Chapter 34 The Repeat
The Repeat
Ava paled before him.
“For now? Or for good?”
A single, silent tear rolled down her face. She didn’t wipe it away.
“For good,” he said.
Owen clenched his fists, digging his nails into the skin of his palms to stop himself from reaching for her. He was doing this for Avery. He had to do this.
Her eyes watered, but she held them back, staring defiantly at him. Owen’s heart squeezed painfully in his chest, begging him not to listen to his head.
“Why are you doing this?” she demanded.
Owen braced himself for the fight ahead.
“I have to think about Avery. I can’t let him get hurt when you eventually walk away and go back to New York. He needs someone permanent in his life. He’s already attached to you.”
Ava’s brows scrunched in confusion, a frown pulling at her red lips.
“Who said I’m going to walk away? You’re the one telling me to leave. Just like you told me to leave ten years ago.”
Ava crossed her arms, hugging them tight to each other like she needed to shield herself from him. And maybe she did. Owen ignored the way his chest ached at the sight of her walls going up.
“You haven’t told me you want to stay. Your interview is in a week. Are you still planning to go back for it?”
Please say no. Prove me wrong.
“Well, yeah. Yes, I’m doing the interview. But that doesn’t mean I’ll get the job, or if I do, I could commute. I thought we could talk this out when the time came.”
“So then you’re not staying,” Owen challenged.
“You’re putting words in my mouth. I never said that. I was going to tell you tonight, at the gala, that I had a plan. I talked it over with my brothers and everything. I planned to stay.”
“What plan?”
Owen tracked the movement of her throat as she swallowed, gearing up for her next words.
“Board member positions aren’t full time. At most, I’d have to go to the city for quarterly meetings, but I can do everything else remotely. Like any job, it’s negotiable. There’s a way for us both to win, here,” she said.
“Except Avery loses.” The excuse tasted like acid on his tongue. “His mom is barely around now, and I’m supposed to accept you flitting in and out of our lives regardless of how it will hurt Avery each time you leave? Just like his mom?”
Part of him could understand the logic of her plan. But the protective side of him still panicked at the thought of Ava leaving one day and never coming back. At the thought of Avery feeling abandoned each time she left for the city, leaving him behind. Just like Maddy.
Ava opened her mouth, he assumed to refute him, but she pinched her lips shut and sighed.
Her arms dropping from their protective stance into one of defeat.
Owen fought his instinct to rush to her and apologize.
To do anything he could to remove the sadness from her gaze, but his feet remained glued to the sidewalk.
“It doesn’t matter what I say, you’ve made up your mind. Just like you did before,” she said, her voice quiet.
“You would understand if you were a parent.”
He immediately regretted the words when he said them. They landed like a physical blow, Ava’s spine snapping straight from the shock.
“It’ll always come back to that, won’t it?
Guilt swarmed inside him, morphing into a white-hot burning shame low in his gut that had him breaking into a sweat despite the cool air. That was the worst thing he could’ve said.
“I’m sor—”
“Save it. You got what you wanted Owen, I’ll leave.”
Ava turned from him and walked away. She whipped her phone out, her words to whoever was on the other side drowned out by the click of her heels and the buzz of adrenaline in his ears, taking his heart with her.
This time, he wasn’t sure he’d recover.
Her mind racing, she pulled up her contacts and scrolled to find the person she needed. The line rang and rang, and Ava was certain Lucas wouldn’t pick up. Then, right before the voicemail would’ve kicked on, he answered.
“It’s late.”
“I need you, please. Can you come get me? I’m at the hospital in Portland,” she pleaded.
There was an intake of breath on the other side.
“I’m on my way.”
The line went silent and the light from her phone dimmed. She turned a corner and neared the side entrance to the hospital. Chancing a look over her shoulder, she checked to make sure Owen didn’t follow, even as a part of her hoped to see him. Hoped he came after her this time around.
He didn’t.
Not wanting to be around people inside and the harsh fluorescent lighting that gave her a headache, she leaned against the brick exterior of the hospital.
And she finally allowed herself to cry.
Her chest caved in from the weight of Owen’s words. How he threw her biggest regret in her face, knowing how much it would hurt. Even after telling him she planned to stay. She gave him everything, and it still wasn’t enough.
She wasn’t enough.
The buzz of her phone broke through her haze of heartbreak long enough for her to see the ETA Lucas texted her. Fifty minutes. She could wait fifty minutes to fall apart.
And then she’d do what she did best—tuck her feelings deep in a box to deal with later and get back to work.
In New York.