Chapter 52
Chapter
Fifty-Two
“Are you sure about this?”
“Positive. Cut it,” I demanded.
It was only hours after the Hykah attack, and the first thing I did when Sebastian dozed off was let myself into Delani's room, waking her up and begging her to help me.
“But it’s so pretty,” she whined, holding the shears inches away from my hair.
“Delani,” I snapped, reaching a hand over my shoulder. “Cut it, or give me the damn scissors.”
“Fine,” she grumbled. “How short?”
My hair was halfway down my back, and if I wanted to be less recognizable, it would need a good chop. “To the tops of my shoulders.”
With a huff, Delani fussed with the ends of my hair, releasing a deep sigh as she made the first cut. My eyes dipped to the ground, watching the brown waves scatter across the floor. When she was done, I rose to evaluate in the mirror.
“It’s actually cuter than I expected.” I fluffed the ends, the freshly cut hair bouncing off my shoulders. “More wavy than I thought, but cute.”
She sighed and went to her washroom, emerging with a broom. “How long do you think you’ll be gone?”
The ride to Draemor took a few days, and I’d only need a few hours to find a civilian to compel into assisting me. Then killing Beaumont—well, that was the fun part—I might drag that part out.
Ideally, Sebastian wouldn't wake when I returned to our room, and I could sleep for a few hours before I’d made for the stables at the first hint of dawn.
There, I’d saddle up Honey and ride as far and as fast as possible.
By mid-morning, Sebastian would have a search party coming after me, so the further away from Lumosia I got, the better.
“May I remind you how stupid this is?” Delani griped as she began sweeping up locks of hair.
I took the broom from her, taking over. “No. What’s stupid is that we didn't do this two months ago. This Hykah attack pushed me over the edge. I can’t sit back and let another person die. I’m done.”
Her eyes resembled mine as they condensed into a glare. “You don’t have to save everyone. You can’t.”
“I know that. But for each person that has lost their life because of me, it would be nice to save one, too.”
She moved to my front, forcing a half grin. “Have I ever told you how much I admire you?”
Amidst my sweeping, I let out a small laugh. “Why would you admire me?”
“Why wouldn’t I? I mean, your entire life has been a battle, and I don’t mean that poorly.
I just mean that you've always struggled with your thoughts, but no matter what, you always come out stronger on the other end. A year ago, you were terrified of being gifted, now look at you, devising a secret plan to kill a damn king, for fuck’s sake. That's admirable as all hell.”
I choked on a real laugh this time. “Thanks, Delani.”
She stepped away then returned with a pack of gauze and some medical tape, along with extra bandages that she tucked into my rucksack. “Do you have everything you need? Want to go over the list again?”
I took a wad of gauze from her, holding it to my cheek bone while she fastened a bandage over it. “Would it make you feel better if we did?”
“Yes.”
“Fine,” I said flatly. “Hand me the list.”
She took the crumbled piece of parchment from my bag, passing it to me. She tore open the bag, ready to rummage through it.
“Daggers?” I asked.
Delani pulled two blades from the bag, then pointed to my thigh. “That one's secure?”
“Yep.” I patted the sheath over my pants. “Canteen?”
“Check.”
“Vial of toxin?”
She waved the bottle in the air. “Got it.”
“Oat bars, apples, pastries?”
“Yes, yes, and yes, gods forbid you forget to bring a muffin.”
I shot her an eye roll. “I’m going to need all the carbs I can get. Bandages you just packed,” my eyes scanned the list, “extra pair of clothes?”
“Yup.”
“Anything I’m missing?” I asked, tossing the list on the floor.
“Yeah. Your common sense.” Delani stood before me. “Are you positive you want to do this?’
“Pft. No,” I scoffed. “I don’t want to do this. I have to do this.”
She sighed through her nose, but didn't push any further. “Fine. I’ll try to hold them off for as long as I can in the morning, but you know it won’t be long before they send a search party.”
“I know.”
“And if you're not back in a week, I’m coming out there myself,” she added.
“Delani,” I took her hands in mine, “I’ll be fine. I promise.”
“Don’t make promises you can’t keep.”
“I plan on keeping this promise. I swear.” Using her hands, I pulled her into a long hug. “I love you. Make sure Sebastian doesn’t kill anyone when he finds out I’m gone.”
“I don’t make promises that I can't keep.”
I made our goodbye short and sweet, not having it in me to drag it on in the fear I might change my mind.
As planned, Sebastian was passed out when I made it back to our room. I slept for maybe three hours before the first hint of sunlight crept through our window. I laid beside him for a while, watching him sleep, just in case it was the last time.
He was going to be ripshit when he woke up.
Ever so carefully, I peered out my door. When I was sure the corridor was vacant, I stepped into the shadows, tiptoeing to the staircase.
I made a pit stop at the armory, securing a thin-bladed sword, strapping it with a sheath over my shoulder. Then I crossed the marbled floors, making for the exit. With a deep breath, my hand gripped the golden doorknob in preparation to pull.
“Where are you going?”
My inhale fastened to the walls of my chest.
Come on.
Ever so slowly, I rotated my body.
“Where are you going?” Pia slowly repeated in a tone I’d never heard from her.
She took a long stride towards me, which was saying something considering how short she was.
“And don’t give me some bullshit excuse.
I know you well enough to know that you would never just cut your hair without an ulterior motive. ”
My hands found the tops of my hip bones. “I wanted a change,” I said simply.
Her shadow danced in the torch lights that illuminated the corridor. “I said don’t give me a bullshit excuse.”
My mouth opened, then closed, and I repeated the motion until I accepted that I was at a loss for words.
Her eyes scanned my ruck sack, halting at the sword slung over my back. She swallowed, her nostrils flaring outwards. “Don’t tell me you're doing what I think you're doing.”
Without much of a fight, I submitted. “I have to, Pia. You saw what happened here. What's been happening for months. This is never going to end if I don’t stop it.”
She matched my stance, palming her own hands against her hips. “And how exactly do you plan on doing that?” When I didn’t respond, she asked, “Handing yourself over?”
“No,” I said matter of factly.
“Then you are going to try and kill him,” she deadpanned with realization. “By yourself.”
With a gulp of acceptance, I nodded and relaxed my stance. Pia looked utterly disgusted. Or maybe…betrayed? I couldn't quite pinpoint her expression.
“You will never understand. You will never know what it's like to have life after life destroyed merely because you exist. You don’t know what it’s like to have a constant target on your back, or how it feels to be the reason your loved ones are always in danger,” I tried to reason.
Her face softened, her round cheeks plumping out with her sigh. “Maeve…You can’t do this alone. Just wait a few days for the rest of Mealioria’s—”
“No.” My freshly cut hair brushed my shoulders as my head shook. “I’m going, and nothing you say right now will change that. And if you really wanted to, you could run back upstairs right now and tell Sebastian what I’m doing, but by the time you get back, I’ll be gone.”
“Stop trying to be the damn hero all the time!” she yelled, and I glanced around just to be sure no one heard her.
“I have to!” I yelled back, throwing my hands up in the air. My eyes dampened before I calmed and lowered my voice, enunciating each word. “Sawyer almost died.”
Her stare drove a knife through my heart. We both stood static for a moment, silently arguing with each other.
“Fine,” she ruptured the tension, pivoting in a half circle, though not going where I expected.
I strode after her. “What are you doing?” Fear submerged my words.
She didn't look back. “Going to the armory. I’m gonna need a sword.”
My feet picked up their pace. “For?”
“If you can’t be talked out of this, then I’m going with you. And don’t try to talk me out of it, because you won't win.”
“Pia,” I protested. “No. Absolutely not. This is not your battle.”
She spun back to face me, her orange hair wild through the turn.
Her eyebrows sunk into her eyes, and her jaw sporadically twitched, the expression almost frightening me.
“This is my battle, Maeve. It's your battle, and mine, and Sebastian’s. Kohen’s.
Sawyer’s. Your father’s. Kade’s. Delani’s.
Should I continue?” When I did not respond, she did.
“It became our battle the second you entered our lives, and you know what? I’m so fucking glad that it did.
Because I would rather be constantly wondering if today is the day I die, than not have you in my life! ”
Tears now welled in my eyes, smoldering against my cool skin. “Seriously? I’m not that special.” I chuckled through a sob.
Pia marched forward, pulling me into a death grip of a hug. “Dead serious.”
I embraced her back, and when we released each other, she said, “I’ll meet you in the stables in ten minutes. I’m going to change and pack my bag.”
One of my eyebrows arched. “What if Kohen sees you?”
She shrugged. “Kohen could sleep through the end of the world.” Then she was gone, and despite my apprehension about her attending my journey, I followed her instructions.
I made it to the stables without so much as a glance from any bystanders. There, I saddled up Honey and another mare, then plopped down to the hay, my fingers quickly working to tighten the laces of my boots before the ride.