Chapter 14 #2
“I don’t care what you call him,” Elgen replies dismissively. “The boy only enables your pathetic behavior. No, you need the instruction of a proper teacher, and who better than one of the originals. You will come out of this stronger, I assure you.”
I quickly scramble to my feet, not at all feeling confident about this turn of events. “I hope you’re right.”
“Soooo, it looks like I’m getting a private lesson,” I joke to Knox. “Lucky me.”
He doesn’t smile. “You’re pathetic,” he says. “If you fight like that during the games you’ll be taken out within minutes.”
Ian huffs a laugh from where he’s still standing on his mat.
I give Knox a sweet smile. “Aw. You almost sound like you care.”
At that, gasps and hushed whispers erupt around the room. I know I’m playing with fire, but I’m so tired of the way Knox glares at me like everything I do personally offends him.
“Looks like I won’t need to take out the Token after all,” Ian comments with a laugh.
Knox narrows his eyes at me, and his shadows ripple in the air around us, creating a small dome that separates us from the other students. I recognize it instantly, knowing full well that while we’re inside it, the other students won’t be able to see or hear us.
“What’s that for? So the others won’t see you torturing me?” I joke, though my heart is pounding in my ears.
Knox’s nostrils flare with irritation. “You need to stop holding back,” he says, his voice like ice.
“I’m not holding back,” I counter. I’ve barely finished speaking when one of Knox’s shadows flicks out, knocking my legs and sending my ass straight back to the mat. With a yelp, I climb to my feet again.
“I don’t have time for your lies,” Knox seethes.
Clenching my jaw, I glower at him. “What lies?”
“You’re holding back because you don’t want to hurt your…friend,” Knox says, biting out the last word. “But do you really think he will spare you when you’re in the games? When survival means only one of you gets to live?”
I swallow hard. “It won’t come to that. The queen wants as many new soldiers for her army as she can get.”
Knox lets out a dark laugh, and he gives me an unkind smile.
“The queen wants warriors, yes, but she also believes in sacrificing for the cause.” An emotion I can’t place flickers across his face before it’s gone again.
“According to the queen, sacrifice breeds strength. Pitting off friends against each other is her favorite past time. And if that happens, you need to be the one standing when the shadows clear.”
My stomach churns. Would the queen really do that? The idea of having to hurt Jensen or Kenzie, to kill them, makes me feel sick. I don’t ask myself if I could do it. I already know the answer and it’s a firm ‘no.’
As if Knox can read my thoughts, he says, “No one thinks they can go through with it until the time comes. But when death is breathing down your neck and you realize there’s only one path to immortality, everything becomes crystal clear.”
“Maybe for some,” I counter. “Why do you care what happens to me anyway?”
He looks down at me, his face a hard mask of stone. “I don’t.”
Those two little words shouldn’t hurt me, but they do. I stuff the pain down deep.
“But Thane and Galen care,” Knox adds. “So does my brother. They believe you’re their mate, and despite my warnings, they’ve all become…attached to you. You need to survive for them.”
“Ah,” I say softly. “So you do care about something after all.”
I don’t mean to let the hurt come out in my voice, but it does.
For a moment, Knox’s face softens a fraction, but then that hard mask slides back into place.
“I care about this war,” he says stiffly.
“About ending it.” His words seem to hang in the air like he’s leaving something unsaid, but I have no idea what.
“Why do you hate me so much?” I ask. It’s not an accusation, but simply a question. He wouldn’t be the first person to hate me, nor the last, but even from here I feel drawn to him. There’s no denying we’re fated, and yet he’s so determined to believe otherwise.
His lips part, and for a heartbeat, he looks…
vulnerable. My heart races, because for that brief second, I think I’m finally going to find out why he’s always so distant.
But instead of answering, his expression shuts off and he sends a volley of shadows in my direction.
They spear toward me like attacking ghosts, and I lift my arms trying to block them as they batter against my body.
He hasn’t sent them to kill me, and I’m sure he’s only using a fraction of his power, but they still sting when they connect with my skin.
“Not with your body,” Knox snarls. “Block them with your shadows.”
“What? I don’t have any,” I reply, twisting to avoid another one of his shadows but failing miserably. It slides against my waist, and even though the shadow glides off me, it leaves a trail of pain behind. I gasp at the agony, only just managing to keep my knees from buckling.
“What did I say about lying?” he growls.
I breathe rapidly, my gaze connecting with Knox’s. I think of the only time I’ve ever managed to wield shadows. About how they’d appeared last night when I’d been with Galen and Raith. My cheeks flush. “That was different,” I say.
Knox doesn’t relent. His shadows batter against me over and over, swarming around me, sliding against my skin, hurting me until I can barely breathe. I try to reach for my magic, but all I can focus on is the pain and the assault of shadows coming at me.
“You’re not even trying,” Knox snarls. “Do you want to live? Do you want immortality?”
Of course, I do, but the shadows inside me still don’t stir.
Knox lets out a noise of frustration. “If you won’t fight for yourself, then maybe you’ll fight for someone else. Your friend is almost as pathetic as you are.”
I don’t realize what he’s doing until one of his shadows spears into the dome wall. It returns shortly after, pulling a struggling Kenzie into the dome.
“Shade!” she yells, her eyes wide with panic as she glimpses me bent over.
Knox’s shadow doesn’t release her. Instead, it grows in size until it’s a large band around her waist, and it squeezes her tightly. Whatever pain he sends into her, Kenzie lets out an ear-splitting scream that fills the dome.
“No! Stop!” I shout at Knox. I take a step toward him, but his shadows block my way, sending more pain sinking into my body. “Do it to me,” I gasp, my head starting to spin.
Kenzie is still screaming. Her cheeks go red, and her face contorts with pain.
“What are you doing to her?” I rasp. “Let her go!”
Knox studies me, and there’s not a hint of remorse in his cold expression. “Make me, mate,” he says, his voice deadly calm as he mocks me.
Tears prick at my eyes as Kenzie continues to scream, and she writhes in the air held up by his shadow.
Forgotten memories prickle at the edges of my mind as I watch her helplessly.
A sense of familiarity makes my gut churn, and I know I’ve felt like this before.
I’m not sure why or how, but I’ve lived a moment similar to this.
I’ve been trapped. Helpless. …But I’m not powerless this time.
My magic explodes. Power rushes through my body as at least a dozen small shadows shoot out from me, soaring toward Knox.
He bats them away with his own shadows, but they only veer around, returning to attack him relentlessly.
They’re not as strong as Knox’s, but they distract him enough that his hold on Kenzie falters.
The moment I sense the weakness, my shadows curve around, and I create a small shadow dome around Kenzie, protecting her from my deranged mate.
Knox snarls, his shadows attacking me now that I’m undefended again. They wind around my limbs, dragging me forward until I’m suspended directly in front of him. I keep my power flowing to the dome around Kenzie, glad that at least she’s safe.
“What is wrong with you? It’s like you want to die,” Knox says, his furious gaze fixated on my face.
Now it’s my turn to be pissed off. “I’m not going to let you torture my friend just to get to me. Besides, isn’t this what you wanted?” I indicate to the shadows flowing out of me. I’m still shocked that I managed to create them, but I can’t mentally unpack that right now.
“What I want is for you to actually try to stay alive,” he bites out. “If you die, this will break them, and unless you try harder, you’re not going to make it. There’s no escape for you.”
I glare at him. I don’t need to ask to know who ‘them’ is.
It’s sweet that he cares about his friends, but it’s hard to think about that when I feel like slapping his stupid, annoyingly attractive, but completely arrogant face.
He’s so close now, and his scent reaches me, heady and intoxicating.
Desire makes my body heat, and I curse internally.
Stop it, Shade, I singsong to myself in my head.
You hate this man, remember? It doesn’t matter that he's your fated mate.
“I am trying to stay alive,” I defend. “It’s not my fault my magic is broken.”
A muscle tightens in his jaw, and his gaze slowly roves over me before he inspects my shadows. “We’re all broken,” he eventually says, his voice low. “That’s why we’re here.”
At once, his shadows release me, and I drop to the floor, unable to land on my feet. My shadows disappear, and Kenzie gasps, rushing over to me.
Without another glance at us, Knox turns, and the large dome dissolves around us as he starts to walk away. The rest of the students come into view crowded around the dome, and I sag on the mat. The students part as Knox approaches, and as he passes them, he snarls, “Everyone back to work.”