Chapter Thirty-Four
Henry ended the call after thanking Dermot Dixon for his co-operation.
In the two months that had passed since he spoke to Ava, he felt he was making a difference, turning the fortunes of the estate and Dapplebury House around.
He had plans underway for opening the house, the legalities and insurance were complicated but not insurmountable, and he had set to on the other practicalities involved.
While all of these things took time and money, he was beginning to see how his plans could come to fruition.
Mrs Jenkins had been an asset. The woman who once walked the corridors of Dapplebury House and lurked like a ghost, now had a purpose and was putting her organisational skills to great use.
Henry looked at Critters’ Cottage, trying to summon the courage to leave the car and knock on the door.
A week ago he’d slipped discreetly into the pub with the hope of bumping into Ava.
But having seen her looking so happy, Gino next to her, he had decided to leave.
But no matter what he did, he couldn’t get her out of his mind.
Every step he made towards realising his vision for the village and Dapplebury House, he wanted to share with her.
And it wasn’t just the big things either; every time he ran in the grounds and spotted evidence of a new creature or plant in the woods he wanted to tell her.
He wanted to tell her that he was having the lake dredged, he wanted to tell her how much Granger missed her, and .
. . Who was he kidding? He wanted to tell her how much he missed her.
He had taken time to decide if sharing his feelings and daring to hope she might feel the same was fair.
His family had impacted on her life in ways he could never undo.
While his mother’s revelations hadn’t proven she was directly responsible for Connor Flynn’s death, she had been instrumental in the events of that night.
He wasn’t sure how or if he and Ava could come back from that.
Ava hadn’t returned to Dapplebury House or, as far as he knew, the grounds since the day she had visited him there.
She hadn’t even been to see the progress of the move.
Despite Mary explaining that Ava’s haemophobia tended to keep her away, he found himself hoping she’d come each day.
Now he was sitting outside her cottage, he wasn’t sure what he was going to say, or how he intended to say it.
Except he knew he had to speak to her. He had to find out if she had feelings for Gino because he knew they weren’t an item when he’d first returned to Dapplebury, and yet he’d heard her say she loved him.
In light of all that had passed between them, that was confusing.
Henry was good at reading people, and he’d been sure Ava’s reaction towards him, and the feelings she expressed were genuine.
For him, being intimate with Ava felt unlike being with any other woman he had known.
Surely that wasn’t one-sided. More than anything, he had to know if there was any chance of Ava considering a future with him.
He was here for answers. Bolstered by his thoughts, Henry left the car.
As he rang the bell, he heard a chorus of yaps and barks and smiled, despite the slight quake of nerves he could feel growing inside.
He knew the puppies must be nine weeks old and would be going to new homes soon. Seeing them would be good.
‘Hello.’ Mary smiled.
Henry looked at her as she opened the door, disappointment twisting in his stomach.
Not that he hadn’t come to like her; he did.
Since they’d been working together on the charity relocation, he had come to appreciate her no-nonsense, say-it-as-it-is approach to life.
But he had hoped to see Ava alone, and whenever he tried that at her cottage, Mary somehow thwarted it.
‘Is Ava home?’
‘No, she’s at the shop today. I’m here on puppy duty. Do you want to come in? I’ve put the kettle on.’
Henry’s initial instinct was to head to the charity shop while his confidence allowed, but realising this might be his last chance to see the puppies he decided to take Mary up on her offer.
‘Thanks, that would be good.’ He ducked to enter, wiped his feet and followed Mary through to the kitchen, remembering the all too brief but thoroughly lovely times he had spent in the cottage with Ava.
‘Wow! Look at you all.’ Henry took in the sight of a very excited Myrtle and her five energetic puppies.
While he’d watched many litters grow, the stark contrast between seeing these pups being born to the bundles of energy that were before him now was staggering.
It was a reminder of how much time had passed.
And how much had changed as the weeks had gone by.
Their shiny coats were chocolate, the colour of Granger, while they had Myrtle’s ears and build.
Their markings were varied, from white socks to flashes on their chest and exuberant tails.
All had big paws and, he was sure, mischief on their minds.
As he stepped over the baby gate erected at the kitchen door, he became an instant source of fascination with the puppies who snuffled around his feet and chewed his laces.
Bending down, he attempted to distract them with their array of toys; squeaky balls, teddies, knotted ropes — none seemed to interest them as much as his trainers.
‘Ava will be sorry she missed you.’
‘Really? Do you think so?’
Having just taken the milk from the fridge, Mary paused. ‘Honestly. I don’t know. I mean, I know she wants to see you. I’m just not sure if she thinks it’s the best idea.’
‘For who?’ Henry realised his voice sounded curt.
He and Mary were getting along, and he didn’t want to spoil that by allowing his frustration and confusion over the situation with Ava to make him appear abrupt.
He attempted to rephrase the question. ‘Do you know what makes her think it’s not the best thing?
’ He had to be careful; he wasn’t sure how much Mary knew.
Their conversations until now had focused mainly on the charity and the facilities at Dapplebury House.
If, and when, Ava decided to share the details of her — their — mothers’ pasts was up to her.
Mary turned to look at him. She screwed up her nose and offered him a small smile. ‘We’re best friends and friends talk. I know . . . everything.’ She poured milk into two mugs before putting it back in the fridge.
‘OK.’ Henry nodded. Being careful to avoid the puppies, he pulled a chair out. As it scraped against the flagstone floor, one attempted to bark at the noise. Henry laughed.
‘Are you quacking at me?’
The puppy, with a yellow collar and white markings that made it look like it was wearing socks, tried again. Henry ruffled the fur around its too-big ears and sat down before letting out a long breath. ‘When you say everything . . .’
Mary removed the teabags from their mugs and lifted the sugar bowl.
Henry shook his head. ‘No, thank you.’
‘You two as children and teenagers, your parents as friends and . . . lovers.’
Henry nodded. ‘So literally everything.’ He said it with a smile; there was no other way to respond. He’d never wanted to imagine anything intimate between his parents. Hearing of his mother’s affair had given him a whole lot more to try to put to the back of his mind.
Mary took the two mugs of tea from the side and walked towards the table, a task that was akin to running the gauntlet as she avoided the puppies. Joining Henry, she sat down.
‘So did you come to see the puppies, or did you have something you wanted to say to Ava?’
‘If I told you I was here just to see the puppies, would you believe me?’
‘No.’
‘Ha, well, I think you have your answer.’
Mary smiled. She rubbed her thumb around the rim of her mug before making eye contact.
‘Henry, look. The past between your parents, it’s complicated.
Really complicated. But I’ll tell you what I’ve tried to tell Ava — don’t let the past stop you from having the future you want.
You and Ava are both lovely people. Lovely people who are hanging on to promises and responsibilities to parents who lived their lives in the way they chose to.
This is your time now — don’t let the past stand in your way. ’
Henry was a little taken aback. He took a moment to absorb Mary’s words and stroked Myrtle who had decided it was her turn for a fuss. ‘But Ava—’
‘Loves you.’ Mary bit her lip. ‘Sorry, I don’t know if I was supposed to say that. Actually, I’m pretty sure I wasn’t supposed to say that but—’
‘The night the puppies were born I heard her say she loves Gino. You were here. She said it to you.’
‘Of course she loves Gino. She loves him as she loves me. He’s her friend; he has been since he took over The Brown Dog. He’s a good listener and helped her when her mum passed. He’s not her best friend, obviously, that’s me, but—’
‘So she’s not in love with Gino.’ Henry felt a little dizzy.
‘No, she never has been. Gino can be a right pain but he has a lot of good qualities too. Yes, he’s very good-looking, but he’s also kind, caring, a good listener—’
‘OK, I get the picture.’
Mary’s cheeks flushed. ‘Anyway, I tried to get them together but it was never going to happen. They hit it off as friends and they’ve stayed that way ever since.’
‘And you think she loves me.’ Henry felt an uncontainable grin tugging at his lips.
‘If you can’t see that you’re blind. I can see it every time she speaks about you.’
‘But with what happened, how can she be with me when—’ Henry bent to pick up the puppy that was tugging and growling at his shoelace. She had a white front like Myrtle’s and adorable Malteser eyes; he held her in his arms. ‘When being with me will remind her of why she grew up without a father.’
‘She always knew about her father’s accident, even if she blocked the details out.
You two shouldn’t be punished for the actions of your parents.
If Lily had told her the truth it wouldn’t be something she’s coping with now, without her mum here to answer questions.
Don’t get me wrong, I loved Lily. She was an amazing woman.
But this, it isn’t fair. Perhaps knowing more, understanding the things she’d blocked out, might have helped Ava with her fear of blood.
Lily must have known that but still she chose not to tell her.
Parents, they have a lot to answer for.’
‘I guess.’ Henry thought about his own parents and remembered his mum saying she’d been twenty-one when she and his father had taken over Dapplebury House and the estate. ‘But how old were they when the accident happened?’
‘Probably similar to our ages now.’ Mary shrugged.
‘And do you feel you’ve got a handle on life or all of the answers? Because I don’t.’
Mary looked thoughtful. ‘Bugger me! Don’t get philosophical on me. I have a long list of things I hold my parents personally responsible for and I am not sure I’m ready to change my world view on that.’
Henry laughed, and the pink-collared puppy licked his face.
‘Well, Myrtle and Blossom are fans. Now all you have to do is convince Ava to give you a chance.’
‘Blossom?’
‘Ava’s keeping that pup. She was the weakest and needed the most care and now she says she can’t let her go.’
Henry looked at Blossom, then down at Myrtle still snuggled up close to him. If only Ava’s affections were as easy to gain as that of her dogs.
Mary took a sip of her tea. ‘That’s the thing about Ava. She has a big heart and she’s loyal. Once she loves you, you know she’ll love you forever.’
Henry hung on to the words. He knew she loved him once; she hadn’t denied their teenage affection for each other when his mother mentioned it, any more than he had.
‘I hope you’re right. I’m just not sure Ava will think being together is the right thing in light of . . .’ He let his words trail off.
‘Then you’ll have to convince her, won’t you. And I think your plans for the end of the festival will be just the time to do it.’