Chapter Twenty-Three
As Nick stood at the airport security gate with Claire, he tried to remember how they’d spent the last week, but his head was muddled.
It had gone so quickly, too quickly. Now, as he double-checked his travel information, he furiously tried to recall some of the details.
There had been meetings at Inspiration and a dinner with the family.
His brothers had offered to accompany him to the airport, but he’d declined, wanting to spend those moments with Claire.
He knew she was struggling, and he didn’t blame her. There was no sense in laying blame. He’d told her from the start that he wouldn’t push her, and he intended to keep his promise.
Asking her to join him in his travels had been a huge request. He wasn’t trying to take her away from her world or interfere with her work.
He knew she cared for the cats and her volunteers.
If, at the end of the day, she decided she still wanted to run the sanctuary while working on her photography, so be it. He’d support her and help her.
But he suspected her devotion to Haven ran a lot deeper than her love of animals.
It represented Arthur.
Deep down, he understood why she didn’t just drop everything and run away with him.
At the same time, he really wanted her to just drop everything and run away with him.
However, he knew leaps of faith terrified her. She’d already taken one in telling him she loved him.
But this next one was even bigger. The chasm stretched between them, and as much as he yearned to cover the distance for her, he couldn’t.
In the end, she was the one who needed to jump.
She checked the time on the departures board again. Her gaze had been glued to the digital display since they got there. She was counting down the minutes just as much as he was.
Tension rode his body, stiffening his shoulders and his back. He hadn’t been sleeping well at all, despite spending every night in bed with Claire.
What did you expect, buddy? You knew this was how it would end.
He just hadn’t realized it would feel like cutting off one of his limbs.
Of course, they hadn’t actually called an end to anything. He and Claire had promised they would talk every day, and that they would make plans for a visit soon. They were treating this as a long-distance relationship. For all Nick knew, this might work. He knew couples who managed at a distance.
Although he didn’t want to simply ‘manage’. He wanted them to thrive.
He couldn’t help feeling as if a part of him had already withered.
When she checked the clock again, he did too. It was time.
She was gnawing on the inside of her cheek, holding in tears. God, he hated her tears.
“Hey,” he said. “Come here.”
She buried her nose in his chest as he wrapped her in a bear hug.
After breathing in the scent of her fruity shampoo, he cupped her cheek. “It’s going to be okay.” He forced a smile. “We can do this.”
“Yeah.”
“I love you.”
“I love you too.”
His heart already aching from the loss, Nick kissed her. He put everything into that kiss. His need for a life with her, his desire for her happiness and all the pain he would endure until he could touch her again.
When she trembled, he put his strength into the caress. When a tear slipped from her eye, he kissed it away. And when her hands shook, he held them until the tremors subsided.
He needed to be strong for her, for them.
He could fall apart later.