Chapter 37
And each night Damien meditated, letting his mind float like driftwood down a river, ready to greet his dreams with a clear, light head.
One night, he was enjoying himself in Nananoonoo Land, lying on a beach with a silky dark-haired beauty, who was massaging his back with suntan oil, when Elizabeth rang.
He pulled himself out of his sleep state and snatched the phone from the bedside table.
‘Hello, Damien,’ she said, all friendly. Silence. ‘Hello… hello… Can you hear me?’
‘Yes, I can hear you,’ he replied.
‘How are you?’
He glanced at his alarm clock. ‘It’s one o’clock in the morning… a bit late for a chat.’
‘Or early… depending which way you look at it… I hear you’re back in the saddle again. Don’t think I haven’t been keeping tabs on you.’
‘You sound a bit tipsy, Elizabeth.’
‘Not at all. Just thought I’d call you… Obviously not a good idea. You’re making me feel awkward.’
‘Look, maybe we could speak later? I’ve an early morning meeting,’ he said in a weary voice.
‘There was a time when you’d have been delighted to hear from me, night or day.’
‘Elizabeth…’ Damien sighed. A shaft of moonlight peeped through the curtain, throwing a silvery light on his pale, solemn face.
What did she want, this woman who had caused him such pain, burnt him out? Should he cut her off? Maybe not… That would encourage her. Challenge her to win him back. No, he wasn’t going to jump again.
‘So, what’s up?’ he said.
‘Well… it’s Javier.’
‘Yes?’
‘He’s left me.’
He laughed. ‘I didn’t know it was that serious.’
‘Thank you for diminishing our relationship.’
‘Just assumed you were hot lovers,’ he replied. ‘Come on, Elizabeth, you can’t expect me to play the sympathetic confidant.’
‘Of course not. Anyway… I just want to say I’m sorry.’
‘For what?’ Damien rolled over and switched on the bedside light. He lay back in bed and shielded his eyes.
‘I was a terrible bitch to you.’ Her voice sounded different, kinder.
‘True.’
‘Just that Javier was so difficult.’ She hesitated.
‘So what happened?’ Damien said. ‘Come on, Elizabeth. You usually have a tongue like a switchblade. Spit it out.’
‘Please, stop bullying me.’
‘You’ve phoned me to moan about your ex in the early hours of the morning. What do you expect? The spell’s broken, Elizabeth. Get to the point.’
‘Well, he just casually said that he was going back to Buenos Aires to marry a twenty-three-year-old Argentinian girl. Told me in bed… I think he expected me to congratulate him.’
‘Maybe it’s got something to do with you. Perhaps he didn’t see you as wife material.’
‘For God’s sake, Damien, who said anything about marriage?’
‘But that’s the answer, isn’t it? An Argentinian alpha male from a wealthy conservative Catholic family, of course he wants a wife and kids. And you, what do you want?’
‘I don’t know…’
‘Why are you really ringing me? Dangling Javier in front of my nose. Seriously, Elizabeth. Why should I care if he’s left you, after what you put me through?’
‘Because I’m lonely. And I want us still to be friends. All those chess games that we played, which you mostly won and you understood so much. I didn’t have to explain anything. I miss you, Damien.’
‘Yes, well, it’s probably just because you’re not used to being hurt or alone. I’m sure you’ll get over it.’
‘So that’s it. We can’t be friends?’
Damien held the phone away from his ear.
Don’t worry, I’m still here for you , the Voice said. Now come on. Give her a wide berth. You know she’ll do it again. Get you all churned up. A sweet beginning and then – BOOM – you’ll be back down the rabbit hole. Don’t be a schmuck… Tell her to get lost.
‘Damien… come over… now…’ she whispered. ‘Why sleep alone dreaming of me when we can be together?’
Yes. Why not? It would be a good litmus test. See if he could just have sex with Elizabeth without being obsessed with her.
‘Come on, Damien, you know you’ll love it. I’ll make you so hot.’
He couldn’t hear the Voice, only hers.
He had a quick shower and dressed. Jeans, a crisp white linen shirt, slip-on loafers that he wore sockless, a last look in the mirror to check his hair, and off he went.
A warm June night. And as he revved the engine of his car his other half hoped it wouldn’t start.
Apart from the odd one-nighter, he’d managed to temper his sex addiction. And tonight he would fight the good fight. Take what he could without falling into the bottomless pit.
***
She stood at the door with a champagne glass in her hand, Titian-red hair tumbling on her shoulders just so, and she wore that green silk kimono, the one he’d bought her in a vintage store in Paris, loosely belted round her wasp waist.
Barefoot, sleek, graceful… That smile, almost real. But her eyes, they looked tired and red under the lamp light, and a web of fine lines round her mouth betrayed her age.
Wordless, she cupped the back of his neck with her hand and drew his mouth to hers. Just the lightest touch to tease.
And yet… Damien was surprised that she hadn’t used a little more imagination, a more inventive approach, not so predictable. Maybe start with friendly, and less of the textbook seductress. What happened next? More thriller. Leave him room to flex his muscles first.
He slipped his feet into a pair of Moroccan slippers. ‘Would you like a drink?’ she asked.
‘Wouldn’t mind a cup of Horlicks,’ he replied.
Elizabeth giggled. ‘You’re teasing me, aren’t you?’ She held his face between her hands. ‘Are you trying to cool me down?’
‘Nope, I’m serious. I’m on the wagon.’
‘Well, I’m afraid I don’t have any Horlicks,’ she said. ‘Not something that my guests have ever requested.’
Apparently, he had outwitted her. And he loved it. ‘Cocoa?’
‘No. I don’t think so,’ she said.
‘Never mind, a glass of water will be fine.’ He waited.
‘There’s a bottle by your bedside,’ she replied.
Your bedside . Maybe now that Javier had gone, she wanted him. Not just for a night with Damien Spur… but for something more.
She’d lost her metal edge. There was a softness about her that he hadn’t seen before… or so it seemed.
‘Well then,’ she said, ‘let’s make up for lost time.’
Minutes later, Elizabeth, legs astride, rocked back and forth while Damien, her horse, held her heaving breasts.
Faster, faster she rode and just as he was ready to explode, she cried, ‘Not yet… wait for me.’
Here we go , the Voice chipped in. She’s so controlling. What does she expect, that you’re going to have a tea break while she takes her time with Kama Sutra 54, the good old Rocking Horse?
Not that she cared what he thought. It was as if she’d forgotten he was there. He moaned just to remind her.
At last, Elizabeth reached her nirvana. ‘Ah, AH, AH … JAVIEEEER!’ She juddered, swinging her face from side to side and then with a whimper collapsed on Damien’s chest.
For a moment, he said nothing. This woman whom he’d idolised – sophisticated, beautiful and difficult to know – had revealed herself in the throes of her passion as a victim, just as he’d been with her.
‘That was wonderful.’ She swung her leg over his torso and rolled onto her back. ‘What a ride. How was it for you?’
‘What an idiot I’ve been.’ He slapped his hand on his head.
‘What are you talking about? You sound so aggressive.’ Elizabeth, wide-eyed, reached across him for the bottle of water.
‘Leave it.’ He grabbed her arm and pushed it away.
‘Now then…’ she sat up and crossed her arms, ‘…tell me why you’re behaving like a rough pig.’
‘Is that my role, to be Javier to you?’ It was better to be angry than hurt.
‘I don’t understand.’
Damien grasped her shoulders and made her look at him.
‘You called out Javier …’
‘Did I? Oh… oh, I’m so sorry,’ she said. ‘Strange, I don’t remember.’
Like hell she doesn’t , the Voice said. You’re just a proxy, a fill-in… Let’s go.
She didn’t move as he dressed. Just sat up in bed and watched him… a fox who had lost her prey. She would miss him… at least until she found another lover.
‘Goodbye, Elizabeth. Thank you for having me.’
‘The pleasure was all mine,’ she replied with a sly smile.
‘Just don’t call me again,’ he said, and left her to dream of lost love.