Chapter 31
Chapter Thirty-One
Gray
The spray from the ocean misted against my face as its harsh waves crashed into the cliff face below.
The wind gusted against me, silencing the world as I basked in my element.
I thumbed the letter in my hoodie pocket, thinking now would be the perfect time to finally read it.
Something stopped me from pulling it out.
I still wasn’t ready to read her only words to me yet.
Slate stood beside me as we watched the wretched sea lash out its aggression.
We’d found a balcony during our exploration of the Druids’ home.
It wasn’t until we stepped out onto it that I realized we were inside the massive cliff Chrome had traveled us to.
For some reason, the rage from the sea and wind soothed me, maybe because it matched the inner turmoil that I worked so hard to ignore to function.
“I knew you’d like it here!” Slate yelled in order to be heard over the wind.
I smiled and breathed deeply, rejoicing in my element, which seemed to be in heaven itself.
I pulled from the sunlight to replenish my Kinetic magic, but it wasn’t the same as it would be if I had any sort of electricity or technology, which was completely absent in the Wind Kingdom.
Everything here was old and run by Druid magic.
We hadn’t seen Brecken again since he bid us goodnight last night.
However, during our walk, we came across many Druids, going about their day.
Many were dressed in brown leather warrior attire, strapped down with weapons that appeared older than time itself.
Others wore tunics, and some were even barefoot.
Men and women alike bowed as they passed by, welcoming me into their home and offering their respects.
At first, I was caught off guard. The trauma from my life growing up in the Kinetic Palace still left scars, causing me to expect disrespect or disdain.
But with each interaction, I found the Druid’s kindness easier to accept as I allowed myself to acknowledge the fact that I was meant to be a queen in this realm.
The reality set in that in order for that to happen, I would have to somehow unite Kinetics and Elementals and bring them back to Arcadia.
“Being at peace suits you,” Slate said directly in my ear, loud enough for me to hear. “You should try it more often, ya know.”
I turned to look at him, feeling balanced within myself for the first time in months. With a grin, I said, “You should try relaxing sometime instead of worrying about me so much. I think it would suit you.”
“I’m relaxed when you’re relaxed.”
“Well, be at ease then. Because I feel free right now,” I said, holding my arms out wide to embrace the wind.
Slate fell silent, and I glanced at him, worrying if I’d said something wrong. “What?”
He just stared at me, eyes glazed, like there was nothing else in the world around him. “You. I just—” He paused. “You never cease to amaze me, Gray.”
“I never thanked you, by the way,” I began. “For always being there, even when I was unaware. For loving me, even though you knew the truth. I’m so grateful for everything you’ve done for me.”
“I wouldn’t change a thing.” Slate’s expression crumbled momentarily before he recovered. “It’s been my honor.” His voice strained through the hoarseness.
My smile faltered as I felt pulled to comfort him. His hazel eyes glimmered as he absorbed all of me. “Slate…” I started reluctantly. I wanted to pull back, but I was rooted in place.
Slate shook out of his trance. “Gray, I’m sorry.
I just…I’ve always had this pull to you.
It’s due to the Guardian Bond we share, but even aside from that, I will always be in awe of you.
I can’t stop that or change it. But I know where your heart lies.
It would destroy me if you did something you later regretted, again. ”
I shook my head. “I don’t regret the other night, Slate. Not in the slightest. What I do regret is not having known the truth of what happened to you. That you had to sit back and watch me fall in love with Chrome when you never got proper closure.”
Slate forced a smile. “I always knew what was to come, Gray. You were never fully mine, and I accepted that, regardless of how much I loved you.”
“I regret not ever knowing your true self. You had to hold yourself back for me.”
“And I’d do it again if it meant—”
“Slate, no. You deserve your happiness, too.”
“I am happy. Serving you and helping Chrome…It’s what I’ve always known.
I’m happy if you’re happy and alive. As for Chrome, I just want him to be okay.
To find some normalcy and peace. He deserves nothing less.
I want him to finally get the girl.” Slate offered a sad smile.
“He’s been saving you for longer than you can know, Princess. ”
My heart twisted. “Well, it’s time for us to save him.”
Slate rubbed my upper arms. “It is. He can’t do this on his own.”
Several moments passed, during which the only sound was the howling wind. I mused over everything as I came to terms with this new dynamic between us.
At last, I broke the silence. “It’s been weird for me since you came back,” I admitted.
Slate huffed a chuckle. “I figured as much. You got the point across when you tried to beat me into submission in the training room.”
I rolled my eyes. “The unique relationships I share with you and Chrome run as deep as the intricacies that construct our universe. If it weren’t for either of you, I wouldn’t be where I am right now.
You saved me from myself. You lifted me up when I couldn’t even stand, empowered me when I was a broken little bird, and then armed me with deadly weapons.
You changed my life, Slate. But Chrome has, too.
He healed me just as much in a short time frame.
And I don’t understand what I’m supposed to do with”—I gestured to the space between us—“this.” I sighed, emptying my lungs.
“What happens to all of us when I find a way to restore him to himself? He’s going to be so—”
“Hey,” Slate said gently. “There is no rush to figure everything out. You love me, yes. But I think you only love the past version of us, Gray. You have a chance to have a future with Chrome, who deserves his happiness just as much as you do. The sacrifices he’s made—” Slate rolled his lips inward, catching himself.
“It’s not my place to tell, but all I want is for you to be happy.
To find your peace. I’ve had my time with you, and I cherished every moment knowing I wouldn’t be your forever.
But you deserved and needed the love I had to offer you then.
Since then, you’ve grown so damn much. You’ve become someone that your younger self would be so fucking proud of.
She wouldn’t have ever conceived that this is who you’d become one day.
I’ve done my part, baby girl. And my time is up with you.
But I’m still here by your side. And know that I’ll never stop loving you and having the breath knocked out of me whenever you—”
I couldn’t let him finish, because if he did, a large piece of my heart might crumble to dust. I threw my arms around his waist, burying my head into his chest. “I know, Slate. I’m sorry.
” He’d always be a safe place for me. Nothing could ever change that.
He was familiar, and the single positive thread from my past that remained intact.
While I loved Slate, it was a different sort of love than what I had for Chrome.
And it killed me to know that I could never fully return the love I once had for him years ago.
That he’d sacrificed so much for me, and I never had a clue.
I chose to be grateful for the time we had together, for having him in my life when I probably would’ve ended it all if it weren’t for him.
The bond between Slate and me would forever be there, but we both knew our time as romantic partners had come to an end.
Slate’s arms twined around my back, embracing me as if to shield me from the harsh gusts of the Druid kingdom. “Please don’t be. There’s nothing to be sorry for.”
“Yes, there is, because Chrome watched us. And when he’s restored…
I don’t know how we’ll all recover from that.
Especially with you two.” I felt awful knowing that I could’ve possibly ruined their close bond.
A relationship that went back to childhood.
I wasn’t even sure of the extent of it, but I knew it was one built on loyalty and trust, not just blood.
And in my desperation to escape the insanity of my life and to find closure, I could’ve destroyed it.
Slate’s throat bobbed against my forehead. “That’s not your problem, Princess. Chrome and I will work through whatever challenges come for us. We always have. We’ve just gotta bring him back to us first.”
The cliff face seemed to rumble, but I was sure I only imagined it. My thoughts and anxieties sank the weightlessness that I’d been reveling in only moments ago.
“Whatever you do, don’t feel bad about needing closure or choosing Chrome.
Two things can be true at the same time.
You’ve been through a lot lately. I knew it was a matter of time before your strong walls crumbled and you did something impulsive.
Not because you’re petulant, but because you would’ve suffocated from the weight of it all otherwise.
I know Chrome will understand when the time comes.
And regardless, he will love you no matter what you’ve done.
That man destroyed the veil and went dark for you.
I’m pretty sure he’ll forgive you, given the odd circumstances you were forced into.
” Slate kissed the top of my head. “It’s unfair because I’ve had years to come to terms with the reality of us—that I only had you on borrowed time. You haven’t had that.”