Chapter 29
Jasper
It was unique to wake up the following day and not feel the firm grip of hatred crushing my chest. Instead, a small, perfect woman lay with her mouth open on my chest, making small, raspy huffs that were something between a snore and a breath.
Strands of frizzy brown hair fell over her face; some had gotten sucked into the wetness of her mouth, and other strands flapped like a flag following her inhales and exhales, tickling her lips.
My hand moved to brush the hair away. I wanted to see her beautiful face, but I didn’t want her to move and wake up, so I put my hand back on the bed.
I thought about everything that had happened yesterday, all of the information that came out. It was overwhelming. In a matter of a few sentences, my whole life had changed.
I think I’d had every emotion filter through me: shock, devastation, horror, disgust, guilt…but mostly relief. Then the guilt and devastation circled back around.
Mom hadn’t left me—not really.
For all these years, I’d hated her so much.
I’d hated them both for leaving me to die and not giving a shit what happened to me, but somehow her leaving had always hurt a little worse, maybe because she left first, even if it was only a few hours before my father.
I was just a kid and that was my mother, the most caring, wonderful person in my life.
I never understood what I’d done to make her stop loving me.
It had been so easy for me to believe that they had left because of what a shit kid I was.
I was angry and hurt. They should have told me she was sick.
I could have helped somehow. I wished more than anything she were still around so that I could tell her how sorry I was for hating her all of these years.
I wished I could hug her just one last time and tell her everything would be fine.
Eliza made a soft gagging sound and rolled her face into my armpit, clinging tighter to me.
Everything would be fine. Had Eliza not come into my life, I would have never known about my mom.
I probably would never have seen my father again—or been able to get him the help he needed.
I let out a heavy breath and felt a little different.
Had Eliza not pushed her way into my office and desperately demanded that I let her fix the conservatory, none of this would have happened.
I shifted her head carefully onto my shoulder and pulled her tighter against me.
I would never let her get away from me. We would go pick up her stuff after she woke up and bring it back here.
I couldn’t stand to not have her with me; we’d technically already lived together.
I would be slow and cautious with her; both of us had our own set of problems from our pasts, but even though I wanted her to feel comfortable and do things at her pace, I couldn’t help the way I was around her.
I needed her. I already knew she’s the only one I wanted to be with, and I’d do anything it took to keep her safe and happy forever.
But I wouldn’t pressure her. She’d had enough of that from her mother.
This needed to be done carefully. I wanted her happy.
She’d need a job, because I didn’t want her to feel trapped ever again—like she was reliant on someone else. I’d lived a whole life of doing whatever the fuck I wanted. I wanted that for her, and I would go to any means necessary to make certain I delivered.
An idea sparked in my mind, and I grabbed my phone from my nightstand to fire off a text, telling Sowerby to set up some things with the media. My teeth ground together out of habit. I fucking hated the media, but if Eliza gave the green light, then I was going to use them to my advantage.
“Hey, friend,” Eliza teased sleepily.
I tossed my phone back on the nightstand and pulled her closer, kissing her softly.
She pushed me away and covered her mouth with her hand. “You can’t kiss me. I have morning breath.”
I grabbed her hand and moved it, kissing her again, forcing my tongue inside her mouth. Savoring the taste of her. She giggled happily and it surged up into her sky-blue eyes.
I’m going to make her my wife one day.
I knew it like I knew leaves would fall in autumn or that rain falls from the sky. It wasn’t a question but a fact. I’d never let her get away from me.
“What are your plans for the day?” I asked. I didn’t want to rush things and scare her away. I knew her. I knew what would make her start to overthink. She couldn’t help it.
She let out a long exhale. “I need to go back to Nick’s and change. I have an interview at Bernard’s, that plant store in Johnstown. Other than that, nothing. Why? You need some help here?” She peered at me, hopeful.
“Do you want to work with plants still? I thought you hated it?” I prodded.
“I don’t hate it. I love looking at the plants; it’s just not my passion. It’s my parents’ passion. But it’s the only thing I’m qualified to do that will earn me any money, so I don’t really have a choice,” she said, looking a little defeated.
“Fuck your interview.”
She snorted. “Says the millionaire.”
I smiled, resisting the urge to grab her and kiss her senseless, morning breath and all.
“Let’s go get your stuff from Nick’s. I’ve got an idea that I’ll tell you about on the way there.” I wanted to demand it, and it would happen regardless, but I needed this to be her decision.
“All my stuff?” Her eyes grew worried. “Jasper, as much as I would want to, I can’t move in here and mooch off you, and the nearest job is at least two hours away.”
“Come on. Let’s get some breakfast, and I’ll tell you my idea. If you aren’t into it, we’ll figure something else out. But I need to call my landscapers really quick.”