left, and I’ve been so…
pissed…at you. And then that night I saw you out and you looked like you’re okay, you’re fine without me, and…
and I just wanted to take you home and… Then the other night.
What if you were hurt or killed or… What the fuck am I supposed to do?
And that asshole tonight, he thinks he’s got a shot with you.
Everybody thinks they’ve got a shot because I’m not around and…
it’s not gonna fuckin’ happen! I will not allow it to happen.
I want you with me all the time. Can’t have anyone else touching you or…
You belong to me. You get that, right? You’re mine.
I think I’m gonna mark you—put my name on you so everybody knows you’re—”
It was too much, so I cut him off, shifting in his lap so my ass was pressing against his groin, wrapping my arms around his neck and kissing him with every drop of love and hate and everything in between that I had.
I was ravenous for him, and the way I kissed him brought moans and whimpers up out of him.
It made me smile—big strong man just shaking with need for his lover.
It was staggering to be that wanted, to drown in the heat of the kiss, of the embrace.
“Swear on my life, Sam, swear you’re gonna tell everyone about me.”
“Shit,” he groaned, and I could tell he was in agony. “I fuckin’ hate you.”
“Swear.”
“I swear,” he almost yelled. “But you hafta take my word that I will. You need to trust me.” He was exasperated, sick of fighting with me. It took so much energy.
“I do.”
“I really fuckin’ hate you,” he growled at me, his hands sliding up and down my thighs as I shifted in his lap, shoving my groin against his abdomen.
“I know.” I smiled into his smoky-blue eyes, reaching down between us, my hand slipping over the front of his jeans, rubbing gently but firmly.
“Jesus God,” he blurted out, his head falling back against the seat. “Jory, I swear, baby, I did not get in bed with anybody else. Please-please-please let me get in bed with—”
“Yes, Sam. Let’s go to my place.”
He lifted me up and dumped me back in my seat, and I laughed at how fast he drove, the tires squealing, the engine revving loud. I told him to put the light on the top of the car, and he shot me a scathing look that just made me laugh that much harder.
At my door he hovered over me, his lips on the side of my neck, and I had trouble with the lock.
He took the keys and got the door open, then locked it behind us.
Lifted into his arms, I wrapped my legs around his waist as he carried me to my bedroom.
Clothes were torn off and left where they fell, both of us getting into bed at the same time.
I scrambled back against the headboard, and he came down on top of me, his mouth on me, swallowing me down.
I arched up against him and heard him fumbling in my nightstand.
When slick fingers slid inside me, I yelled his name.
“I might hurt you,” he confessed, lifting his lips from me.
“Try,” I breathed out.
The noise he made in the back of his throat before he lifted my hips and buried himself in me, deep and hard, was raw and throaty. And the thrust would have hurt, but his hand was back to stroke my shaft and keep my arousal at fever pitch. To be filled and held at the same time was heaven.
“I missed you.”
I had missed him more. My eyes were all over him, watching the cording muscles as he moved above me, and then the way he caught his breath as I pushed against him, rolling him over on his back.
He gripped my thighs as I rose above him.
Reaching up to pull me down, close, he was so gentle as he caressed my skin.
“Promise me you won’t go anywhere,” he rasped, my face in his hands as he stared into my eyes, the throb of pleasure sliding through him as I seated myself deeper.
“I promise.” I smiled slowly.
“Don’t leave me. I’ll hurt you if you try and leave me.”
I held his gaze. “Yeah? You’ll hurt me?”
“Jory.” His voice cracked. “Please, baby, I—”
But my mouth on his cut him off as I kissed the worry right out of him. When I pulled back, his eyes were clouded, his lips swollen. He looked utterly ravaged.
“You know, that woman was right.”
I squinted at him. “What are we talking about?”
“That woman that time, the one who came with my neighbor… You could be a model if you wanted. You are so beautiful.”
I laughed at him, trying to kiss him.
“You are. Your mouth and your skin and your sweet ass.”
“I don’t think she was talking about my ass,” I whispered, loving our mindless pillow talk.
He ignored me. “I love how your eyes get when we’re doing this. Jesus, J, it’s so fuckin’ hot.”
I flicked my tongue over his lips before sucking his bottom one inside my mouth. I felt his body shudder beneath mine, and I shifted, lowering myself over him, taking all of him inside me.
“God, you feel so good.” His voice was raw, husky, his pupils blown as he stared up at me. “This shit is gonna kill me.”
And I smiled as I made love to the man I loved. I was an idiot and a drama queen; he was right. He was as crazy about me as I was about him, and how I had missed that I had no idea.
“Please come back to my place, J.”
“No.” I grinned lazily, clenching my muscles so he gasped. “I like it here.”
His voice was filled with gravel when he could finally speak. “Then can I stay here with you?”
“I’ll think about it.”
He had me flat on my back a second later, my legs still around his waist. “I wanna sleep here with you, all right? Can I do that, please?”
“Yes,” I said quickly as he shoved down into me. “Stay.”
“I’m the only one you ever let sleep with you, huh, J?”
“Yes.”
“’Cause you trust me.”
“Yes.”
“Remember that, all right?”
“Yes, dear.”
The way he was looking at me made my heart hurt. My tears came from joy, and when he wiped them away and kissed my eyes, I told him he could stay forever if he wanted.
“I want to,” he said, his face buried in my shoulder.
I couldn’t hold him tight enough.