Chapter 30
Chapter thirty
Morning After Regrets.
Percy Flores
Iawoke to the feeling of Selene pressing a kiss against my shoulder, her arm over my waist, pulling me into her.
“Good morning, how did you sleep?” she asked.
The previous day’s events flooded my mind; images of Edward broken and dead, the sound of the King slapping Selene, and the way I couldn’t control my need for her after being separated for so long.
Selene pulled me closer.
“What’s wrong?” she asked.
What had I done? How could I have allowed the previous night to happen? The way she drew me into her warmth and pressed gentle, caring kisses to my shoulder was painful. Painful because I knew it couldn’t last, because I knew it had to be the last time she ever held or cared for me in such a way.
Arvid had warned me that the King had been vicious and ruthless, but his assessment that he was somehow less so now had been wrong.
He had Edward killed just to prove that he could and would do as he threatened.
He slapped his own daughter. He said he had people watching my family and village, and he knew of the birth of my brother, which told me he wasn’t lying, and he didn’t strike me as the kind to bluff.
I couldn’t risk anyone else. I loved Selene more than I knew it was possible to love someone, but I also loved my family and friends. I couldn’t live with myself if they died because of me.
Father was right. I should have listened to him. I should have allowed him to send me away. It would have been painful, but not as painful as this. Not as painful as watching Edward’s death. Not as painful as having to break Selene’s heart the way I knew I had to.
Selene was intelligent and strong, but she couldn’t protect me from everything. She couldn’t protect me and everyone I cared for from her father.
I took her hand that lay against my stomach and removed myself from her embrace.
“Percy?” she asked as I sat up, and kept my back towards her.
“It was a mistake,” I said.
I felt the bed shift as she sat up, and I shook off her hand when she tried to turn me to face her.
“What was a mistake?” she asked.
“Last night. Coming back here to you. I meant what I said when I told you I wanted to go home,” I got out of bed and began picking up my discarded clothes.
When I pulled my shirt over my head, Selene was waiting for me, her brow drew in confusion.
“Why are you saying such things?” she asked me.
I looked away as I continued to put my top on. She gripped my shoulders, stopping me from continuing to get dressed.
“Answer me, Percy,” she commanded.
“I don’t want to be with you anymore, Selene,” I told her and pulled myself out of her grip to continue getting dressed.
“Where has all this come from? What happened to you while we were separated?” she demanded.
I didn’t answer, and she sighed heavily and walked over to the closet. She returned to me and sat clothing on the bed.
“Put this on,” she instructed as she quickly got dressed herself.
She had selected thick grey joggers, a white top, and a quarter zip sweater for me to wear.
I pulled off my old top and got dressed into what she had given me.
“Now will you talk to me?” Selene asked as she finished buttoning up her shirt.
“I’ve already told you everything that matters. I want to go home,” I said.
“Percy,” she growled, “I’m growing impatient. You will explain to me where your sudden desire to leave has come from.”
I looked at her then and saw the confusion, the frustration, the concern all expressed in the way she looked back at me, and I knew that she would never simply let me go. I knew I would have to make her, that I would have to hurt her.
“Isn’t it enough that I don’t want to be with you? Why do you need anything more than that?” I asked.
She stepped forward and took hold of me by my arms. I tried to pull myself free from her, but she didn’t let me.
“Because I know you don’t want that. I know you don’t mean what you are saying. Because you are mine, and you’re never leaving me again,” she said, and it sounded like a promise, like a threat. “Now tell me truthfully what has you behaving like this?”
“Maybe I’m done being abducted and attacked and watching everyone die. Maybe I just want to be safe. Being your soul match is dangerous for everyone, and I don’t want it,” I told her, frustrated, my stomach twisting and burning as the words left me.
“Percy, I’m so sorry and ashamed that I have failed to adequately protect you. But I promise you will never be in such danger again. I will take every precaution necessary. You will never be left unprotected, you will never be taken from me again,” she said.
“It’s not good enough. You know it’s not good enough.
You know you’re lying. You know you can’t truly protect me, no matter how hard you try.
Life is dangerous. But life with you is a death sentence.
You asked what happened when we were separated.
I was free from you. Free to think for myself.
Free from constant stares, judgment, danger, and I realised that I don’t…
I don’t…” The words were stuck in my throat, and I tried to stay strong, forceful, but my eyes began to burn with unshed tears.
“I realised that I don’t love you anymore,” I finally told her quietly.
Her expression, which was open and full of concern and pain, became a blank mask of indifference that I couldn’t read.
“Is that how you truly feel?” she asked me, her voice steady, and it scared me how emotionless she seemed.
“Yes,” I whispered, keeping eye contact with her, even though I could barely speak.
“Then it is unfortunate for you that your blood is so intoxicating,” she stepped towards me and domineeringly took hold of my waist.
“Selene!” I protested.
She leaned down to my ear.
“Address me with the correct titles and honorifics; a bloodbag does not have the privilege of addressing me by name,” she told me with frightening calm, pressing her nose against the column of my neck and inhaling deeply.
“Love me or hate me, it does not change your circumstances. You are mine.” She pulled me against her.
“Do you understand?” she demanded, her lips ghosting across my skin as she spoke.
“I… You can’t keep me here against my will,” I protested.
She made an amused sound and nipped my neck painfully.
“Have you forgotten that you sold yourself to me? You are property, pet. You belong to me. And I will do what I please with what is mine,” she said, her arms wrapping around my waist, holding me tight against her.
I tried to push her away, but it was useless; I couldn’t escape her hold, no matter how much I tried.
“Please, Selene —” I tried to plead but was interrupted by a nasty bite that included her fangs and broke my skin. Without the effects of arousal and sensitivity, it was simply painful, and I cried out.
“Do not use my name,” she corrected, and began to lick the wound she had created.
“Stop this. Just let me go home,” I begged.
“Your home is wherever I am,” she declared, as she began to mark me.
I couldn’t stop her, couldn’t control the situation. For the first time, I did not welcome a marking.
“I know I have upset you, but —”
“Shh, little pet. I’m done listening to your demands,” she silenced me as she nipped and licked and sucked the skin of my neck.
Despite my concern for her sudden change in behaviour, I couldn’t control the way my body reacted to her ministrations. My neck was hot and sensitive, and it was an effort not to respond vocally.
After what felt like a long time, she lifted her head from my neck and seemed satisfied with herself.
“You are confined to this room. You will not leave unless I accompany you. My guard will be stationed outside,” she told me as she released me from her arms and walked away as if nothing had happened.
Her demeanour was similar to how she had been when we first met: cold, indifferent to me, and I worried about how badly I had upset her and how much my rejection of her love might affect her. Yet I knew I could not avoid upsetting her, that I had to, if I was going to convince her to let me leave.
As soon as the door closed behind her, I felt a coldness creep into my chest again. I didn’t have much time to dwell on the return of the unpleasant sensation as there was a knock on the door.
A maid entered with a trolley holding a tray of breakfast foods.
“Her Royal Highness has requested breakfast,” she announced as she pushed the trolley past me and into the room towards the little coffee table and armchairs.
She was quick to set up and leave.
I had no appetite, but I knew Selene would be upset if I ignored it completely, so I poured myself a cup of black coffee and sipped. As I sat down, the corner of something under a plate of French toast caught my attention, and I lifted the plate to find an envelope.
I hesitated to open it, but it had no name and was not sealed:
Remember what is expected of you. You have until the opening ceremony before the first of your friends pays the price for your failure.
My hands trembled as I put the paper back into the envelope and left the envelope where I had found it under the plate.
It was from the King. He was showing me that he could reach me anywhere, even here in the one room in this entire castle that Selene trusted.
The opening ceremony? I didn’t even know when it was, but I did know it had to be desperately soon.
I felt like my chest was caving in on itself. I struggled to breathe; my heart pounded loudly in my ears. I tried to pick up my cup of coffee, but my hands were numb, and it felt like I had been hit by a cold wave.
The door opened, and I got such a fright. Suddenly, everything was so much worse. What had I done? Why did everyone keep being killed around me? It was always somehow my fault, and I never meant to hurt anyone.
Heidi had entered the room.
“Percy, I believe you are hyperventilating,” she said.
“What?” I managed to gasp out, slumped forward in the chair.