Chapter 21
Chapter Twenty-One
~ Knox ~
“How’d it go?”
I don’t answer as Thane strides from the forest, heading straight for me.
Continuing my task, my shadows flick out, testing the magical barrier around the academy.
Power pushes against my shadows as my magic reaches out, testing, shaking the fabric of that barrier.
Ensuring the magic is strong enough to keep the Xalgrith out.
Then my shadows recoil, returning to me as I walk along the academy wall, searching for another area to test.
Bonfang is sitting close by, and his red eyes remain ever watchful as he assesses Thane. I send my wolf a mental request, and he stalks off into the trees, disappearing into the shadows.
Thane follows after me as I move along the barrier, testing the magic at intervals, taking my time. He follows me in silence for a while, also testing the barrier every so often, though we both know the magic is intact.
“I should have gone with you,” Thane growls, leaning back on his heels as he stares at me.
I finally turn to him. “No. She summoned me. If she wishes to keep me close so she can keep an eye on me, I’ll happily oblige.”
Thane still doesn’t look happy, but he doesn’t argue with that either. “Did you find out any information about who orchestrated the attack by the foxrets?”
“Either no one knows or they’re playing dumb,” I answer, thinking about the conversations I had with members of the serving staff after my audience with the queen. “Either way, we can handle a few pathetic attempts to end our lives. We have bigger problems.”
“The games?”
“They’ll be here to erect the stadium in a few days,” I confirm.
Thane curses and scrubs a hand over his jaw. “I was hoping she’d come to see reason.”
“There isn’t any reasoning with her,” I point out. “It’s not just about getting more soldiers. She’s hoping the games will boost the morale of the troops. The situation out there must be worse than we thought.”
“Yes, because nothing fosters hope like watching the slaughter of the next generation of warriors,” Thane replies dryly.
We’re silent for a moment, and I continue along the academy wall, testing the magic as Thane follows me quietly. Another few minutes passes before he says, “We’ve been patient, Knox.”
That makes me pause.
“Can’t you at least try?” he asks, and I stiffen, because I immediately know where this conversation is headed. “If the games are almost upon us as you say, she needs you,” Thane goes on. “You may be the final connection she needs to remove the block.”
I turn to him, anger coursing through me. “Is that what you’ve taken from this? You’re all still playing stupid games,” I snarl. “Your chance to play with your little mate has almost come to an end.”
“Our mate,” Thane corrects gruffly.
My jaw tightens, my heart pounding at his words though I tell myself they shouldn’t affect me. “My only mate was taken from me,” I state, coldly.
Thane grunts in frustration, running a hand through his hair. “We haven’t ruled out that Shade could be that same mate. And yet, you’d condemn her?”
“Condemn her?” I round on him. “I told you that’s impossible. I know what I felt. Our mate died all those years ago.”
He moves closer, not shying away from my anger. Not even as my shadows coil around me, just waiting for the command to attack.
“Taste her, and I’ll believe you,” Thane rumbles, getting in my face. “She survived Raith’s monster, and she’s growing stronger every day. You can’t run from this, Knox. She could be a fresh start for all of us.”
I give him a bitter smile. “She’s not a fresh start. She’s a curse. And when she dies during the games and you’re all left in pieces, you’ll finally understand what I’ve been trying to warn you away from.”
Thane doesn’t budge. “Don’t punish her because of something that happened in the past.”
My jaw ticks. “I’m not punishing anyone. She’s better off without someone like me, and you know it.” I close the last distance between us, and Thane’s gaze falls to my lips. He grips my jaw roughly, and I smirk, enjoying the way his fingers dig into my skin.
“She’s ours, Knox,” he growls. “I know you feel it. Just like you felt it when I fucked her in that clearing.”
My face twitches, my cock hardening at the thought. “She doesn’t need me.”
He scoffs. “If you think that, then you’re blind.”
“Then let me be blind! For all our sakes,” I snarl. “Because I will not survive the loss of another mate.”
His chest rises and falls as he stares at me, and I know he sees the truth in my eyes. No one else understands me like Thane does.
“I fear none of us will,” he growls back, and then his lips crash to mine.
I kiss him back just as roughly, our shadows clashing as we collide.
Her scent clings to him, and I grunt as Thane grabs the back of my neck and pushes me face first against a nearby tree.
The bark scratches against my cheek, the scent of pine filling my nose, and I let him hold me there.
I could fight him. I could easily win, too, because Thane would never hurt me, but that’s not what I want nor what I need right now.
Using his boot, he forces my legs wider, and I groan as his shadows yank down my pants. “Time’s running out, Knox,” he growls, his lips by the side of my face, and his whiskers scraping against my skin. “Don’t let her be another regret.”
My nostrils flare. “You’ll be the one with regrets when she’s dissected by the queen and displayed for all to see,” I tell him coldly, hating that I speak the truth.
He growls loudly, spitting on his cock and fisting himself before he drives it into me. He isn’t gentle, and I grunt as he thrusts into my ass, giving me exactly what I want. What we both need, after that fucking display we just watched with Raith’s monster and the human.
I enjoy the sting of pain that gives way to pleasure as he groans, pounding into me until he reaches a furious pace, the tree punishing against my cheek.
This man is my fucking anchor, and I feel my sanity returning as he drives hard into me, pumping into me over and over, helping to chase away my demons, even if it’s for the briefest fucking moment.
But for the first time in a long while, it’s not enough. Not when her scent stains his skin, and when her face haunts my thoughts. Not when the queen’s threat is still fresh in my mind. And not when the human’s scream pierces my mind.
There should only be darkness. Despite all I’ve told Thane and the others, this was the one thing I couldn’t resist—giving the human peace while she slept.
My justification was that I couldn’t sleep myself while listening to her wailing.
It was a small mercy, on my part, to take away her nightmares, but it was something I could do while still keeping my distance from her.
However, tonight her screams echo through my head, and it’s a keening desperate sound that tugs at something in the dark depths of my soul, touching a part of me I thought I’d long since buried. Somehow, she must have found her way into a nightmare despite the magic I’d used on her. Impossible.
When Thane returns to the academy building, I slip into her dreams, dressed in a long cloak with the hood down to hide my features.
She stops screaming the moment I enter her mind, and I locate the human crouched against a bare, stone wall.
Her knees are tucked up to her chest, and her long hair is draped across her face.
I’ve heard plenty of people crying. I’ve extracted their cries, relishing in the sound as I’ve inflicted pain to those whom I deemed deserved it.
But this sound… It penetrates to my core like no blade could, digging and twisting like something is burying itself inside me, trying to carve into my being.
I fucking hate it.
I’m about to shut off whatever strange nightmare this is.
To make it fade away to darkness, but her head snaps up, her gaze immediately finding me.
Tears spill from her eyes as she stares at me, and I note the grime smeared on her face.
Blood is coating her messy hair and soaked into her clothes.
Her brows furrow, and though she’s looking at me, her eyes move like she’s struggling to focus.
“Please, just take me back,” she rasps, shaking her head as she blinks through her tears. “Please. He’ll come for me.”
I stand there silently, frozen as my chest aches with a pain I have no right to feel. A pain I shouldn’t be able to feel, because I shut off my emotions a long time ago.
She pulls her legs tighter to her chest like she’s trying to become as small as possible, and a rat scurries past her bare feet.
“This is a dream, Shade,” I tell her, clearing away the unexpected emotion that’s clogging my throat.
“No,” she says, shaking her head at me. “I’m not stupid.
I remember. Please send me back.” She keeps muttering the same thing over and over, and I feel them then.
The monsters in the shadows feeding on her fear.
On her pain. I feel her spiraling, her mind spinning out of control as the nightmare seizes her.
I’m not sure if this is her subconscious dealing with the fact that she wishes to leave Shadowbone. I thought she’d become happier at the academy now that she has my brother, Thane, and Galen. No, this seems like something else.
The monsters in the darkness draw closer to her, and I know I can’t leave her like that.
Power pulses from me, and darkness pulls down over us as I flush the dream from her mind.
I feel her mind calm as it retreats, the nightmare banished as she falls into a deep, dreamless sleep.
I use more power, ensuring the lingering remnants of the nightmare won’t bother her when she wakes. She won’t remember this.
Sliding from her dream, I walk amongst the trees of the academy forest, my heart pounding from what I’ve witnessed. I know I’ve simply seen a nightmare, but I can’t stop picturing her tortured eyes, and the comment she made repeats over and over in my mind: He’ll come for me.
Bonfang appears from the shadows, prowling beside me, sensing that I need him, though he’s not sure what has happened. We move between the trees, and I appreciate his silent company as I head for the one place where I know I can find some solitude.