Chapter 2 #2
Sawyer’s jaw clenched, as if he and I remembered at the same time what he had confided after Lucan attacked me.
I was going to choose to ignore that—emotions were high that day. That was all.
Sebastian cleared his throat, then licked his forefinger, using it to flip the page of his book.
“In my defense—not that it really helps—I didn’t know it would be Jocelyn who died.
I just knew that it would be one of my friends.
Which is why I encouraged Sawyer and Kohen to stay in Caelestis.
I also wasn’t positive when exactly your mother would die.
But I knew it would be within the year. The journal said before you turned twenty-two, to be exact. ”
Pia did not give me a moment to respond before she explained her own reasoning.
“He told me about the journal during the battle, and you bet your ass that I was pissed, but now I understand why he didn’t tell us.
It’s not like none of this stuff wouldn't have happened if we knew about it. We just would have had more time to dwell on it.”
“Maybe so, but I would have at least known that my mother was going to fucking die,” I growled, then began stumbling through my words. “I—I would have written to her. Or…or visited. I would have stopped it. I—”
“No, Maeve. You wouldn’t have. Knowing that she was going to die wouldn't have changed King Hawthorne's regulations,” Kohen stated. “If Seb had told you, all it would have done was convinced you to do something reckless, which would have resulted in getting yourself caught and killed.”
“What good would knowing have done for you anyway? You also would have been more focused on trying to stop her inevitable death than you would have been about winning a war,” Sawyer added his two cents.
“A war we lost,” I corrected, my words having an intentional bite to them. “If you could even call it a war.”
I jumped to my feet, the sudden ache in my knees reminding me that I wasn’t at full health. “He lied to all of us, for gods know how long, and none of you care?” My voice cracked as the words poured from my throat.
Sebastian’s book slammed shut at last. “I didn't lie.” His boots scuffed the floor as he rose to his own feet and stormed towards me, stopping mere inches from where I stood. His scent lingered in the air as he looked down at me, his dominating presence threatening to decrease my anger with him.
“Okay fine, you just hid the stuff you didn’t want to share, which is—in my book—equally as fucked up as lying,” I sneered in his face. Despite being so pissed, his sharp jawline and perfect dark hair still sent shivers scattering down my spine.
“You wake up alive, and instead of being grateful, you choose to be argumentative and stubborn. That’s so typical,” he replied with a roll of his cerulean eyes.
I took a step back. “Woah. You have no right to be angry at me. I didn’t do anything!”
“You aren't even giving me a chance to explain,” he countered with a tick of his jaw. “Don’t I at least deserve that? Then, once you have all the information, you can decide if you hate me or not.”
“Maybe you would deserve that if I thought I could even believe anything you had to say. Plus, I didn’t lie to you for a year! I’ve never lied to you once.”
He scoffed while his eyes met the ceiling.
“Oh, you want to go there? Fine. Let’s talk about hiding things then, shall we?
Remember when you failed to tell me how harnessing your magic made you so sick that you couldn't eat? I found that out for myself when you passed out on the mat during training.”
I chewed the flesh of my lower lip. He wasn’t wrong—I did withhold that information from him, but that was different. It was about myself, not him.
“What you did was a whole other level of fucked up! You knew stuff about my life! My family! My power!”
His head tilted to the side, subsequently moving a lock of hair off his creased forehead. “And again, what good would knowing have done for you? All it would have done was added to your worries.”
“For starters, I would have tried to save my mother’s life! And it would have—”
“Alright, guys, come on.” Sawyer stood, putting himself between Sebastian and I. “This sounds like a problem between the two of you that should be handled in private. Nothing a little makeup sex can’t solve.”
“I am not having sex with him,” I scoffed out without thinking.
“Not just sex. Makeup sex. It's different,” Sawyer argued.
With a grimace, I dropped back to the sofa beside Delani.
I was thankful that Sawyer intervened. I wasn't too keen on continuing this discussion in front of my sister and friends, and I wasn’t entirely positive that I was ready for the second part of what this conversation with Sebastian would entail.
“Wait.” My eyes pinned Sebastian where he still stood. “When I woke up, you said something about my father…What were you going to say?”
“I was going to tell you that he was alive, and explain the whole Lumosia thing before you met him directly. I wanted to prepare you a little better, and I figured hearing it from me first would be nice seeing as this whole thing is a massive shock.”
“How sweet of you,” I mocked. “Did you know he was alive from the journal, too, or did you find out here like the rest of us?”
“I found out here like the rest of you,” he monotoned through a calming inhale.
I glared him down, and he glared right back. Silence ingested the room in its entirety.
“You know, Seb, you were right when you warned me that I wouldn’t like the real you. Because if this is the real you, then I fucking hate it.”
Something inside of him visibly shattered, making me regret the words the moment they left my lips. I never had been good at voicing my anger, and oftentimes was usually better off just keeping my mouth shut.
This was definitely one of those times.
“Why don’t I show you to your room?” Delani cautiously suggested with a slow pat of my upper arm. “We can catch up and have some Daddy-daughter time later. There's still more to talk about. How’s that sound?”
Fuming, my head fell upon her shoulder as I nodded.