Chapter 21
I thought that the day I stood naked in front of a man, I would die of embarrassment. I don’t hate my body, but I also know it doesn’t fit the standards of fashion magazines or TV commercials. So I thought I’d feel uncomfortable on some level when I had to reveal myself to a guy.
Now, if you’re paying attention to what you’re reading, you’ll notice that I said reveal myself to a guy.
Alright, so at this moment, you need to form the image I had while I was exposed to Guillermo at the counter.
Since he entered the kitchen, I couldn’t look away.
I’ve always seen him in elegant suits, which in my mind made all the differences between us more obvious.
However, tonight, he’s wearing loose sweatpants, a shirt that outlines all the muscles of his chest, which I could feel in my hands—God bless weightlifting—and wet hair from the shower.
Guillermo’s scent, his strong grip, and his look of desire for me suddenly made all the barriers between us disappear. As if we were just two people very much into each other.
No, I’m not going to start making a thousand analyses of why getting involved with each other is stupid. Let me live my Cinderella night in peace, please.
I’m sure I’ll never be able to eat brigadeiro again without remembering what just happened, and I’m already thinking about how many sweets I know how to make for us to try.
After I came, I didn’t know what to expect. Or rather, I knew in a certain way.
I’ve read a lot of romance novels. In them, the guy prepares the woman for sex with foreplay—and I’m sure you agree, what amazing foreplay!—and then makes love to her.
I was kind of looking forward to that.
Twenty-three years is too long to not know the pleasures of sex, and I think anyone in my place, given the opportunity to be initiated by that hot man, would be too.
After I climaxed, however, he picked me up and carried me to what I imagine is his bedroom. I was all sticky from the sweet and a little embarrassed because of it, to be honest, so it was a relief when he walked to the bathroom, turned on the shower, gave me a kiss, and left.
I assumed I should take a shower and was unsure whether to close the door or not, but then I decided he had already seen too much for me to be shy at that point.
So I unzipped my dress and was almost taking off my bra when he came back.
The urge to grab a towel and cover myself was strong, but I held firm, looking at him without flinching.
He was holding a shirt and what looked like boxer briefs, but as soon as he saw me naked, his eyes fixed on my breasts.
“Take it off,” he said, pointing to the bra. “Show me.”
I felt a mixture of excitement and shame, but still, I put my hand between my breasts and undid the clasp. The bra fell to my feet, and then I was completely exposed to his eyes.
“Damn, Olívia.”
He lifted me in his arms, and without any warning, took one of my breasts into his mouth, sucking with such hunger that I felt myself ignite in seconds.
The realization of not being on my own feet anymore, while my body was flooded with various sensations, made me cling to those strong shoulders, begging for more.
When it was getting amazing, he stopped, breathing heavily.
Then, he showered my face with kisses and gently placed me inside the shower.
The warm water brought me back to reality, and I couldn’t look at him.
Again, these aren’t the actions the heroes in books take. If our relationship were a romance, he’d probably put me on the counter and we’d have hot, sweaty sex. Instead, however, he kissed my mouth with such tenderness that it confused my mind.
Afterward, he smiled and said he’d wait for me downstairs.
I’m not used to so much human contact since my mother died.
I’ve made a lot of acquaintances in the past year, especially at the café, but nothing that goes beyond superficial relationships.
People are friendly, but they don’t necessarily want to know how we really are.
So, you can imagine how this excess of attention overwhelmed my head.
I took a quick shower, drying my hair as best I could, and put on the oversized shirt and boxer briefs.
I tiptoed downstairs, like a criminal breaking into a bank in the middle of the night, because I really didn’t know how to act, but before I could think much about it, he appeared at the bottom of the stairs and without saying a word, reached out his hand to me.
It didn’t cross my mind to refuse. I hadn’t had nearly enough of him.
Still, I wasn’t expecting him to lie down on one of the sofas and pull me onto his body.
Now, several minutes have passed, and he hasn’t let me go.
We’re as close as physically possible, and he caresses my back. “Was your shower nice?”
No more than being hugged by you, I think but keep my mouth shut. “It was nice and much needed,” I reply.
I feel his body tremble beneath mine, and I lift my head to check if he’s laughing.
“I think brigadeiro just became my favorite sweet,” he says, with the world’s most mischievous and sexy grin.
“It’s always been mine, but now you’ve taken the word ‘delight’ to a whole other level. Can I ask you something?”
“Go ahead,” he responds, but I suddenly feel him tense, the laughter dying.
“Why don’t we . . . uh . . . I wanted to . . .”
He kisses me. “I want to too, but it won’t happen tonight.”
“Why?”
“Because I want to get to know you better.”
“I didn’t think people needed to be friends to have sex.”
He catches me off-guard by giving me a playful smack on the butt. “My naughty girl.”
I climb up his body to kiss him. “I’m a treat. You proved that yourself.”
“Tease.”
“Not really, but I know what I want.”
“I do too, but I prefer to take it slow. I had no idea you were a virgin.”
“Is it a crime to have not had sex? If you’re worried because I’m inexperienced, know that I learn quickly,” I say, trying to lighten the mood because the conversation is heading in a direction I don’t desire.
I don’t want to be treated as something sacred.
I’m not creating any illusions in my head other than good sex.
“There’s no problem in being a virgin. And I have no doubts about your learning ability.” He winks. “But there are some things we need to clarify first.”
“Rules?”
“What do you mean?”
“I’ve read some books where the hot CEO sets rules about not mixing feelings with a purely sexual relationship.”
Now he bursts into genuine laughter and bites my lip. “God, you’re something else.” There are laughter lines around his eyes. “Am I the hot CEO, then?” He seems to hold back another laugh with effort.
“I can’t deny it. You’re a CEO and very hot.”
He takes a strand of my hair. “I wasn’t thinking about rules but about letting things happen and you being sure that I’m the guy you want to initiate you into sex. There are some things you need to know about me. I just need a few more days.”
“Do you have a girlfriend? Because I’ll never get involved with a committed guy.” The mere idea horrifies me so much that I try to get up.
“I already said I’m free.”
“What then?”
He holds me tightly in his arms. “Don’t think too much and don’t create any doubts in that beautiful head of yours. I want you. That won’t change.”
“But . . .”
“Shhh . . . Let me just hold you for a bit, okay? Tell me something secret. Something no one else knows.”
“Those kinds of secrets are usually embarrassing. Besides, Mom knew them all.”
“I don’t just want cute secrets. Prove you trust me. Tell me something really dark.”
I lift my head from his chest again, trying to decide. “I’ll tell you two. One isn’t so bad. I’ve read ‘Sense and Sensibility’ twenty-seven times.”
He looks at me incredulously, as if expecting me to laugh at any moment, but when I keep a serious face, he turns us sideways on the couch to see me better. “Why so many times? What is it about that book that fascinates you?”
“The way the contrast between the protagonists is portrayed. The two sisters—one is sense and the other sensibility, and as you can guess, they have totally different reactions to the loss of love.”
“Which one would you be?”
“I’ve asked myself that question a lot. When I was a teenager, I’d definitely have been Marianne, sensibility, but after I lost my mother, I needed to be Elinor, sense, to be able to stay strong.
I was alone in the world.” I look away from him because I’m ashamed of opening up so much. “I think today I’m a mix of both.”
His face is serious when I return my gaze to him, and I don’t want to ruin our night.
“And now, ready for the dark secret?”
He seems to realize my maneuver, but lets me go on with it, much to my relief. “Tell me.”
“I’m a fan of nineties horror movies.”
“No way.”
“I swear. The Blair Witch Project, Bride of Chucky, Candyman, Scream.”
“You’re kidding. I have all of them. They’re so much fun, but there are also some eighties classics you have to watch. We need to organize a marathon.”
I try not to show my astonishment, but I can’t. Is Guillermo making plans for the two of us?
Overwhelmed by everything that’s happened tonight, I snuggle into his chest.
He lies back on the couch, pulling me onto him, keeping his arms locked around me.