Chapter 19
MIHALIS
The kiss breaks apart slowly, reluctantly, and I find myself staring down at Heidi's face with something that feels dangerously close to worship.
Her eyes are clear now, no longer clouded with pain, and the color has returned to her skin in a way that makes the bond between us sing with satisfaction.
But even as relief floods through me, a cold knot of fear settles in my stomach.
What I did—binding her when she could barely speak, when she was delirious with pain and hardly capable of true consent—it goes against everything I've ever believed about choice and autonomy. The kind of thing I'd kill another male for doing to a woman under my protection.
"Heidi." Her is a broken plea, weighted with guilt I can't quite shake. "I know you must be angry. What happened here—I took your choice away from you. I couldn’t just watch while I lost you.”
She tilts her head, studying my face with those storm-gray eyes that see too much. A small frown creases her brow, and I brace myself for her anger, for the inevitable moment when she realizes what I've done and starts fighting me again.
"I know what you did," she says softly. "I was aware enough to hear most of it."
The knot in my stomach tightens. "Then you know I didn't give you a real choice. You were dying, barely conscious—"
"Mihalis." Her hand comes up to cup my jaw, thumb stroking over the stubble I haven't bothered to shave in days. "Stop."
"I couldn't let you die." The words burst out of me before I can stop them, raw with the terror I've been carrying since I found her collapsed in that freezing apartment.
"I know that's selfish, I know I should have respected your decision to leave, but I couldn't—fuck, I couldn't just watch you fade away because you were too stubborn to accept help. "
Through the bond, I feel her emotions shift. Not anger, as I expected, but something softer. Understanding, maybe. Or forgiveness I don't deserve.
She's quiet for a long moment, her thumb still moving against my skin in soothing circles that make my chest ache with how much I've missed her touch. When she speaks, her voice is barely above a whisper.
"I wanted to complete the bond."
Hope expands in my chest. "What?"
"Before I got so sick I could barely think." She shifts on the altar, pushing herself into a sitting position despite my attempt to keep her lying down. "I missed you. I missed Irida. I missed your house and your staff and the way you'd look at me when you thought I wasn't paying attention."
Her free hand finds mine, fingers interlacing with a certainty that makes the bond between us pulse with warmth. "I wanted to come home, Mihalis. I just—I got too sick to make it back on my own."
Relief crashes over me so hard it's almost painful. The guilt that's been eating at me since I carried her unconscious form into this temple begins to ease, replaced by something fierce and protective and completely possessive.
"You're sure?" I have to ask, even though I can feel the truth of her words through our connection. "This isn't just the bond talking, or gratitude because I helped you when you were dying?"
She laughs, and the sound is like sunlight breaking through storm clouds. "The bond helps, I won't lie about that. But what I feel for you—this isn't magic, Mihalis. This is choice. Mine, made with a clear head and full knowledge of what I'm agreeing to."
Her eyes search mine, looking for something I'm not sure she'll find. "The question is whether you can accept that. Whether you can trust that I'm here because I want to be, not because some mystical force is compelling me."
I study her face, drinking in every detail. The way her dark hair falls in waves around her shoulders, the stubborn tilt to her chin, the storm-gray eyes that have haunted my dreams for days. She looks stronger already, the bond having restored much of the vitality the separation drained from her.
But more than that, she looks determined. Like she's made a decision and won't be swayed from it.
"I can accept that," I say finally, leaning down to press my forehead against hers. "As long as you can accept that I'm never letting you leave again."
Her smile is radiant. "I don't want any more space, remember? I think I've had enough of that to last several lifetimes."
Unable to resist, I press a soft kiss to her forehead, breathing in the scent of her hair and letting myself acknowledge how close I came to losing everything that matters.
"I promised you space," I murmur against her skin.
"But there was only so much I could take.
When I felt you dying through the bond—"
"Hey." She pulls back just enough to meet my eyes. "I'm here now. We're both here, and we're both alive, and that's what matters."
The simple certainty in her voice settles something restless in my chest. She's right, of course. We survived the separation, survived the bond trying to kill us both, survived my own desperate attempt to save her. Everything else is just details we can work through later.
"Come on," I say, standing and offering her my hand. "Let's go home. Irida has been asking about you constantly, and Thera's been threatening to dose me with sleeping draughts if I don't stop pacing."
Heidi's face lights up at the mention of my daughter. "How is she? I worried—leaving so suddenly, I didn't want her to think I abandoned her."
"She knows better than that." I help her to her feet, steadying her when she sways slightly. The bond has restored most of her strength, but she's still recovering from days of magical exhaustion. "She's been convinced you'd come back. More convinced than I was, honestly."
We make our way out of the temple slowly, my arm around her waist both to support her and because I need the contact. After days of that awful empty feeling where the bond used to be, having her close feels like being able to breathe again.
The carriage ride home passes in comfortable silence, her hand in mine and her head resting against my shoulder. I can feel her contentment through our connection, mixed with anticipation and a bone-deep relief that mirrors my own.
When we reach the house, I barely have time to help Heidi out of the carriage before the front door flies open and a small tornado in the shape of my daughter comes racing down the path.
"Heidi! Heidi, you came back!" Irida launches herself into Heidi's arms with complete disregard for the fact that she was nearly dying a few hours ago. "I knew you would! Dad said you were away but I told him you'd come home!"
Heidi catches her easily, spinning her around once before setting her down and kneeling to her level.
The sight of them together—my daughter's bright smile and Heidi's gentle hands smoothing down Irida's curls—does something to my chest that has nothing to do with magic and everything to do with family.
"I missed you so much, little spark," Heidi says, her voice thick with emotion. "I'm sorry I was gone for so long."
"It's okay," Irida says with the easy forgiveness of a child. "You're home now. And Dad is much less grumpy, which is good because he was getting really scary when he didn't think I was looking."
I snort at that, reaching down to ruffle my daughter's hair. "I was not scary."
"You made Varos hide in the kitchen yesterday when you started growling at the wall," Irida informs me seriously. "That's pretty scary."
Heidi looks up at me with raised eyebrows and badly suppressed laughter. "Growling at walls? Really?"
"The wall wasn't responding to reasonable requests for information about your location," I mutter, feeling heat rise in my cheeks.
"Dad was being dramatic," Irida stage-whispers to Heidi. "Thera said so."
As if summoned by her name, Thera appears in the doorway, wiping her hands on her apron and wearing the kind of satisfied expression that usually means trouble for me.
"Well, well," she says, looking between Heidi and me with sharp eyes that don't miss the way we're standing closer together, the way my hand rests possessively on Heidi's lower back. "You look much better, Mihalis. Less like a corpse and more like a functioning adult."
I level her with what I hope is a withering stare. "Your concern is touching, as always."
She snorts, completely unimpressed. "My concern is for that poor girl you've been moping over and the child who's had to watch her father fall apart because he'd never experienced an emotion before."
"I did not fall apart," I say with as much dignity as I can muster.
"You forgot to eat for three days straight and I had to remind you to bathe," Thera replies dryly. "If that's not falling apart, I'd hate to see what you consider a real breakdown."
Heidi's shoulders shake with suppressed laughter, and even Irida is giggling behind her hands. I glare at all of them with absolutely no heat.
"For your information," I say to Thera, "we completed the bond. Properly this time."
Thera's expression softens slightly, though she tries to hide it. "About damn time," she mutters. "Maybe now we can get back to some kind of normal around here."
She turns to Heidi with a smile that's genuinely warm. "Welcome home, girl. Your room is just as you left it, and I've got soup warming on the stove if you're hungry."
"Thank you," Heidi says softly. "It's good to be back."
Thera nods once, satisfied, then turns and heads back toward the kitchen, calling over her shoulder, "I'll leave you three to get reacquainted. Try not to break anything important."
Irida tugs on Heidi's hand, bouncing on her toes with barely contained excitement. "Heidi! Heidi, guess what? Tomorrow is the last day of Noxalyth. That means today there are going to be processions! With dancers and fire-breathers and musicians and everything!"
Heidi kneels down to Irida's level again, genuine interest lighting up her face. "That sounds amazing. Tell me more about these processions."
"They go all through the city," Irida says, her words tumbling over each other in her enthusiasm.
"And there are people who can make fire dance in the air, and singers, and sometimes there are people on stilts!
Thera told me that last year someone brought a tame rono and painted flowers on its horns! "
"A rono?" Heidi looks delighted. "That must have been quite a sight."
"Can we go see them?" Irida asks, looking between Heidi and me with hopeful eyes. "Please? I've never been to see the processions before, and now that you're back we could all go together!"
I feel something warm unfurl in my chest at the casual way she includes all three of us as a unit, a family. After years of it being just Irida and me against the world, the idea of expanding that circle feels both terrifying and absolutely right.
"I think that sounds wonderful," Heidi says, glancing up at me with a question in her eyes.
"If you're feeling up to it," I say carefully. She's stronger than she was this morning, but I'm not taking any chances with her health. "The crowds can be overwhelming, and you're still recovering."
"I'll be fine," she assures me, standing and slipping her hand into mine with an ease that makes my heart skip. "Besides, how can I say no to seeing painted rono horns?"
Irida cheers, throwing her arms around both our legs in an enthusiastic hug that nearly knocks us over. "This is going to be the best Noxalyth ever! We can get honey cakes from the vendors, and watch the fire dancers, and maybe see the blessing ceremony at the main temple!"
Looking down at my daughter's bright face and feeling Heidi's contentment through our bond, I can't help but agree. For the first time in longer than I care to admit, the future looks bright instead of terrifying.
"Then it's settled," I say, squeezing Heidi's hand and returning Irida's hug. "This afternoon, we'll brave the crowds and see what wonders the festival has to offer."
The smile that spreads across both their faces is worth every moment of terror I've endured in the past week.