16. Chapter 16
Chapter 16
D ecember 21st seems to be even more magical in 1849 than it is in my own time. It’s from the edge of Graf Hill on the side of my room that I watch the staff finish decorating the gardens for the outdoor part of the Winter Solstice Ball tonight.
I take in the crisp winter air. My current situation is far from good, but at least now I can say it’s stable. My work at the Library makes sense. I’ve met a lot of people and not even Sylmarilla is as nasty to me as she used to be. I still have the dreams and enjoy nightmare-free nights.
And, strangely, I no longer feel like I’m under observation in the house. In fact, Orpheus seems to truly not mind that I keep coming to him with questions about his research on the nature of time.
But it’s nothing to celebrate really. I’m still stuck in the wrong time, I still have no idea how to go back, and Lorcan and Raven are still suffering the consequences of my actions.
If I let it, it would all be disorienting, overwhelming, sad and enraging.
I let out a sigh and tell myself to get it together, if not for myself, for the people around me. It’s the Winter Solstice and at least Lorcan and Raven deserve to have me brighten up their day a little.
Damn it, the lunch plans.
I throw a look over my shoulder to check the time on the clock on the wall in my room. I let out a groan. If I don’t get going now, I’ll be late.
I get back inside, throw a shawl on and step out of my room, looking for the shoes I’ve left in the corridor.
I’m already reaching for them when the smell wafts over to me and I spot Nymeria sitting in front of the commode, watching my movements with a suspicious amount of focus.
I freeze in place with the slipper in my hand. My eyes narrow at the little pest.
She pissed in my fucking shoes. My most comfortable goddamn pair.
Pressing my lips tight, I drop the shoe. Then, so as to show I don’t care, without taking my eyes off her, I grab another pair and slowly put it on, enjoying when I see her eyes narrow with displeasure.
Smiling, I stand straight, turn on my heel and walk out the front door, starting my usual trek down the steps.
It’s before I reach Lorcan’s cabin that I see the smoke rising from the chimney and spot the servants making their way out.
“Your Grace,” they greet me with slight bows of their heads as we pass each other by.
My smile growing wider, I let myself in, finding Lorcan standing in the middle of the dining room, staring at the spread on the table with confusion on his face as Raven hides in one of the open cabinets.
“Well, what do you think?” I ask as I walk over to them.
Lorcan turns to me with a frown. Then he smooths his features out, but there’s mockery in his voice when he replies, “Your servants have certainly outdone themselves, Your Grace.”
I chuckle. “Thank you, I gave the orders myself,” I say as I start getting settled at the table, raising my eyebrows at the two of them to get them moving as well.
We feast on the three-course meal with fire crackling in the hearth behind Lorcan’s back, the conversation mostly revolving around Lorcan’s struggles with his stable boys and girls.
“Didn’t you say the new one showed promise?” I ask as I lift my glass to my lips.
He shakes his head, throwing the present I placed on the edge of the table another glance that I think he believes is sneaky. “He’s green.”
I raise my eyebrows at him, suppressing a smile. “Oh, you mean, like a student?” I click my tongue. “Yes, it’s a real shame you have zero experience with that.”
He squints at the mockery in my voice, but then his eyes dart to the present again.
I roll my eyes. “Won’t you stop glancing at your present and open it already?”
“I didn’t get you anything,” he says apologetically.
With a smile, I grab it off the table and throw it at him.
He opens it and frowns at the cufflinks.
“Aren’t they nice?” I ask.
“They seem a touch too expensive for something that should be purely functional.” He puts them back in the box, but then remembers to add, “But thank you.”
That’s fine, I tell myself.
“I have something for you as well, Raven, for when we’re back in our time again.” I take a small, loosely wrapped present out of my corset and place it on the table in front of her.
At least she seems to enjoy picking it apart.
“For your beautiful long hair,” I say when she takes the jade comb out of the wrapping.
She blinks at it for a moment, then says “Thank you,” but just leaves it there as she goes in search of food.
That’s fine, I tell myself.
It’s at that moment that someone knocks at the door. “Your Grace—”
“Yes yes, I know. I’m coming.”
And I start getting up, noticing the disappointment on Lorcan’s face. I frown, because he did say he didn’t want to go to the Ball. “I could wait for you to change.”
He shakes his head. “Just go.”
I give him a nod and leave the cottage with Raven at my tail. But as soon as we’re out, she moves to fly in the opposite direction.
“Come with me, Raven,” I plead, “at least until we head for the Ball.”
She stops, but she doesn’t start flying down.
To hell with it. I won’t just be waiting for her to open up anymore. I’m taking things into my own hands.
I spot the servant waiting for me and wave. “I won’t be long, Joseph, I promise.”
He disappears.
“Raven,” I call out, waving her over to the table under the pine tree. I sit down and she lands on top of it. “Isn’t there anything you’d like to talk to me about?” I ask gently. “Anything at all?”
“No,” she says.
I think for a second. “Alright, then can I tell you something?”
She blinks at me.
“When I was sixteen,” I start, hoping to ease her into it with a confession of my own, “I had this friend, the only friend I had at the time. She and I, I thought we’d stay thick as thieves forever. I thought I could trust her with my life. So I did.”
She gives me another blink.
“My father wasn’t a good man, Raven. I’d been daydreaming about running away for years before it happened, but it wasn’t until I turned sixteen that I mustered up the courage.” I let out a laugh. “I don’t know if I would have done it if I knew it would take me two more attempts. The first time I tried, I made a copy of the gate key, I packed my bags, and I waited for everyone to fall asleep to sneak out, only to be met at the gate by father himself. And my best friend, the only person I’d told about my plan. She didn’t look happy with herself, that’s for sure and certain, but she did it anyway. Later, I found out she’d been moved to the house for the specific purpose of getting close to me, so my father could have even more control over me.”
When she doesn’t say anything, I take a deep breath and get to the point. “So I know exactly what it feels like, being unable to find it in yourself to trust anyone. But you can trust me , Raven. You can trust me with anything.”
“I’m sorry you had to go through all that, Anna.”
I wave a hand in dismissal. “That’s all water under the bridge, sweetie, the point of this was just to tell you I’m here for you.”
“I know you are.”
I raise my eyebrows in anticipation.
“I just don’t have anything to talk about,” she says simply, and flies away.
The guilt hits like a knife to my gut.
For one long moment, I keep sitting there, feeling it twist inside me, slowly and painfully. If only I’d opened up to her like this three years ago, when it would’ve made a difference, instead of acting like a child and pushing her away.
Maybe we wouldn’t even be here right now.
I get up and force myself to shake it off.
The best thing I can do for both her, Lorcan and everyone else is not to let myself linger on the fact that it was all the mistakes that I have made that’s keeping them in this situation.
It’s to hold it together and not allow myself to stop looking for solutions.
*
Farryn. It’s Farryn I suffer through the dressing ordeal for. And her and I have long been done, cinched, curled and bejeweled. I even let Farryn put a few roses in my hair. But Sylmarilla is still trying things on in front of the huge cheval mirror in her room.
“It’s almost time, Syl,” Farryn cautiously warns.
“This does look nice,” her sister replies, sounding as if she didn’t even hear her, “however, I don’t think it’s fit for a Champion.” She turns to beam at us, including me . “Wouldn’t you agree?”
Her win at the First Round of the trials is certainly keeping her flying high.
“You deserve only the best tonight, sister,” Farryn says with a smile.
I turn to look at her. “You seem to be in high spirits, Farryn.”
A spark appears in her eyes. “I got a book today, one I’ve been desperate to read.”
“She’s lying,” her sister drawls, “she’s just happy she’ll be seeing that clumsy little sweetheart of hers.”
Farryn blushes and I decide to come to her aid. “Can’t one be happy about two things at the same time, Sylmarilla?”
She turns to look at me. “I suppose so, Anyi,” she says simply, the lack of condescension or mockery in her voice taking me by surprise. She turns back to the mirror.
Shaking off my disbelief, I turn to Farryn again, motioning at the older sister with a roll of my eyes. “I believe we still have some time on our hands. Why don’t you show me the book, Farryn?”
Suddenly even more animated, she gets up, grabs me by the hand and drags me to her room, where she sits me on her bed and produces the leather bound volume.
“To Farryn from Orpheus,” the inscription says.
I look up at her. “This was a gift from your brother ?”
“Yes,” she replies as she comes to sit next to me, “all my best books are a gift from him, although I always have to beg for an inscription and he always makes them so utterly unimaginative, I tell myself I won’t even bother next time. But then I do. What do you think?”
“It seems fascinating.” But my mind is on Orpheus now. “Tell me, Farryn… Has your brother always been such a grump?”
She chuckles. “Grump.” Then she turns serious and a little awkward. “He is , I suppose.” Then there’s a spark in her eyes again, followed by her taking my hand in hers. “But things will change for the better now that you’re here.”
Fuck. “You know, Farryn,” I start cautiously, “it’s good to believe in love, but it doesn’t automatically solve people’s issues. It still takes time and hard work.”
“Well, brother is already changing.”
I quirk an eyebrow. “Changing, really?”
“Yes, he used to almost never join us at dinner. Even when he would, he’d have some nasty wound from one of his machines. And if you think he’s a grump now … You’re such a positive influence on him.”
I hesitate for a second. I can’t exactly tell her we’re not real husband and wife, but I can’t let her go around thinking her brother can only be saved by a woman he has nothing to do with. “All I’m trying to say, Farryn, is that none of that has to have anything to do with me . Maybe your brother has simply found peace in general, so even if he loses me—”
Her hand flies to her mouth, making me immediately shut up. “Holy Word, Anyi. It would ruin him, I’ve seen the way he looks at you.”
Like a suspect?
“Oh, that is what it reminds me of…” She gets up and goes to rummage through one of her drawers, producing a pencil portrait of a woman with vague facial features, but a proud, mysterious demeanor. “When I was little,” she says, “brother was going through a sketching phase. I fell in love with this one so much, I pestered him into giving it to me.”
I look up at her with a smile. “Why do you like it so much?”
She presses her lips tight.
I laugh. “Go on, I won’t bite.”
She glances around as if to make sure there’s no one there to overhear. She drops her voice. “I simply love books and works of art where there is… yearning to be felt. This , every line has so much of it, it’s simply irresistible, don’t you think?”
I look at it again. “Well, it certainly has a mood.” I chuckle. “I should start calling your brother… Hm, what should I call him?”
“Oh I don’t think you want to do that ,” she drawls. “Or if you do, do it at your own peril.”
“Ah, even better,” I say with a wink, making her let out a giggle.
It’s at that moment that her brother appears in the doorframe, the very sight of him knocking the air out of my lungs. He’s much more dressed up than he usually is. And he’s early ?
“Evening, Farryn,” he greets his sister.
Then he turns his eyes onto me, frowning as his eyes drag down my dress. “Evening, wife.”
He fixes his gaze on the paper in my hand. “What’s that?” he asks with curiosity in his voice.
Smiling, I hand it to Farryn.
“No, he’ll be less cross with you ,” she whispers, suddenly all flustered and hiding the paper behind her back.
Just as my eyebrows pull down, Orpheus appears right in front of us. “Farryn,” he drawls with a squint.
“It’s just a drawing, brother.”
“Hand it over, Farryn, right now ,” he warns.
It’s with a low groan that she obeys.
I watch Orpheus’s face flush as his eyes land on the drawing. He snatches it and shoves it in his pocket, clearing his throat in awkwardness.
Turning his gaze onto Farryn, he grumbles, “And here I thought you’d never stoop as low as stealing from me, sister.”
I watch her eyes round. Stealing? The sneaky little thief.
“It was the only one,” she protests, “I swear.”
Her brother squints at her, that adorable flush of embarrassment still on his face. I bite my lips so as not to let out a chuckle.
I fail a little, his eyes instantly darting to mine and pulling me in. “And what are you giggling about, hm?” he demands.
Softly, teasingly, the voice like a caress that makes me lose my breath.
I frown, my mind instantly rushing to Jericho. “Nothing,” I say, clearing my throat and throwing a smile at Farryn, whose relief at not getting into more trouble than she did seems to be keeping her positively beaming.
“Are you two ready to leave?” Orpheus asks as he holds a hand out for me.
We don’t get a chance to reply.
“Your Graces,” a servant interrupts from the doorframe, “the Dowager Queen is requesting your presence in the sitting room.”
Orpheus lowers his hand, craning his neck to frown at him. “The Ball is about to start,” he protests.
“I’m afraid she insists,” the servant replies simply.
I frown. This sure is unusual.
There’s a moment of silence before Orpheus lets out a sigh and says, “Fine.”
*
It’s silence that reigns in the sitting room, broken only by Orpheus impatiently thrumming his fingers on the table before him. I keep sitting next to him, trying not to worry before we’ve even learned what this is all about.
“Something must have happened at the Congress,” Sylmarilla says, anxiousness in her voice.
No one says anything.
I let out a sigh. Orpheus’s thrumming stops. I catch a glance from him and give him a shrug.
There’s a moment of absolute silence before he gets up and holds his hand out for me.
I frown, but it’s Sylmarilla who protests. “ Orpheus .”
He shakes his head. “No, we’re not sitting here waiting for her any longer.”
“Evening—” I hear Farryn start when Urryse walks into the room.
Letting out a low grumble, Orpheus lowers himself back into his chair.
“There is talk of democracy, ” Urryse drawls as she comes to a stop in front of us, “and you are all as useless as the day you were born. More so, it could be argued.”
Everyone just looks at her in silence.
“Yes, word has gotten out that the Queen is barren and now cogs are starting to turn in those noble blasted heads of theirs. And perhaps the fact wouldn’t endanger us as much otherwise, but considering the… situation with the rest of my children…”
“What do you mean, Mother?” Sylmarilla asks cautiously.
“ Farryn and yourself , Sylmarilla, you’re still seen as mere children, and rightfully so, if I may add.”
She turns to her son, not even acknowledging the look of hurt on her daughter’s face. “ You , Orpheus, would it kill you to make yourself a touch more likable?”
Then to me. “And you , my darling daughter-in-law… Where is my heir?”
“Get to the point, Mother,” Orpheus warns.
“The point , Orpheus, is that I need you all on your best behavior, tonight more than ever before. The very future of House Olarel is at stake.”
“So it’s a Friday like any other,” Orpheus quips flatly.
“Your Graces,” the servant comes to announce, “the princesses’ chaperones have arrived.”
Urryse lets out a loud sigh. “I’m leaving. I’ll see you all at the Ball.”
“Show them in, Joseph,” Farryn says as soon as she’s gone.
There’s a flush on her face as the two young men enter.
“Finally, Lester,” Sylmarilla drawls with poison in her voice, obviously still butthurt from the incident with the mother, “Farryn was about to lose her mind with all the yearning to gaze upon your fair face.”
There’s a moment of silence that gets broken by the loud scrape of Farryn’s chair against the floor. The next second, she’s covering her face and darting out of the room.
I move to go after her.
“No, there’s no point,” Orpheus leans to tell me.
I shoot him an incredulous frown and leave anyway.
I find her in her room, sobbing.
“What should I do now, Anyi?”
I come to sit next to her. “I think you need to ask your sister to apologize and—”
“No.” She shakes her head. “It’s not Syl’s fault, she was just hurt.”
“Come on, Farryn,” I fail to stop myself from saying. “Can’t you see she has no boundaries when it comes to anyone, especially you ?”
“ Farryn ,” Sylmarilla’s voice sounds from the hallway right before she enters. “You’re leaving our guests waiting.”
Farryn abruptly gets up, looking as if she’s mustering all her courage. “It was terribly inconsiderate, what you did, Sylmarilla.”
Quickly and without a word, I excuse myself and start going back to the sitting room.
Only moments later, Sylmarilla is knocking into my shoulder with hers. She slows down to spit out, “Look what you’ve done.”
Not giving me a chance to react, she turns her back to me and darts into the sitting room. I hear her command, “We’re leaving, Seamus.”
When I walk in there myself, I first spot Lester awkwardly standing by the window. I give him a smile as I approach. “Maybe you could knock at Farryn’s door and see if she’d still like to go.”
He gives me a grateful nod and walks out of the room.
I feel Orpheus’s eyes on me even before I turn to see him sitting on the armrest of one of the chairs, one thigh draped over it and his forearm resting on his knee.
He stares at me for a moment, then pokes, “I told you you wouldn’t succeed in making them up, didn’t I?”
I shrug, opening my mouth to tell him it doesn’t matter.
It’s a sharp, sudden flutter in the pit of my stomach that makes me close my mouth, when, in one fluid movement, he gets up and starts walking over to me. By the time I’m looking up to meet those striking amber eyes, my mind is blank.
Devastatingly handsome, that’s how he looks tonight.
“Shall we?” he asks as he gives me his hand.
And there’s a touch of impatience in his voice, but for a moment, I just keep standing there, taken aback by a sudden realization of an unsettling possibility.
That these feelings I get when I’m around him might not have anything to do with my dreams of Jericho.
Just in case I’m right, I glance at his hand and say, “No one here to be suspicious of us.”
And with that, I push past him. “But yes,” I call back over my shoulder, “if we don’t leave now, we might not find a Ball to attend.”
I sense him hesitate, but then he comes to fall into step with me in silence.
Alright, I tell myself. It’s not like we’ve ever spent any significant time together, but I think it’s time I went back to avoiding this man as much as possible.
Starting now.
*
Swirling the wine in my glass, I keep standing by one of the fountains, listening to Professor O’Connor tell the group anecdote after anecdote about the time he spent negotiating with the mermaids.
The Main Hall is beautifully decorated, with a dance floor at the center of the space and refreshment tables around it, people both dancing and buzzing around the tables in merry chatter as the music plays in the background.
The guests are a mix of faculty members, students and dignitaries of all calibers, from fae civil servants to vampire noblemen.
Now, Professor O’Connor would normally be among the more interesting to me, but right now, I’m too overwhelmed to be more than superficially engaged in the conversation.
One, I’m wondering if I should’ve used my royal status to force Lorcan and Raven to come. Two, I’m keeping an eye out for the princesses, who seem to be staying out of each other’s way. Three, I’m constantly going back to Urryse and how enraging she is, even when you put tonight’s little meeting aside.
But most of all, I’m mingling like crazy in the hopes of it all deterring a certain grumpy prince from staying by my side.
And sure, he’s barely participating in the conversation, but so far, he’s proving to be a lot less grumpy and a lot more resilient in the face of crowds than I thought he would be. So much so that, at one point, everyone in the group we’re in takes to the dance floor and I find myself alone with him.
The brother standing to my right, I glance around the hall for one of the sisters. Right now, I swear I’d even settle for Sylmarilla.
“What’s your secret?” he asks with curiosity in his voice.
Frowning, I turn to look at him. “Secret?”
He smiles. “These are all people you can barely keep in the same room without a war breaking out, but they all seem to like you. ”
“People have always liked me,” I reply flatly, catching an assessing glance from his mother from a few tables down, “even when I least deserved it.”
“Sounds like the beginning of an interesting story,” he leans to comment, dropping his voice a little.
I pull away from him. “I’m afraid it would end up disappointing.” I don’t have the heart not to at least offer a slight smile, but as soon as I do, I say, “Excuse me.”
And I walk past him, coming to inspect the table with desserts.
I sense him follow me. It makes me grit my teeth when I feel his eyes on my nape. There’s a moment of silence before he leans to ask, a mix of confusion and tension in the voice that seems to be enveloping us in a bubble, “Are you cross with me?”
“No,” I reply with a shake of my head. “Why would you think that?”
He comes to stand between me and the desserts, his tone brighter once again. “How about a dance then?”
“No, thank you. But if you want to dance, I don’t think anyone would care about those silly rules tonight.”
He raises his eyebrows at me softly. “You seemed to be in much higher spirits when I first came to get you. Did something happen in the meantime?”
I shrug, my heart sinking. “I’m just not in the mood for dancing.”
I have to force myself to move to walk past him. He blocks my way. “Is it the incident with my sisters that’s dampened your mood?”
I inhale deeply, but I still snap a little. “It’s your entire family that’s dampened my mood.”
Professor O’Connor tries to approach us again, but Orpheus sends him on his way with a glare.
Then he turns those eyes onto me . “I see,” he leans to say, a plea in his voice, “you are cross with me.”
I run my hand down my face. “I know you’re a prince,” I tell him as I meet his gaze with determination, “but not everything revolves around you.”
For a second, he just looks at me. “Well, the symptoms are all there,” he grumbles.
“And what am I ?” I demand. “Some thing to study?”
“You’re far too unpredictable for that ,” he complains, his jaw clenching. “Then again,” he mumbles so I can barely understand him, “if you’d at least admit to being cross with me…”
I have to fight not to throw my arms up. “Would you quit your mumbling? And no, for the last time, I’m not cross with you , I just...”
“What,” he leans to demand with urgency, “you just what?”
I just stare at him for a moment. I can’t exactly tell him the truth, can I? “We don’t exactly share values, Grimm,” I finally say, “so there’s bound to be friction.”
A muscle in his jaw jumps. “Explain.”
I have to fight not to let out a groan. “Your sisters get into a huge fight and you don’t even bat an eye?”
And now his jaw is clenching. He doesn’t ask, he just pulls me with him to the dance floor and wraps his arm around my waist, knocking all air out of my lungs. I go limp, unable to force myself to leave. Then he makes it even worse by leaning to speak into my ear in that smooth yet rough voice of his, “There is no end to vapid little dramas I’m forced to bear witness to. If I let every single one of them affect me, I’d never even make it out of bed.”
I take a moment to collect myself. “Yes, it’s much better to spend all your time not caring about anyone but yourself.”
“I’ve had the unique opportunity to spend a lifetime closely studying people who don’t care about anyone but themselves,” he snaps. “I call them my family.”
“Unique opportunity?” I echo mockingly. “Oh cry me a river, Grimm. You think you’re the only one?”
He pulls away to find me frowning. The music dies down, making us come to a stop.
Then, to my surprise, he lets go of my waist and smiles. “Why don’t we go for a stroll?” he asks in a softer voice. “After all that fussing with the decorations, the gardens should be a sight to behold.”
Images of solitary walkways and shadowy corners flash through my mind. I shake my head. “I think I’d like to stay inside, but please, don’t let me keep you.”
He thinks for a second. Then he tilts his head at me. “Alright, we could do an indoor stroll then.”
My eyebrows shoot up. “Indoor stroll?”
“Yes,” he smirks with this mysteriousness in his voice. “Wouldn’t you like a tour around the Main Hall with the person whose sitting room it used to be?”
*
“What else?” I nudge as I let him keep leading me through the crowd along the west wall. I don’t know when’s the last time I had this much fun.
“That notch up there,” he says, pointing at the spot between a tapestry and a niche with a statue.
“Yes?” I ask, not even trying to hide the eagerness in my voice.
He doesn’t stop walking, but he does lean to say, “It was in this very room that the first war council was held, did you know that?”
I raise my eyebrows at him then pull them down. “I didn’t.” My eyes dart back up again as we pass the spot. “Don’t tell me, some huge fight broke out?”
“Yes,” he replies with a somber nod, “a couple of years later, when Sylmarillla was first forbidden to see Lord Metzinger’s son.”
When I turn to throw him a flat glare, I find a smirk tugging at his lips. I roll my eyes and blow a laugh through my nose. “You idiot,” I mutter.
I stop to take a pastry off the table to my right.
“Oh I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” he warns as he comes to sit on the edge of the table.
I freeze, poison and weird spells on my mind. “What is it?” I ask a little breathlessly.
He laughs. “It’s got rosemary.”
I frown.
“You hate rosemary,” he says simply.
I try to remember what it tastes like. I fail, but I still protest, “I don’t hate rosemary.”
“Oh yes you do.”
“Who made you the authority on my preferences?”
He quirks an eyebrow at me. “Says she to the person who’s been cooking for her for the past four months.” He folds his arms. “And you probably think it was all a coincidence, for example, that you only had to have that chicken and rosemary pie once ?”
Ah. That was rosemary. Yes, I do hate rosemary. But I’m not about to admit it.
“No no, go on, try it,” he insists with a smirk. “You know best, don’t you?”
I roll my eyes, but I take a bite, failing to stop myself from making a face.
He laughs. “Was the humble servant right after all, princess ?”
I raise my eyebrows at him. “ Princess ? You take that back, Grimm, right this instant,” I demand.
He snatches the rest of the pastry from my hand and pops it into his mouth. He pretends to think as he eats it. Then he shakes his head. “No, I don’t think I will. You get exactly what you want, and you don’t even have to bother learning what it is.” He stands straight and smirks at me. “Sounds a lot like a princess to me.”
I fold my arms and throw him a defiant look. “I’ll have you know I once ate almost exclusively stale crackers for over twelve months in a row, and I’d be able to go back to that without so much as batting an eye.”
He leans to whisper in my ear, his voice smokier than usual, “That only makes you a princess in dire need of more spoiling.”
“Would you stop it with the princess?” I protest with an awkward laugh. “You’re being terribly annoying.”
He chuckles. “Am I?”
“Yes, I’m this close to making the next thing that comes out of your mouth the last.”
“Yes, well, I have to admit I would prefer not to die tonight. I only have one question. How do I know when I’m being terribly annoying ? Are the symptoms the same as when you’re cross with me?” He quirks an eyebrow at me, waiting.
I press my lips tight. “Fine, I’ll admit it and then we can drop it. When it comes to food, I really am absolutely clueless, so it’s quite possible for someone else to know my preferences better than I do.”
It’s in a serious voice that I say it all, feeling relieved when he turns a little more serious himself. “Why did you eat almost exclusively stale crackers for over twelve months in a row?” he asks.
I shrug. “Maybe I’m simply that unsophisticated, like a true commoner. Who taught you to cook like you do anyway?” I ask, wanting to shift the attention away from myself. “The royal chef? Or did you children spend afternoons baking pies with Mother?”
He blows a laugh through his nose. “Cooking is just chemistry. And chemistry is something I’ve always been good at.”
I frown. “But how did you end up learning in the first place? What with all the actual servants, I’m finding it hard to imagine your family pushing you into it.”
He shrugs, turning pensive. “It was shortly after I came back from the war that I taught myself. It was a means to an end. More than ever before, I just wanted to be left alone.”
It’s in a softer voice that I ask, “You didn’t even give your family the opportunity to be there for you?”
He laughs. “My family? Be there for me? You mean the mother who didn’t even try to understand why it was that her son came back a changed man, or the sisters who followed her example by treating him as if he were someone to be wary of?” he shakes his head. “No, they were the reason I wanted to be left alone in the first place.”
My heart sinks. “That sounds horrible.”
He waves a hand in dismissal and continues in a more upbeat voice, “Not any more horrible than some of my other experiences with my family. But I just use it all.”
I raise my eyebrows, nudging him to speak.
He smiles. “For example, when I was five years old, we were moving from the Winter to the Summer Palace as we did every single year until then. But this time, Mother came to announce they wouldn’t be bringing me with them. I don’t know what particular agenda or whim was in her head at the time, but they actually left me in front of the gate, with my suitcases and everything. I think it was only a couple of hours later that they returned to get me, but until then, I’d already lived through a lot. What struck me most, was that the world keeps moving even if your heart is breaking, everything from the ants to the sun. And that’s how I got interested in science.”
“Ah, people being specks of dirt.”
He narrows his eyes at me. “Why are you saying it like that?”
“I don’t think you understand what happened there.”
“Really? Well, enlighten me.”
“You got terribly hurt as a child and you came up with a lie to make yourself feel better about it,” I say simply.
He just looks at me for a moment, squinting, but taken aback.
Someone bumps into us. “Pardon me, Lord Grimm.”
He snaps out of it, letting out a low grumble as he follows the man with his eyes.
I chuckle.
He turns his eyes onto me and I bite my lips, but I’m still smiling. “Yes?” he demands in a playful voice. “Go on, out with it.”
“Nothing,” I rush to say, trying to wipe the smile off my face and failing.
He comes closer, his eyes pinning me in place. “No no, you’re not wiggling your way out of it,” he says with a smile. “What is it about me that you keep finding so amusing?”
I shrug, my lips refusing to stop tugging into a smile. “How fitting it is, what everyone calls you, and how grumpy you really are.”
“And what is it that everyone calls me?” he asks, this urgency in his voice. “Have you been asking people questions about me, hm? That’s not fair, you should be asking me. ”
I vigorously shake my head, my smile growing wider. “No, I think I’ll just keep asking around, I don’t believe the Grimm Reaper himself would be so upfront with some of the information.”
He squints at me.
“Oh you must not like that nickname. Don’t worry, I could find something else to call you. Something equally worthy of your reputation. Yes, let’s see… Orpheus, Orpheus, Orpheee… Phee Phee?”
He comes closer, making me press my back against a pillar to keep the distance. “Ah, you don’t realize the joke is on you, ” he drawls.
“Really? And why is that?”
He cages me with one hand. “Because you can call me whatever you want,” he tells me. “You can snicker all you want as well.” He takes a rose out of my hair and takes a whiff, locking eyes with me as he drops his voice. “In fact, I think you’d be surprised to see how endlessly forgiving of all kinds of behaviors I can be.”
For a moment, I just breathlessly stare at him.
Then I clear my throat and duck out, my heart pounding.
But when I turn to face him again, he’s clearing his throat and giving me a smile. “I imagine you’re quite tired of only speaking to the grump this entire time. Why don’t we find some company?”
It’s so normal, the way he says this, that I think I must’ve imagined him flirting with me just now.
Breathing a sigh of relief, I say, “Yes, let’s do that.”
“Where have you two been hiding?” Urryse appears to demand, fixing her eyes on me.
She doesn’t let us answer though. “Everyone, may I have your attention please.”
“How lovely it is,” her voice booms across the hall, making the dancers come to a stop, “to see you all enjoying yourselves this much.”
I glance at Orpheus, finding him frowning.
“I would like to take this opportunity to express my gratitude for your presence tonight. The Grimm Academy is a relatively new institution, but there is absolutely no doubt that it will remain a pillar in our community for centuries to come.”
There’s a bout of clapping.
“But enough solemnity. This is a party after all. And what better way to celebrate the New Year than to enjoy the bloom of a new love?”
My heart leaps to my throat when she sweeps her arm in our direction, and everyone’s eyes turn to us. “May I present to you my son and my daughter-in-law, the most charming couple that has graced us with their presence tonight.”
The damn woman. I knew she’d try to take advantage of my sudden popularity somehow.
Almost instantly, the crowd starts chanting, “Kiss kiss kiss.”
Feeling blood rush to my cheeks, I glance up at Orpheus, who seems to be flushing as well, frozen in place.
When the crowd just keeps chanting, I decide to cut it all short and give him a kiss on the cheek. I turn to face him, leaning to do as planned and watching him go even more rigid.
He leans as well and instead of brushing against his cheek, my lips land on the corner of his, the contact making me draw in a breath.
We stay frozen for a split second, my heart skipping a beat and then starting to pound when his mouth finds mine. And then he’s sliding his arm around my waist and I find myself unable to stop him when his lips part mine and I feel his tongue start stroking mine, slowly, deliciously.
It’s the cheering that makes me snap out of it, finding myself flushed and staring at an equally flushed Orpheus.
*
Why does it feel like I’m losing my goddamn mind with this man, as if, when I’m with him, I’m really with Jericho?
“I should get back,” I rush to say, clearing my throat and turning on my heel to start immediately marching out of the Hall, my mind buzzing.
He comes to block my way. “You're tired,” he says in a low, rough voice, “let me get you.”
I shake my head and move to push past him.
“Can't you just let me take you?” he snaps a little.
For a moment, I just look at him. “Fine.”
He bends and sweeps me off my feet, making me put my arms around his shoulders.
What am I doing?
Riddled with guilt, as soon as he stops in front of my bedroom door, I say, “You can let me down now.”
He does as he’s told. “Thank you and good night,” I mutter.
“Join me for a nightcap.”
“I’m tired.”
It’s before I even manage to turn around that I hear him grumble something in that old fae language.
I turn to frown at him. “Again with the mumbling?”
His jaw clenches. “I'm saying I have the worst wife ever.”
“Really?”
“Yes. She spends entire evenings locked up in her room, she calls me Grimm, she’s always cross with me…” He leans closer and puts a palm of his hand on the door beside my head, partially caging me in.
“What are you doing?” I ask a little breathlessly.
“But worst of all,” he continues in a lower, rougher voice, “she’s never once invited me to her bed.”
Gritting my teeth, I move to push him away. He catches my wrist in his grip. “Forgive my impertinence,” he urges. Then he leans to whisper in my ear, “Another kiss is all I ask.”
I break my wrist free. “I’m not your real wife,” I snap and turn around to open the door.
He grabs me by the waist with one hand and threads the fingers of the other through my hair, tugging my head back and pressing his lips to the corner of my mouth. It makes me lose my breath, my mind flashing with memories of Jericho doing the exact same thing.
“I know you feel it too,” he whispers, “so why do you insist on being so cruel to me, Anyi? Don’t you think you’ve mourned long enough?”
This makes anger flare up inside me, and I use Movement to control my own body for the first time. I dart away from him and then back, getting in his face with my teeth gritting.
“For your information, if I don’t get him back, which I will , I will spend the rest of my life mourning, so stay the hell away from me.”