Chapter 33 #2
“I’m just telling you what I feel.” Isla’s eyes slid to the artwork of the unnamed woman.
“I’m still dreaming of her, and it’s always the same.
There’s a storm, there’s war, she calls me Warrior Heart, and there’s that music.
” The haunting melody and the violin that nagged at her.
Had she heard it anywhere before? “She always talks about ‘trying harder’ and ‘stopping him’ and it’s ‘only been us.’ And then she presses a blade, this blade,” Isla shivered as she stared at the weapon in her hand, swearing it hummed its own melody now, “against my throat, my heart, and says, ‘If you fail, then they all fall.’”
Even repeating it, it didn’t make much sense.
“Who’s they?”
Isla scoffed. “Who’s falling? What’s failing?
She isn’t into specifics. Never has been.
” She pulled out a chair at the table and slumped into it, placing the dagger on the slab and plucking up a piece of the diadem.
“I don’t know what to make of it. Any of it.
Is she… me in a past life or something? It sounds ridiculous, but anything could be possible at this point, and I will take any answer just to knock this problem off our list.”
“Well, do you believe in reincarnation?”
“Not really.”
In her mind, they were all crafted uniquely by the Goddess; then Fate decided who their mates were and wove them together before ripping them apart.
What was left behind? The smallest fragment of their other half within them, so their souls could find each other again through life.
She was no one but herself—she felt and fully believed that.
She eyed Aneurin’s journal a few feet away, gently placing the diadem back onto the table. “But history repeating itself, I might believe in that. Kai has his own theory that Deimos may be heading towards the same fate that Phobos was dealt and that we—we’re supposed to stop it.”
Jonah’s features paled. “I figured everything was connected, but I was hoping it wouldn’t be in that way.”
Isla hummed in agreement. “It’s all been so strange with the Wilds lately, and everything sounds so eerily similar to what you said Aneurin went through against the Imperial Alpha back then.”
“I wish Kai would catch whoever killed his family so we could get answers from them. Though I’m sure everyone will want their head on a spike immediately.”
Isla’s stomach hollowed, and the rich brew suddenly tasted like ash. The image that flashed through her mind made bile crawl up her throat. Others learning the truth, her mother in chains and hauled before a bloodthirsty crowd as an alpha killer.
Her features strained to remain impassive while Jonah continued, “I mean, the killer gave us all of this: the journal, diadem, dagger, and markers, and they have communicated with us through these symbols. They could probably answer all of this. They’re clearly lingering around Deimos.
Maybe you and Kai should talk about putting more resources into tracking them down? ”
Isla’s hands dropped to her lap, her fingernails gouging so deeply into her palms she felt the wetness of her blood. “I don’t think they’ll be much help.”
It was such an illogical claim that Jonah’s brows drew together, and he observed her with concern. “Why not?”
“Have you ever heard of something called the dark moon?”
Jonah took a large gulp from his mug, finally opting to sit. His analyzing eyes seemed to bore holes into her. “Never in my life.”
This would be a pretty good distraction, then.
Isla breathed, relaxing her hands as she began to explain everything Adrien had told them about the moon and its effects.
Jonah’s hand moved so fast as he wrote that she was surprised smoke hadn’t flown off the page.
She kept Cassius wanting Kai dead vague enough that she didn’t need to mention Kai’s power or anything regarding Raana.
When she’d finished, Jonah remained silent. For five seconds, ten, twenty—
“You know how my face sometimes makes you nervous?” Isla traced anxious circles along the table’s surface. “You being quiet makes me nervous.”
Jonah still didn’t speak, though; he only took a seat and flipped through Aneurin’s journal, riddled with folded pieces of paper containing the shopkeeper’s own notes.
“What’s bothering you?” Isla asked.
“All of it.”
Isla didn’t have it in her to laugh. “What’s bothering you most?”
“That something like this exists and that the Imperial Alpha is the only one who knows about it.”
“Well, now we do.”
“But we’re likely missing the part that can actually be weaponized.”
Isla pursed her lips. “Most likely.”
Jonah kept flipping, grumbling that he needed a better tabbing system. “Do you know how rare auroras are in Deimos?”
Isla lifted her brows. “Extremely?”
“It’s never happened before. At least, not in any of the written records I’ve combed through these past few days—here.
” Finally, he reached what he’d been looking for and cursed in relief.
His finger pressed down on the page riddled with ink.
“My translation isn’t great, but Aneurin talks about seeing skylights with Saoirse and calling it a ‘Goddess’s beckon. ’ I wondered if it was the same.”
Isla had heard and seen in the papers that some had called the aurora a blessing—a sign that her and Kai’s reign was about to be something special and Goddess-blessed.
“Who’s Saoirse?” She hadn’t realized she’d reached towards the dagger again until she felt the dull buzz of it along her fingers.
“Aneurin’s mate. The last Luna of Phobos.”
Isla slowly pulled her hand back. “Does he talk about her anywhere else?”
“Not really,” Jonah said. “You would think he would—I think they were fated, too—but he mainly writes about rising to power. A lot of political meanderings, scheming, and nonsense. Then some of his own personal accounts.”
Isla wrapped her chilling hands around her mug’s warm surface. “What kind of personal accounts?”
“Nothing interesting. How he’d been feeling day to day. A lot about headaches he’d been having, but didn’t want to tell anyone about it, so they wouldn’t see him as faltering.”
Isla nearly jumped from her seat. “What kind of headaches?”
“Bad ones?” Jonah offered, heeding her eagerness. “I could translate something like pressure. There could be more about them in his other journals. I’m sure there are many more. We barely scratched the surface of any war here, just some scheming.”
Isla gnawed on her lip. “Where do you think those are?”
“My best guess would be the Wilds if anything. The Pack Hall, if it’s still standing after the decimation.”
Isla found her eyes tracing the swirls of creamy foam through the darkness eddying within her mug. Her mind reeled back to last night. “Would Alpha Kyran have kept journals like this?”
Would he have written about Kai, about why he wanted to protect him specifically?
Jonah cocked his head. “I could imagine. Kai hasn’t seen them?”
She highly doubted Kai had gone through his father’s things. “He hasn’t mentioned them.”
“Oh, the secrets those must hold.” Jonah leaned back in his seat, gnawing on his pen, mulling something over.
“For diaries like this, I think it’s customary for them to be locked away where only other alphas can get to them.
I doubt betas are told, and I wonder about lunas.
Alpha Kyran may have only given the location to Jaden. ”
“That’s… tragic.” It was the only word Isla could find to describe any of this. “So, Kai would never know where to find them?”
Jonah frowned. “He wasn’t Alpha Kyran’s heir.”
Isla huffed. “Someone must know. They can’t just be lost forever.” The corner of Jonah’s lips ticked up slightly. “Don’t look so giddy about it.”
A full smirk graced the shopkeeper’s mouth as he put his hands behind his head. “Another mystery to solve,” he mused. “Hopefully, this one doesn’t try to kill us.”
Isla would’ve been content never to think again.
By the time she left The Bookshoppe, her mind was spinning, so filled with thoughts that she was surprised they didn’t spill out of her ears as she ascended the hills back to the Pack Hall.
She’d made it nearly halfway home when the coughing started.
Her hand went to her chest, clawing at it as if she could free her lungs.
She hadn’t realized it was happening before it was too late. Her body turned cold, her fingers trembled, and the overwhelm wrapped so tightly around her throat that she sputtered. Panic hit her like a blow to the head.
Isla ducked into the nearby woods and found refuge against a tree, sinking to the leaf-littered floor. She dragged her knees up to her chest as she breathed, breathed, breathed.
The forest around her was so tranquil, the wildlife at peace and trilling their melodies. Covering her mouth, she leaned her head back against the bark, catching glimpses of the sky through the trees’ canopies.
This felt different than any other time she’d panicked or cried these past few days. She couldn’t pinpoint what had set her off.
It was too much. All of this was far too much. And it didn’t feel like there was any way out of it. No end. Never any sense of peace.
An abyss opened wide beneath her, threatening to drag her down and swallow her whole. That monster watched and waited, smarter than she was.
“Stop. You’re fine. Get a hold of yourself.” Her words fell on deaf ears, and her attempt at a smile failed.
A warrior. A queen… a joke. A liar.
She felt wetness at the corner of her eye and swiped it away, her shoulders shaking as she brought her forehead to her knees and sobbed through her teeth. A weight pressed down, harder and harder, preparing to crush her beneath it.
If you fail, they all fall.
She’d already failed in so many ways, failed so many people.
So much death.
Isla’s thoughts eddied to an unrelenting cold, blanketing her bones and chilling her breath. She embraced it, sank into it, letting it carry her away.
Something beneath her skin writhed, clawing at her insides, through her chest, and up her throat. Her wolf?
Isla cried out, her back arching as a flash of pain shook her to her foundations. And then everything was dark and raw and frigid and… powerful.
She slumped, feeling like something had been ripped from her, and through her blurred, blinking eyes, she could’ve sworn that shadows of the forest shifted around her.
Glowing violet eyes stared at her through the dark.
The birds ceased their singing. The leaves around her had scattered.
Isla gulped down air, her teeth chattering and body shaking so violently she may have been vibrating.
Whatever had stirred settled now, but Isla still felt charged… yet, somehow, exhausted.
She scanned the forest again. There was nothing there.
The world swayed.
A possibility reared in her head, but she shut it down; she wouldn’t accept it.
She dug the heels of her palms into her eyes, shaking her head, a tired whimper slipping from her lips. Nothing. It had to be nothing.
She couldn’t handle much else.