Chapter 14 Tamsyn #3
“Accept me as yours, Tamsyn, and I will be yours. We will belong to each other.” His voice was its own form of magic, subtle and hypnotic. One of his hands claimed mine again, rubbing the X, massaging it, easing the ache there with the pressure of his touch. “Be with me and this will fade.”
Would it, though?
I looked down to where his fingers were working so diligently upon my palm, and I felt a confusing mix of relief and sorrow as his touch eased the echo of Fell into submission.
Relief and sorrow. Like oil and water. Two things that should not exist together, but there they were, all jumbled into a messy, tangled knot inside me.
Did I want to lose Fell completely?
I stared down at my hand. Totally? Did I want to rid myself of his echo? His ghost? The loss would be permanent then. Final in a way all dead things are.
Suddenly, the skin of my palm jumped and sparked and sizzled, alive and reacting as never before, almost as though the X was fighting against Vetr’s touch, repelling it, driving him back.
And it did just that.
Vetr released me and recoiled as though stung, looking down at my palm that glowed fire-bright in the gloom.
“That’s him,” I choked out.
Vetr looked back and forth between my face and the blazing mark, clearly unsettled. “He’s gone.” His voice was harder now than before, commanding, and I wasn’t so certain if he was addressing me or himself. “You’re going to have to stop tormenting yourself. You can’t continue like this.”
I digested that, wishing it was as simple as choosing not to feel this way, wishing I could will away the dreams, the memories, the longings, will away the incessant buzz in my hand.
I took a breath, suddenly needing more air in this space, which seemed to shrink and close in around me. I stared at him, certain I had never seen him before, this man—dragon—who wanted me for his mate.
I’ve been waiting to taste this mouth for a long time, Little Flame.
“How long?” I asked abruptly. “How long have you wanted to kiss me?”
He looked away. I thought he would not answer me, and then he looked back, eyes glinting, burning ice. “Do you remember the first time you were knocked down in the arena?”
I winced. It had been several weeks after I lost Fell, and I’d dragged myself to the training arena, deciding it was time to pick up my life again, changed as it was.
“I had been fighting Bodin.” The youngest in the pride (excluding little Mirja) at thirteen, and he had still wiped the floor with me.
“He got the best of you.”
“That is putting it mildly.”
“He knocked you down over and over.”
“With such ease. I barely made it to my feet before I was on my back again. I was so embarrassed.”
“You were magnificent,” he countered with utter sincerity.
My chest tightened at the compliment, and I said breathlessly, “That is not how I would describe myself.”
“Every time he knocked you down, you climbed back to your feet. You wouldn’t stop … and I …” His voice faded, his gaze fixing on my mouth. “I couldn’t take my eyes off you.”
He didn’t need to say the rest. That was when he thought of tasting my mouth.
I moistened my lips. “I’m not ready, Vetr. You shouldn’t wait for me. There are others more worth your time. Estrid. Gudru,” I hastily offered … as though they were mine to give to him.
His lip curled slightly, an almost smile. “Are you trying to tell me who I should want?”
I gulped. Want. There was that word again. “It would be less complicated if you chose one of them.”
“I want you, Tamsyn. I’ve waited this long for you. I can be patient and wait longer. I don’t mind complicated. Something tells me you’re worth the wait.”
I shivered even though the last thing I felt was cold. Right now, with his eyes on me, his words vibrating through me, I was burning up inside.
He was always intense when it came to training and the defense and protection of the pride.
While others spent their free time at games or flirting, he did not.
He was too serious for that. Too serious for frivolity.
He was constantly working on a task, or with his head bent, strategizing with one of his skeppars, or overseeing a training exercise, planning the next rekon.
I imagined he was always this way, even as a boy … a feral child left on his own wouldn’t have had time for leisure. Not then. Not now.
I opened my mouth to tell him that I had no interest in romance, in bonding. With him or anyone. Learning to survive in this new world was enough.
Except he turned away in that moment, striding from me in his bold, prowling gait, the eternal hunter.
At the threshold of my den, he stopped and looked over his shoulder at me.
“You’re going to have to move on someday. The pride is your family now whether you realize it or not … and your family needs you.” He paused and cleared his throat as though something was stuck there, getting in the way of his voice. “I need you.”
He pushed the flap aside and vanished, leaving me alone with my wildly pulsing hand and my wilder thoughts.
I would not think of it, I vowed. Not his words or his lips or his touch.
I would forget all about this night and him.