Twenty-Four #4
His sigh was long and loud. “Whenever there was a thing like a Christmas party, or a Fourth of July party, or the policemen’s ball, or whatever, she always asked me why I didn’t bring anybody. I always told her that I wanted you to come with me but you couldn’t make it.”
“Oh.”
“But it was always the next time and the next time, because the timing was never right, and like last year at her birthday, you weren’t with me yet. I mean, you were gonna be, eventually, but still… I think she got the idea in her head that I was stalling.”
“Which you were.”
“Which I was.”
“I see.” I chuckled as he steered me down a long row of cars.
“So tonight when she saw you and got to dance with you and talk to you, I think she was just so happy that you were real and not a figment of my imagination.”
I nodded.
“What’s the matter?”
“I just… Although I love not being a secret, I also don’t want your career to be screwed because of me. I don’t want people to think about you as the bisexual detective. I just want them to know you as a good detective, as just Sam Kage.”
“Like I said before, if they do, they do, J. If they have a problem with me, there’s nothing I can or would change about that. I get to take you home with me tonight and every night, and that’s all that really matters.”
“Okay.”
“And Christ, did you bond with Ersi and Steph or what?”
“I did, huh?”
“Oh shit yeah.”
“I’m really happy about that.”
“The three of you looked amazing out there together.”
I smiled at him as we walked down a ramp to the next level.
“But I gotta tell you—the girls were hot, you were hotter.”
“I think you’re a little biased. Pat and Chaz would both say different.”
“No, J, make no mistake…you were really something. I’ll explain it to you when we get home.”
From the low sound of his voice, I understood that his explanation would have nothing to do with words.
I finally saw the boat he drove, and as we walked toward it, Sam threw his arm around my shoulders, and it occurred to me as I walked beside the man I loved, that without him, I had no home.
“I’m very lucky,” I said, because I meant it.
“Me too,” he said back as we closed in on the car.
But I had to explain it to him so he understood.
Explain that he was so brave to risk everything for love, because loving me had changed how he saw himself, had changed his relationship with his family and friends, had called everything he knew into question.
He loved me more than himself, and that was so rare to find.
I was still raw from earlier and realized that I was barely holding it together.
I started to tear up, and Sam stopped suddenly and pulled me into his arms. He hugged me tight, molding me to him.
I told him, as I did often, that I loved him, and he said he knew, had always known, even when I’d told him I didn’t.
After a moment we walked on, his arm back around my shoulders, leading me like he always did.
In the car, when Sam’s phone rang, I told him to let it go to voicemail.
I had a bad feeling about who would be calling him.
And he would have ignored it, but when he checked the number, he saw that it was Dane.
I sighed as I watched him listen, saw his brows furrow, his jaw muscles clench, and his knuckles turn white on the steering wheel.
I was in trouble. When he stopped the car in front of his building, I didn’t wait; I got out fast, darting toward the stoop in front of his—now our—apartment.
“Jory, goddamnit!”
I ran faster, flying inside the front door and hitting the stairs fast. I heard him below me as I shoved the key into the dead bolt lock on the front door.
Inside, I dropped my stuff on the couch and flew down the dark hall to the bedroom.
I stripped out of my clothes and ran to the bathroom.
I clicked the door closed as I heard the front door slam shut.
“Jory!”
“I gotta take a shower. I’m all sweaty,” I called back as I turned the water on and got in, the hot spray hitting my face.
I heard the growl of frustration through the door, but he didn’t come in. Apparently, I was safe for the time being. But I had to come out sometime.
Once I was washed and dried and had put on lotion and all the different products that went on my face, when I finally opened the door, he nearly fell in on me.
“Hey.” I smiled up at him.
“You being all clean is not gonna distract me,” he said, cupping my chin in his hand, raising my eyes to his. “Your brother said you went to see Caleb, and his mother was there too…is that true?”
“Have you ever known Dane to lie?”
“I was just giving you an opportunity to come clean. I don’t doubt Dane for a second.”
Shit, I thought. “Shit,” I said.
His fingers tightened on my chin, his eyes boring into mine. “Please… Never again without me.”
I nodded.
“I’ll make you something to eat while you tell me everything that happened from the moment you got there. Don’t leave anything out.”
After I dressed and joined him in the kitchen, I got to watch the various emotions slide over Sam’s features as I talked. When I ended with the way Caleb had looked at me before I left, he nodded as his eyes locked on mine.
“Did that scare you?”
“I just… I never thought that he could hurt me, but he could.”
“He’s sick, Jory.”
Nice that he was trying to comfort me. “Sam, when you contacted the families of the guys Caleb killed…what did they say?”
“Closure’s good, ya know?”
“Do they blame me or Dane?”
“People can’t be blamed for the craziness of others, J. Why would they begrudge you your life? That’s stupid.”
I just stared into his eyes. What was I supposed to say? “Hey, why do you think Caleb went to Dane’s apartment that night when he left the hospital? Why did he grab Candace?”
“I have no idea.”
“Just c’mon…venture a guess.”
“Maybe he panicked. I mean, he was already planning on setting up his mother, but he thought we’d figured it out.”
“You did figure it out. I was the idiot that saw more there than there was. You knew he was guilty. I was the only one who thought he was innocent.”
“You thought the best of him because he was your friend. Just let it go.”
I had no choice.
“It’s too bad that Susan’s last choice was a bad one.”
“What are you talking about?”