Chapter 24
The Reckoning
Ava woke up achy in places she wasn’t used to.
She couldn’t bring herself to regret the moment she shared with Owen last night, but she had some regrets about where they shared their moment.
Her back and hips ached from laying on the rigid surface of the desk.
She glanced down at her thigh, pulling back her sleep shorts to reveal the hickey underneath. He’d left his mark.
Her mind turned to the new information she’d learned last night. Owen was renovating the Agatha Building, now Birdie’s Bed and Breakfast, exactly how she’d imagined it all those years ago. He’d bought the building. Their building.
Maybe she shouldn’t have left him the way she had last night.
But he’d looked so peaceful, and she couldn’t tell Summer she’d been fucking her brother and wouldn’t need a ride home.
She wasn’t sure how Summer would receive the news about her hooking up with Owen.
Instead of confessing where she’d been, she stuck with her story of needing air and had gone for a long walk around the lake before returning to the bar.
So what if Summer eyed her mussed hair and untucked shirt with raised eyebrows?
Until she talked to Owen, it didn’t feel right to inform Summer.
It might get her hopes up, or she might be pissed.
Either way, Ava’s mouth was zipped until she had more time to process the fact she’d had sex with Owen on his grandfather’s antique desk, and he’d made her come three times.
Not that she was counting.
The knot in her lower back didn’t help matters.
Ava checked her phone, relief and anticipation warring inside her, to find there were no missed notifications from Owen. She padded downstairs for coffee, hoping the early hour meant her brothers wouldn’t be awake yet.
That hope deflated on seeing Lucas at the dining table fiddling with something. As she walked by, the skunky smell took her by surprise. She stopped short to get a closer look. “Uh Lucas. What’s going on here?”
Lucas stopped fiddling with the grinder and looked at her. “Truce? For now?” Lucas asked her.
Their fight was still unresolved, but she could admit she was in no mood to continue bickering with her brothers this morning. Not after the heavy revelations and intimacy she’d shared with Owen that weighed on her mind.
“Yeah, ok. Truce. But our discussion isn’t over.”
“Agreed.”
“Care to explain what you’re doing?”
“Went through Dad’s office some more last night. Came across his weed stash tucked in the back of his desk drawer.”
Her mind flashed briefly to how Owen had lifted her over the desk, spread her legs apart, and kissed up and down her body like he was memorizing every inch of her.
“Earth to Ava.” Lucas waved a hand in front of her face to get her attention.
Ava jolted to reality, embarrassed by where her mind wandered. “Huh?”
“Where’d your mind go?”
“Nowhere. It’s just early, and you caught me off guard. Dad smoked weed?”
“Guess so. It is legal in Maine, so makes sense.”
The click of a lock and creaking hinges of the bathroom door in the hallway alerted them to Noah’s presence. He shuffled into the kitchen, scratching at his stomach absently. He paused at the sight of them and sniffed the air exaggeratedly.
“It smells loud in here. Does my nose deceive me?” He joined Ava in her stance next to the dining table, eyeing the table with interest.
“Lucas and I declared a truce. Apparently, Dad smoked weed; Lucas found the stash in his office.”
“Oh, thank God, I’m too tired to keep fighting this morning.” He threw an arm around Ava’s shoulders and gave her a side hug in reconciliation and offered Lucas a fist bump.
Lucas rolled his eyes but reciprocated.
“So, what are we doing about Dad’s stash?” Noah asked.
“Wake and bake? I know I could use it after the shit sleep I got last night,” Lucas replied.
“Hell yeah!” Noah grinned. “Ava?”
Getting high probably wasn’t the best idea given the circumstances, but it might help the tension rolling off her in the aftermath of her night with Owen. Physically and emotionally. “Why the hell not?”
“I can roll it up,” Noah offered. He took a seat at the table and pulled the rolling papers toward him, reaching to take the grinder from Lucas.
“Look at our baby brother, all grown up now, Lucy. Rolling joints like he’s a pro. When did you learn to do that?” Ava teased him.
“Don’t let the engineering degree fool you. We partied just as hard in college as you hospitality and business majors.”
Ava shared a look of amusement with Lucas, one of the first they’d shared since they’d arrived at the cabin.
“I’m getting myself coffee; I’ll meet you guys on the porch.
” Ava turned away to prepare her morning coffee before settling into her favorite lounge chair on the porch.
Her brothers filtered outside, Noah sinking into the chair next to her while Lucas leaned against the porch railing, facing them.
Lucas lit the joint and closed his eyes on a deep inhale before exhaling in a puff of heady smoke.
He repeated the action, then offered the joint to Ava.
“Why am I last? I rolled it,” Noah protested.
“Oldest to youngest, you know the rules,” Lucas replied.
Ava ignored their exchange in favor of taking her own hit.
Like Lucas, her eyes fluttered shut of their own accord as she pulled a deep drag into her lungs.
As the smoke curled in her throat, her shoulders dropped, releasing the tension threading through her body from the confusing mass of emotions. One more puff, then she passed to Noah.
“I feel like a teenager again, except now we don’t have to hide the smoke from Dad,” Ava said.
Noah smiled, shaking his head. “Except you guys would’ve excluded me. Told me I was too young or some other bullshit before running off with Summer and Owen. Sometimes Matt.”
“As the youngest, it was your duty to be left out for your own good. It evened out the fact you’re the favorite child,” Ava said.
“Bullshit,” Noah countered.
“Not bullshit. You’ve always been the favorite,” Lucas added, taking the joint from Noah to start the cycle again. “It’s certainly never been me. I’m the secret-keeper. The burden-bearer. But I’m not the one Mom and Dad were always proud of.”
Ava eyed Lucas as he busied himself with tapping the ash from the end of the joint over the railing.
“Do we need to get you high every time we want honesty from you?” Ava prodded him.
Lucas rolled his eyes, but the corner of his mouth tipped into a tiny smile before he blew out another plume of smoke. “You’re one to talk about honesty, Dodo.”
Ava accepted the joint once more and took a drag instead of responding to the dig. They were bordering on the territory of their fight the previous day.
“What does that mean?” Noah jumped to her defense.
“Little Noah, who’s not so little anymore.
You’re the favorite. The peacekeeper, the mediator.
The one who smooths over disagreements because you can’t stand friction.
I’m the bad guy. The one who keeps our parents secrets and holds the burdens of their choices.
But Ava? Ava is the avoider. She’d rather ignore her problems than deal with them. ”
Ava exhaled the smoke she held longer than she should have, breaking into a choking cough in the aftermath of Lucas’ assessment. It saved her from responding right away to the stinging insight. He wasn’t wrong.
She passed the joint to Noah, avoiding both their gazes and drinking her coffee to soothe the scratchiness in her throat.
“Ava?” Noah asked cautiously.
She looked at Noah’s face, scrunched with concern.
His hair sticking in every direction made him look even younger than he was.
The joint lay dangling from his fingertips, the smoke curling upward from the ashen end.
She turned to look at Lucas. His face was a careful mask of neutrality. He lifted an eyebrow at her.
She sighed in defeat. “Lucas is right. He’s an asshole, but he’s right. About all of us.”
The siblings sat in silence; the only sound was the deep inhale of Noah taking another drag. Lucas surprised her by speaking first.
“That’s why I came,” he said. “You never ask for help. So, when you finally did, I knew it was important. I knew you were ready to stop avoiding and face something big.”
The backs of Ava’s eyes stung from the unexpected admission. She hid behind her cup of coffee to avoid showing him how his words affected her. She accepted the joint one last time. “Thanks,” she whispered to Lucas.
He nodded once in acknowledgement.
She inhaled again, then cleared her throat after in resolve of what she would tell them next. The weed loosened her tongue and her mind. She needed to tell someone about what happened with Owen, since she couldn’t tell Summer.
“While on the topic of honesty. I had sex with Owen last night,” she said in a rush.
There was a beat of silence as they digested what she shared.
“Ugh, fucking gross,” Lucas scoffed.
“I’m glad you feel comfortable sharing, but, yeah, I second Lucas.” Noah’s face scrunched in discomfort.
“I had to tell someone. I can’t tell Summer. It’s her brother.”
“And we’re your brothers. We don’t want to hear that shit either,” Lucas said.
Noah was quiet as he took the last hit off the joint and stubbed it out on the concrete porch floor. “How do you feel about it?”
“I don’t know,” she confessed.
“You obviously feel something, otherwise you wouldn’t have told us,” Noah pointed out.
“Are we really doing this right now? Since when do we discuss our feelings?” Lucas said, looking at Noah and Ava.
“You just said Ava isn’t honest and I avoid confrontation. Why point out our flaws if none of us are going to do anything about them?” Noah challenged their older brother. He turned back to Ava. “Answer the question. Honestly. How do you feel?”