Chapter 6
Six
Atlas
Shaye hasn't been herself since Bastian attacked.
Her nightmares have become more vivid and the amount of good sleep she has gotten is minimal at best. What worries me is her nightmares seem more like visions of what's to come while my nightmares are of my past. I thought I'd dealt with the trauma of how I got my scars, but seeing Vesper multiple times over the course of a couple of months has shattered every security I built for myself.
Shaye has the most beautiful heart. I don't want her to harden or worse, turn into a killer like me.
I've been trained to slay my enemies, and those who pose a threat to my kingdom.
I've been sent on countless missions and bloodied my hands to keep my country safe.
And I'd willingly dirty my soul further to protect her from the wickedness of this world.
But I know war is ugly and soon, whether I like it or not, Shaye, too, will bloody her hands.
This morning, Shaye left our room early.
As always, she left a note, but part of me wanted to shoot up as she tip-toed around the room and ask to accompany her, however my peace of mind knowing she's protected is stifling her.
I don't want my worry to push her away from me.
She's been smothered her entire life. At some point, I have to trust she can handle herself.
Plus, by the riding leathers she donned, she could only be going to one place.
I know Seraxes will die protecting Shaye, so I let her believe I was still fast asleep.
Once she slipped out of our room, I got ready and trekked up into the mountains.
I've practiced going into my Nox form a handful of times but if I am to master the ability, I'll have to push myself.
I'd rather not unleash Nox in the middle of Stelara.
I found this secluded spot a couple days after Bastian's attack and got to work practicing. I fear I will need Nox when war erupts.
I was too scared to come alone and brought Ronan the first couple times. Now that I have more of a handle, I no longer bother him. He has enough on his shoulders dealing with politics.
Today is the first day I flow in and out of my Transcendent state with ease. I'm getting stronger and more comfortable. But each time I come back to myself, my body is riddled in sweat, despite the frigid temperatures.
My muscles ache and my head pounds. I remind myself why I am practicing, pushing myself so harshly. It's all for Shaye. She will need me at my best if we are to win this war.
"My, my. I see why my cousin is so taken by you."
I snap my neck to look over at the newcomer and meet Thrane's gaze.
"You are quite powerful," he says, neutral mask firmly in place.
I stand, wiping the sweat beading along my hairline with the back of my wrapped hands. An uncomfortable shiver slithers down my spine. I never heard the Frost Elf crunch through the snow when he approached. If he'd had nefarious intentions, I would have been blind to his attack.
The new Frost King offers me a knowing look, as if all my thoughts are now swimming in his head. "We Elves are light on our feet. You'd have to be one of us to have a chance at hearing us."
I nod, keeping my gaze fixed on him as I snatch my shirt and tug it over my head.
"You don't seem frightened by what you just saw.
Feel free to ask whatever questions are dancing in that head of yours.
" Might as well address whatever questions he has now than pretend he didn't see me in my beast form.
Although I've gotten much better at controlling Nox, it still takes several minutes for the inky streaks to purge itself from my skin.
"There are far more things to be frightened of than your transcendent form." His narrowed grey eyes drag from my head down to my boots. Calculating. Cold. As if he's pocketing this information away for when it will best suit him to bring it up again. "How did you find this place?"
Not the question I was expecting. Then again, Thrane never acts the way I think he will.
"I didn't want to practice in your city if I couldn't control Nox," I explain. "I went for a hike one morning and thought this was a good a place as any."
"A wise decision." Thrane nods, taking a few steps toward me. His boots smoosh into the snow, but there's no sound. No wonder I never heard him. He wasn't joking about Frost Elves being light on their feet. "It seems you have it under control."
"I've gotten better." I acknowledge, though flashes of my past come flooding in. Then I see Shaye's face, her golden eyes, the warmth of her skin, and my fear melts. "Is there a reason you came out here, Your Highness?"
"Thrane. Your Highness sounds so stuffy."
"Ok. Is there a reason you came out here, Thrane?"
He clasps his hands behind his back. "Typically, I come here when I need to think or just be alone. Seems I am not the only one who finds this spot comforting."
So, it's not an abandoned overlook like I previously believed. "I can leave – "
"Don't be ridiculous." He waves me off and sits on frost covered boulders carved into the likeness of a chair. "There's no need for us to avoid one another. Especially since you're so set on marrying Aurelia. I suppose that will one day make us family."
I lean against the cracked pillar. "Sounds like you have something you want to get off your chest."
He mulls over his words before stating, "You are protective of her. So am I. I don't want to see her hurt."
"I'm not the one you need to worry about."
Thrane reclines, nodding. "Yes, Bastian has proven himself difficult. He will come for her again."
I shrug, doing my best not to show my actual concern. "I'm not worried about him."
"You should be." His eyes slice over to mine. "Don't be ignorant enough to believe he will abandon her quietly. He is a predator. That won't stop because she denied him for you."
A fierce determination ignites in my stomach. "I won't let him take her."
"His mission has upgraded from rescuing his fiancé to retrieving the heir of Enver Sol.
Whatever you might think Bastian is capable of, you are gravely short in your expectations.
He will become a thorn in your side. The ghost that haunts your sleep.
I fear Aurelia won't have the heart to do what is necessary when the time comes. "
"You mean kill him?"
The faintest smile graces his lips. "That's exactly what I mean."
"Forgive me, I grow tired of you tiptoeing around what you want to say. So speak plainly."
Thrane chuckles, though there's no trace of joy in his face.
"You may not wield fire like your Tronoivan brethren, but you certainly have the fiery disposition.
" He stands, squaring his shoulders to mine.
"Aurelia has a good heart. Despite everything the Midorians put her through, she won't have it in her to put them down. "
"Why are you telling me this? Why not speak to her?"
"As her betrothed – as her protector – it will be your job to do what she cannot." He shrugs. "And maybe she will heed your voice more than mine."
I scoff. "Not likely. She's the most stubborn woman I've ever met." I rub my hand up and down my jawline. I haven't shaved in a couple of days and the hair prickles beneath the pads of my fingers. "Why don't you kill him? You're her kin. And you seem to want Bastian dead just as much as I do."
"I killed Armas Basilius for her. I do not question my willingness to gut the Beast of Midori."
"You question mine?" I furrow my brow.
He sighs, either bored with the conversation or exhausted by it. "I do not question your willingness to scorch this earth for her. I want to make sure we understand one another. What must be done should she fail to agree."
I hesitate only a moment before nodding my head. "It wouldn't be the first time I've had to bloody my hands."
"Of that I have no doubt." He looks across the valley at Stelara gleaming under the sun's rays. "I will have to return soon. I used to be able to go wherever I wanted without anyone batting an eye. Now as king, I can't take a piss without someone wondering where I've run off to."
I laugh. "I do not envy you."
His left eyebrow raises, quickly followed by a smirk. "If you see Aurelia before I do, please pass her a message. I'd like to meet with her at Fendruil. It seems Drexel is not taking well to Armas' death."
"Why do you not call her Shaye?"
He stops from his descent. "That is not her birth name."
"It's the name she still goes by."
He swivels to face me. "To you, perhaps. She will always be Aurelia to me."
"Why not just – "
"Someone needs to remind her of who she is. She's not a lost and wayward princess. She's a Basilius-Sol." His voice is clipped and ripe with irritation. I've pressed a button, unleashing his wrath.
"She can be both a Basilius and a Sol while still remaining Shaye."
"Perhaps. But I won't pretend." There's a ferocity in his eyes I haven't seen since he slayed his grandfather. "She was given that name by those who stole her away in the night. Remaining Ilaria Shaye Kitarni will only hold her back."
"If you believe that, then you don't know her. It's just a name -"
"There is no such thing as just a name. Names bear power. They harness lineage. Ilaria Shaye Kitarni is a relic of a tormented past. Aurelia Basilius-Sol is who she is – who she was always meant to be. She doesn't feel worthy enough to claim it. One day, she will."
I smirk, willing to risk his ire. "Then I suppose it will be really tough for you to address her as Lady Harland."
"With all due respect, I will never address her as such." There's a joviality in his tone that purges the tension in my shoulders.
"Can't say I'm surprised," I laugh.
Thrane starts to walk down the hill. "Don't forget to give Aurelia my message."