Chapter 14 #2
‘It’s a touch on your skin that’s as light as a breath but can still make you shiver inside.
It’s a taste of something and, because you’re eating it with your lover, it suddenly becomes more delicious than it has the right to be.
It’s giving something a significance that will stay with you for the rest of your life.
One of those memories that can be a light in dark times, like if you feel unbearably lonely or you’ve lost something so precious that the grief makes you want to die.
But these memories have the real magic. Because of the love. The romance.’
Tilly could sense she wasn’t explaining it well enough.
‘If a child picks a flower and offers it as a treasure to her mother – that’s pure love.
If a man chooses a flower with care and offers it to his copine – that’s love but it’s also romantic.
Both moments will be remembered but the love between a mother and child will always be there.
It’s unconditional. The love between the man and the woman is something that comes out of nowhere – like magic and it has to be equal enough on both sides.
And it needs to be cherished. It needs the food of romance and, if you truly love someone and they love you back, it’s never going to be a performance.
Or just the icing. It doesn’t need to be a grand gesture.
It can just be… there. A way of saying je t’aime – I love you – without any words at all. A tiny gift. A touch. Just a look…’
Angus was staring at her as if she had just beamed in from another planet. She needed to stop ranting, Tilly thought, but now that the words were pouring out, she couldn’t stop them.
‘You can remember how it felt when you were just sitting with your lover watching that beautiful sunset and the way he looked at you and then touched your face with his fingers – so softly, like a feather – until he reached your lips…’
Oh, help… she was thinking of Angus doing exactly that, wasn’t she?
When they were standing in the olive grove cottage.
Before they made love for the first time.
Because it had been making love – for her, at least. She wasn’t just on the edge of falling in love with Angus McLeod.
It had already happened and she knew that beyond any shadow of doubt because she could feel the magic with just the flash of a memory she barely acknowledged.
One that hadn’t interrupted the flow of her words for more than a heartbeat.
‘…and then the look in his eyes changed and they looked like pools that were so deep you could fall into them and sink forever and, when his lips touched yours that was exactly what you wanted to do. Fall. Forever.’
Tilly dragged in a new breath. The words were finally running out. Had she made any sense at all or just made herself sound like more of a fool for having such a belief in something Angus had no time for?
‘That’s how romance can make a moment magical.
Just a touch. A look. A kiss, a few words or a written note, peut-être.
’ Her voice had dropped to no more than a whisper.
‘And even the memory of it can make you feel that moment again. That tiny shiver. That glow. It’s about the love.
’ She put her hand on her heart. ‘It comes from in here and, even if it looks like a performance to others – that slow dance or that kiss in the light of the sunset – it can still be truly romantic if it’s real. ’
* * *
Angus was still staring at Tilly, totally mesmerised.
He had heard every word she’d said but he’d also felt them and they’d had a power that made him want to believe.
He wanted memories like that. He’d been perfectly well aware that something was missing from his life and he’d intended to rectify that by getting married and having someone to share it. By having children. By having a dog in the family, for God’s sake.
But what if what was really missing from his life was none of those things but the ability to feel the kind of love that made romance a gift to be both given and received?
Maybe romance was the evidence of being capable of feeling that kind of love. Or to tell if someone felt that way about you. Tilly believed that the lack of it had destroyed her parents’ marriage. She wouldn’t consider marrying a man who didn’t share that belief.
Angus was being pulled even more firmly towards that dangerous space where you could find that you’d handed your heart to somebody who didn’t want it and the pieces you got back were never going to fit properly together again.
But Tilly had earned his admiration and his trust over the last few days. She was clearly a passionate believer and that made the space she’d inhabited all her life seem a lot more inviting than watching his father’s romantic disasters ever had.
A space to at least visit, even if it only confirmed that he didn’t want to live there?
Tilly still had her hand on her chest, over her heart. Angus put his hand over hers, holding her gaze for as long as possible as he very slowly dipped his head until he was close enough to kiss her.
He had the ridiculous notion that the winged man might be watching them, but he also had the feeling that this moment was going to be one of those memories that Tilly had been talking about. The kind he would have forever.
Because, the instant his lips touched Tilly’s, it was like that moment at the lake when everything – the gorgeous countryside, the delicious picnic, the sunshine and, of course, the kiss – had created an alchemy that made him feel like he was more alive than he’d ever felt before.
This was more than that, even. This time he thought he could feel a hint of that sparkle Tilly had been talking about.
Or was that just wishful thinking because he wanted to feel that sparkle. To believe in that magic…