Leah Blanco
I stood in front of the mirror, curling my hair and humming the ‘You Are My Sunshine’ lullaby.
My mother would hum it to me when I was a kid to help me fall asleep.
It was a habit that I had grown accustomed to when I was nervous, and it never failed to calm me down.
I was nervous about going on a date with Rocko.
Not because I was uncomfortable, but because dating felt like new territory.
I hadn’t been on a date in years, and the whole idea of getting to know someone new made me uneasy for more than one reason.
The dangerous part was that I was drawn to Rocko from the moment that I saw him.
He had quite a reputation in California.
Not only was he a standout athlete, recently named MVP, but he also had a reputation for being unapproachable.
He was always strictly business, always spoken of, but rarely seen.
He showed up, played ball, and stayed out of the mix.
I’ve never had the pleasure of meeting him, although I had planned every event for the team for the last four years because he never showed.
From what I heard, he was disciplined and low-key.
It’s wild how fate works. Because I wasn’t supposed to be a part of the burlesque show.
Normally, I plan the events and enjoy them the same way the public does.
But just a few hours before the Museum of the Forbidden was supposed to open, one of my girls pulled out.
Instead of feeling overwhelmed, I put on my costume, wrote a quick backstory, and sat in her box.
All night, I sat there with my legs idly swinging, staring into space, and creeping everyone out.
That was, until the curtain revealed Rocko.
From the moment that I laid eyes on his six-foot-three toned frame in that God-awful purple Joker costume, I felt like I was being hypnotized.
He stood at the glass with dark eyes, a set jaw, and a permanent scowl that confirmed that he was everything that they claimed him to be.
When our stares collided, I knew that he felt it too.
It was almost as if time stood still as we stood there, eyes locked on each other until the curtain closed.
I knew then that I had to have him. Even if it meant finding out he would be at Tricks it sounded like you needed to vent. Let’s talk about that instead.” I offered, hoping to redirect her back to something that didn’t involve badgering me.
“Let’s not. Did you fuck him?” She asked through slits in her eyes, unfazed by my frustration.
“No, I didn’t.”
“You sure?”
“Yes, Daya, this is the first time that we’re seeing each other since the event,” I answered as I walked past her, went to the wall where my perfume shelves were, picked up my favorite scent, and sprayed it lightly over my body.
Beside it sat the travel-sized tube, and I dropped it in my purse to spray right before I walked into the restaurant.
Daya thought she was slick, but I saw right through her.
She wasn’t asking me if I had sex with Rocko because she thought I was loose; she was asking because she wanted to gauge how seriously I felt about him.
My sister knew better than anyone that if I chose to give my goodies away, I was all in.
And being “all in” posed a problem for everyone involved.
For a couple of beats, the room was completely silent.
She may have been quiet, but I knew she was watching me like a hawk. When I turned around, it confirmed my suspicion.
“Daya, how about being happy that I’m finding an interest in dating again instead of being skeptical?
I have got this under control, trust me.
” I smiled, patted her head, and kissed her cheek like a parent would on their kid's first day of school. It was always my way of reminding her that no matter how much she fussed, I’d always be the older sibling.
She didn’t debate with me. In fact, she didn’t say anything else. She just followed me down the stairs and stood at the bottom, watching as I walked out the door and closed it behind me.
She worried way too much. This was the first time in a long time I finally felt I had my life under control, and I wasn’t going to let Negative Nancy make me doubt years of hard work and reflection.
Outside, the black truck Rocko had sent for me waited.
“Good evening, Miss Blanco.” The man greeted me and extended his hand to help me step up into the truck.
“Hello, and thank you,” I said as I slid into the back seat.
On the seat sat a bouquet and a bucket of ice, with a wine bottle resting on it.
I picked up the roses, closed my eyes, and smelled them. This is definitely the welcome that I deserved.
The truck was barely outside of the gate and down the road when my phone buzzed in my lap, and I picked it up.
Other Half: Be safe, sister. Please, take things slow. Get to know him.
I sighed and then dropped it back in my lap without responding. She couldn’t help herself. I'd hoped she was still asleep from her night shift while I got ready so that I could slip out without this conversation, but luck wasn’t on my side.
My phone buzzed again, and I snatched it up quickly. I was ready to curse her out if it had been another warning, but my anger immediately calmed when I saw it was Rocko telling me he had arrived at the restaurant.
I smiled as I looked at the thread. Then I thanked him for the roses and told him that we were still about fifteen minutes away.
“So, this is what dating feels like?” I mumbled to myself before I pressed ‘send’ on my response.
I put my phone down again and stared out the window. The feeling brewing in the pit of my stomach was something I couldn’t ignore, even if I tried.
“You see men every second of the day that try to talk to you. You haven’t entertained a man since…”
Daya’s words echoed through my head with every turn of the tire, bringing us closer to our destination.
No matter how much she annoyed me with her overbearing nature, I knew she knew me almost better than I knew myself, and that her concern came from love and nothing else.
She’s seen me at one of the lowest points of my life, and as a sister, I know that had to be just as hard to watch as it was for me to go through.
I just hated that she had to bring it up tonight.
But I get it.
Love hadn’t always been kind to me. As a result, I wound up in a place I never thought I would be. I haven’t dated or entertained a man in the last five years. I guess she fears that if this goes south, I’ll wind back up in a place that I fought so hard to escape.
Even if I didn’t want to admit it, I knew that she was right.
A part of me felt the same. I’ve worked closely and have been accosted by some of the most handsome entrepreneurs, rappers, and athletes.
But no one could awaken the part of me that had felt dead inside.
Yet Rocko made me feel something, although we were separated by 6-inch bulletproof plexiglass.