34. Chapter Thirty-Four
Chapter Thirty-Four
Asheros
M y eyes flash open, and my hands grab at nothing.
Rising to a sitting position, I take in my surroundings. I’m in a bed, and it’s morning. One look at the bronze-colored drapes and furnishings tells me I’m at High Keep.
“Good,” a male voice says from my bedside. “You’re awake.”
My head snaps in the voice’s direction. By the far wall, near the door, Viridian lounges in a padded chair.
“Where is she?” I demand, making a move to rise to my feet. The sudden rush to my head nearly knocks me to the ground.
“She’s safe.” Viridian’s words are clipped. “No thanks to you.”
Narrowing his amber eyes, he ascends to his full height. “Tell me,” he says, taking a step forward. “Are you responsible for the attack at Nemos’s pass?”
“Nemos’s pass?” I repeat, cocking my head. In an attempt to sway his suspicion, I ask, “Now, why would you ask me about that?”
“You’d be interested to know her carriage was recovered. When my guards arrived, they told me they’d stepped into the wake of a bloodbath. Then, the next time I see her, she’s with you, unconscious.” Viridian comes even closer now, hard lines forming at his jaw. “I won’t ask you again. Are you responsible for the attack?”
Hardening my expression, I tilt my head back and puff out my chest to the extent that I can, not once tearing my eyes from his.
Since fae can’t lie, there’s only one way to answer that question.
So I opt to say nothing instead.
Viridian’s eyes flare, electricity snapping between his fingertips. “I see.”
He steps back, and his lightning fizzles until there’s none of it left. Turning his face from mine slightly, he clears his throat. “Guards. Take him.”
Violently, the doors swing open.
I clench my teeth, keeping my arms pressed to my sides. Staring at Viridian, who stands before me the entire time, I let the guards restrain me, their grip on my arms iron-tight.
“As I told you before,” I seethe, my voice dripping with malice, “I will give you anything.” I pause, taking a breath before I continue. “As long as you give my mate the help she needs.”
Shock stuns Viridian’s angular features, and his mouth parts. “Lymseia is your mate?”
“Yes,” I growl, possessiveness lacing my words. “My mate.”
Viridian recovers quicker than I thought he would, leveling his expression. “Lymseia is with the royal healers. They’re doing everything they can for her.”
“Good,” I tell him.
Then I let his guards take me away.
T ime passes differently in the royal dungeons. With no windows, or any other glimpses into the outside world, it’s difficult to say how long I’ve been held. It could be hours, or it could be days, and I wouldn’t know.
My body is too weak to stand, still depleted from the massive amount of energy I spent to conjure the portal. Even at full strength, the reinforced steel bars caging me would be a formidable foe—one I don’t think I’d be able to defeat .
All I can do is wait.
And worry.
Gods, I worry so much.
I worry that Lymseia will never wake up. I worry that I’ll lose her.
I worry that I already have.
No, I tell myself. I would know if I’d lost her. I would feel it—the pain of her absence, weighing down on me like an executioner’s blade. Losing her would be a fate far worse than death.
She’s still there, in my mind. Faint, but there. Whatever magic has her under its thrall, it’s keeping her soul locked away from mine.
But my mate is a fighter. She won’t give into anything without a fight. I can feel it—feel her fighting for her life. She’s tired, but still, she’s relentless.
“Good,” I muse into the empty space. “Fight, my fearless Bladesinger. And don’t you dare stop fighting.”
The sound of the door scraping stone has me hoisting myself to my feet. If there’s one thing my worthless excuse for a father taught me, it’s to always look a stronger male in the eyes.
I expect footsteps to follow, but only voices travel down the dungeon steps.
“ Viridian . You understand the mate bond better than anyone,” a feminine voice protests, fierce with conviction. Almost immediately, I recognize it as Cryssa, Viridian’s wife and mate. “How can you lock him up?”
“If only it was that simple, Little Fawn.” A sigh. “He may be Lymseia’s mate, but he’s responsible for the attack at Nemos’s pass. For the deaths of good, loyal members of the Guard. If I let that go unpunished, I risk losing the council’s support. Given the existing threats to our rule, and perhaps to our lives— to your life —that’s not something I’m willing to risk.”
They’re silent for what feels like a long while.
Cryssa lets out a huff. Footsteps sound back and forth, as if she’s pacing. “Well, we can’t leave him there.”
Viridian exhales. “I know. I need time to consider what I’ll tell the council. Some sort of solution I can present that they’ll accept.”
That must satisfy her, because the pacing stops. “We’ll think of something. Together.”
“Always,” Viridian murmurs.
Cloth rustles, as if he’s pulling her into his arms.
“Go,” he says, his voice soft. “I’ll come find you after.”
“All right,” Cryssa replies, her tone matching that of her mate. “I love you more than anything.”
“More than anything,” Viridian repeats.
With a set jaw, I straighten my back and train my eyes ahead.
The High King stalks to my jail cell, keeping more than an arm’s length between us. If he suspects I overheard his exchange with Cryssa, he doesn’t show it .
The male I used to be would have been enraged, demanding to be released at once. He would claim the king has no evidence, therefore no reason to hold me here.
But now?
Now I understand. Viridian is doing what he thinks is best for his kingdom. For his mate. I’d do the same for mine. Keeping her safe is never far from my mind.
“What is it?” Anxiety has its tight grip around my throat, threatening to choke me. “Is she awake?” When Viridian says nothing, my hard demeanor falls apart. “Please, I need to know if she’s all right.”
Viridian swallows, tension working at his jaw. He merely shakes his head. “No. She hasn’t awakened yet.”
“Then try something else,” I demand, slamming my hand against the hard, stone wall. “Do something!”
“I am trying something else,” Viridian says, mouth tight. He gestures toward my cell, and with a wave of his hand, the guard accompanying him quickly undoes the door’s magical lock. Opening it, he stands aside, creating a forward path for me.
I stare at the guard and then Viridian. “What is this?”
“Come with me,” Viridian says, already moving toward the door leading out of the dungeon.
Hesitation slows my movements, my feet stopping just before crossing into the space outside of my cell.
Is this a trick?
“If you care for Lymseia,” Viridian says, raising his voice so I can hear, “you’ll come with me.”
“I would do anything for her,” I tell him, my tone icy.
“Her clock is ticking, Lord Larmanne.”
This may still be a trick, but it’s a risk I’m willing to take.
I waste no time. Quickly, I catch up to Viridian, adjusting my pace to maintain a good distance behind him. The guards close in around me, blocking me from all sides, moving as one. Viridian leads us up High Keep’s main staircase, through a hallway, and into a bedchamber.
My heart stops when I see her.
Gods, even like this, she’s absolutely breathtaking.
She lays in the center of a four-poster bed. Thick blankets cover her up to her waist, but I can see the black fighting leathers she usually wears have been removed and replaced with a cream satin nightgown. Her hair has been brushed smooth, free from tangles, framing her strong, tan face. Even her rosy lips are perfectly soft, just begging to be kissed. They’ve gone so far as to rest her hands over her stomach, the daintiest I’ve ever seen them.
The fae fussing over her, healers judging by the way they tenderly adjust her blankets and pillows, pause to look at us.
With one motion from Viridian, they bow and exit the room, including the guards who take their leave, closing the door behind them.
“Tell me what’s wrong with her,” I beg, my voice raw.
“The healers tell me she’s been placed under a sleeping curse,” Viridian says, his voice grave. “Who did this to her? ”
At my sides, my hands ball into fists. “The same male who killed your father.”
Viridian turns his face from mine and takes a breath. “I see.”
The gravity of our circumstances drowns me. “You brought me here to say goodbye, didn’t you.” The words are more of a statement than a question. “The healers can’t do anything for her, can they?”
“I brought you here because she’s your mate,” Viridian says. “I know all too well the pain of losing your mate. How much it breaks you.”
“Thank you,” I say, struggling to find my voice. “For your kindness.”
Viridian nods and then moves for the door. “I will give you as much time as I can. We’ll be waiting in the hall.”
I rush to Lymseia’s bedside, falling to my knees.
Viridian opens the door, pausing with his hand on the knob. “Don’t lose hope.” He presses his lips together. “The love my mate has for me was strong enough to break my father’s curse. Perhaps…” His voice trails off. “Perhaps your love for her can, too.”
Tears well in my eyes, blurring my vision. “Gods, I hope so.”
Could we be that lucky?
With one last glance, Viridian steps out, leaving me alone with my mate’s lifeless form.
Taking her hand, I crawl into bed with her and pull her to my chest. Pressing my lips to her forehead, I squeeze my eyes shut, clinging to her with everything I have left. With all that I am.
Letting my tears fall, I let out a scream.
And another. And another. And another.
I scream for all that was stolen from us. From the years we should have had, to the life we should have lived. I scream because it’s all I can do. It’s the only way to cope with the horrible, agonizing pain that tears me apart from the inside out, splitting my soul in two.
Half will remain with me.
But the other half, the better half, will always, always be hers. Wherever she goes.
I don’t know how, but I know that when she does finally leave this world, I will go, too.
I have to.
And so I hold her. I hold onto her as if she is the one thing I need more than anything. More than the air I breathe. More than the food that sustains me. More than the water I drink. She is my end and my beginning. My ruination and my salvation. My rise and my fall all wrapped into one.
She is mine. All mine.
But gods, I belong to her so, so much more than she could ever belong to me. She may be mine, but my claim to her pales in comparison to her possession of me. I’m hers in every way possible. She owns me, everything that I am, body and soul. Her happiness is my happiness, her sorrows are my sorrows, her triumphs are my triumphs. No amount of time with her will ever be enough. I’m a beggar, and she is priceless gold. I will take whatever piece of her I can have, no matter how little.
Over, and over, and over again, I breathe in the scent of her hair, like freshly fallen rain over soft grass. Sobs consume me, and I unravel into a mess of agonizing torment.
My heart aches as though it’s breaking apart.
It is breaking.
Tenderly cupping her cheek with my palm, I turn her face to mine. “Wherever you are, I pray you can hear me. I love you, Lymseia Wynterliff, my fearless Bladesinger. My beautiful mate. I love you to the ends of the earth, and through whatever follows this world.”
Tears choke me, but I don’t stop. “I love you. I love you. I love you, my Bladesinger. Please, please come back to me. Come back to me.” Wheezes tear from my throat. “I’m begging you.” My chest heaves so strongly, I’m shaking. Tilting my head, I touch my forehead to hers and shut my eyes. Then I lightly graze my lips against hers, pressing a soft kiss to her lips.
One. Last. Time.
I don’t let go of her when the door opens. Or when the guards and healers rush back in. Or even when the guards wrestle with me to release her.
Viridian turns away, averting his eyes.
It’s only when the guards pry me away from her, dragging me from the room kicking and screaming and thrashing, that she finally slips from my grasp.