Chapter 10 #2
‘I am sure Ciaran did want your company, my dear. I know him well enough to know he would not spend an evening with you if he didn’t enjoy being with you. He would have bought a big box of chocolates or a bottle of perfume to repay you.’
‘I . . . I think I’ll go to bed now. Would you like me to make you a hot drink first?’
‘No, thanks, my dear. I’m ready for my bed too. I do hope you sleep well.’
* * *
The following day, Ciaran arrived at midday for his dinner, which had become a daily occurrence unless he was working in one of the more distant fields, when he carried a flask and sandwiches to save time travelling home with the tractor.
As soon as she heard the pickup, Amy tapped on the window and beckoned him into her sitting room so he kicked off his boots and went in at the front door.
‘What did you say to upset Roxie yesterday evening?’ Amy asked in a low voice.
‘And a good day to you too, Mum.’ Ciaran mocked his mother irritably.
‘Roxie is not someone who resorts to tears, but I am sure she had a struggle to hold them back when she came home last night.’
‘I thought she had enjoyed the evening as much as I did.’ His colour heightened as he remembered their goodnight kiss. He frowned. He really wasn’t sure what he had said or done to spoil things.
‘Ciaran, I know Roxanne Carr is different to the giggly girls you and Don used to take out. She is more mature, capable and competent at everything I have seen her undertake so far, but you have to remember she has had a lot of upsets in recent times, losing her father so suddenly, leaving the only home and work she had ever known. I know how much she appreciates the emails from her friends, especially news and photographs from the girl who has the twins, her best friend, Lucy, but she never hears anything from her brother or his new wife. That is bound to hurt.’
‘I had no intention of hurting her!’ Ciaran said crossly.
‘Then what did you say?’
‘I don’t know, damn it! Everything was fine until she got out of the car. Oh, I said I wanted to repay her for doing the milking for me . . .’ He frowned. ‘She said goodnight and slammed the door.’
‘Don’t you see?’ His mother shook her head. ‘She wanted you to take her because you enjoy her company, not to repay her for anything.’
‘I do enjoy her company!’ Ciaran said. ‘I’m never sure if she enjoys mine, though.’
‘Of course she enjoys your company or she wouldn’t have gone with you.
Why shouldn’t she enjoy your company? You’re an eligible young man and a hard worker.
I expect I’m prejudiced, but you’re quite handsome when you’re scrubbed up.
You can be charming, too, when it suits — in fact, you have a pleasant manner when you don’t lose your temper. ’
‘You’re definitely prejudiced,’ Ciaran said drily. ‘Now, I’m hungry and ready for some dinner.’
‘Maybe you are, but let me tell you this, son. If I could have had a girl tailor-made to be your wife, I couldn’t have chosen one more suited than Roxanne. She even shares your interest and knowledge of breeding cattle. Amanda never showed any interest in your work.’
‘Mum, I was genuinely sad when Amanda was killed. We were good friends, but I know we would never have got as far as marriage, even if we had got round to getting engaged to please you when you were so keen to get Dad moved out of the farm.’
‘I see . . . One more thing though, Ciaran. You are the only child I have so it’s important to me that I like the girl you marry, although I would always try not to interfere if I did disapprove.
I think I have got to know Roxie very well in the time she has been here and she is almost like a daughter.
’ For a moment her face clouded, remembering the two small daughters of her own, now buried in the churchyard.
‘Mother, we all know how you feel, but I can’t make a girl love me to suit you, however much I might want her.’ Ciaran sighed. ‘Let’s have our dinner now.’
* * *
It was impossible for Roxie to stay aloof with Ciaran, and deep down she felt they were good friends.
If only she was not so unsure of herself.
They were easy in each other’s company. She enjoyed their witty exchanges and his teasing, but deep down she knew she wanted more.
Her heart always beat faster whenever he was near, and especially when he kissed her.
* * *
Roxie got a shock when she read the latest email from Lucy. Usually, she was full of the twins’ latest achievements and news of mutual friends. This email concerned only Tommy and Gilda.
I expect Tommy will have telephoned to tell you they had a baby son on the tenth of February, ‘supposedly’ two months premature, according to Gilda, but he must be a decent weight when they have already been discharged from hospital. They are staying with her parents.
Steve says people are speculating about things.
I expect he means because Tommy only returned home from Australia in July.
Gilda and her family had moved down here from Glasgow while he was away, so he had never met her until he returned home.
Steve thinks they met for the first time when his old gang took him to the club that had opened during his absence.
My cousin, Celia, thinks there may be other reasons for speculation, but she didn’t say what.
It is more than her job is worth to gossip.
There was a little more general news and the usual good wishes.
‘You look pale,’ Amy said when she came into the kitchen and saw Roxie putting her phone into her trouser pocket.
‘I have had an email from Lucy, my friend.’
‘She usually cheers you up with news of your little god-daughters. I hope they are both well?’
‘Yes. She thought I would have heard from Tommy, my brother. He and Gilda have got a baby boy. Gilda says he is two months premature, but they have already left the hospital. Why hasn’t Tommy let me know?
I can never get him on his mobile and he never gets in touch.
We were always the best of friends. He sent me lots of emails when he was abroad and phoned a couple of times.
He had not been home long when he met Gilda.
Nothing seems to have been the same since.
My father urged him to wait a while before getting married — in fact they quarrelled over it. ’
‘I see. I supposed he had known his wife before he went away and . . .’
‘No, he only met Gilda after he came home from Australia. That’s what troubled my father. He was so concerned that he changed his will just before their wedding.’
‘Would you like to take a few days’ holiday and go to visit them, Roxie? I could stay with Ciaran until you return.’
‘I think if they had wanted me to know, they would have sent word. Anyway, Gilda and the baby are staying with her parents.’
‘I have knitted one small jacket for Jenny’s baby. Would you like to send it to them with a card? Maybe it will let them know you wish them well?’
‘It’s very kind of you. Will you let me buy it from you?’
‘Of course not, dear. Or if you thought it wouldn’t be your gift if you didn’t pay, you can buy me the wool to make another for Jenny’s baby. I do enjoy the knitting. It helps me pass the time while I am not so active.’
‘Yes, I will do that. I will drive into Thornielee and buy a card. I can replace the wool at the shop where we went before.’
Roxie bought some pretty blue paper and wrapped up the lovely little garment with a baby card.
Amy never asked if she had received a thank-you letter from Tommy or Gilda. She would probably have seen a letter if one had arrived, and she knew Roxie would have told her if they had phoned to acknowledge her gift, but there was nothing.
* * *
It was the beginning of May before Ciaran asked Roxie if she would like to go with him to the theatre again.
‘It’s their version of The Sound of Music. It will not be anything like the film, of course, but I thought you might enjoy the music. Daniel will be in it again.’
‘I would love to go, if you’re sure you want my company?’
‘Oh, Roxie, of course I want your company!’
Surely she must realise how much I miss her if I don’t see her for a day? he thought with a frown. Even half a day and he was looking for an excuse. He missed her smile. He missed her teasing. Oh, God, she had really got under his skin. He grasped her shoulders and turned her to look at him.
‘I wouldn’t ask you if I didn’t enjoy your company, Roxie. I thought you must know that. Or would you be fishing for compliments?’ he asked with a hesitant smile.
It was indeed another lovely evening with just the two of them. The performance was excellent, including the children’s singing. Both Roxie and Ciaran sang with enthusiasm when the audience was invited to join in.
‘I don’t need fish and chips this time,’ Ciaran said on the way home. ‘But I will stop for some if you’re peckish.’
‘No, thanks. I’m not hungry. We have had a lovely evening without the chips.’
‘I’m glad you enjoyed it. They must put in a lot of work rehearsing.’
When he drew the car to a halt, Ciaran simply turned to her and drew her gently into his arms. Roxie found herself winding her arms around his neck and responding with a passion that seemed to affect her whole body, in places she had never considered before.
‘It has been a wonderful evening, Roxie,’ he murmured softly as he nibbled her ear, before his mouth found hers again, and again .
. . Reluctantly they drew apart. Ciaran sighed.
‘I expect Mum will have heard the car. She will be wondering why I’m keeping you out.
’ Roxie opened the car door to climb out but she laughed softly.
‘Your mother is a wise woman and she was young herself once. I expect she knows the sort of things her son gets up to.’
‘I suppose you’re right, but I don’t want to let you go.’
‘I know.’ Roxie smiled and her eyes sparkled.
‘Is there any chance you might feel the same, Roxie?’
‘There’s always a chance,’ Roxie replied lightly as she gently closed the car door.
* * *
Amy was pleased to see Roxie still smiling when she entered her sitting room. She looked happy.