Chapter 11 #2
Tamsin felt bile rise in her throat. How could she be such a fool? She was imagining Garret Kildare felt something for her, wanted her to be part of his future. Why else would he want to help her find Snoozer?
But all along he’d been paying calls on women he considered fit to marry, while pretending to care about whether she ever located Charlie and Joanna.
“We can discuss it later.”
“What’s wrong with now?” Tamsin emerged from behind the screen. She’d given up on her coat and tossed it on the floor. “Now seems as good a time as any.”
“Tamsin—”
“It’s Miss Archer, Kildare. I only allow people I know and trust to use my Christian name.”
Killian Kildare stood frozen, wineglass to his lips, eyes wide.
“Miss Archer then. Let me explain.”
“Explain? Explain that while you were meeting me at midnight, kissing me in the rain, and doing the cunnus lingere—”
Killian Kildare choked on his wine and began to cough uncontrollably.
“—you have actually been trying to marry some other woman?”
“Killian.” Garret hit his brother on the back to try and ease his coughing fit. “Could you give us some privacy?”
Killian looked up, red-faced. “This is my studio,” he wheezed.
Garret steered his brother toward the door. “And you can have it all to yourself later today. Come back in an hour.” He cut his gaze to Tamsin, who crossed her arms and glared at him. “Maybe two.”
“I’m hiding my spare key,” Killian said as Garret opened the door and pushed him out. “This is the last time—”
Garret shut the door, cutting off his brother’s protest.
“All this time,” Tamsin said, glaring at him, “you have been behaving as though I was the one keeping secrets. But you have your own secrets, Mr. Kildare. You don’t really care about Charlie and Joanna.
Why did I ever think you did?” She closed her eyes and covered them with her hands.
“I should have known a man like you wouldn’t care what happened to two poor children.
If you just wanted to roger me, then you should have said so.
” She dropped her hands and stepped toward him.
“I would have done anything to be close to you. But you shouldn’t have made me feel like you actually cared.
” Her voice hitched and she swore. The last thing she wanted was to cry in front of this man.
If she wept in front of him, she’d really be humiliated.
“Tam—Archer, I do care about Charlie and Joanna. I do care about you. This hasn’t anything to do with any of that.”
“So you always bring a tiger in disguise to go down to the kitchens and snoop while you call on eligible rich women?”
“No.” He stepped toward her, arm outstretched. She shook her head, and he lowered his arm. “I had to make those calls, and I thought…two birds, one stone…”
“Oh, I see. Saving the lives of my brother and sister was just a pastime. And what about me, Kildare? Was I just a diversion while you proposed to the woman you really want?”
“Archer, I don’t want any of those women. I want you.”
“I should have listened to my mother.” She bent and picked up the coat then realized it wasn’t her coat.
Nothing she wore was hers, but she wasn’t storming out of here half-dressed.
She clenched the coat in her arms and pushed past him.
“I was such a fool. You don’t want me. You could never want someone like me. ”
She opened the door and Killian Kildare fell forward. “Er—hello again.” He tumbled to his knees.
“Did you miss anything?” She stepped over him.
“No. You spoke loudly enough, but I’m not sure who Joanna and Charlie are.”
“Ask him.” She pointed to Garret. “Not that he cares.” She ran down the steps and out of the building just before the tears could begin streaming down her face.
She didn’t know if Kildare would come after her.
She hoped he would, but at the same time, she knew if she let him explain and apologize, she would forgive him.
She didn’t want to forgive him. She wanted to hold on to this feeling and be clear-eyed about the situation.
She ducked down the alley at the end of the lane and slid behind a stack of old wooden casks. A moment later she heard his voice. “Tamsin! Tamsin!”
She closed her eyes and felt more hot tears spill down her cheeks. She swiped them away, angry that she’d allowed herself to trust him. It was her fault she was hurt. She’d believed he was different from other men. Why? Because he’d bought some drooping violets?
He was no different.
· · ·
Garret trudged back up the stairs to his brother’s studio, winded and dejected. He opened the door and came face-to-face with Killian.
“Are you done making a fool of yourself?” his brother asked.
Garret clenched his fist. Hitting someone or something would feel excellent right now. “Shut your potato hole or I’ll do it for you.” His voice was little more than a growl.
“Go ahead then.” Killian obviously didn’t take the warning. “I can see you’re spoiling for a fight.” His brother hunched into a defensive posture and put his fists up. “Come on.”
Garret saw red, and before he could think better of it, he threw a sharp left hook.
Killian was ready and ducked fast enough to avoid the blow.
He came up swinging, hitting Garret on the shoulder hard enough that he stumbled back.
“That was a prelude,” Killian said. “Next, I’ll bruise your pretty face. ”
“I’m not the one who should be worried.” Garret jabbed with his right arm, his knuckles glancing off Killian’s jaw.
“You’ll pay for that.”
“Make me!”
Killian doubled over and plowed into Garret, hitting him in the belly and sending all the air whooshing out of him.
They both tumbled backward. Something crashed and something else clattered, but Garret didn’t care.
He attacked without knowing what he was hitting.
Killian struck back, the blow powerful enough that Garret’s ears were ringing.
But he fought best when he was on defense, and he grappled with Killian until he was on top, fist pulled back, ready to smash that sniveling grin off his brother’s face. Killian winced, his eyes closed…
Garret blew out a breath and opened his fist. What the hell was he doing?
Killian was his brother, not his enemy. Garret rolled off him and collapsed on his back on the floor.
Paintbrushes were strewn around both of them.
Garret could almost hear Killian thinking about taking advantage of the moment and punching Garret just one more time.
“Don’t do it,” Garret said. “Or we’ll wreck the whole place.”
Killian raised himself on one elbow and surveyed the damage. Garret noted they’d broken an easel, one painting was on the floor, and the dirty water his brother’s brushes had been sitting in was now soaking into the carpet.
“Fine. But I could beat you,” Killian said.
“Believe that if it makes you feel better. But you’re not the one I want to hit.” He wanted to hit Snoozer, though the chimney sweep was not to blame for Tamsin’s anger this time. Garret had done this to himself.
Killian looked away from the stain on the carpet and at Garret. “Don’t tell me you want to hit that imp of a girl?”
“Never. And she’s no girl. She’s about the same age as you. I should have explained to her before that I need to find an heiress. She thought—well, never mind what she thought.”
“It sounded like she thought you had feelings for her.”
Garret wanted to hit him again for rubbing that in. “I do have feelings for her. But how can she possibly think I’d marry her? She’s…well…she’s who she is and I’m…” He threw an arm over his face because it sounded even worse when he said it aloud.
Killian raised his brows. “Do go on. The son of an earl?” He used that tone he employed when he wanted to sound like a priggish lord. “You are a member of the nobility.” He could imitate an ancient duke with a cold better than most actors.
“I’m an arse.” Garret sighed, and it wasn’t just that punch to his torso that was making his chest hurt.
“You are.”
“But I’m the arse who needs to marry an heiress and save this family.”
Killian waved a hand. “Oh, let Daire or me do it. Better yet, let Liam rescue the family.”
Garret blinked. He’d never considered that this burden wasn’t his to bear. Could he let another of the brothers shoulder it? “If Liam’s the one to save us, we’ll never hear the end of it.”
Killian smiled. “Yes, but Liam lives to be better than us. Why deprive him of his one pleasure in life?”
“You’re forgetting the summer house.” Garret no longer cared about the summer house; it had never meant as much to him as it did to Killian. And it meant far less to Garret now that he’d met Tamsin.
“Damn, I did forget it. And I need that space to paint. Don’t tell me you were choosing the summer house over Miss Archer?
She may be short and so thin she’ll blow away in a stiff breeze, but she’s pretty.
And, from what I heard, she has some spirit.
Clearly, she has feelings for you, and when will you ever find a chit who fancies you again? ”
Garret smiled faintly at his brother’s insult. “She doesn’t fancy me.”
“It sounded to me like she does.”
“Well, you were listening through the door.”
“It’s a thin door.” Killian pushed up. “But don’t let me stop you from your whirlwind romance with Miss Grant.”
“That’s ended before it began. She’s betrothed.”
“Thank God. I’m half-afraid a dinner with our family would give Miss Grant apoplexy. Now, if you don’t mind, I came here to work. Instead, I must clean up this mess. And my maid just came too.”
Garret climbed to his feet and gathered his clothing, donning some of it as he did. “I’ll go.”
Killian bent down and scooped up his brushes, dropping them into his previously overturned water can. “Are you going after her?” he asked. “Miss Archer, not…”
He met Garret’s gaze then looked back at his brushes.
He wanted to go after her. He wanted to chase her down, sweep her into his arms, and tell her nothing mattered but her.
But life wasn’t that simple. He had a duty to his family, not only to marry an heiress but to represent them in Society.
How could he do his duty if he married a woman with no connections, no money, and no future?
He’d lose everything and everyone he loved.
Garret took a breath and straightened his shoulders.
“Absolutely not. I have enough to do without chasing after Tamsin Archer.” He stomped to the door and yanked it open.
“Oh, you’re going after her,” Killian called over his shoulder. “That summer house is mine.”
Garret uttered an oath and slammed Killian’s door behind him. Of course he was going after Tamsin Archer.