Chapter 4 #2
He hissed out a laugh. “You know how to throw up a hasty defense when you fear having your mind invaded, though your skill in that arena leaves much to be desired.”
“It worked on you,” I said smugly, thinking back to when he’d questioned me in Imogen’s apartment.
“If I’d truly wanted to get inside your head that night,” he said, leaning in so close that his breath ruffled my hair, “it would have been only too easy.”
I swallowed.
“Some fae can reach into your mind and pluck out the information they seek. Demons, on the other hand . . .” His gaze turned predatory.
“The most skilled among us can enter completely undetected and bend your mind to our will. We can insert or remove memories. Warp your emotions. Dismantle the very essence of who you are, if we wish.”
Kaden gave me a pointed look, and I fought back a shudder as I remembered the demon who’d attacked me at Silas’s. I could still feel those oily tendrils wrapping around my mind. He’d ransacked my very being — devouring everything I was. But I refused to appear rattled.
“I will not be training with you ,” I snarled. “I have no need to train, because I will not help you. You are the reason your kingdom is dying. I will not put the Taker of Souls on the throne of Anvalyn — even if it means something worse rules over Dorthus.”
A long moment passed in silence as we stared at one another. I could feel the steady pulse of Kaden’s dark power humming against my skin, but I refused to back down.
Then I felt it. A tendril of shadow caressing the outer edges of my mind — a shadow that carried a whiff of leather and night.
I hurriedly snapped up an imaginary wall around my mind, building it four feet thick and a hundred feet tall.
I braced myself for Kaden’s attack as a thick black fog coalesced around me, throwing my mind into complete darkness. I gritted my teeth, holding strong as I pictured my mental walls. Stone and steel. Strong. Impenetrable.
But then I felt that pulse of power, and the walls around me shook. Then crumbled.
All at once, Kaden was everywhere, those shadows enveloping every thought, every feeling. The immovable pillars of who I was were suddenly choked by black mist.
Slowly, the scent of stale cigarette smoke and human waste pervaded my senses. I was back in Silas’s basement, and Kaden was inside my memory.
As I stared up into the face that haunted my dreams, I saw it was Kaden’s face superimposed over my old master’s as Silas drove me against the hard brick wall.
Blood pounded in my ears. I could feel my strength failing me, feel the roughness of the brick cutting into my back. But I’d anticipated Silas’s — Kaden’s — next move and drove my dagger up through his sternum into his cold, black heart.
Hot blood gushed over my hand and poured down the sleeve of my jacket.
Then the gloomy basement vanished, and all I felt was searing pain.
My vision was partially obscured by tears, but I recognized the filthy yellow tile from the dingy bathroom in the group foster home where I’d stayed as a kid.
Dirty, sweaty hands clawed at my throat, and my lungs constricted with terror. The boy on top of me was part ogre, and his strength was immense.
Tears mixed with the blood from my broken nose, and I tasted salt and iron. But when I looked up into the half-ogre’s small, beady eyes, I saw Kaden staring back at me.
No .
The bathroom vanished, and I was in Silas’s basement again, crouched in front of that infernal brick wall.
Cold air prickled over the bare skin of my back, and my whole body tensed a second before I felt the slice of a blade through my flesh.
My insides shook with the effort of containing my scream as Silas carved into me. But I already knew that if I turned around, I’d see Kaden holding the knife.
I focused all my energy on ripping myself from the memory. If I could just escape the horrors of my past, I could rebuild my walls.
But my mind was not my own, and my willpower felt sticky. Sluggish. Kaden’s shadows swirled around me, dragging me to the next memory.
I tried to resist, but it was as useless as trying to resist the current of a raging river. I couldn’t think. Couldn’t act. It was as though my will was draining out of me faster than I could summon it.
And then, something inside me snapped, and it was as though the threads tying me to those memories simply detached .
I was spinning — free-falling through shadow and mist. Untethered and adrift.
A shrill scream filled my ears, and I realized it belonged to me.
At least, it belonged to the body that had once housed those memories. I had nothing. I belonged to nothing, and nothing belonged to me.
All at once, Kaden’s shadows cleared, revealing the crumbled wreckage of my mental walls. Warm golden light streamed in through my closed eyelids, and my knees ached horribly.
Slowly, I peeled my eyes open, squinting in the glow of the setting sun.
I was crouched on the hard flagstone floor of the dining room, the skirts of my fine gown splayed around me. I’d curled myself into a ball as if bracing for a blow, and my skin was covered in a sheen of cold sweat.
Gasping, I straightened and rifled through my thoughts, checking to see that they were still intact.
I was me again. At least, I felt like me .
My old tormentors were gone, but the memories were still there, as was the residue of my terror and pain. It mixed with a fresh surge of fury that Kaden had invaded my mind.
The demon prince just stood there, looking down at me with a cold expression.
I hated that he’d gone into my memories — hated that he’d seen me at my worst. Weak, scared, and alone.
“Any fight is won or lost in the mind first, little huntress. Remember that. When we go to Dorthus, any one of the demons we encounter could access your mind and destroy any hope we have of defeating my father.”
His lip curled in disdain, but I couldn’t summon the energy to speak.
“As long as your mind remains unguarded, you are a liability.”